The Boys From Mystic Messenger Would Never Treat Me Like This.

Okay but Loki helping the reader with their self esteem is something I need

self-esteem was something you had always struggled with

it didn’t matter how many tricks you tried, how much time you spent convincing yourself that you were better than your mind was making you believe

you just couldn’t seem to get yourself to budge on the matter

and most of the times, you could deal with it

with self-deprecating humor and bad jokes

but sometimes things got to be a little much

and it would just weigh a little bit too heavily on you

and you’d get a little down about

just sort of keep to yourself, not want to talk to anyone

Loki knew it was something you struggled with

and was always willing to sit with you and talk you down

and just be there for you until you were feeling a little better

Loki would always, without fail, have a pep talk ready for you

after making sure you were bundled up nice and warm in a blanket

with your favorite warm drink

and your favorite snack

“I understand you’re feeling a little self-conscious right now, and really don’t want to have the focus on yourself, and that’s okay. That is completely alright. I’ll keep it short and sweet, and then we’ll watch dumb cat videos. The only catch is that you have to listen and not disagree, alright?”

and you look at them a little suspiciously, unsure what they’re going to say

but nod

mostly because you know Loki won’t let the matter just go away

and Loki nods, as well

“I think you’re a wonderful person. I think you’re funny, and smart, and so very, very brave. You don’t give yourself enough credit for everything you’ve been through, for everything that you’re willing to do. You’re strong. You’re an asset to this team, and everyone loves having you here. You are worth so much more than you believe, and if I have to tell you that every day, I will if it means you might start to believe it. I’ll leave it at that, for now, but just know that I love and care for you, a lot. We all do.”

and you’d already been on the verge of tears

and this certainly didn’t help matters

and you end up sniffling

and rubbing at your eyes with a fist

and when you speak, it’s in a quiet little voice

“Thanks, Loki… That really means a lot.”

and Loki can tell you just need a hug

so they go to sit next to you

and just wrap you up in a warm hug

“Anytime, Y/N.”

you never make it to the cat videos

but that’s okay

because you’re actually feeling okay and happy and warm

and that is far more important

living in my head rent free

Hii! I don’t know if you still take requests, also I’ve never ever really requested anything. What would you say about the prompt "I'm sorry, I just really need a hug right now." With avenger Bucky? Just a comfort bubble with Bucky to brighten up a cloudy day, that’s what I see here. Or a cheer up after a miserable mission that went sideways. Just anything to get a hug from Bucky. It’s just a suggestion though, no pressure! Sending love ❤️

M, I loved the plot. I love writing fluff for our grumpy supersoldier <3

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x F!Reader

Summary: He thinks that the world owes him this—a safe haven. A special place that's only his, and that never fails to make everything fade to white noise. When Bucky is having bad days now, all he needs to do is find comfort in your arms.

A/n: Feedback is really important to me. Tell me what you think and I’ll adore ya forever :)

Word count: 1.1k

Warning(s): I also do not allow for my work to be copied, translated, or re-uploaded anywhere else.

Main Masterlist | Marvel Masterlist 

Send me a prompt + Character!

ㅤㅤㅤ — getting used to receiving —

His dark days used to be cold and lonely.

Not just any type of cold—the permeating one which sinks into your bones like leeches sink their teeth in whatever they find. Bucky used to feel so cold all of the time, that he grew used to it. In both lives, before and after the fall, his days which were not so good always felt like that: the old and uncomfortable tinge of ice in his veins.

Now, there's you, and nothing brings him more warmth than the way you put him in his embrace.

When he comes back from the mission, it's all he wants.

Therapy. Avengers. Captain America.

(Winter Solider. White wolf. Bucky Barnes. Sgt?)

Sometimes, Bucky finds himself.

Other times, he disassociates, uses punching bags in Sam's basement, drinks with Yori, and even cries now.

Being alive is exhausting, but sometimes, Bucky finds himself and something beautiful as well:

The sight of the Shield which means so much to him in the right hands.

People being good. Forgiving.

The exquisite joy a good food that melts on the tongue brings—those little things that are beautiful and make life worth living are his favorite bits, and the ones he holds onto.

(His therapist is proud of him. What a wild concept, he thinks.)

Still.

Through all of the colorful things piercing the white noise, the favorite beautiful thing he's found while being alive in this 21st century is undoubtedly you.

