This Is Not A Love Triangle Just A Bent Line I'm Not Connecting

I think I misunderstood you Sandman, I apologize You were no devil but protector Throwing your sand in my eyes You kept me safe when I could not bear to be awake My Sandman, my savior I'm sorry, I never realized

When life got overwhelming You brought me a land of dreams A place to rest, to heal Created rejuvenating scenes You were no trickster Feeding me knock out mixtures I'm sorry for my behavior You've been a friend it seems

You were there Maybe you didn't know You weren't aware

But was it fair Of me to ask you if you knew That you were there

To come back unannounced Just in the air around you

Well I was there When a storm came crashing down And soaked your hair

I was unprepared So startled when I woke From that nightmare

To find your hand on my heart Starting to repair

When it's dark And it's too quiet It all feels like too much to bear

But then you're there Even when I worry That you don't care

You know I worry too much Maybe it wears you down

And when I don't declare My presence Still I think you know

You knew I wasn't going anywhere Because you still know me

Next time we're there Let's go back to the meadow Where we put flowers in our hair

The people walking past Won't see us Sitting in our chairs

I said your name You turned your head It was just a whisper in the air

You knew it wasn't just the weather You can't see the wind

That's how I know That all this time you've known That I was there

Did you lay me down Or let me go? From fear or mercy I don't know And you are with me Even so

I feel you in rooms That feel like home See you on streets I drive alone Your serenity Inside my bones

Did you send a song Over a breeze? I can hear your Peaceful melody And I sing with you In harmony

I think I finally understand The rose's thorns I too want to be loved Without being touched

So I am no romantic flower I embody the stem I want to be ideal And practically unattainable

Quiet. There is only quiet. I speak without moving my lips, Without clearing my throat. This voice belongs only to my mind now. It is soft and tender. Words are harsh.

My voice does not criticize me anymore, I have tamed it from the feral creature It once was. Down now, down. My voice wears a collar Though I do not keep it on a leash.

Silent. I am a silent person now. Yes, I speak with lips moving, I converse when I have to.

Is this living? Being a worldly mute? Yes, my voice and I are surviving. Survival is all we can tolerate.

I would live here in my mind if I could If the earthly world did not always snatch me away With its incessant needing and needing Earth, why are you so attached to me?

I am in my mind today, like most days Don't say it is not a place because you can't walk there When your thoughts wander Is it through a desert? A forest? Do you swim?

Everything that has died is alive here Here is my dead friend that I used to kiss, looking well Here is the art I gave up on in frustration Here are the words you said to me in anger The dreams we dreamed together, still breathing

I walk up creaking steps from my stomach to my head The body is such a desperate thing sometimes Always needing validation and hand holding So I would live up here tucked away in the ethereal

Let the wind take it Dissolve into the air The remnants of our Horrible affair

Let the storms have it And with force blown away So I won't think of You for one more day

I grip the windowsill too tightly As the dark clouds pour Heavily over an angry ocean Crashing, spraying, flooding Lightning strikes again, again! It's a storm, it's raging, and it's

Too loud! Too loud! Too loud!

Then you tap on my door You slip into my mind And everything else is on mute

Little spider by the window Resting in the shade I like your coloring I like the web you made

You're hanging upside down In your messy little nest I wonder if you're hungry Or eating tiny pests

I don't know where you came from You suddenly appeared I hope you stay a while I like that you are here

It's in the way you tuck your hair Behind your ear In the way you speak your words Soft and clear In how you make yourself feel close Like you are here The way you navigate the world And hold your fears

It's in the way you tilt your head In photographs The way you light up when you're glad Your sneaky laugh It's how you say what's in your heart And don't hold back How you are strong and hold your own But don't attack

It's in the way your forge your path No compromise When you let me walk with you I get butterflies I love to see which way you go Every surprise Love is in the way you dream Watching the skies

Love is how you've looked at me With kindest eyes Love is when you hold my hand And don't patronize How you've been vulnerable with me Not afraid to cry It's how we let each other breathe Without cutting ties