BDJJDKGRSJKBJF THAT IS AN AMAZING MUSIC ANALYSIS OMG?? You Described Fight Or Flight So Well 🙏 Also

Can I talk about the fact Akutagawa doesn’t understand why Atsushi saved him, even though he did the exact same thing for Atsushi. Him using the word 'protect' rather than save is also so powerful to me because that's inherently what Akutagawa always has been- a protector. He was born with his ability and he protected his sister, the other kids in the slums with it. He sacrificed himself so Atsushi could leave the ship. And now, we've yet to see how Bram's wish will play out, but he was asked to protect Aya. Rashomon is shaped like knight armour on him at this exact moment.

And yet he can't understand why someone would do the same for him???? Absolutely INSANE. He's spent so long protecting others and then trying to better himself for approval, to be able to survive on his own by sheer violence that he can't fathom anyone doing the same for him. It was probably the same when Higuchi and the black lizards saved him when he was comatose.

And likely, he knows Atsushi views him as immoral and his actions as abhorrent, and is stuck on the fact Atsushi has had a sudden switch (sudden to him) in such a huge way that he'd die for him, since Atsushi has never been shy about telling Akutagawa just what he thinks of him. He can’t fathom Atsushi seeing his violence and hatred toward him and knowing him so deeply without understanding him and also choosing to save him.

Asagiri you're insane for this truly.

fic where atsushi refuses to acknowledge that akutagawa's in the mafia

like akutagawa introduced himself and everything and it drives him insane but atsushi's just like 'yeah this is akutagawa. oh no he's harmless trust. he's just a civilian. think he owns a flowershop'

If This Was a Movie by Taylor Swift fits sskk and I would like to say why 🙏

If anything, it fits them double now, due to chapter 121.5, and it would *so* be from Atsushi's pov after Akutagawa died in their fight against Fukuchi, but it could also be from Akutagawa's pov

"Last night I heard my own heart beating

Sounded like footsteps on my stairs

Six months gone and I'm still reaching

Even though I know you're not there" THAT IS SO SO THEM 😭 like it just fits Atsushi's mourning after Akutagawa died (and the six months lyric is just perfection)

"I was playing back a thousand memories, baby

Thinking 'bout everything we've been through

Maybe I've been going back too much lately

When time stood still and I had you" Atsushi reminiscing and thinking back to the fight with Fukuchi is very well described with these lyrics 

"Come back, come back, come back to me like

You would, you would if this was a movie

Stand in the rain outside 'til I came out"

Just the whole entire song is so similar to them. The pain, the loss, the heartbreak. Everything Atsushi regrets, everything that haunts him about Akutagawa's death. All his hopes that Akutagawa could come back (thankfully he did but then l m a o Atsushi had to go and die •-•)

Sskk makes me unwell I love them so much 😔 anyways I was just obsessing over this song and realized it fit sskk to a painful degree lmao 

tell me about your favorite of your wips. >:)

uhhh

I have a lot I'm fond of and my favorite one is going to be kept a secret because I want to reveal nothing about it until I actually finish writing chapter one 😔

Anyways, one of my other favorites is my wip "I picked the petals, he loves me not"

It's a hanahaki sskk au, where Akutagawa starts coughing up flowers due to a crush on a...certain someone...

But yk, with his lung condition and all that, the hanahaki will probably kill him in like a month or even less

And the hanahaki strikes while Atsushi and Akutagawa are heading back from a mission and then Atsushi gets all worried bc wtf people don't just start vomiting petals everywhere and then Akutagawa has to brush it off like "it's nothing weretiger" when it's very clearly not nothing 😔

Atsushi goes to Ranpo for advice and Ranpo tells him about hanahaki and how it all works. So now Atsushi's determined to save Akutagawa, and saving him requires Akutagawa to confess his feelings to whoever he loves (I wonder who that could be 👀)

Chaos ensues

Also I've had this idea for like at least a year now but my snail of a brain is just like "I'll get to it later"

Also the title is a lyric from the song You're On Your Own, Kid by Taylor Swift

@mi1ikan Bsd analysations are scary but also amazing

Doing my usual "lets go back and read random BSD chapters" and I can't help but notice how different Fyodor is now to when he was first introduced.

I've made a few posts pointing out how Fyodor and Dazai have similar panels, but I'm starting to think he's actually mimicking Dazai's mannerisms on purpose now.