When you open the door for him, Bucky thinks thank fucking god.

I'm home.

Your hand leaves the doorknob and your arms open wide, and that single image is the reason why he smiled more times these few months than he has in years.

"Hey, you," you say.

His two favorite words.

Bucky throws his duffel bag somewhere behind you and then steps into your embrace.

It's all he wants a lot of the time.

After missions — especially the hard ones like this one they're still stuck on — is everything he wants and craves.

Something about the way you hold him is holy to Bucky.

He's aware that love is supposed to be such a strong, gripping feeling—the drowning sense of peace in being with a person, but you terrified him at first with that power.

The one to bring him peace.

Your arms fit around Bucky's shoulders and in his arms, you melt. Always. As if he was a hot pan and you were butter, your body becomes as relaxed as it can be, surrendering inside both his warm and cold cage.

It terrified him the first time Bucky felt you so comfortable in this position.

You had laid your head on his chest for so long on the couch that his heart had started to pound right where you laid.

"Doesn't—isn't the metal arm a little... uncomfortable? For this?"

"Nope," you said. Softly. Sleepy.

"Oh." He was surprised. He'd always imagined it was. "Okay."

"Never been comfier," you mumbled. Bucky's heart had lept because something told him not only your words were true, but that you were almost asleep.

Since that day, it was here that Bucky liked spending a lot of precious time.

Whenever you hugged him, Bucky was able to think about only the good bits.

Whether he was holding you more or you holding him like right now, fitting your bodies like a puzzle became his founding pillar for peace.

(Sam had even joked about it.

"Dude. You look so chill lately," he had laughed.

"Do I?" Bucky asked, deadpanned.

"Look! Not even now—man, the corner of your mouth just quivered tryin' to be funny about this," he had laughed. "This is golden."

Inevitably, Bucky joined him in laughter. "I'm glad you're entertained."

"Oh, I'm more than entertained," said Sam. "I'm happy for you.")

Bucky felt you sighing against his chest, slowly.

Then, he felt your cute nose nudging his neck, right below the ear.

He chuckled—little wolf.

In probably two seconds, you'd make a comment about—

"You smell like dust," you sounded whiny, but then the feeling of a kiss blooms on that spot of his neck, and Bucky's brain goes even a little quieter. "It's ok. We'll shower."

"Will we?" he asks, interest peaking. You laugh at him, but now with the offer on the table, Bucky switches his plans of cooking you dinner and asking you to update him on the last episodes of the series you were talking to him about over the phone. He picks you up by your thighs, laughing at the squeal that comes out of you. "Alright. Let's go."

"Bucky!"

"What?" He plays dumb, kicking the door behind him with his foot. "You don't wanna shower with me?"

You laugh at him, and Bucky leans his head to get a kiss from you. "I'll cook for us later."

Mouth still touching his, your words come off muffled by both the kisses and the smile. "I've been waiting—hm—for your food for—weeks."

"And you'll get it," he switches to place one last kiss on your neck, then pays attention to hold you right as he switches your weight onto only his metal arm so he can open the bathroom door. "Shower first. I don't wanna see those little faces of yours every time you get your nose on me. They distract me, and the kitchen is not—"

"—a place to be distracted," you join him, holding on for dear life on his neck. "I know."

As if I'd let my most precious thing drop, he rolls his eyes internally.

Bucky gets inside the bathroom but still keeps you in his arm for just a moment longer. He likes to hold you in any way he can. "Let's shower. Then food. Then more hugs on the couch 'cause I need to tell you some stuff, then..." he lets his words drift off, and shrugs his shoulders.

You shake your head, smiling at him. "Coy comes out as a terribly smug look on you, and you know that."

"You love it," he says, pressing a kiss to your mouth as he lets you down gently.

"I do. Love every bit of you," you say, a little shy as you always are when telling him cheesy things.

(If the world could only see the nasty, filthy things you say with a smile on your face.)

He holds your face in his hand and kisses you a little more. He missed being able to do that. "I love you more, angel."

You fought him on it, but Bucky liked to believe he was right.

And it would always make him smile to think you also believed your words.

