My Absolute Favorite Green Text Ever

Just don't breed

Omg

Today, I fucked up... by finding a bag of weed on the ground

I live in a small midwest college town so used rubbers, beer cans, and puddles of vomit on the sidewalks are all everyday encounters. But today I was walking down the main party street coming back from playing frisbee with my dog. I’m standing on the corner waiting to cross the street, looking back and forth, when I spot it. Laying on the ground in a cornered off plastic sandwich bag was what had to be at least an eighth of weed. It’s a Saturday afternoon and there are people fucking everywhere. Socially awkward as I am, I figure I can’t just bend down and pick it up for fear of someone seeing me. Luckily I have this dog leash that has a poop bag dispenser built in so I’m like, yeah just pick it up and put it in the non-see-through poop bag. So I do, and I cross the street. I walk for a minute I’m still 10 blocks away from my apartment but off of the main party street and my curiosity starts to get the best of me. I glance around and don’t think anyone is paying attention to me. I reach into the poop bag and open the internal bag of “shit” to check the quality of the goods. Part of me says the price is right so what do you care? But caught up in the moment, and blinded by the concept of free weed; I reach my hand in just to cop a feel of a nug and then foolishly brought the compound bag to my face for a quick sniff. As my nostrils flooded with the smell of sweet cheeba my eyes and ears filled with the sights and sounds of some dude yelling from his deck at me, with at least 20 people around him, “I JUST WATCHED THAT FUCKIN’ GUY FINGER FUCK THAT BAG OF DOG SHIT AND SMELL IT!” My fantasy world came crashing down around me in an instant and the only thing I could think to say was, “ baaaAAHHH…IT’S GOOD SHIT!” Then proceeded to run home and attempted to wipe my short-term memory with free shit-bag weed. Needless to say I’ll never walk down that street again.

by NotVeryMagicMike

I sincerely hope this person is being sarcastic

I'm voting for Trump by the way, he's not being funded by special interest groups/the illumi-fucking-nati like Hilary & Jeb. He's not a racist who wants only illegal Mexicans to leave but he wants our boarders secure from ISIS & The rest of the radicalized Islamic state. They blend in with the Mexicans when crossing or flying in from the southern boarder. Our Muslim Leader Barack Hussein Obama is USA's problem. People in Iran are chanting death to America, but hey let's give em nukes.

“He’s not a racist“ i stopped reading 

In this case it is actually the sun's light passing through tiny ice prisms in cirrus clouds which split the white light into the visible rays you see in the picture. #science #halo #halos #Ireallyfelttheneedtoexplainthis #rainbows #sorry #oops #rainbow #light #sun #color

A circular rainbow spotted in Pune, India. Did you know that rainbow’s are supposed to 360 degrees? Here’s my post on it

Fuck

This is the meaning of life right here

got bored while doing film revision, made this instead

Did you just

I stabbed my geometry homework and it was very graphic

Spring Shred Whistler

False. Hillary Clinton is insane.

now that donald trump is the actual GOP nominee this is your reminder that voting for a Democrat You Hate is still a useful harm reduction procedure that will cancel out a vote for Trump. please practice harm reduction. please, even more importantly in small/red states, vote all the way down in your local races where the margins of victory can be 100 votes or 10 votes, so your state legislature/governor/etc will be strong, if/when everything on the national level goes to hell

believe what you want about your vote not having the intended or ideal level of power, believe what you want about the electoral college or the modern role of voting in a democratic society, believe what you want about american centrism or flawed systems, but don’t let anyone tell you there’s “no difference” in the general election, please don’t let anyone tell you voting does nothing. your vote CAN and WILL protect vulnerable people and help you stand in for people whose votes are being taken away by a gutted VRA and gerrymandering 

please. please vote tuesday november 8th. please.

Dude for real tho I have these and no one knows about them and they are FUCKING amazing, the sound quality is so clear and they can get really loud if you want them to, plus they look fancy AF

Just wanted to let everyone know about LSTN’s work. Not only do they make absolutely stunning speakers like the one above but they donate to Starkey Hearing Foundation with every purchase to help those less of hearing. You also can get $15 off with the discount code 15OFF here