Finney: I Turned Out Perfectly Fine!

Enid: Any tips on how to make someone like me?

Wednesday: Try to make them laugh all the time.

Enid: Oh, wow! You actually help me for once, and it's even good advice!

Wednesday: Yeah, the more they laugh, the more time they spend with their eyes closed, so it'd be easier to go for the kill.

Aftermath of being kidnapped

Person a: robin

Person b: Finney

Person c: the grabber

Billy's dog when he doesn't pay attention to him

Robin: What’s up guys? I’m back.

Finney: What the- you can’t be here. You’re dead. I literally saw you die.

Robin: Death is a social construct.

Judge: how do you plead?

Eddie: (looks at Nancy)

Nancy: (mouths "not guilty")

Eddie: hot milky

Nancy: for fucks sake just lock him up

Dustin: If you put 'violently' in front of anything to describe your action, it becomes funnier.

Lucas: Violently practices.

Eddie: Violently play.

Jonathan: Violently shoots pictures.

Robin: Violently sleeps.

Nancy: Violently studies.

Max: Violently boxes.

Will: Violently murders people.

Steve: Violently worries about the previous statement.

Nancy: you’re a lying, cheating piece of shit! you’re not the woman i married!

Robin: fine, we’ll get a divorce then! and i am taking Steve with me!

Steve, slowly sliding the monopoly board away from them: i think it’s time we stopped playing

Finney: How do I deal with my bullies?

Vance: Kill them

Finney: That's a bit extreme, I was hoping for a more passive solution

Vance: Kill them only a little?

Steve: Don't worry, I have a few knives up my sleeve.

Eddie: I think you mean cards.

Steve, pulling knives out of their sleeves: No, I do not.

Steve convinced Eddie that he was in witness protection during their recovery post-Vecna. Why else would he be constantly alone in such a big house, or be able to afford all the groceries and bills on minimum wage?

Eddie buys it completely, because Steve shows him some old scars and mentions that they were the result of him being kidnapped and interrogated in New York. He's hyped to be let in on such a big secret, swears to take it to his grave, and Steve "rewards" him by admitting his original name; Joseph. (It's actually his middle name, but Eddie is so earnest that he has to put a LITTLE truth into it)

Robin is the one who finally tells Eddie the truth, but Eddie is too impressed with Steve's storytelling to be angry. As punishment, he bullies Steve into helping him write a new campaign, which is how they first discover that Steve's a storytelling prodigy. His ideas make the entire party cry during their next campaign, to Eddie's delight.