🏷 b.b. tag list ☆ @undiadeestos ; @keepingitlokiii ; @hallecarey1 ; @mardema ; @mollygetssherlockcoffee ; @justlovelifeblog ; @fallenoutofrose ; @rvgrsbrns ; @tripletstephaniescp ; @mal-edictions-blog ; @rippl3s ; @barnesafterglow ; @vintagepigeon ; @dirtyweenerking ; @couldabeenamermaid ; @winter-soldier-sebstan ; @leyannrae ; @nerdwholikesword ; @andreead ; @ren-ni ; @pastamomma ; @fiftyshadesofokay ; @peonyophelia ; @murdermornings ; @bvckysmoon ; @buttybarnes1917 ; @rebekahdawkins ; @tylard-blog1 ; @xbeauxny ; @fandoms-writings ; @thatblondebrownie ; @carrotfantasimp ; @teenagedreams-bucky ; @buckspumpkin ; @sltwins ; @i-beg-your-pardon-laufeyson ; @mrsbarnesinmyimagination ; @pineprincess ; @cpag7 ; @iambeeee ; @sstan-hoe ; @weirdowithnobeardo ; @hdbngsprnva ; @itsdawnashlie ; @sweetdreamsbuck ; @slutforsteve ; @maladaptivexxdaydreaming ; @holl2712 ♡

Dating the Amazing Spider-Man would include...

When he tells you that he’s Spider-Man, it’s a shock, sure, but not something you’d run away or hide from. He’s glad to have told you, he always hated hiding it from you and lying. After he told you and explained things, he promised that he’d never hide anything else from you.

You worry about him a lot. You’ve seen him when he returns from a fight all battered and bruised so naturally, you worry about whether or not the next fight will be the last one. Peter tries to ease your worries by texting and calling as much as he can when out on patrol to ease some of those worries.

Text from Peter: Hey! I’m okay, currently sitting on the top of the Empire State building. I’m being careful I promise. Since I had to leave before we could watch the end of the movie, how about I swing by and pick up your favourite meal from the pizza place in Brooklyn? Would that make it up to you? I love you!

He sends you selfies from the most ridiculous and terrifying heights which make you laugh but also scare you a little bit.

He’s protective of you, sure, but he’s terrified that you might end up getting hurt because of him. It actually nearly broke the two of you up earlier in the relationship because your safety was compromised and he blamed himself. You never once blamed him and forgave him instantly but you’ve had to teach him about forgiving himself. He carries the weight of the world on those broad shoulders of his so it’s reminding him that you’re a team and reminding him that it’s okay to move on and forgive himself.

“I’d rather die than have you get hurt, (y/n)! I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if someone else got hurt because of me!”

The first time he takes you for a swing across New York, you’re terrified because first you think you’re going to be too heavy for him to carry and two, you’re terrified of the prospect. He reassures you that he can carry you, he’s super strong remember?, and he promises he won’t drop you. You cling to him the entire time, barely opening your eyes to look, but you survive! He reassures you the entire time, telling you that he’s got you and he’ll keep you safe and he does exactly that.

Aunt May just adores you. She sees your kindness and she can see just by looking at him how much Peter loves you. Whenever she’s inviting Peter to come round, you always get an invite too. Peter jokes that Aunt May likes you more than she likes him.

Aunt May enjoys gossiping with you, telling you about what Peter was like as a little boy, telling you all of the embarrassing stories.

She also pulls Peter aside at one point and whispers, “Your Uncle Ben would’ve loved (y/n). Your parents would love them as well.”

He’s spontaneous and will whisk you away for a swing through New York and a picnic atop a building in the middle of the city. He’ll drop by your work during your lunch break and will take you to enjoy your lunch somewhere with a better view than your work’s staff room.

The two of you have so much fun together. He’s your best friend and that means that you can authentically be your silliest selves around the other without a care or without judgement. You dance around the kitchen singing your Elvis impressions full pelt, you play hide and seek in pretty much every large department store you visit because why not? There’s just so much laughter in your relationship with Peter and you adore it.

Peter isn’t afraid to show you his sensitive side or his vulnerable side. There’s been a lot of times where he’s had nightmares about his parents or Uncle Ben or about the horrors of villains he’d fought and you’re the one who consoles him, wrapping him in blankets and giving him tea and temple kisses. He puts himself under a lot of stress and it’s you that helps him unpack all of that trauma.

