MECHANIC ABBY DRABBLES

- you hate fitting that stereotype that women don’t know shit about cars but that stereotype was literally made because of you.

- your car engine was making funny noises, brakes squeaking and oil was very much needed in your poor car.

- you drove to the nearest mechanic and hopped out your little white jetta volkswagen convertible that was all decorated and girly inside, you loved your car but that maintenance had you clueless.

- you saw a girl walk up to you, humongous build, maybe a tiny bit taller than you with huge fucking arms, grease covered her hands, parts of her arms and face. you swore your knees went weak just by looking at her.

“you need help?” she wiped her hands with rag as she looked at you up and down, nodding you head you chirped up “yeah um, my car is making noises” you made a confused face earning a chuckle out of the blonde “what kinda noises sweetie?” she threw the rag on a chair that sat outside, walking up to your car.

“um i’m sorry i kinda don’t know shit about cars” you let out a small giggle before handing her your keys that dangled with a bajillion little trinkets, she got in your car, one leg out the car while she turned it on, revving the engine “ok so..” she got out your car “i can tell something is wrong with it but i do did to give it a diagnosis and it might take an hour or two?” she leaned against the car door.

“oh a diagnosis like a doctor” you partially joked “yeah like a doctor, you can sit in the garage until i figure out what’s wrong” she smiled at you.

- after she fixed your car she literally wanted to slam her head in a wall for not asking for you number.

- lets say a couple weeks later you return back with another issue.

- this time she asks for your number and you happily give it to her, you guys start texting nonstop until she finally asks you out on a date.

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prettywitchybitch

1 year ago

realest i've seen all day

yall ever masturbate so hard you start begging like “fuck-pleasepleaseplease” even though you’re the one fucking yourself? or is that just me.

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prettywitchybitch

3 weeks ago

the word "coitus" is so funny to me i need help

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prettywitchybitch

6 months ago

i screamed and one singular tear of joy rolled down my face.

“I did appreciate your warmth”

What if I tell you I cheered when she got shot

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prettywitchybitch

1 year ago

why do i love this

Thinking About That "can You Watch My Girlfriend" Trend Where People Put A Camera In Front Of Their Partners

thinking about that "can you watch my girlfriend" trend where people put a camera in front of their partners and leave the room, so idk if anyone's already done this but this is how i think the girls would react <3

PALESTINE MASTERPOST, DAILY CLICK, DON'T BUY TLOU

ELLIE

"can you guys watch my girlfriend while i go to the bathroom? just watch her please."

• the look of absolute confusion on ellie's face is peak comedy as she stares at you, brows furrowed and lips slightly parted. she gives you a small "what?"

"babe..." she'd mutter as you walk away.

• she's like a lost puppy and it's absolutely adorable omg. she looks straight at the camera for a few, long, silent seconds, then glances back in the direction where you left, then back again at the camera.

• don't ask me why i think she'd be awkward, i just do.

• something about being recorded for some reason that escapes her makes her uncomfortable idk

• but!!! after some time a lot she gets over the initial shyness and instead starts talking about random stuff

"i bought this new videogame... it's like, fighting? but in space?" okay she's still kinda awkward, "it's actually very complicated but it's so cool dude... yeah..." the sheepish smile that appears on her face will definitely make her cringe when you show her the video.

• also she might tell one of her puns.

• the relief she feels when you come back lmao poor girl was STRESSED

ABBY

• okay i see her as being more concerned and confused than awkward.

"can you guys watch my girlfriend for a moment?"

• she lifts her eyebrows and follows your figure as you leave the room, "watch me? who? for what?"

• the pout on her lips while she just sits there and stares at the camera as if it could give her answers.

"i guess we just wait..." she just goes back to whatever she was doing before you interrupted her

• she occasionally glances at the camera and rolls her shoulders or tilts her head to the side (kinda checking herself and her muscles out but she'll deny it till the day she dies)

• when you come back, her big, cute eyes light up. "where'd you go?"

DINA

• we all know that girl has personality. she's the most extroverted out of the three and doesn't mind being in front of the camera in the slightest.

"can you guys watch my girlfriend? i'll be right back."

• she'd ask a perplexed "what am i supposed to do?" but when she gets no answer from you, she just improvises.

• the charming smile she flashes at the camera, the way she fixes her hair, she's so at ease like the queen that she is.

"hello guys! man, i look pretty good today."

• she'd probably start pretending to be in a youtube video.

"okay, i ordered this amazing pasta the other day, it's from a new italian restaurant not far from here and everything was so good. oh, and then we went to—"

• she'll just talk until you come back lmao

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prettywitchybitch

11 months ago

nothing is worse than reading and nothing is worse than not reading

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prettywitchybitch

1 year ago

4K notes View Post

prettywitchybitch

1 year ago

Unfortunately this is funny as hell

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prettywitchybitch

4 months ago

what is it with all of the bigots suddenly coming out on the vi, caitlyn and sevika x reader tags??? why cant men just stay out of places they dont belong?? 😫

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prettywitchybitch

1 year ago

BOXER ELLIE PLS SAVE ME BOXER ELLIE PLS SAVE ME BOXER ELLIE PLS SAVE ME BOXER ELLIE PLS SAVE ME BOXER ELLIE PLS SAVE ME BOXER ELLIE PLS SAVE ME BOXER ELLIE PLS SAVE ME BOXER ELLIE PLS SAVE ME BOXER ELLIE PLS SAVE ME I NEED BOXER ELLIE I DEVOUR BOXER ELLIE.

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prettywitchybitch

4 months ago

No one said men can’t want jinx x male reader fics, the problem is that they go whining in sapphic spaces abt it and then they blame women as if we need to cater to their every need.

Like boy pls go away somewhere with that mess, you are a grown man, write your own damn fic. Or you too much of a bunch of man babies to do something as simple as that?

Like i understand wanting more x male reader fics for Jinx BUT FOR VI? CAITLYN? ELLIE? LADY DIMITRESCU? Boy those are CANON lesbians ofc no sane person will write x male reader fics for them.

Conclusion: Stop being man children and instead of crying to sapphic blogs go write your own damn fic!

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