What Happens Once You Kill Yourself? Because I'm Ready To Go.

What happens once you kill yourself? Because I'm ready to go.

You wanna know what happens once you kill yourself? Your mother comes home from work and finds her baby dead and she screams and runs over to you and tries to get you to wake up but you won’t and she keeps screaming and shaking you and her tears are dripping onto your face and your dad hears all the screaming and runs into the room and he can’t even speak because the child that he loved and the child that he watched grow up is gone forever and finally your little sister runs into the room to see what all the fuss is about and she sees you dead. The person she looked up to and loved. The person she bragged about to  her friends, the person she wanted to be just like when she grew up, the person that made her feel safe. But she’s never really going to get to grow up and smile and laugh and love because she’ll always be consumed with this feeling of missing you. And now there’s something missing from your family and they can barely look at each other anymore because everything reminds them of you but you’re gone and hurts more than anything. and you think that your mom never cared because she was always busy and yelling at you to finish your homework and clean your room and forgot to say I love you sometimes but really, she loved you more than anything and she doesn’t leave the house anymore, she can’t even get out of bed and she’s getting thinner and thinner because it’s too hard to eat. Your father had to quit his job and he doesn’t sleep anymore, every time he closes his eyes he sees his baby dead, and the image never goes away no matter how much alcohol he drinks. And at school your best friend sees that your seat is empty and she gets this sick feeling in her stomach and that’s when she hears the announcement. You killed yourself. And suddenly she’s screaming and crying in the middle of class and no one even bothers comforting because they’re all  busy sitting there staring at your empty seat with tears dripping down their cheeks and all she wants is for you to hug her and tell her it’s gonna be okay like you always did, but this time, you’re not there to do it, everything is dark now that you’re gone and her grades are slipping, she barely goes to school anymore and she ended up in hospital after taking too many pills because she wanted to see you again. the girls who used to make fun of the way you dressed feel their throats get tight, they don’t talk to each other anymore, they don’t talk to anyone, they’re all in therapy trying so hard not to blame themselves but nothing works. and your teacher who always gave you a hard time stares blankly at the wall, she quits her job a few days later. And then your boyfriend hears the news and he can’t breathe, he still calls you a lot just to hear your voice and he talks to you on facebook but you never message him back, he can’t fall in love again because every girl he meets reminds him of you, he’s never going to get over you, he loved you and he cries himself to sleep every night, hating himself and slicing his skin because he couldn’t save you and he’s never going to hold you in his arms or hear you laugh again. Now everyone who knew you, whether they were a big part of your life or someone you passed in the hallway a few times a week, they carry this aching feeling around inside them because you’re gone, and they miss you, and they don’t know why you left but it must’ve been their fault and they should’ve stopped you and they should’ve told you they loved you more and that feeling is never going to go away. And so you killed yourself

but you killed everyone else around you too. 

More Posts from Stupid-bitch-anne and Others

3 years ago

hey! as an artist do you ever feel discouraged by the like/reblog ratio here? ive been postin art here for some time and ive found for every 20 likes i get maybe 1 reblog and while i dont wanna come over as greedy it like kinda discourages me :( i would rlly like to stay on tumblr bc it feels much more anonymous than insta/twitter but i also crave Validation ykno. ty in advance!

Okay, but I fear you won’t like my answer... 

My reply is - no, I don’t, because tumblr actually makes it super easy to ignore the reblog/like ratio. The two are lumped together into a category called ‘notes’ so unless you are looking for it, you won’t know what your reblog/like ratio is, and it’s super easy to view it as a lump sum of people who saw your art and smiled.

Here’s the thing; liking vs reblogging is not personal. And it isn’t something to try to change the tide over. I’ve seen my fair share of posts on here AND twitter, with most of them CONDEMNING liking - going so far as to call it useless. But I disagree. Strongly. 

Hey! As An Artist Do You Ever Feel Discouraged By The Like/reblog Ratio Here? Ive Been Postin Art Here

My opinion on the matter is this - if people wanted to reblog the post, they would reblog it. If they don’t, the cards weren’t right. The stars didn’t align. It isn’t a matter of quality - it’s a matter of the right content being there at the right time for the right audience. Because let’s face is - PLENTY of stuff gets reblogged.... when the circumstances are right.

But the circumstances HAVE to be right. EXACTLY right. There has to be a CHAIN of the exact right circumstances. That’s how sharing ANYTHING works. 

Let me put it this way - say we have a hypothetical follower called J. 

J is scrolling his dashboard and comes across a post he likes, say, of a frog picture. He likes the post and has to make a decision - to reblog or not reblog the frog?

Hey! As An Artist Do You Ever Feel Discouraged By The Like/reblog Ratio Here? Ive Been Postin Art Here

Say he likes the frog enough to reblog. It’s  a natural thing - he wants to show it to his followers. He may not think of it consciously, but he’s following an instinct to share information with people. 