Sometimes, particularly when he’s having those nightmares or going through a rough patch, you need to remind him to take care of himself. You’re the one who makes the meals and almost forces the plate into his hand to eat it instead of eating processed junk. You’re the one who gets in the shower with him, scrubbing the grime, dirt and blood of him, washing his hair and leaving little kisses on his collarbone. You’re the one who always packs a water bottle and snacks in his backpack for when he’s going out on patrol just so you know that he’s got something to eat and drink.

He leaves notes for you everywhere. Notes on scrap pieces of paper, written in the corners of the newspapers, scribbled at the bottom of your notebook. Little notes to remind you how much he cares and how much he loves you.

Scribbled on a receipt and shoved in your book you were currently reading was a note that said, ‘When you read this I hope you smile, I love your smile.

Stuck on your phone after he came home late one night was, ‘You look freaking adorable when you sleep. You’re snoring and it’s the cutest sound possible. Don’t ever apologise for being you.’

His computer background and phone background are photos of you. The one on his phone is a candid photo of you laughing that you hate but he loves because he loves that smile of yours. His computer background is a photo of the two of you at one of your family members weddings. 

Peter always kind of knew that he wanted to marry you. After one and a half years of dating, Aunt May gives Peter his mother’s old engagement ring. It’s simple but beautiful and it holds a lot of meaning. Peter carries it with him, he’s not sure when he’ll ask you but he carries it with him every single day just waiting for the right moment.

Peter always know what to say to make you weak at the knees. It’s like he has a bank of the most beautiful things to say to make you giggle and blush like a teenager.

He loves to kiss you. He kisses you everywhere; forehead, temple, nose, wrists, knuckles, shoulder, neck, tummy, lips… Given half the chance, he’d kiss you all day every day. He just loves to kiss you.

He smells like coffee, chocolate and woodsy. He usually drinks coffee constantly to keep awake during the long nights, the chocolate is usually a snack from his backpack that you’ve packed and the woodsy scent is from how much he’s outdoors and in about nature.

He’s not afraid to show people that he loves you. He’s always holding your hand or hugging you or proclaiming his love to you in the middle of the street. If it made you uncomfortable, he would stop but he would literally serenade you (and he has done in the past after a few too many drinks).

He’s very chill, he’s very low pressure so if you’re not feeling up to doing something, he doesn’t mind. He wants you to be comfortable so however he can help and whatever he can do to make you comfortable, he’ll do it. He doesn’t make you feel bad for it either.

Peter celebrates every single win with you no matter how big or small. He’s so proud of you and just wants you to know that so even if it’s something simple like you managed to figure out something in work or you managed to nail the recipe for those cookies that you’d been trying to perfect all week, he’ll celebrate and be so proud of you.

After a hard fight, you’re the one that patches him up, helps him shower and gives him a massage. You’ll tend to him and his wounds and make sure that he’s okay physically and mentally.

He makes you feel like the sexiest and most beautiful person alive. He could compliment you for hours as he looks into your eyes. He kisses you with so much passion that it makes you forget about everything. He worships you and your body, kissing you everywhere. He would spend hours making you feel good, making you orgasm over and over before he even thought about pleasuring himself. Sometimes, maybe after a hard fight, he’s rougher and more desperate, skipping the foreplay and just desperate to feel you. Most often though, he takes his time, teasing you and praising you. He makes you feel so unbelievably good, better than you ever thought you could feel.

“You’re doing so good.” “You feel so good.” “Where do you want me to touch you now, princess?” 

You’ve totally had sex whilst he’s wearing the Spider-Man costume/hood at least once. Hell, maybe you’ve even worn it too.

He’s taller than you so the height difference when hugging him standing up is just *chefs kiss*. It also means that he can reach for the stuff you can’t get because you’re too short.

He has so many nicknames for you. He makes a new nickname or pet name up every day pretty much. Some are funny, some are cute and some can never hear the light of day again.

You sleep wrapped around each other, cuddled right into each other’s skin. He loves sleeping with your head on his chest, it makes him feel like he’s protecting you and keeping you safe. He also enjoys being the little spoon. He’s versatile.

You want to steal his clothes but he’s a pretty lean dude so what he does is he buys sweatshirts in a larger size and wears them before gifting them to you so not only are they size appropriate for you, they also smell just like him. He never once judges you for your size or shape or weight, in fact he praises you.

