Defending My New Favorite Ship Again Because Why Tf Not

Hear me out. Falmer/Dwemer Ghoulcy!

One of my favourite things is getting to see Chinese students trying to learn English at school finally being able to shake English speakers and yell "WHY IS YOUR LANGIAGE LIKE THIS????"

Also, another flaming hot take, but it kind of irritates me when people put Halsin confessing his feelings to you on the same level as Mizora literally trying to use you to mess with your companions, I see so many comics with people using that as a joke and like...no??? Mizora is literally a manipulative monster and an abuser who is trying to use you to mess with your friends and feed her ego. Her coming on to you has everything to do with wanting to hurt Wyll (because sleeping with his abuser is absolutely betraying him whether you are romancing him or not) and sow dissention in your group (because your love interest will generally be upset). Halsin is literally pouring his heart out to you because he trusts you and he accepts rejection gracefully, sorry you're not attracted to men, that's 100% okay but it doesn't mean your bad faith freak out is canonically accurate. Sorry if you're attracted to men but just not Halsin, that's also valid, but it doesn't make him a creep for expressing his feelings and gracefully accepting your rejection. Believe it or not, it is 100% okay to not be attracted to someone and just move on when they politely accept that an apologize. Stop being weird.

I've come to describing it as: What we need to find out if we'd want sex with someone is what others complain of as "friendzoning" (aka You must be this friend zoned to have a chance to go on this demisexual ride). Which is NOT an endorsement of being friends in hopes of getting sex. No one owes anyone sex. No one should be friends with an ulterior motive. But it's hard to describe demisexuality without finding an anchor point to something we live with in society. And all too frequently, I've experienced how swiftly friends stop being friends when sex is confirmed to be off the table. Friendly greetings turn cold, plans become empty promises, and laughter becomes silence when you're not interested in sex. How do people find anyone willing to do that attractive enough to fuck?

Sex without attachment is far more prevalent I think than society is willing to acknowledge. Otherwise, we wouldn't have jokes about sex on the third date, the shame of friendzoning, the "expiration date" theme as we age, or the dreaded "frigid" label. There'd never be emphasis of "If you liked it, ya shoulda put a ring on it", "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?" And all sorts of "fun" colloquialisms that imply that the temptation of sex is present without the urge to commit to a relationship. Because, why caution others in acquiring commitment first if it's in our nature to only want sex when there are emotional bonds?

Ironically, I think we ought to be de-stigmatizing casual sex and instead be emphasizing consent, safety for health and generally not being a douche to your partners. I get the sense that this sex shaming causes a kind of sociopathic treatment of each other if we're not doing it for the "right" reasons (insert disclaimer about appropriate age being needed to discuss this topic), because it doesn't take long before I'm hearing a tone of disrespect towards anyone who likes casual sex as though they're unworthy of marriage material.

demisexuality can be so hard to explain because it’s misconstrued as you just wanting to trust the other person before you have sex with them. and I get why the misconception happens. But demisexuality differs in that there isn’t sexual attraction at all before that bond forms.

I think what people have difficulty with is the idea that there are people out there who aren’t experiencing sexual attraction at all until a certain point, if ever, because we’re taught that sex, libido, and sexual attraction are all the same, both in and out of queer spaces.

And when you’re learning about asexuality and demisexuality, you may learn that people have romantic and aesthetic attraction separately from sexual attraction, and that sexual and romantic attraction aren’t necessarily intertwined, and that may challenge your worldview on sex.

But “I trust you enough to have sex with you” isn’t the same as “I’m not sexually attracted to anyone but you, and the reason I’m sexually attracted to you now after we’ve established this close bond is literally because of the bond of trust we’ve been able to form”.

It’s easy to see how those can get conflated. On the surface, if you’re unfamiliar with asexuality, they may sound the same. But it’s important to acknowledge the difference between “no sex until I trust you” and “no sexual attraction unless I trust you and maybe not even then”.

Demisexuality is housed under the asexuality spectrum. It’s part of the gray area between being allosexual and asexual. It’s part of why the definition for asexuality includes “little to no sexual attraction”. It’s a mostly asexual experience with an asterisk.

While being demisexual may have impacts on a persons sexual activity, even demisexuals have a varied relationship to the act of participating in sex. Libido and sexual attraction are not always intertwined either, which can make telling the difference tricky.

I think of sexual attraction as libido that has a compass. Since I rarely ever experience sexual attraction, but do have libido, it’s noticeable for me when that libido actually has a direction to go, rather than being a floating, nebulous, independent thing.

