This Pain Wears Many Faces

BALLAD OF FALLEN ANGELS

COWBOY BEBOP (1998) dir. Shinichirō Watanabe

Francis Alys: Sometimes Making Something Leads to Nothing (1997)

Falling Star, 1884, by Witold Pruszkowski (1846-1896)

can you do one about feeling lost/like you don’t know what your own identity is?

I THINK I'VE LOST MYSELF SOMEWHERE ALONG THE WAY

emilie möri / angels in america / poietike / mahmoud darwish / fernando pessoa / emily dickinson / fernando pessoa / francine pascal / darker than erebus / alex dimitrov / clarice lispector

i am a different person than who i was last year. my hair is longer and i cry less and i am stronger. i am a different person than who i was six months ago. i am free and different and am embracing change. i am a different person than who i was a month ago. i sit in the sunlight without worry and i don’t let things stick and i look up and smile. i am a different person than who i was last week. i explore more and look at the sky and laugh more. i am a different person than who i was yesterday. i let go and breathe. i am whole.

Clementine Chalfant by Matias Alfonzo for Carnale Room October 2022

“I apply my personality in a paste.”

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004) dir. Michel Gondry

—The significance of Clementine’s hair colour—

green (Green Revolution): spring, nature, blooming. She had green hair when she first met Joel meaning it’s a new fresh beginning and the start of something beautiful.

red (Red Menace): summer, love, desire. When she is in a relationship with Joel we see her with her red hair, she’s in love and in a passionate relationship.

orange (Agent Orange): fall, autumn leaves, faded red. Her intense relationship starts to fade and the desire is not all there anymore, the couple fights a lot.

blue (Blue Ruin): winter, sadness, freshness. She meets Joel again and they fall for each other all over again, their love story comes full circle.

i don't think i'm the same person i was a month ago but also don't think that i know who i am at all