I Swear To God, Rory Culkin Is My Vice

PLEASE someone request something smutty with charlie I NEED TO WRITE FOR HIM

THIS BUT SCHLATT

🫠🥵🥹☠️😈

omg this has been sitting in my inbox for so fucking long i’m so sorry i don’t deserve yall! but anywho

i feel like this would have to be him after getting home from like recording a chuckle sandwich episode at ted’s or something. like he’s been gone for more than an hour so OF COURSE he misses you so much and being in you.

and as soon as he gets home he runs to the bedroom and like swan dives into the bed- and you end up sitting there like that for an hour silently enjoying each other company while you scroll on your phone <3

until he inevitably gets too horny and bored and rails the shit out of you

Oh look more dumbass quotes but instead its just a compilation of me and my siblings being shitheads

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Masky: WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT CAN'T YOU SEE IM EATING A CHEESE CAKE DEPRESSINGLY??!?!?!?

Y/n: I WANT YOU TO ACTUALLY SEE A THERAPIST YOU CHEESECAKE EATING FUCKER-

_______________________________________

Jeff,liu(sully actually) and sally went shopping and are returning back

Sully: WHAT THE FUCK JEFF YOU ALMOST CRASHED INTO THE MANSION

Masky comes out of the house

Masky: ARE YOU SHITHEADS DUMB??? YOU ALMOST FUCKING CRASHED INTO THE MANSION

Jeff: sorry dude but wanna know smth? I don't give a shit also i think the kid got smth to say

Sally: I don't care either!

Masky: YOU-

Sully : IM NOT WITH THEM I STG BUT I WOULD LOVE TO WATCH JEFF GET BEATEN SO INVITE ME WHEN YOU TELL THE OPERATOR

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Ej is listening to chemical romance

Jeff whispering to ben: look at that fucking emo i bet he still has pictures of his ex

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Ben: sorry i was eating cheerios on the bathroom

Hoodie: you mean in?

Y/n: nope i was in the attic with him we watched the office

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x-virus and y/n are shopping

Y/n: omg cody look

Points at a box of nerds

Y/n: it's you!

X-virus digs through the shopping cart y/n was pushing pulls out a box of y/n's fav candy and throws it across the aisle hitting a stranger that was facing the shelves

X-virus: come on you introverted fuck tell that stranger it was your fault

Y/n: satan fears you

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Ok that's all lmao looking back we do cuss alot ig it's our platonic love language

It'll be up sometime this week ;)

dilf!schlatt with young adult!reader who babysits his daughter every weekend while he’s out on business trips. dilf!schlatt who starts to notice how good of a parent you would be to his sweet little girl. dilf!schlatt making up excuses for you to come over his house and spend the night. dilf!schlatt railing the shit out of you after you put his daughter to bed and him covering your mouth with his hand in order to keep you quiet.

sorry i’m very tired and very horny and i haven’t stopped thinking about this :)

YES OH MY GOD IMMEDIATELY! I am 100 percent doing this right now. This is only part one ;)

Warnings: Basically just one use of "fucking"

Part 2 coming soon...

Midnight Babysitting

You were startled awake by a phone ringing. Schlatt. He was the only one who could be calling you at 11 pm. Whether it was to tell him what to read to her, or coming over because he just couldn't get her to eat her dinner, it had to be him.

Of course, he was the only one whose house you would visit at 11 pm as well.

"Hello?" You didn't realize just how groggy you sounded until you spoke.

"Hey, I'm really sorry to be calling you this late, but Lily won't go to bed. I've tried everything and she just won't stop talking about you so I had to call you." The fake guilt just pouring from his lips as he continued.

"Yeah, no problem, I can come help."

"Are you sure? Because I can keep trying if you wa-"

"J, you called me at eleven, woke me up, and arent expecting me to come? You must be out of your fucking mind. I'll be there in ten."

Made it a gif <3

DONT FUCKING DO THIS TO ME RN

NOOOO I JUST GOT A NOTIFICATION THAT SAID “Gabriel is waiting” CUZ ITS ON MY WATCHLIST

IM SORRY GABE IM SO SORRY

I PROMISE I STILL LOVE YOU I DIDNT LEAVE YOU

what is y’all’s favorite tumblr mood color thingy

Please add me to your tag list for all scream posts 💖

IVE BEEN WANTING TO MAKE ONE OF THOSE! Absolutely <3 (Reply to this post if you want to be added too :))

100 posts!

Goddamn already? Weow

love you kai ur the best<33

EEEE

Everytime you show up in my inbox I squeal just a lil