Latest Posts by nixisverytired - Page 12

Stop worrying about checking IDs at the gate and help us knock down all these fucking fences.

Don’t Turn Trans Men Posts About Trans Men Into Something Else Not About Trans Men 2025 Challenge

To any trans men or mascs scrolling through discourse tags right now:

I know things on tumblr may seem dire, but I promise the majority of the LGBT+ community doesn’t think this way.

You are allowed to be loud, to get angry. You deserve to have a voice. You have the right to speak up when people say things that hurt you- yes, even if these people are also LGBT+

Just know that these assholes DO NOT represent all of us. Don't let them trick you into believing otherwise. They may convince themselves that they are the “voice of the community” or whatever, but they’re just another hateful clique of bullies.

It’s not your job to fix those bigots’ toxic worldviews; you owe them nothing. You’re doing plenty by continuing to exist and advocating for yourself. Keep doing it as loudly and proudly as possible.

The rest of us have got your back, and you’re welcome here. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise.

The thing with like aphobia and transandrophobia and stuff is like

sometimes. you are going to see people complaining about oppression. and it's going to make you feel bad and uncomfortable. because you yourself are oppressed and in these circles you are used to being The Oppressed One and seeing these other complains about People Including You reminds you of actual bigotry in broader spaces, or makes you doubt your own oppression, or just makes it feel like you're being told you 'have it easy'.

but. that's not what's happening. what's happening is just that other people also have systematic problems and deserve to talk about it.

that is not an attack on you.

oppression is not a zero-sum game. Aspecs, or trans men, being better acknowledge as suffering from oppression, does not mean that you have it any less bad than you have known yourself to do.

it doesn't even mean that they have it 'worse'. It means exactly what I said: that they also have issues that they need help with and are worth discussing.

If that upsets the basis of your own understand of your oppression... yeah. maybe that means your understanding was wrong. sorry.

but it's only the THEORETICAL UNDERSTANDING that has been upset. your oppression is still not in any kind of question.

is that easy to understand or carry forth? no.

but it's necessary.

and it has happened, over and over again. When gay people and trans people were at head to head, both presenting the other as predatory sexual deviants and themselves as 'normal'. When gay men diminished lesbians' suffering because they were less likely to get on the news for being murdered than gay men. when bisexuals (within Tumblr's own history!!!!!!) were widely panned as possessing 'straight-passing privilege' and therefore never in the same 'category' of oppression as gay men and lesbians.

it happens over and over and over again. and it's always hard. but it always needs to happen, morally.

even if the people expressing their oppression are 'too aggressive'. even if their arguments make you feel uncomfortable and scared. even if the place you belonged no longer feels like home anymore.

it'd be nice if every time something happened that made you feel bad, it was because of somebody Bad who needs to be Stopped and/or Punished. but that just isn't the case.

an oppressed group (and we can judge this by statistics; it's really not that difficult) talking about their oppression is not causing actual harm to you. and even if they were, they still deserve to be able to do it.

Ask your local transandrophobic dirtbag where they were during the ace discourse years ago.

if you legitimately believe that any trans identity has privilege over another there is genuinely something wrong with you and you need to go outside

If you claim to support trans rights, but deny transandrophobia, you don't actually support trans rights any more than a TERF supports trans rights.

All those "we need more weird queers" posts pointing out how our community won't accept even the simplest of things but now we have to add trans men onto it.

non-transmasc. before you is a transmasc person talking about their experiences with being transmasculine and the oppression that they experience for being transmasculine. the bomb detonates if you tell them to just call it transphobia, if you imply their oppression/experience is incorrect, if you tell them that they signed up for it for being transmasculine. begin.

I'm gonna be real with you and say that it's not really progressive when you see black characters/POC coded characters and instantly talk about how cool they are because they piss of bigots.

I'm sorry but like, can I draw the joy of myself and my racial identity without thinking about how politicized my existence is Thanks.

Hi, I'm genuinely looking for an explanation here and not looking for an argument /srs

Can you explain how calling a transfem a TERF for spreading ideology that I genuinely assumed was included in the definition of TERFism is othering ? Not to be that guy, but I'm autistic and I'm having a very hard time connecting the points you're making, and I genuinely want to learn and understand what you're saying /gen

Again, I do hope this doesn't come off as hostile, I am genuinely trying to learn and understand better, and I want to be able to fix misconceptions about what a TERF is in my own mind, and I haven't seen anyone bring this point up before /gen

You absolutely do not have to answer this, but I hope you have a fabulous rest of your day, and I do apologize for what I said, as it wasn't necessary for me to comment on the situation.

