Latest Posts by nixisverytired - Page 13

people like to talk about how bad toxic masculinity is until they hear transmasculine people talking about their experience and suddenly it turns into "stop whining, you are A MAN"

Your issues with masculinity and malehood are not the curse that trans men must bear in order to earn your respect or protection ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

I think we need to sit down and talk about malgendering.

Not misgendering, malgendering.

We all know what misgendering means. Misgendering is when a trans person (or to be honest, even a cis person) has their gender denied to them in some fashion by implying, suggesting or outright stating that their gender is actually Something Else and not the one they identify as.

e.g. A trans woman being told she cannot attend a certain class because it's 'just for women'.

Malgendering is when the trans persons gender is not questioned or denied and may even be affirmed - but only in a context in which it can be used against them in some fashion (to make judgements on them as a person, to exclude them from something, to incite bigotry towards them etc).

e.g. That same trans woman taking her shirt off on a hot day and being arrested for indecent exposure.

This is misgendering;- "You're not a woman, you're a man." This is malgendering;- "Trans women are women, so obviously they exist to serve men."* *obvs it is also transmisogyny and all malgendering is transphobia.

But what you don't want to hear is that malgendering is a form of transphobia mainly used against trans masculine people and nonbinary people.

Most people recognise malgendering when it's;

Using the term 'theyfab' to ridicule an agender person or making jokes about how an agender they/them user looks (to you) to be a completely cis woman.

But you need to look out for how;

Malgendering is treating trans men like their transition has turned them into women-hating predators because of your own predjudices towards men/trans man were always inherently women-hating predators because maleness is what makes you those things not your actual thoughts, words and actions.

Malgendering is not listening to how trans masc people are marginalised 'because men aren't oppressed though' as if that's not ignoring a huge part of their identity (the being trans part) and how that works.

Malgendering is telling trans men 'this is just what it's like to be a man, people treat you like shit and you have to take it or not transition'.

Malgendering is insisting that any trans man who calls any attention to the fact that he is indeed, trans, and has/had female anatomy and faces misogyny due to being raised and still perceived (by transphobes) as a woman is misgendering himself, all other trans men and 'weaponising his AFABness'

All of this is transphobia. All of this is bigotry. This kind of predjudice and bullying doesn't magically become 'OK' once you find the 'right' group to do it to. You either want to end bigotry and transphobia and identity-specific targetted hate or you want to perpetuate it. But you can't call yourself a trans ally, or escape the bigotry allegations whilst malgendering people. And no you're not being sneaky by slipping in your hateful predjudice comments and actions whilst validating their gender.

Malgendering is transphobia.

Block people who make bad faith posts about trans women's struggles by saying trans men do not struggle.

Block people who post on trans men's vents by suggesting they don't suffer as profoundly as their sisters.

Block people who try to make you turn against the women and others who make up our family.

Do not allow yourself to become bitter and jealous, protect yourself and you will be protecting our community.

"trans guys are uniquely capable of perpetrating misogyny" everyone is uniquely capable of perpetrating misogyny dipshit it came free with your fucking living in a patriarchal society

alert alert a trans man expressed enjoyment in being a man for a moment and didn’t feel sorry about it y’all gotta do something about it how dare he say “men are cool” without stating he knows oppression and patriarchy exists and he’s sorry before that

Misogyny.

I'm so fucking sick of identity politics and queer discourse

I made this blog because I want to stick up for my transmasc friends and allies.

Right now, trans men/transmascs in general are the current "acceptable target " in online lgbt+ spaces. I've seen this happen with aces, bi and pan people, trans women, intersex people... you get the idea. It's the same bullshit every time, and it's getting old.

The solution to discrimination will never be attacking our queer siblings.

I'm not here to debate or give assholes a platform. Zionists, trolls and terfs are getting blocked, y'all ain't welcome.

This is how I view the current transandrophobia discourse:

Group A: argues that transandrophobia is real and should be an acceptable term for people to use when discussing the unique intersection of masculinity and transphobia. This group is mainly comprised of transmascs, who have a right to create and discuss words and theory relating to their own community.

Group B: argues that the term "transandrophobia" is inherently flawed and problematic, and that trans men/mascs do not experience oppression for identifying as men. Crucially, this group is mainly comprised of non-transmascs, and thus should not be considered the authority on transmascs experiences.

Needless to say, I consider myself a supporter of Group A. Transmascs DO in fact face a unique form of discrimination BECAUSE of their masculine identities; I've seen it happen firsthand to my loved ones. Denying this is denying victims the right to speak about their oppression.

If you aren’t transmasc, you do not get to say these experiences are "just misogyny" or "just transphobia." Frankly, I don't think anyone should police the words another person uses to describe their own trauma.

Additionally, I have seen some rampant exorsexism, intersexism, and yes, transandrophobia, in Group B circles. Of course, when you align yourself with one side of a discourse, you will only see the worst in the other. That doesn't change the fact that it’s happening, and I'm going to point it out when I see it.

Please Note:

I am extremely pro-blocking. Block anyone who says cruel shit to you. Block anyone who bothers you. Block me if you think I'm annoying!

Anyone who makes generalizations about ANY community is getting blocked. Trans women do not hate trans men. Trans men do not hate trans women. No single trans identity is uniquely privileged or bigoted. This isn't kindergarten. Cut the boys vs girls bullshit.

I'm not here to argue about the existence of transmisogyny. It is real and rampant in the LGBT+ community, end of story.

Lastly, talk shit out like adults, please. I dislike it when people take screenshots of bad takes so they can complain about others behind their backs. However, I'll make an exception for people who are being uniquely awful.

If someone is "joking" about how much they want to kill transmascs, calling someone slurs, or sending an unconsenting person sexual messages, all bets are off. They are a transphobe and a traitor to the LGBT+ community, regardless of identity.

So please remember:

Identity discourse is a tar pit. Put more energy into uplifting your transmasc brothers and siblings than engaging with assholes.