I Don’t Know Which Is Worse. Smacking Your Head At The Bottom Of A Pool Or Falling Through A Roof.

I don’t know which is worse. Smacking your head at the bottom of a pool or falling through a roof.

Either way it goes, insurance may or may not give a crap. 😀

tenshiacademy - Tenshi Academy

More Posts from Tenshiacademy and Others

1 year ago

The cat in the background is planning to do some unspeakable things. 😨

tenshiacademy - Tenshi Academy
2 years ago

I don’t care who you are, I love you anyways as long as you’re being a good person to yourself and anything and everything around you. Stay awesome, babes. ❤❤❤

Please Reblog is Your Blog is Safe for Non-Binary People.

If my mutuals can’t rb this then we can’t be mutuals


Tags
2 years ago

@artsykitty901er​ Thanks for tagging me!

(Couldn’t find the color-changing thing for the letters, had to improvise 😭)

Way Back Home - SHAUN and Conor Maynard

Look Up Child - Lauren Daigle

Brother - Kodaline

Better - Gamma Skies and Emmi

Let You Go - Mountenz

Never Good Enough - JDAM

@himoutolikesjojo​

@makamoto-angry​

@keylitiangrajales2007​

new tag game!! your name as your music taste :) [nicknames are also allowed!!]

weezer

the smashing pumpkins

green day

Conan gray

tally hall

@wantmeifyouwantme @pimplepogue @cloudycleric @delusional-dingus @inwayovermyhead @aceoflanterns @weirdo09 and anyone else that wants to join in!!!


Tags
1 year ago

This is going to be my wedding cake. No questions asked.

White Chocolate Mocha Cake
White Chocolate Mocha Cake
White Chocolate Mocha Cake

White Chocolate Mocha Cake

2 years ago

Vampire drive thrus

Sakamaki: at a vampire drive thru

Reiji: yes, 6 happy meals please

Reiji: drives to window

Server: hands them 6 girls

Server: will that be all sir?

Reiji: yes thank you

Ayato: MINE DOESN'T HAVE BIG ENOUGH BOOBS- I WANNA REFUND

Reiji: THERE ARE STARVING VAMPIRES IN AFRICA WHO WOULD LOVE TO EAT THAT HUMAN SO STOP BEING UNGRATEFUL


Tags
1 year ago

I need to know how the most epic battle in history ended.

Please.

Share this information.

BREAKING NEWS: I GOIG TO FUCKING GET YOU

2 years ago
HAPPY ST. PATRICK’S DAY 2023! 💚🍏🥗📗🟢🟩

HAPPY ST. PATRICK’S DAY 2023! 💚🍏🥗📗🟢🟩


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2 years ago

This is my new favorite piece of digital art because I love bubbles and that shade of blue! Super, duper pretty and cute!

★ 【桃花】 「 Arona // Blue Archive 」 ☆ ✔ Republished W/permission ⊳ ⊳ Follow Me On

★ 【桃花】 「 arona // blue archive 」 ☆ ✔ republished w/permission ⊳ ⊳ follow me on twitter

2 years ago

The tea was so hot in this story that I evaporated into thin air-

(But in Childe’s, did she fake loving him so Scara could be lured in for punishment?? At the end, she was thinking about how she was happy stuff hadn’t been exchanged yet. A little bit confused, but, 100,000,000/10 on the drama scale!)

or forever hold your peace.

summary: they object your wedding.

includes: kaeya and scaramouche.

warnings: gender neutral reader but you do walk down the aisle in kaeya's part, acts of violence in scaramouche's part, angst, slight childe slander towards the end of scaramouche's part.

notes: i wanted to write about this idea, forgot about it, and suddenly remembered it tonight. cue the next two to three hours spent writing.

kaeya.

kaeya found you before you could even walk down the aisle, just as you thought he would. although he would never admit it, you suspected he was too shy to oppose your matrimony in front of all your guests in the favonius cathedral. that, and it would be too much of a scandal, the cavalry captain objecting your marriage to diluc, an ex-knight.

so when you turned the corner and saw kaeya leaning against the wall, eye closed as if in deep thought, you were only slightly unprepared.

you paused and took a deep breath, steadying yourself, before moving again, determined to ignore him. kaeya knew you were there, he must have, yet he let you march past him without a word. it was only when you were a few steps from the doors that led to the aisle that he spoke. 

“don’t do it,” he whispered, so reverently that he might have been reciting a prayer. you paused and turned towards him, already shaking your head. 

but kaeya had already pushed himself off the wall and was now striding towards you, pleading as he did so. “don’t marry him, [you].”

you backed up a few steps, still shaking your head, and kaeya stopped, only feet away from you. 

“kaeya, don’t,” you said with a small frown. “don’t do this. go home. leave.”

