Melanchollymonkey - Mutual Mass Confusion

"Sometimes yearning hits me hard and I so wish I was with you now and that I could hug you and feel the warmth of your chest and the strength of your arms. To inhale you into my lungs and infuse you into my blood. The distance between our bodies unbearable when the distance between our hearts is none. And I ask, "Why," and I get no answer and the insurmountable silence weighs on my soul. Days like these, instants like these are so hard to bear. I am a flower buried under snow. Eyes unseeing, heart beating on, despite the cold, only hope driving me on with unwavering faith, certain that one day into spring's arms I will rise again."

e.v.e. (Letters to my love)

💔🦍💔

Not knowing where this will lead scares me, but the thought of losing you scares me even more.

— Letters from S

IT WASN’T SUPPOSED TO END THIS WAY.

everybody disappeared when i needed them the most

even the ones that said they’d always be there for me

Feeling lost in loss.

I wish I were able to articulate myself when speaking to you. I love you so much. I have loved you since we were just friends, flirting with each other across the table. My love for you has omy grown since then, & continues to grow, even if my heart is broken. I am sorry I ever let you feel I Was not interested or no longer loved you. I tend to get sucked into a pattern of comfort & familiarity, & since you don't say anything, I figure were good. NEVER BELIEVE I DONT Love You. You are my everything. I have no idea where we go from here, but I pray its together. I have no family, & few friends, & To lose you I would be losing a great friend and even better lover. Not even counting how much Id miss the Puppy Monkey Baby. I love you so much & hope you still love Me & are willing to Mend our relationship. I truly feel we only need to learn to talk to each other. I know it sounds easier than it is/will be, but I want you with me forever. I would ask you to marry me, if you werent still married, & I had my shit together enough to deserve a wife such as you I just hope you stick with me until I get myself back on track. I know you have been patient & given more time for me to do this, than most people would put up with, & I thank you for this. I just ask you to keep on believing in us & Ill get it together as soon as I can. I love you more than I have ever loved anyone before, & truly believe you are my One. Never doubt my love for you. Never think Im going to leave you, Never think ive lost interest. You are always with me. In my heart, mind,& soul. Even if Im not so good at expressing it. Know it to be true. I am totally & utterly in love with & love you.

“Say you want me too.”

— Lana Del Rey

What am I doing wrong?