Yall Cannot Convince Me That Bruce Active On Batman Conspiracy Boards And General Shitster Wayne And

Tony: One of my closest friends betrayed me and his best friend killed my parents.

Wanda: My brother and one true love died as well as my parents.

Peter: My parents died when I was a child and then I saw my uncle die infront of me and I got bit by a radioactive spider and I get bullied. Oh! And I was stuck under a building while wearing my homemade suit.

Wanda: Wait, you've been under a building?!

Tony: Wait, you're bullied?!

Damian rn:

Bruce Wayne having to play Fuck, Marry, Kill on a talkshow, except all the options are JL members.

"Tell him to get in line"

Comparing Dick and Jason’s early days with Bruce is so funny, it’s just the opposite of what you’d expect. 

Jason: “wow, I get to live in a mansion!” “and now I get to be Robin?!” “this is awesome!” “let me get to work on that homework now Bruce so we can patrol later” “being Robin gives me magic” :D

Dick: “my parents are dead” “Mr. Wayne is never around” “everything is terrible” “i’m going to sneak out of the house” “Batman, let me kill a man”

Kid batman: feral witch child

Teen batman: unhinged aggressive dork

Tony: Kid, why do you have bruises on your neck??

Peter, too embarrassed to say that he fell down the stairs: ummm... hickeys??

Tony: the fu- KEENER GET YOUR SORRY ASS HERE RIGHT NOW!!!

Peter: wtf???

Superfam & Batfam by Dan Mora.

hc that damian absolutely loves sitting in his mom's lap and talia when she was absolutely sure that nobody from the league was watching them would let damian sit in her lap and tickle his belly and he'd giggle and press his face into her stomach and then they'd fall asleep on the bed together and maybe if damian could work up the courage to ask his mom will ask, "amma do you love me?" and talia would go very still before pressing a kiss to his hair and respond "with everything that i am" and maybe if damian's feeling extra brave he'll wait until talia's almost asleep before asking "do you think baba loves me too?" and talia would reach down to pinch his chubby chubby cheeks and say "he already does. from your ten little toes to your chubby cheeks." and they'd curl up closer to each other and everything will go to hell soon and the cuddle sessions might get rarer and rarer and one day dami will move to gotham but that is then and this is now and right now dami has his amma's strong heartbeat in his ears and her arms around him and a head full of dreams about his baba and everything is okay even if it's just for a little while

Ok ok ok: So when Cass first came to the family their where some problems, like when before going to a gala or anything Cass struggled to make herself presentable she was new to do this and it was stressful, yeah Alfred could help with the dresses and sometimes Barbara could come by but not often. Bruce noticed this and decided to do something, he talked to Diana, to Dinah, to Mari McCabe, to anyone who could help and learned how to do Cass’s make-up and hair. At first it was kinda awkward as Bruce is not a professional stylist and it was weird for Cass to have her dad do her hair, but with time they got used to it. After a couple times it became almost routine not just for Gala’s and fancy events but just for whenever, Bruce sitting on a chair in the bathroom as Cass sits on a little stool, Bruce with bobby pins in his mouth and scrunchies around his wrist, he is actually pretty good at it and sometimes people even asked Cass who did her hair and she never knows what to say. Its not commonly known but its also not a well kept secret, Hal didn’t believe it when Barry told him until Bruce confirmed it. At this point its a tradition and Cass and Bruce almost feel weird when they go to a gala without doing it.

Peter: *creating something in a lab*

Shuri: Bye Brother *walks in*

Peter: *stops*

Shuri: *stops*

Shuri: You have your own lab??

Peter: You have a family??