“you know i can’t,” he said. he stared at the double doors that led to the entrance. “i can’t sit at home knowing you’re marrying another man.”

you said nothing at that. 

you knew that you should just push past him and begin your procession down the aisle. your guests were sitting and waiting. diluc would begin to wonder if you had gotten cold feet. the knights of favonius would be sent to find you if you did not show up soon. 

but you couldn’t move. 

“i waited too long,” kaeya continued at your silence. his voice was laced with bitter regret. “i should have asked you out before he got the chance.”

“don’t,” you interrupted, suddenly angry. “don’t talk to me about that.”

kaeya ignored you. “but by then it was too late—“

“so why wait to tell me this now?” you cut him off. “why wait until the day of my wedding? did you finally realize that you could no longer have me?”

“yes.” the tiny one-word confession took you by surprise. you had expected kaeya to deny your accusation and give you a cheap excuse, not offer you the honest truth. 

“then you should have realized that years ago,” you responded, finally shoving past him. you paused and spared him one last glance over your shoulder. “i— i waited for you to confess your feelings to me. maybe i would have ended things with diluc.”

your truth was even uglier than his. “but it’s too late now. and i will not settle for you because you realized that i moved on.” 

a small part of you wondered if that last part was entirely true. and if it wasn’t, how was this at all fair to diluc? 

swallowing back the guilt and shame and questions, you faced forward again and forced yourself to continue onwards, to the entrance of the nave, down the aisle, up the to alter.

and this time, kaeya did not stop you. 

scaramouche.

it was a small ceremony in the zapolyarny palace. 

you stood at the alter across from childe with pulcinella as your officiant. the few harbingers that had not been sent out on a mission served as your witnesses. they sat in benches set up previously set up by lesser agents. 

as pulcinella continued his rather long speech about love and matrimony, you scanned your guests and found yourself disappointed that scaramouche was not there. but after being missing-in-action for the past couple of years, you really should have known better than to expect him. 

his betrayal of the fatui was evident, but you had still wanted him at your wedding. 

“and now we will begin the vows,” pulcinella announced. you turned your attention back to childe. you wondered if he had actually taken the time to memorize his vows, but that question was swiftly answered when he pulled out a neatly-folded piece of paper from his suit. 

childe cleared his throat and opened his mouth to begin, but before he could start the doors to the room slammed open with a loud bang. 

scaramouche stormed in shortly after and marched down the aisle, stopping short of the alter. the other harbingers got to their feet but one look from pulcinella warned them not to attack. you paid them no attention. you were unable to do anything but stare at scaramouche because he was actually here. 

“look at this,” he said, his voice full of venom. “this pathetic wedding. is this really what the harbingers have been up to without me?”

his laugh was without humor. it sounded more like a cackle and sent shivers down your spine. childe noticed and moved to stand in front of you, and scaramouche let out another mirthless laugh. “i mean… i had heard word of this little… ceremony. but really, who would have thought it’d be true?”

“what are you doing here, balladeer?” childe demanded. he had not yet summoned his vision, but it was clear he would at any given moment. “have you come to tell us why you’ve been gone for half a decade? why you have betrayed the tsaritsa?”

“no, of course not. that's none of your concerns,” scaramouche sneered. he pointed at you and childe and turned to face the room. “i’ve come to object this—“

scaramouche wasn’t able to finish because at a nod from pulcinella, arlecchino, the closest one to him, had tackled him to the ground, knocking the wind out of him as she did. immediately the other harbingers moved to help her immobilize him, but arlecchino waved them off as she forced scaramouche to his knees in front of the alter. he struggled in her grasp, letting out a strangled, “what is the meaning of this?”

arlecchino angrily responded, “you admit you betrayed the tsaritsa and snezhnaya, though we already knew that. now that we've got you here, you will be answering our questions."

“we lured you here,” childe said, cutting off any protests from scaramouche. he stepped down to crouch in front of the balladeer. “spread rumors about me marrying [you]. you must have been out of practice in your absence for you to fall for such an elementary trap.”

he jerked his head to you. “it was their idea, actually. get you to object the wedding because you had been half in love with them before you disappeared. they even thought to exclude pierro and il captino to increase the odds of you showing your face.”

scaramouche turned to you then. betrayal and disgust shone on his face, but he didn’t look as surprised as you might have thought he would. maybe deep down inside, he had always known that you were capable of this. you were a member of the fatui, after all.

you gave him a wicked little grin. 

“oh but they’re coming,” you cooed. panic flashed in scaramouche’s eyes. you turned to arlecchino and then to il dottore, who was waiting to intervene if scaramouche somehow escaped. “take him away. we’ll let the jester deal with him however the tsaritsa desires.”

you ignored scaramouche's hurled insults and screams as the two of them dragged him out of the room to wherever the first harbinger was waiting. the few others left soon after. all that was left was you and childe and pulcinella, the latter still standing at the alter. 

“shall we continue?” childe asked. you merely laughed and walked out, only grateful that scaramouche had interrupted before the vows and rings were exchanged. 

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tenshiacademy - Tenshi Academy
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