Am I the only one that doesn’t think Loki is narcissistic? I think he craves atttention because he doesn’t have enough. He feels neglected and tries to make things about himself to attract attention. In the scene where Loki explains his theory to Mobius, he looks like an excited puppy. He is so excited for the possibility that maybe for once he’s right. That behaviour is something that is very common in neglected children. Sif says to Loki that he is alone and always will be alone. His whole life he had no real friends and the only person that ever believed in him was Frigga. He was always overlooked and lived in the shadows of Thor’s greatness. Loki said that he hurts people as a part of the illusion for a desperate attempt at having the control that he has never had. A narcissist would never be able to admit this and would not even believe it. Narcissism by definition is the pursuit of gratification from vanity or egotistic admiration of one's idealised self-image and attributes. We know that this is not Loki because from what we’ve seen throughout the mcu is that he does not think of himself as amazing. He is self-critical and insecure. Throughout his lifetime, he has been told over and over again that he is not enough and I think that he may say “I am a god” and “I am burdened with glorious purpose” to convince himself and others that he is great. Loki is not narcissistic, he hides his insecurities behind a shield that resembles narcissism.

Edit: I realize now that this post is a bit ableist and I’m really sorry if I offended anyone. I didn’t realize it was ableist when I posted it.

Loki Cuddling HCs

This can be platonic or romantic

He loves cuddling you, that's not debatable

He is a big spoon, and watch out cause this mf has a death grip on you

He will treat you like his personal teddy bear

Sometimes when he feels insanely touch-starved he will pick you from wherever you are and drag you to his room to cuddle

Sometimes when he really doesn't want you to leave he will lay on top of you and he knows since he is too heavy you can't go anywhere.

(this might escalate to a hostage situation) its like having a cat on your lap once they're on your lap you legally aren't allowed to move

If you happen to pass out while cuddling, he will make sure no one disturbs you and then pass out with you

Even while he rests he will keep that toddler with a piece of your hair grip on you

Forehead kisses

He will wrap you in the warmest blankets

Be prepared to be in a blanket burrito during the winter

Modern Art

tasm!peter x fem!reader

summary: inspired by Reckless by Madison Beer and All Too Well. Angst because all of us have pain kink (yes I'm looking at you.) requested by @buckyjbarneswhore | masterlist

Peter had fallen in love with you even before asking you out. It wasn't much of a surprise, that boy was always a hopeless romantic.

He loved the way you laughed, loved how he made you laugh. He loved how you hummed the songs he never understood, your voice, your kindness, how you doodled nonsense on his papers, how you hugged Aunt May whenever you saw her — he loved anything and everything about you.

Then one day, he went to Oscorp. You knew he saw something there, but he wasn't keen on saying what it was.

That was the first secret he hid from you.

You thought you were imagining things. Sure, he didn't spend much time with you anymore, but he was busy. You told yourself he was busy even though the two of you had the same classes and the same workload.

You ignored the feeling at the back of your head, the one that told you to be careful.

————

"Hey, we're going to a party tonight. Wanna come?" Aimee asked, smiling wide. "Trick question. You have to."

"Then I guess I'll be there." You returned a smile, knowing you didn't need much persuasion anyway. You didn't have much work and anything's better than sitting around doing nothing.

"I need to do a beer count. Is Peter going to be there?" she asked, taking out the little pink notebook she carried around. You had gifted it to her on her birthday and she hasn't parted with it since.

"He's uh, busy." You were suddenly interested in the book in front of you.

"Oh man, you're dating Peter Parker?" One of your other friends, Mark, looked up from whatever he was reading.

"Yeah, why?"

"No reason. He's a chill dude. Saw him yesterday. He bought me coffee at Helsey's after I was drunk off my ass," Mark said, laughing. "Owes me skateboard lessons too."

"Wait, wait," you sat up straighter. "Helsey's cafe is near your house."

"Of course it is."

"Your house is nowhere near the public library."

"Okay...?"

"Peter said he was at the library," you said, sounding worried. "He said he had a personal project or something."

"Why would he lie?" Aimee asked, closing the pink notebook.

"C'mon guys, you're overthinking this," Mark interrupted swiftly. "In fact, I'm pretty sure his friend mentioned something about going to the library too!"