I don't have a lot of canon proof other than, ~a feeling~, I get looking at him, so consider this a headcanon rather than a theory.

Warning Manga spoilers under the cut!

Like, Fyodor, why does this keep happening??? Fyodor's versions of these poses also all happen later in the manga than Dazai's versions.

Now, there's the argument that Fyodor wasn't there for half of these, but we do know he's a hacker and he was obsessed with Dazai for a time. I do believe he would just sit there watching Dazai's movements on cameras to learn his patterns and habits in the name of defeating him.

Compare how he holds himself now, to how he did when he was first introduced.

He's a shut in who bites his nails, doesn't take care of his posture or appearance. He's so used to being behind the curtains he's off putting to be directly around.

Whereas Dazai is a chameleon, he blends in anywhere he goes. If I was an immortal so out of touch with my own humanity and basic identity, I probably pick someone to mimic their behaviours too.

Ironic that he choose the man who doesn't consider himself human to learn from.

I'm also drawn to this panel specifically.

(Very suspicious choice of words there, considering the current manga arc, but I digress)

Typically when we think of vampires, we think of blood sucking immortals, but the vampire we have in BSD is based of Dracula. Dracula specifically poses the question of "What if vampires stole who you are as well?". The idea that you can't consume someone's very life without having their soul linger on with you.

The Count learns to blend in with modern society through Johnathan, from learning from him and by feeding off him. Mina, Renfield and Lucy all slowly lose who they are the more influence the Count has over them.

This panel says he's soulless, he's 'empty', he's a vampire waiting to steal someone else's soul to fill him up. Now, that could be a hint at what his ability turned out to be, but it could also mean how he's mimicking Dazai.

But why mimic Dazai?

Well, simply put, he was the only one Fyodor saw as an equal and we know he wanted a companion who he considered to be his equal. So why not make himself more like the man he wants at his side. To obtain Dazai, he became Dazai.

Problem is Dazai hates himself, he also seems to dislike any character that's convinced they are the same. (Note: Not characters Dazai sees himself in, like Atsushi, but characters who insist to him that they are the same, like Mori and Fyodor)

It was a doomed plot from the start.

However, Dazai is no longer his goal. Atsushi is. Fyodor knows Atsushi greatly admires Dazai, so continuing to mimic Dazai's mannerisms to connect them together in Atsushi's mind could be part of his plan now.

oh he loves him

OH HE LOVES HIM SO MUCH

Is that sskk fic recommendations I feel in the air? :0

I love the title card omg and I will be bookmarking every fic on this list bc damn, some sskk is truly needed (without sskk I assume I would spontaneously combust)

(yes i had fun with the title card)

The time has come to complete my legacy.

First off, I highly recommend stopping by the list I made some time ago, because those turned out to be timeless classics, must-reads: clicky here click. Special thanks to @beegowhoosh and @mikayuumouse for inspiring me to update this one! If that list feels overwhelming, my personal favourites are: All The Memories Of You by collectingblues, waiting room by srxlee and enshroud me by @lost--dimension; my silly words are just not enough to recommend those enough, truly changed my brain chemistry.

yokohama bay hotel by spirallings [Words: 9.5k | Chapters: 1/1 | T]

Honestly, inject this fic in my bloodstream, I got emotional just opening it and rereading the first line to write this review. Social media AU with vlogger Aku who one day finds Atsushi’s music channel, reaches out to him to express his highest admirations, and the rest is a beautiful story of building trust, friendship and falling in love. Immaculate narration, easy flowing and so heartfelt, had me smiling (and crying but shh) throughout the whole thing. A unique storytelling style through the occasional tweets, texts, emails and subtle descriptions of the scene, mixed with classic narration, strikingly in-character dialogue and songs. Just open it to see what I mean, it is genuinely like nothing I’ve read before and I hold this story very close to my heart. There is also a 150 songs playlist that goes with the fic, def some bangers in there.

and the funny thing is i would have married you (if you had stuck around) by cheezee [Words: 11k | Chapters: 1/1 | T]

Time travel and reincarnation, a tragic (but hopeful nonetheless) story following Akutagawa’s death on that ship and Atsushi traversing space and time to find him again, and again… and again… with the cursed fate taking his love away from him. It’s an emotional ride of happiness and melancholy, hope and despair, broken promises and lost memories. This reads as a classic tale of love, personally reminds me of a greek tragedy, and the writing is impressively poetic, simply pulling on the heartstrings.

