Batfamily Shenanigans Pt: 4

Batfamily Shenanigans Pt: 4

Jason reading in the library with a cup of tea.

Tim: Jason

Jason: Mmm?*Sips Tea*

Tim:—Damian put laxatives in your tea this morning for using his favorite China cup.

Jason: *Sips tea all over the floor*

———

Batman at the Watchtower giving a oral debate discussion.

Flash: Bats what’s in your cape?

Batman: What are talking about? *Large lump in his cape on full display.*

Green Lantern (Hal): The massive lump in your cape!

*Cue a 6’2 over 200 lbs of muscle in a red helmet with two large pistols strapped to his thighs.*

Red Hood: Alfred wanted to know if you wanted Herb Crusted Salmon or Chicken Fingers for dinner?

Batman: Chicken tenders will do.

Red Hood turns to the League and waves: Hi Diana

Wonder Woman (warmly): Hello child.

Red Hood leaves, and Batman returns to his conversation.

Hal: *Internally about to combust*

————

Clark: So this is just normal day in the Wayne Residence?

Dick swinging upside from the chandelier, Tim throwing batarangs at Damian who’s chasing him running full force with a sharpie Katana, Cass braiding Bab’s hair while she’s on a FaceTime with Dinah and Helena, and Stephanie and Duke place stickers and sharpie drawing on Jason’s face as he snores loudly.

Bruce while sipping his coffee: Yes it’s just another Tuesday.

————

Dick serving Damian and Duke warm fluffy pancakes and fresh chopped fruits.

Damian: Grayson?

Dick: Yeah, lil Dee?

Damian: Did Pennyworth prepare this?

Dick (confused): No, I did.

Duke:When?

Dick: Just now. Eat up guys it’ll be time for me to take you guys to school soon. *Leaves kitchen whistling*

Duke (whispering): I thought he couldn’t boil water?

Damian: I was told the same information Thomas,I am just as surprised as you.

*Both begin to eat and surprisingly the food is tasty*

Tim:No way Dick made breakfast?!

Duke and Damian both share a confused look.

Duke: Wait so Dick had known how to cook this whole time, then why did you tell me he couldn’t?

Tim with a mouthful of pancakes:Yes it was a lie,I love when Dick cooks and I wanted be the only one to eat it.

Damian and Duke share another look.

Damian:I curse the day of your conception Drake.

Tim: Mhmm, are you gonna eat those?

Damian gives him the rest of his pancakes.

Dick returns to the kitchen dressed for the day: There’s some left, does anyone want seconds?

Tim with syrup all over his face and with a demonic voice: Gove it to me.

Dick,Duke, and Damian:………

————

Superman and Wonder Woman burst into the Batcave.

Superman: We got your destress call,what wrong?

Bruce turns in his chair to look at them: I didn’t issues a destress call.

Wonder Woman:Like Hera you didn’t, we got here as soon as we could.

Dick drops down from the ceiling.

Dick: I summoned you both here.

All: What for?

Alfred arrives with a smug look on his face: Master Dick thought it would be wise for you both to spend the day with Master Bruce he had been quite grumpy as of late.

Bruce: have not.

Dick: Has too.

Clark (chuckling): If you missed us you could have just called.

Bruce(grumpily): I did not.

Diana holding her Lasso in hand: Shall we test that theory?

Alfred clearing his throat:I have taken the liberty of preparing tea along with finger sandwiches and pastries in the sunroom if you both would follow me.

Bruce turns to Dick blankly: why would you do that.

Dick grinning evily: Payback for the Penguin case.

Bruce:That was two months ago.

Dick: I never forget B, remember that. Save a sandwich for me Alfred!

Bruce staring blankly into the cave before getting up and following: I have raised a monster.