"His friend? He was with someone?" you asked, trying to sound casual.

"Yeah, Gwen Stacy."

————

"I'm thinking we should go to that little restaurant they opened up?" Peter asked, handing over the flowers he had hurriedly bought on his way over. "Sort of as an apology for my absence the whole week?"

"I'm not feeling good. I'd rather stay inside," you said, hoping you sounded normal. You put the flowers in an empty vase and threw the bag into the bed, then opened your laptop.

Peter frowned. He had off days too, when he wanted nothing more than to disconnect from the entire world for a while, but your demeanor said something was wrong.

You running through whatever you're looking for on the laptop and ignoring your boyfriend standing awkwardly near the door was the closest thing you had done to giving him the cold shoulder.

"Are you mad at me?" he asked, sitting down on your bed.

You laughed forcefully. "Don't be ridiculous, Peter. Why would I be mad at you?"

"I mean, if you are- that's totally justified. I know I wasn't the most attentive guy last week. I blame it on my project—"

"Speaking of," you interrupted cheerfully, slamming the laptop shut and turning to him. "What's this project about?"

He was taken back. "Uhm, arachnology."

"Arachnology?"

"Yes?"

"That sounds like a question."

"I mean, yes. Definitely," he said, nodding. "I'm researching on arachnology. Why the sudden interest?"

"I feel bad for not knowing what's going on in your life." You replied, waving it off.

You had hoped he was a better liar, just so you could comfort yourself that it was all okay like your rose-colored glasses made it out to be. Apparently not.

"I appreciate that." Peter held your gaze, both of you knowing there was something more. Something he wasn't saying.

"Are you doing the research with Gwen Stacy?" The question had slipped off your mouth before you could think about it. He seemed even more surprised.

"Why would I study spiders with Gwen?" he laughed, not meeting your eyes.

The way her name fell from his lips said he knew her, and the affection behind it said he was fond of her. You bit down your lips and told yourself that you were being crazy. Friends care for each other, and you needn't worry about that.

If there was something going on, Peter's not the type to hide it. Then again, you thought he wasn't the type to lie at all, but isn't that what he just did?

————

The story wrote itself from there. So now here you are, alone at your birthday party, having everyone around you but him. You were pretty sure he had forgotten about it altogether.

When everyone left for home, you went to your room and swallowed the resentment. It felt like a statement on his part. He used to write little notes for you during class, with small lines that made you smile even though they were sappy. He said he'll never hurt you, but here you are, close to tears on your own birthday.

There was a knock on the window.

You didn't need to turn to know it was him.

"Hey, I got us pizzas!" he said energetically, then noticed your red gown, the slumped shoulders, the irregular breaths. "Y/N...?"

You turned around, wiping the first tear that had shamelessly slid down your face. The last thing you wanted to do was look broken in front of the man who broke you.

He took in your makeup, or rather the smudged edges of it. You looked so utterly strong yet cautious, as if you had just built a brick wall over your emotions.

"Oh!" he connected the dots, leaving the pizza on the bedside. "Your birthday- holy shit, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry—"

"Where were you?" you asked calmly.

He blanked. What was he supposed to say now? That he was so consumed with a bogus research that he forgot his girlfriend's birthday? Or the truth? Both would hurt the same.

"Gwen Stacy," you said the name slowly. "Why did you tell me you don't know her?"

He took a deep breath in. "I didn't say that. I just didn't tell you she was just doing the research with me—"

"If that was the case, why did you lie?"

"I thought you wouldn't understand! If I told you I had something super important to research with another girl, especially my childhood crush, don't tell me you wouldn't have gotten jealous!"

"Fuck you, Parker," your voice rose louder. "You know I'm not that type of overprotective partner. You know you could have just told me. But you didn't. Why?"

"There's a lot of compli—"

"Why?" The word ricocheted off the walls, making Peter almost take a step back.

"Did you cheat on me?" you whispered, biting down your lips so you wouldn't yell again.

"No," he shook his head far too quickly. Yet he looked guilty. You quickly connected the dots.

"Are you in love with her anyway?"

Peter's face fell. "I didn't plan to."

Tears freely started to fall now, but you didn't care. You took a deep breath in.

"You could have told me that from the start."