...I wanna be next to you by Iyrs [Words: 2k | Chapters: 1/1 | G]

(i am definitely not biased because I made art for this, no sir) Wonderfully tasteful narration and the softest words of comfort, beautifully showing how much their relationship has progressed, the trust and ease and emotional vulnerability. There is one particular most domestic scene that lives in my mind rent-free, trust me and give this a quick read.

the plan (YOUR FINGERS) by lizandre [Words: 5k | Chapters: 1/1 | T]

I’m gonna struggle a lot to explain this one lol (if the trust me bro argument is not enough). I could personally not find a better word to describe the style of writing than simply genius. If I may quote the author from the summary, this is a story of how “Akutagawa Ryunosuke loses it entirely.” It has the humor, it has the pain, it has the classic psychoanalysis that every good fic has of course. Basically Aku not realizing the emotional turmoil he’s experiencing is not being possessed or mind controlled or going mad, but simply falling in love. And Atsushi being the voice and hand of reason to get him out of his madness. Aku here is as unapologetically dramatic as any theatre kid could be, 10/10, not even trying. Just straight up check everything this person has written imao, this fic is just one of many masterpieces.

Safe Underground by forget_me_nots [Words: 25k | Chapters: 5/5 | M (Violence, Main Character Death)]

This one is a hidden gem, severely underrated, criminally low exposure. It is an AU based on the videogame Lobotomy Corporation (that I actually had no knowledge of, but you don’t need to know it to enjoy the fic at all). Horror, gore and panic with close to zero comfort, grief of death and living nightmares. The style of writing is extremely skillful, with meaningful repeating motifs and metaphors. All of the characters are incredibly well-written and the growing friendship between our main duo in circumstances of utter tragedy is as enjoyable to read as ever. Pay attention to the coffee.

Moonlit Resurrection by june_berry [Words: 143k | Chapters: 16/? | E (Violence, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat)]

And while we’re on the theme of madness! I need to take a deep breath for this one. Incredibly depressing story on existentialism, trauma and self-destruction, told by poetic writing like no other. To quote the author: “Atsushi is hit by an ability that sends him spiraling. Forced to confront his traumatic past or die in two weeks, Atsushi begrudgingly teams up with the man he hasn’t seen in years: Akutagawa Ryuunosuke.” The highlight of this fic is honestly the narration style itself, it delves deep into Atsushi’s and Akutagawa’s minds and perfectly encapsulates their own deteriorating psyche. Deeply introspective. This was, strangely enough and despite the lack of comfort, a healing experience for me, basically a "Hey you see what happens to Atsushi when he got depressed, maybe don't do that." Worked wonders, truly. But be careful if you’re not in a good state of mind because it may have the opposite effect. Also cannot forget to give fair credit to @the-bengali-diva for incidentally introducing me to this one, they’ve even made paintings for the fic! Thank you truly, I would have never found this masterpiece alone!

Of Monsters and Men by Mississippi_moon [Words: 32k | Chapters: 18/18 | T]

On a brighter note! Mercenary Akutagawa failing to assassinate Atsushi, the Prince of Yokohama (and of course slowly falls in love with him instead). Made me smile and laugh and clutch my chest so many times, I just couldn’t put it down [also kindly named my google docs analysis for this “the royal dopamine injection*, i hope that says something on its own]. Very good humor mixed with equally good torture and suffering (and fluff and comfort!). The progression of sskk’s relationship is fantastic. Oh and Atsushi is a badass, that’s very important, long live Boldsushi.

Ma meilleure ennemie by @falloutjuli [Words: 13k | Chapters: 1/1 | M]

I swear I keep stumbling upon this author by accident without realizing I know them and I keep being blown away by their work. If the Arcane reference title is not enough for you, this is a little story about Aku and Atsu being thrown into an unforeseen Parisian vacation, where they dance and get that 'oh, oh' moment. Absolutely perfectly in-character dialogue, with many funny and even more heartfelt moments, all spiced up with the classic sskk banter.

