- A Small Boy Who Informed Me That He Was One Pound. Normal People Are Five Pounds, According To Him,

- A small boy who informed me that he was one pound. Normal people are five pounds, according to him, and sharks are ten pounds. He lost his mind when I told him that we have an animal that is five hundred pounds

- My dive buddy from yesterday’s pool session, and the gentleman that joined in on our torpedo catch game. I don’t know the additional guy’s name, but he told be good luck on my buoyancy

- The hilarious experience my mom and I had at the Barbie Malibu Cafe

- The sheer diversity in people. I’ve never seen so many different people in one place. To be fair the state I came from was extremely white and generally conservative

- That previously mentioned Thor manager that randomly gives me things. He bought me a fidget cube because I kept destroying towels. He handed me a piece of a broken microphone during a morning meeting without a single word

- A bunch of guys drawing a penis out of them walking on a snow-covered lake

- Baby softshell turtles!

- An older woman handed me a handmade frog charm while I was working. I think she was a fae

- My nametag has a price sticker on it for $0.12. I get a lot of comments on it about how I’m worth more than twelve cents. It makes me happy, even if the sticker is just a meme

Things I Like Here.

So I moved from my childhood state a few years ago and I’ve been struggling with adjusting ever since, largely because of the drastic negative change in my social life. But life is beautiful, so I wanted to make a list of things I’ve seen since moving here that I couldn’t get back home! You have to appreciate the little things in life. I’m gonna periodically add more as I see them

- “The Oven Bus” which is just a bus with a brick chimney in it. I wanna know what’s going on in there so badly

- All of the sunsets here are beautiful without fail. Don’t matter what time they happen, even if it’s at 4, it’s beautiful. There’s so many colours in them

- The sign I drive past on the way to work that says “WALTZ IS FOR MURDERING THE UNBORN.” I don’t agree with it but it’s fucking hilarious to see, because it’s in the middle of nowhere

- Related, since we live out in the country now, the pro-life religious bulletins that have the most CGI looking babies on them. Like that baby is not real. Honey

- I almost got into an accident once because there are so many dogs down a 55 MPH road that I just kept looking at the dogs

- The church that has six doors outside on their lawn that say “GOD’S DOORS ARE OPEN TO ALL”

- The church that has a progress flag on its flag post and a BLM flag flying under it. I went there once and it’s full of old people. They were so kind. I want to go back there again

- The kind lady at the Chinese takeout restaurant down the road from us who stayed when the restaurant was empty so I could pick up my order. I wanted my brother to get it but he bailed last minute

- The grocery store down the street that my family has wildly different pronunciations of. It’s within walking distance. I’ve never had that before

- The man today who accidentally bought two tickets for himself. Instead of refunding one, he wanted to give away the other one for free

- The mall Santa I see around Christmas time when he’s on his break. Just walking around. High socks and shorts with a Christmas theme, he’s great

- The little girl yesterday who told me she would get a dog and a fish. When I asked her what she would name the dog, she said “Rainbow Pup”

- The parents who use they/them to refer to me. Even though I personally don’t use those pronouns and don’t like them when they’re used in reference to me, it’s a sign of progress

- The little girl whose parents I sold an annual pass to. I’ve seen her four times. She recognizes me each time and runs to give me a hug

- The toddler who tried to hand me her half-eaten cinnamon-dusted timbit when I asked her for a high five

- The kind people at KwikTrip who never look like they don’t want to be there

- My supervisor who shrieks whenever he walks by me because that’s how I greet people so he’s started greeting me like that as well. He’s an absolute truck of a man who looks like Thor