"I love her now but I loved you first," he said defensively. "I did. But then I was spending more time with Gwen and somewhere along the way, it just happened. I never wanted to hurt you, but would you really blame me for loving someone?"

"You're honestly asking me that?" you asked, your voice shaking. "All I did was love someone and where did that get me?"

"You don't understand—"

"What the fuck don't I understand?"

"I'm Spiderman!" He interrupted, raising his hands in surrender. He began rambling even without seeing your reaction. "Gwen works at Oscorp. She helped me. I knew you wouldn't have approved if I told you I was fighting for my life everyday. Not like she does."

You understood why he was saying that. Peter Parker was in his core, nothing if not kind. He didn't want to deal with how he hurt someone, so he threw a half-assed excuse at your face, hoping you'd agree and let him go. He didn't need your pain on his conscience so he resorted to wallowing through excuses.

Steady breaths, that's what he used to say when you were having a bad day. Steady breaths and a steady mind. Can't be all bad, right? I'm here. And I'm not going anywhere.

Despite everything, you smiled. Steady breaths it is.

"I knew you were Spiderman, I knew it from the start," you said, almost amused.

He blinked, surprised yet again. Maybe he was more stupid than he gave himself credit for. After all, you were his girlfriend. If there was someone in the world who could figure it out, who else would it be if not you?

"You wouldn't have loved me anymore," he finished his ranting, desperately hopeless. "No matter what you say now, you wouldn't have!"

"I would have loved you any way you wanted me to."

He opened his mouth to say something, closed it again, realizing he had just run out of excuses. Nothing to give, nothing that you'll ever trust again.

"I'm sorry," he said, genuinely meaning it. "I'm so fucking sorry that I hurt you. You are a good person and—"

"Get out."

"Let me just-"

"Get the hell out!" you pointed to the window.

He didn't want to cause any more of a mess, so he did as you asked, though hesitant as ever.

And as he climbed that window down one last time, you looked at the vase in the corner, the one which had the flowers he bought for you; all of them completely wilted now.

————————

second and final part here!

————————

join/be removed from taglist here

general taglist: @sometandomstuff333 @cuddleluv @luvelyxp @violetrainbow412-blog @third-broparcelicito @wayvjinsol @dinfarrik @oliveoilthoughts @avengers-is-that-a-band @thankyouforanonymity @imabee-oralizard @agnesamarantheastwood @alexxavicry

marvel taglist: @magicalxdaydream @archangelaurii @vx-vexedvixen @junglxqueen @shyposttree @louderfortheback @garfieldssimp @/bex_tk1 @1999yanira @cinderellacauseshebroke @aleksanderwh0r3 @levylovegood @inu1gf @doodles-bi-tea @tenebrisirae @slutfortasmpeter @wrathspoet @deafeningnightcollection-things @awesomegirl85 @lazysheepperfection @disartrous @triumph-of-form-over-content @undergroundpersephone @thedelusionreaderbitch

andrew!peter: @angelcritterz @greekktragedyy @rophelia @littleredjason @geek-and-proud @arabellelancastersstuff @peachyplumsss @riibuns @lemonjane16 @ionlyeverwantedtobeyourequal @lokismidnight @blooo0ooop @plutoneu @livewittykid @melody-ed @dracoismydramaqueen @clean-and-claire @londonbrandcandy @jenoslov @luvwanda

some places to start if you think you might be a maladaptive daydreamer

the maladaptive daydreaming proposed diagnostic criteria: https://href.li/?https://www.somer.co.il/images/MD/MD_diagnostic_criteria.pdf

link to the MDS (maladaptive daydreaming scale, a 16 part questionnaire to help determine if you could possibly have MaDD): https://href.li/?https://daydreamresearch.wixsite.com/md-research/measures

The International Consortium for Maladaptive Daydreaming Research: https://daydreamresearch.wixsite.com/md-research

Eli Somer’s (the psychologist who “discovered” MaDD) youtube channel: https://www.youtube.com/user/SomerClinic 

Guide to Maladaptive Daydreaming: Overcoming Fantasy Addiction: https://maladaptivedaydreamingguide.wordpress.com/guide/

healthline article on maladaptive daydreaming: https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/maladaptive-daydreaming

ya'll ever see a fanfic synopsis so fucked up you experience the five stages of grief simultaneously and briefly lose the ability to see colour

@itsicarlie on tiktok