So let us stop talkin' falsely now, The hour's getting late by FallOutJuli (again) [Words: 17k | Chapters: 1/1 | T]

This story made me so happy, an instant fix for a bad day at work that I still remember and am grateful for. Slow burn 1920s AU with reporter Atsushi and singer Akutagawa, great banter and even greater collaboration between those two, gradually growing closer and learning they can trust and be good for each other, both finding a muse in the other.

all is finally quiet by @aurorahrt [Words: 2.5k | Chapters: 1/1 | M]

“Did you,” Akutagawa breathes, gasping as Atsushi presses the palms of his hands into Akutagawa’s shoulders, “know you were going to live?” “No,” Atsushi whispers, leaning close, eyes sharp. “I had a feeling, but… no. Did-,” “No.”

There is simply no better collection of words to express my feelings than this quote. Please read this if you need something to soothe your heart after chapter 121.5, or just in general for an introspective character study focused on the ever so complicated relationship of sskk, flourished with beautifully written domestic fluff, anxieties and quiet comfort, soft kisses and even softer words of reassurance. I am almost tearing up again just writing this silly tiny review, those two have my heart and more.

And that’s a wrap, see you in another half year when I possibly sort through 100 fics more! All of the above mean a lot to me, so please check them out if anything from my passionate ramblings catches your eye. And go give the authors some love, they’re doing god’s work here <3

tell me about the as we dance in the pale moonlight fic :000 from the ask game

That's the most boring WIP I have lmao 😭 but sure :D

It's a fluffy, kinda indulgent, oneshot I'm writing where Atsushi and Akutagawa simply just spend a night together. And, can you believe it, they end up dancing in the ✨moonlight✨

Idk I just love the idea of sskk dancing together but with no music and like, it's just *them*, together. It's peaceful and I love peaceful sskk

Here's a snippet (and no I don't know how to get italics on Tumblr 🙏 bear with me and my asterisks);

Akutagawa watched his red blood swirl down the drain of the sink, the pain from his injuries stinging lightly. He quietly sighed and looked in the mirror.

His black and white hair was messy, his skin was paler than usual and the bags under his eyes weren't helping with his tired appearance.

Akutagawa had gotten back from a mission, bloody and bruised, and gone to the bathroom almost immediately to wash his wounds and bandage himself up. 

He heard a knock on the door, before a voice spoke up.

"Ryuu?"

Akutagawa felt the corner of his mouth twitch up. Hearing Atsushi's voice made his muscles relax. He loved being able to come back to his apartment and Atsushi was there to greet him. 

"Yes, weretiger?" He answered back, turning off the tap and drying his hands on a towel. 

"Are you alright?" Atsushi, on the other side of the door, creased his eyebrows as his tiger-honed ears caught the sound of the water shutting off. He knew it was inevitable for Akutagawa to have been injured someway or another, that was just the nature of ex-vampire's job, but it didn't mean he wouldn't *worry.*

"I am fine," Akutagawa reassured in his weary voice. He unspooled the bandages and wrapped them gently around his raw, but now clean, wounds. 

Atsushi let out a small sigh of relief, he couldn't help it. After a few quiet moments, Akutagawa swung open the door with a loose tendril of Rashomon and was greeted with the sight of a very concerned weretiger.

The white-haired detective immediately assessed Akutagawa's bandages and how bad they appeared.

"Weretiger, I said *I am fine,*" Akutagawa repeated, knowing what was crossing Atsushi's mind.

He cupped Atsushi's face in his hands and looked his boyfriend in the eye, Akutagawa's silver glare turning soft as he met the weretiger's upset gaze. 

"You don't *look* fine." Atsushi grumbled, leaning into Akutagawa's calloused yet lithe touch. 

~~

Yeah I have no idea what the heck that even is, it's definitely not my best work 😭

Also anyone seeing this post can ask me about my other WIPs I'm very lonely and want to talk about writing 😔

"and then..."

AND THEN WHAT AKUTAGAWA

YOU REALIZED YOU DIDN'T HATE HIM? YOU REALIZED HE MEANT THE WORLD TO YOU? YOU REALIZED HE VALUED YOU? YOU REALIZED YOU CARED ABOUT HIM? YOU REALIZED THAT HE WAS YOUR EQUAL?

oh my god chapter 122 is killing me it's amazing

If the actual end of the sentence is "and then I realized I love him" I WILL LOSE MY SHIT.

Do not fucking even try the argument "but Akutagawa hates Atsushi" with me

I will only respond with these panels. And probably an entire essay on their entire relationship but still