But what happens after? Well, it’s not RANDOM. The thing is, J’s followers are NOT the followers of the blog he reblogged it from. They’re a degree of separation from the OP, and are therefore that much less likely to share interests that align with the OP’s content. 

SO what happens is this:

Hey! As An Artist Do You Ever Feel Discouraged By The Like/reblog Ratio Here? Ive Been Postin Art Here

Some people on J’s follower list see the frog and like it. 

Of the ones that like it, a percentage are just liking out of habit and politeness.

A few are liking it to find it later and show it to their irl friends.

A few are liking it because they DON’T want to reblog it, because it doesn’t align with what they want to show to THEIR followers (who are, let’s be honest, even MORE removed from the OP’s frog-centric content).

And who’s to blame? 

ABSOLUTELY NO ONE. Because you cannot force people to reblog stuff any more than you can force people to show their friend their phone when they see a funny meme. 

Can you imagine something like this happening?

Hey! As An Artist Do You Ever Feel Discouraged By The Like/reblog Ratio Here? Ive Been Postin Art Here
Hey! As An Artist Do You Ever Feel Discouraged By The Like/reblog Ratio Here? Ive Been Postin Art Here
Hey! As An Artist Do You Ever Feel Discouraged By The Like/reblog Ratio Here? Ive Been Postin Art Here
Hey! As An Artist Do You Ever Feel Discouraged By The Like/reblog Ratio Here? Ive Been Postin Art Here
Hey! As An Artist Do You Ever Feel Discouraged By The Like/reblog Ratio Here? Ive Been Postin Art Here

This is ridiculous, right? We cannot presume that people are not reblogging because they’re out to be malicious on purpose. Most likely they just aren’t motivated enough to share it in their own social circles for their own reasons - and that’s FINE. 

Look, I get it. People not sharing your stuff gets you less notes. I get how that is disappointing. But if you put ALL of your motivation into internet clout, then you have to put effort into making your art VISIBLE. That’s the only way to get more reblogs. 

For example, if you’re prioritizing visibility:

Get more social media accounts. Make sure the usernames are the same, or at least recognizable, across all social media. 

Organize your art tumblr and twitter. Make a pinned post that shows off your best work. TAG! Learn common tags used for artwork similar to yours.

Interact with other artists! Comment on posts! Reblog others’ artwork! 

NETWORK!!! That is the only way to guarantee that the flowchart of reblogs gets more than once branch.

Twitter circumvents this issue by shoving likes in your face as often as Retweets and that’s certainly one way to give your reblog-tree a boost, but it’s not foolproof. Tumblr has tags you can follow - and that DOES give you more of a possibility of getting reblogs of the content because if people are in a tag, they are LOOKING for stuff. On purpose. They already like what they see.

I feel your pain, I really do, because it took me literal YEARS to find an audience that consistently likes and reblogged my stuff. And your audience deserves to find you - but your followers aren’t your agent. It’s not their job to advertise on your behalf. 

They’ll reblog when they want to - and that’s a good thing. It’s more genuine that way. 

4 years ago

Hey Ninjago Fandom;

Can we all collectively agree that if you grew up watching the show (like I did, for example) and didn't have a crush on one of the characters, then you had no childhood?

Bonus points to my fellow fans that still be simpin for them character(s)!


Tags
3 years ago

How dare you all

I always cook the most hearty foods possible and spoil Link with every chance I get (more expensive inn-stays, the most healing foods, lots of elixirs, nearly every outfit in the game, etc).

I'm starting a revolt against those of you that make him eat raw foods and pull all-nighters

My Friend Who Has Been Hunting All Of The Korok Seeds Has Allowed Link To Eat Nothing But Raw Food

My friend who has been hunting all of the korok seeds has allowed Link to eat nothing but raw food


Tags
3 years ago
US Helplines:
US Helplines:

US Helplines:

Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696

Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433

LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255

Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386

Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743

Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438

Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673

Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272

Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000

Exhale: After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-4394253

Child Abuse: 1-800-422-4453

UK Helplines:

Samaritans (for any problem): 08457909090 e-mail jo@samaritans.org

Childline (for anyone under 18 with any problem): 08001111

Mind infoline (mental health information): 0300 123 3393 e-mail: info@mind.org.uk

Mind legal advice (for people who need mental-health related legal advice): 0300 466 6463 legal@mind.org.uk

b-eat eating disorder support: 0845 634 14 14 (only open Mon-Fri 10.30am-8.30pm and Saturday 1pm-4.30pm) e-mail: help@b-eat.co.uk

b-eat youthline (for under 25’s with eating disorders): 08456347650 (open Mon-Fri 4.30pm - 8.30pm, Saturday 1pm-4.30pm)