Remember, not everyone is demisexual. There’s a difference between waiting to have sex and not having sexual attraction at all until a certain point. This also inherently ties demisexuality to romantic attraction and relationships, and not all demisexuals are alloromantic.

But if you read what demisexuality is and think “everyone is like that” or “that’s just being a woman”, you either 1) are demisexual 2) don’t understand what it is or 3) both. And it’s okay to not know. Just as long as you’re willing to try to learn.

The Ghoul will give it to him; that poor sod Cooper Howard was right about one thing, at least. Quittin' showbiz and movin' to a ranch to raise Janey in the fresh air was just about the best idea he ever had. He just had the wrong woman at his side for it at the time.

Yo, correct me if I am wrong please, but didn't Hitler rise to power because he promised to fix the German economy and people really liked that so they looked past everything else he was doing??? Like exactly what's happening in America right now???

So many people said they voted for Trump, put a truly evil person in power, because he said he'd fix the economy, and a little voice in my head is going, "Isn't that what happened with fucking Hitler??"

But I've seen no one point that out so maybe I'm miss remembering???????

I really do like headcanoning that a shakarian romance would have a great impact on turian-human relations throughout the galaxy (especially if we pretend that SPOILER Shepard somehow doesn't die).

Because Shepard definitely is a public figure, especially by the time ME3 rolls around and Garrus is calling Shepard his girlfriend left and right. But the first contact war only happened 26 years before ME1 so tensions are obviously still fresh between their two species. But also, as media has always shown us, a romance is always more sexy and compelling than a peace treaty.

So maybe Shepard and Garrus accidentally actually make relations between their two species really really good. Like repairing decades old wounds good. The two militaries start doing more joint trainings together because of the proof of how good Shepard's team is. More ships like the Normandy are built. Turian-human romantic relationships gradually become less and less of a taboo with them being the poster children for it.

And maybe they never say anything officially but various sources have overheard Garrus Vakarian refer to himself as Shepard's boyfriend and in both political and casual settings Commander Shepard is rarely seen without her right hand turian attached to her hip.

And as much as they both claim to want to retire post-war, the workaholics in them keep them active in their military and politics. So the cameras are still on them constantly, but since they're respected war heroes, the major news networks feel like speaking on their personal lives and asking questions would be inappropriate. And yet, the talking points Garrus and Shepard choose are often about how they are campaigning for more inter-species adoption and how cross-species colonies are vital to the galaxy's rebuilding efforts right now. And Garrus is often seen taking calls from Earth and Shepard from Palaven. So their legacy and mystery continues, and both turians and humans seen their friendship or romance as a pillar in their diplomacy efforts.

*Pinches nose*

PSA Announcement: Solomancing Halsin does not make him monogamous. It's not a fan's responsibility to go sleep with others to make sure gatekeeping poly fans are reassured he's still poly. There is no minimum quota of people a fan has to sleep with for someone to still be poly. I'm sorry I don't find others attractive enough to put them above Halsin, but it's my playthrough, not the ones who are complaining. I don't owe the polyamorous group validation ON MY OWN PRIVATE PLAYTHROUGH through denial of my own preferences. What I like does not change that Halsin is still polyamorous.

On that note too, Shadowheart and Astarion are also poly despite some fans' insistence that they're monogamous victims being preyed upon by Halsin.

If you have never said this to anyone, carry on, this message is not directed at you.

*Waits for the torches and pitchforks*

I cannot believe there's absolutely no way to watch free shows and movies anymore, there are too many paid streaming platforms and pirating websites have viruses and ads preventing you from watching it uninterrupted((.)) id rather follow the rules and purchase media moving forward because it is too inconvenient. Seriously, free and no ads or viruses with 1080p streaming is DEAD.

It's one thing to dislike Halsin, but don't flipping try to justify a rape threat from Minthara while accusing Halsin of something he NEVER does.

Halsin: I understand, and I still cherish our relationship

Minthara: I already know your mind. I will know your body, one way or another.

Fans wouldn't like it if people kept lying and misrepresenting their favorite. Why do Halsin fans have to listen to these lies?!

I'm not ok with anyone saying this sort of thing regardless of gender. And Minthara may be a drow, but she's on the surface, where, you know, consent matters?!

Halsin is many times creepier than Minthara. Minthara atleast has the courtesy to let you know you have no choice. It's an act of domination not sexuality. Halsin instead pretends like he would be alright with not taking his violent sexual urges on you

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