Yeah totally! Okay, I got a lot of this from Ibram X. Kendi's "How to be Antiracist"* where he talks about describing "racist" as an identity means that hardly anyone is going to ever "identify" with it, even if they are a racist. It's much more helpful to talk about actions being racist or anti-racist. Someone committing racist acts speaks far more to the vulnerability of anyone to cause harm, rather than it being something ONLY reserved for someone with the identity of "racist". For example, Clarence Thomas, a black man, has done untold amounts of harm to the black population in the US. If we subscribe to the "oh, (X) can't be racist, they are (a minority)" train of thought, it means people are less likely to understand that Clarence Thomas commits racist acts. In the same way, describing yourself as an anti-racist is not enough, as it can let people be comfortable with racist actions because they think "oh, I'm an anti-racist, I can't commit acts of racial harm." That's why it's more helpful to describe acts as racist and anti-racist rather than framing them as identities.

In a similar way, describing someone as the label of "TERF" can have a similar effect. Because it's specifically a label centered around being anti-trans, transgender people of all kinds will easily assume they cannot be transphobic, because the label of TERF is ideologically opposed to their existence. It invites ridicule rather than introspection. By saying actions can be transphobic, I think it helps a lot more because it's easier to understand that trans people can be transphobic. For example, Blaire White is right there. Despite being a trans woman, she is actively doing transphobic acts. By calling out an action as transphobic rather than describing someone as a "TERF", it helps fight back against the idea that being trans means you cannot be transphobic. For a super duper simple example, I can step on my dogs tail, but it doesn't mean I hate dogs, it means I committed an act of harm against my dog. Describing me as a dog-hater when I LOVE dogs would invite ridicule more than it would a tendency to watch my step when my dog is in the house. I hope this makes sense!

*I'm not trying to say the Black and Trans experience is exactly the same, just that like any oppressed group, there is a lot of overlap in tactics and thinking, especially for people who are Black and Trans. Reading about other groups can really give you a ton of helpful insight on how to work within your own identity!

The changes you get when starting T are wonderful and should be celebrated.

Don't let anyone tell you that starting T will make you ugly, unlovable, or whatever other bullshit they pull out of where they keep their head.

If you'd be happier on T, start it. ASAP.

anything that targets cis women like abortion bans and child marriage are going to also affect trans men/mascs

anything that targets trans people like hrt bans and hate crimes are going to also affect trans men/mascs

and there are also issues that disproportionately affect trans men/mascs like being denied health care based on medical records indicating that they are or were taking testosterone or the harms that come with chest binding for long periods of time or the increased rates of depression/attempted suicide/sexual assault that trans men/mascs suffer from

all these different types of oppression intersect in a way that we call:

TRANSANDROPHOBIA

you dont get the privilege of having ur name redacted if ur gonna take pride in wishing death to entire minority groups btw

list of everyone who liked or reblogged this post:

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bc i just saw a post use the word: if you use “theyfab” to speak about transmasc/nonbinary people (who may have been afab, but amab intersex people who are transmasc or nonbinary exist too), then you are not a person i want to interact with. all you want to do is misgender the people who speak about transmasc oppression by basically calling them woman lite. and you can fuck off.

I don't know what trans man need to hear this but you're allowed to be angry. It doesn't make you evil. You are allowed to experience all possible emotions without apology and still be a good man.

*this is about trans men specifically, do not derail. You are free to make your own post*

I kind of find it interesting (along with disheartening and downright enraging) how the online queer community is stuck in a constant and endless toxic discourse loop. Each time, we are targeting a new ingroup to constantly harass, bar from spaces, and twitter threads about how this identity-is-so-problematic, and if you support it you're Hitler incarnate and also you're on 200 DNI lists.

Whether it's nonbinary people, "tucutes", xenogenders, neopronouns, asexuals, bisexuals, trans women, trans men, girlfags, lesboys, bi lesbians etc. It's always the same thing.

"We must stop these 'harmful identities' and conservatives will finally love us and we will solve homophobia and transphobia forever if we get rid of boydykes and girlfags! And trust me, when this happened to nonbinary people it was TOTALLY unjustified, but it's totally for a good reason this time!"

Like, do you guys not see this? Am I actually crazy or is it just the same loop over and over. And like in my last post about transandrophobia, if you come to this post discoursing, I'll be laughing in your face for how pathetic this all is.

“Queer events have a tme lean” you mean a cis lean. If you think other trans people get just as included as cis people in general queer spaces you have not spoken to enough of us. To say this in the context of trans men and transmasculine people in particular is so frustrating to me when so many queer spaces and events are given a “women and femmes” theming.

the fact that people are genuinely, unironically arguing against the idea that you should listen to transmascs about the oppression they face is so funny to me

i cannot imagine telling a whole minority "we know your oppression better than you" because that just sounds like plain old bigotry to me

but dont worry, transmascs definitely dont face misogyny, even when people are telling them that they don't understand their own experiences, and they need to have their oppression explained to them because they're too simple to understand it themselves

"queer people need to get weirder"

but can you handle a nonbinary transmasc/trans man who is femme and passes as his agab, yet DON'T want to be grouped with women and/or femmes, AT ALL???