Cruse Bereavement Care: 08444779400 e-mail: helpline@cruse.org.uk

Frank (information and advice on drugs): 0800776600

Drinkline: 0800 9178282

Rape Crisis England & Wales: 0808 802 9999 1(open 2 - 2.30pm 7 - 9.30pm) e-mail info@rapecrisis.org.uk

Rape Crisis Scotland: 08088 01 03 02 every day, 6pm to midnight

India Self Harm Hotline: 00 08001006614

India Suicide Helpline: 022-27546669

Kids Help Phone (Canada): 1-800-668-6868

FREE 24/7 suicide hotlines:

Argentina: 54-0223-493-0430

Australia: 13-11-14

Austria: 01-713-3374

Barbados: 429-9999

Belgium: 106

Botswana: 391-1270

Brazil: 21-233-9191

China: 852-2382-0000

(Hong Kong: 2389-2222)

Costa Rica: 606-253-5439

Croatia: 01-4833-888

Cyprus: 357-77-77-72-67

Czech Republic: 222-580-697, 476-701-908

Denmark: 70-201-201

Egypt: 762-1602

Estonia: 6-558-088

Finland: 040-5032199

France: 01-45-39-4000

Germany: 0800-181-0721

Greece: 1018

Guatemala: 502-234-1239

Holland: 0900-0767

Honduras: 504-237-3623

Hungary: 06-80-820-111

Iceland: 44-0-8457-90-90-90

Israel: 09-8892333

Italy: 06-705-4444

Japan: 3-5286-9090

Latvia: 6722-2922, 2772-2292

Malaysia: 03-756-8144

(Singapore: 1-800-221-4444)

Mexico: 525-510-2550

Netherlands: 0900-0767

New Zealand: 4-473-9739

New Guinea: 675-326-0011

Nicaragua: 505-268-6171

Norway: 47-815-33-300

Philippines: 02-896-9191

Poland: 52-70-000

Portugal: 239-72-10-10

Russia: 8-20-222-82-10

Spain: 91-459-00-50

South Africa: 0861-322-322

South Korea: 2-715-8600

Sweden: 031-711-2400

Switzerland: 143

Taiwan: 0800-788-995

Thailand: 02-249-9977

Trinidad and Tobago: 868-645-2800

Ukraine: 0487-327715

(Source)

4 years ago

Disney's writer wage-theft is far worse than reported

Disney's Writer Wage-theft Is Far Worse Than Reported

Back in November, we learned that Disney had pulled a breathtakingly criminal wage-theft manuever on one of science-fiction’s most beloved authors, Allan Dean Foster, an elderly cancer-patient caring for his sick wife.

https://pluralistic.net/2020/11/19/disneymustpay/#disneymustpay

Foster is the bestselling author of some of the most successful movie novelizations ever, from the first STAR WARS novel to ALIENS novels and more. Thanks to Disney’s monopolistic buying spree of companies like Lucas and Fox, they now owned the movies and Foster’s contract.

Here’s where things get criminally weird. Disney argued that when they bought out Lucas, Fox, etc, they acquired their assets, but not their liabilities. In other words, they’d acquired the right to sell Foster’s work, but not the obligation to pay him when they did.

This is not how copyright contracts work, period. If it were, then any publisher with a runaway bestseller novel could incorporate a new company, sell its assets - but not its liabilities - to that company, and stiff the writer.

Both Foster’s agent and the Science Fiction Writers of America tried to negotiate with Disney quietly on this, but they were stonewalled and insulted (Disney insisted that they wouldn’t even *discuss* a deal without first getting nondisclosure agreements from Foster, another unheard-of tactic).

After failing to make progress with private negotiations, they went loudly public, launching the #DisneyMustPay campaign. The good news is, the campaign was successful, and Foster has been paid.

The bad news is that the campaign flushed out *many* writers who are also having their wages stolen by Disney. The company is stalling them, too - refusing to search its records or volunteer info unless the authors can name the specific instances in which they’ve been robbed.

In response, SFWA has joined forces with the Romance Writers of America, the Horror Writers of America, the National Writers Union, Sisters in Crime and the Authors Guild to form a coalition called Writers Must Be Paid.

https://www.writersmustbepaid.org/

They have a form where writers who suspect that Disney has stolen their wages can report it, anonymously:

https://airtable.com/shrE1hJbqMHsjP9Ll

There’s a reason for the anonymity: Disney’s anticompetitive mergers (culminating with the destructive Fox merger) has created a monopoly with vast market-power to destroy creators’ livelihoods by excluding them for speaking out.

The coalition has five modest demands for Disney:

I. Honor contracts now held by Disney and its subsidiaries

II. Provide royalty payments and statements to all affected authors

III. Update their licensing page with an FAQ for writers about how to handle missing royalties

IV. Create a clear, easy-to-find contact person or point for affected authors.

V. Cooperate with author organizations who are providing support to authors and agents.

More broadly, I hope this brings more creative workers into the discussion about competition.

