Crowley From Good Omens ( The Amazon Show) All In Pen.

Yo,my dad was on a hike and walked straight into one of these things. It was on his face and everything. My uncle and him took pictures of it afterwards and it looked like it was smiling.

Those things are definitely nightmare fuel dipped in yellow paint.

[Caption start]

*Speaking quickly* So before Halloween I decided to get online and try to look for some abandoned cemeteries.

So I ended up finding one but it was in the middle of the woods so I decided to just plug some coordinates and take a chance. And I found something a helluva lot scary.

As I am walking the path to find this abandoned cemetery, um… *voice getting louder* Hands! Hands! Everywhere!!

By now you’re probably thinking to yourself, easyise, hands don’t just crawl what are you talking about? You would be correct.

Um- SPIDERS! FUCKING SPIDERS! DRACULARACHNIDS THE SIZE OF MY FUCKING HAND!!!

So after pissing myself and driving home, uh- I came home and looked it up on the internet and found exactly what it was I saw.

*Louder voice but not quite yelling* And here it is fam! Uh people like to call ‘em golden silk orb weaver *voice getting louder* but I like to call them NIGHTMARE FUEL DIPPED IN YELLOW FUCKING PAINT.

*Yelling* YOU SEE THE UNHOLY SIZE OF- THERE IS NOTHING AMAZING ABOUT THAT ON YOUR FACE!!

WHAT KIND OF ALIEN VS PREDATOR SCP SATAN SHIT-

IS THAT ONE EATING A FUCKING BIRD?!?!

THIS THING IS LIKE VOLDEMORT FUCKED A DEMAGORGON BUT SURE LET’S PUT IT ON A GREETING CARD!!!

*In a incredulous tone* SATAN DOESN’T EXIST?!?! THEN WHY WAS I MET WITH A FOREST-FUL OF THIS SHIT?

CHECKMATE ATHEISTS!

[Caption End]

I have an addiction.

MAKE ME CHOOSE → Jennifer Lawrence as Mystique or  Rebecca Romijn as Mystique

The joke started with: “Nightcrawler, what do your Elf eyes see?” and just sorta got away from me after that.

Comedy GOLD - Staged: Ep 2

Art by Eevien Tan

Favorite annotations in my new trumpet part

let’s stop kidding ourselves, we all know the true otp is Jedediah and Octavius from Night At the Museum 

they quote gay movies

they watch cat videos on youtube 

they take selfies

I’m pretty sure they actually became canon in NatM3? 

come on there’s no way you can’t ship them

we’re only limited by our imaginations, comrades