CAN YOU???

straight transmasc people i love you so much and your attraction to women is not inherently "icky" or "dirty" or whatever other word terfs are trying to throw into the queer community nowadays

genuinely have had numerous people tell me that as a trans man i'm "a men's rights activist invading trans spaces".

so many people legitimately do not see trans men as trans.

i need people to understand that so many people for some reason have the idea that trans = feminine or woman. it's a real issue.

how are trans men invading trans spaces? this is where we live. and of course we're gonna advocate for our own rights. why wouldn't we? we don't exist to self flagellate because the idea of transsexual and transgender manhood and masculinity frightens you. i'm a trans man. i'm trans. i'm not invading my own community.

"If men could get pregnant, abortions wouldn't be a problem!"

"If men could get periods, all period products would be free and accessible!"

SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP. SHUT UP.

‼️‼️‼️ STOP IGNORING AND EXCLUDING TRANS MEN‼️‼️‼️

it kills me how much people love to speculate on the trans male experience. transphobes and even other trans people will conjure up ideas of what it must be like for us to live, how hormones affect us, and especially what society treats us like. they love to tell us how we live our lives; strawman after strawman about fictional trans men who started hormones and became "evil and ugly", completely fabricated stories about about how every trans man they know suddenly "gained male privilege" and never deal with misogyny or transandrophobia.

people who tell you how your transmasculine experience will go have no idea what they are talking about. even if they sound confident, they are not correct- each and every transmasculine person has a different experience in life- we do not automatically gain the societal privilege of cishet white men once we decide to socially transition. they cannot see what your future holds. you don't deserve to have someone telling you how you will experience your own life, it is yours, you are allowed to live your truth, pave your own way and prove that we have varied lives that transcend what transphobes think the trans male experience is.

Tumblr is great because there are people who without a hint of irony will essentially say “being mean is a fundamental part of my ideology” and expect you to respect that

I think people forgot that “punching up” is about punching at the power structure and those actively upholding it, not harming individual people or entire groups of marginalized people you’ve deemed less of a victim of that structure than you are by using that very structure as your way to harm them.

idk guys i have 5 transfem friends irl and all of them wholeheartedly believe transadrophobia is real… maybe it’s because they aren’t in anti-transmasculinity rad fem echo chambers… maybe it’s because they actually are friends with multiple transmasc irl and see their struggles… guess we’ll never know though…

Every day I see countless transmascs ashamed of their masculinity, feeling like they "sided with the enemy", so much so that when I was in car with my friend and he started telling me about how his absentee father shaped the view of his own masculinity that I interrupted him to say that he doesn't have to be ashamed

To which he stopped me going on a rant to tell me that no, in fact, he feels like he is already such a better man than him, because he knows he would never do such a thing

And that really really stuck with me

Trans men, transmascs, and honestly, anyone else who participates in queer masculinity, make the world a better place

As a very femme trans woman, seeing queer people happy in their masculinity, finding joy in it, relief, makes my heart full

It is beautiful what you all do by simply existing

And please, keep going ❤️

do you actually care about trans men or do you relegate male pregnancy to the status of "gross but funny fanfiction trope" at best and "literal body horror" at worst? do you actually care about trans men or have you accepted without question the ideas that bottom growth is a borderline-torturously painful process and phalloplasty is a dangerous surgery with objectively unsatisfactory results because they confirm your implicit assumptions about the violence and horror of masculinization? do you actually care about trans men or do you think testosterone being a controlled substance is fair because you prioritize fairness in sports more highly than transmasculine lives? do you actually care about trans men or do you distance yourself from us as we transition and make half-joking comments about us being traitors because you view transmasculinity as a shift from ally to enemy? do you actually care about trans men or do you get mad at us when we read transmasculine experiences into female characters because you see it as an act of theft and believe transmasculinity is inherently less valuable than womanhood? do you actually care about trans men or is your first thought when you see a transition timeline about how pretty the "before" picture is? do you actually care about trans men or does your interest in our lives begin and end with how badly you want a boypussy to fuck?

do we exist to you as real people or only in theory? do you read the stories we tell, listen to the music we make? how many of us can you name? when we speak, do you listen? would you fight for us? do you trust us to know ourselves best? are you our friend? do you mourn us when we're gone? do you care for us while we're still here?

idk man i think that if you can read dozens and dozens of trans men talking about how their support systems abandoned them when they started getting too masculine on T or had top surgery or whatever, and queer spaces started treating them like threats or potential predators, and you find these stories going back to the 90s or even earlier, and you read all of that and come away thinking that there’s nothing wrong with how progressive communities treat men, you are just fundamentally beyond help dude. you don’t see us as people