Specifically, “monopsony,” the excessive buying power that happens when a companies dominate access to a market, which allows them to squeeze their suppliers, especially workers.

4 years ago

CPD just killed a fifteen year old child.

4 years ago
HAPPY STAR WARS DAY! | May 4th, 2021
HAPPY STAR WARS DAY! | May 4th, 2021
HAPPY STAR WARS DAY! | May 4th, 2021
HAPPY STAR WARS DAY! | May 4th, 2021
HAPPY STAR WARS DAY! | May 4th, 2021
HAPPY STAR WARS DAY! | May 4th, 2021

HAPPY STAR WARS DAY! | May 4th, 2021

4 years ago

Are you a Ninjago fan?

So am I! I'm working on making Ninjago City in Animal Crossing: New Horizons!

I'd love to have visitors, but sadly I'm not allowed to play with people I don't know, however...

Dream Addresses mean I don't interact with people ;)

Have fun y'all!

[The island is still heavily under editing, as it's my first time playing, but I've added some photos of my current progress!]

Are You A Ninjago Fan?

Are You A Ninjago Fan?
Are You A Ninjago Fan?
Are You A Ninjago Fan?

I'll be updating my dream frequently!


Tags
3 years ago

that same anon just sent me ketchup 15 times what did i do to deserve this

  • vibranthavenship
    vibranthavenship reblogged this · 1 week ago
  • hoodlumsss
    hoodlumsss liked this · 1 week ago
  • stiller-engel
    stiller-engel reblogged this · 1 week ago
  • bluej4ym
    bluej4ym liked this · 2 weeks ago
  • howeveragain
    howeveragain reblogged this · 4 weeks ago
  • nefelejtsdelhogykivagy
    nefelejtsdelhogykivagy reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • nefelejtsdelhogykivagy
    nefelejtsdelhogykivagy liked this · 1 month ago
  • morguezlife
    morguezlife liked this · 1 month ago
  • sapphictrex
    sapphictrex liked this · 1 month ago
  • breakin985
    breakin985 liked this · 1 month ago
  • honestlysublimecherryblossom
    honestlysublimecherryblossom liked this · 1 month ago
  • lotus-ignis
    lotus-ignis reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • wheneverythingcrumblesandfalls
    wheneverythingcrumblesandfalls liked this · 1 month ago
  • lanawinterscigarettes
    lanawinterscigarettes reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • choicesthot
    choicesthot reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • fotomantis
    fotomantis reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • fastmovingcurrent
    fastmovingcurrent reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • fastmovingcurrent
    fastmovingcurrent reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • fastmovingcurrent
    fastmovingcurrent liked this · 1 month ago
  • toxic90sboy
    toxic90sboy reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • haiklaa
    haiklaa reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • steviekay101
    steviekay101 reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • steviekay101
    steviekay101 liked this · 1 month ago
  • v1xv4p0rub
    v1xv4p0rub reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • ashevzkyi
    ashevzkyi reblogged this · 1 month ago
  • bohoooitsme
    bohoooitsme liked this · 2 months ago
  • bohoooitsme
    bohoooitsme reblogged this · 2 months ago
  • americasass81
    americasass81 reblogged this · 2 months ago
  • lillywillow
    lillywillow reblogged this · 2 months ago
  • caplanbuckybarnes
    caplanbuckybarnes reblogged this · 2 months ago
  • spideypool-bitch
    spideypool-bitch liked this · 2 months ago
  • oyrca
    oyrca reblogged this · 2 months ago
  • hopeful-engineer
    hopeful-engineer reblogged this · 2 months ago
  • ali-goose
    ali-goose liked this · 2 months ago
  • letstrylovingourselves
    letstrylovingourselves reblogged this · 2 months ago
  • nervosongballoon
    nervosongballoon liked this · 2 months ago
  • whatitshouldvebeen
    whatitshouldvebeen liked this · 2 months ago
  • sielutonlampikana
    sielutonlampikana liked this · 2 months ago
  • fabby-rou
    fabby-rou liked this · 2 months ago
  • grimlittlebunny
    grimlittlebunny liked this · 2 months ago
  • squeefmaster
    squeefmaster reblogged this · 2 months ago
  • jaylenej23
    jaylenej23 liked this · 2 months ago
  • marvelfamily3000
    marvelfamily3000 reblogged this · 2 months ago
stupid-bitch-anne - Anne or smth
Anne or smth

hi I'm cringe and I do shitty art sometimes I'll probs respond to dms just don't ask weird shit fandoms are my passion; making ocs is my obsession

47 posts

Explore Tumblr Blog
Search Through Tumblr Tags