Matt-w-blogging - Matt

ROY-G-BIV? No, my rainbow is R?J-R-PLV

Just Janus Being Relatable In My Band AU Fic

(When nobody else could open the envelope) Janus rolled their eyes, picking up the letter and opening it. "Dear..."

“I feel like Batman. I must go, Gaythem needs me. But Remus you’re coming with me.”

“Oh, I feel the love. I was singing too, where's my hug?”

“I’m not judging you. I’m just, well, judging you."

“If you want to talk, we’re here to listen."

“I’m polyamorous. That's not my thing, I’m still thinking, I just wanted to help move the attention off of you, um, ‘cuz Remus already knows that, um…"

“Put that on your resume. 'You’re good at that,’ Roman Prince."

“Who are these kids? I just wanna talk," Janus said, cracking their knuckles.

“For the record, you're perfectly valid."

Fun fact! My doctor actually did this when my brother and I were kids, he made really good bird noises like I mean actually convincing ones cuz as a kid I was like 'there can't be birds in my head that's impossible but where is the sound coming from?!?'

Occasionally he'll still do it, just joking around because we're not kids anymore and we know there aren't birds in our heads

(Anyway this post was inspired by a recent trip to the doctor to get my eardrums checked—)

Remus and Logan: *playing Hell Chess*

Patton and Janus: *teleport in*

Janus: LOGAN! Tell Patton he does not have birds in his head!

Patton: Logan!! Tell Janus he doesn't know everything!

Logan, raising an eyebrow: What?

Patton: So, whenever my doctor examines my ears, these little birds tweet! He says I have a little family of birds living in my head!

Janus: Correction, to make Patton sit still during checkups, his doctor makes bird noises and pretends to check on birds in his head instead of his ears.

Patton: Hey, I'm perfectly still! I don't want him to poke a bird!

Janus: *gestures wildly at him*

Logan, completely serious: Oh, no, I'm afraid you're wrong here, Janus. I've seen Patton's medical records, he has a small family of birds living in his head and has for years. It's a harmless condition.

Janus: *stares at him in WTF manner*

Patton: Ha! I told you! Devon and his family ARE in my head!

Remus: What's in my head?

Logan, no hesitation: A single rat on a wheel. His name is Maurice.

Remus: Is he a space cowboy?

Logan: And a gangster of love.

Remus, grinning: Cool.

Patton: Ooh! What's in Roman's head?

Logan, also no hesitation: A frog named Roberto.

Patton: Awesome! I'm going to tell him.

Patton: *sinks out*

Janus: WHY.

Logan, smiling mischievously: You've got a transgendeer in yours.

Janus: MOTHERF—

Breaking News: World-Class Soft Pretzel Maker Invents New Solution To Dip Pretzels In Before Baking

The baker is quoted as saying the usual baking-soda-and-water method was "too basic for [their] taste"

Today on Things I Know Because Of Thomas Sanders:

My family: *Discussing berries*

My dad: Isn't a marionberry a cross between a loganberry and a blackberry?

Me: That sounds redundant, considering a loganberry is already a cross between a blackberry and a raspberry...

Them: What? Did you look that up?

Me: No I already knew that

Them: *doubt*

My brother: *looks it up* Nah he's right

Them: *surprise*

Them: How'd you know that?

Me, out loud: Eh just a random fact I know

Me, internally: 'Cuz Crofters is the only jelly—

So thank you @thatsthat24 , I looked smart in front of my extended family today because of one of the many things Logan taught me :D

Quackity: Hey everyone this is my bestie Bad he loves to swear and say things like fuck, please teach him some curse words in Spanish—

Also Quackity: Oh my god, Dan, I'm so sorry! I forgot you made family-friendly content and now we're all swearing! Your image! I'm so sorry!

Truly the duality of man

Conversation: Turns to Harry Potter

Patton: Hey Logan, what house do you think I would be in?

Logan: Oh well I'd say Hufflepuff

Patton: Why?

Logan, confused that he asked for elaboration: Well, Hufflepuffs are known for being friendly and loyal and liking a sense of community and family... Also your need to follow morals exactly and get confused because you don't know what morally right sometimes seems the most Hufflepuff to me...

Patton: Oh, that makes sense

Roman: What house would I be?

Logan, realizing they actually want to hear him rant about his hyperfixation, lighting up: Well—

Ranboo-flavored plush (with bean pouch inside along stuffing so it's weighted)

How Remus Describes The Other Sides

From a bit in a fic I wrote; basically, Janus sent a letter to a "new dark side" (its dark!Logan) that showed up explaining—

Y'know what I'll just put in the whole excerpt

Welcome to the ‘dark side.’ There are two of us here and four on the ‘light side.’ Fair warning, most of the others don't like us. More details on that and the main things that have happened if you missed it on the back. I look forward to meeting you, it has been quiet ever since Virgil (Now Anxiety, previously Paranoia) left. There's no rush to come out, though. Take your time. — Janus, Self-Preservation (Nicknamed ‘Deceit’)

He flipped it over, seeing a thorough but quick explanation of the split, Virgil switching sides, who the others were, why the lights didn't like the darks, etc. Janus had very nice handwriting.

It was really… Sweet. Nobody had ever been so considerate towards Logan in his life.

...

Hiya! Figured Jan already did the important introduction, professional and shit, but here's whatcha gotta know about the others—

Roman: My brother, kinda! Very dramatic, title is Creativity, his color is red, he always has his sword and knows how to use it so beware! He dresses like a Disney prince. Minus the crown. He has one. He just doesn't wear it.

Janus: You probably got a good gauge of his personality from his letter, his color is yellow, his title is Self-Preservation but the others always call him Deceit (he’s never corrected them), he's got some scales so don't be freaked out when you see him for the first time (y’know those Catholics and their lying snakes)

Me!: I usually write on neon paper didn't wanna ‘til I knew if you were okay with it, I’m Creativity but the non-socially-accepted Creativity so like intrusive thoughts and such, my color is green, I have a morning star fair warning though I hardly use it on people (never used it on anyone but Roman)

Patton: He’s Morality, he’s very confused about a lot of things, loves cats but he’s allergic, color is light blue, scared of spiders (which is hilarious cuz he loves Virgil), he pretends he’s the dad of the group and calls the others kiddo but he’s just a kid that had to grow up too fast and is now way out of his depth but scared to ask for help??? he wears glasses

Virgil: He’s Anxiety, used to be Paranoia when he was a dark side but then he got a redemption arc and now they love him, his color is purple, he loves spiders, he’s got really intense eyeshadow under his eyes, he’ll probably hiss at you when he first sees you

Logan: Ah, Logan. His title is Logic, and he’s truly the only light side with any braincells. However they NEVER FUCKING LISTEN TO HIM LIKE WTF sorry Thomas is such a dumbass it pisses me off being he! should! just! listen! to! Logan! and! he! wouldn't! have! half! these! problems! but nooOOOOoooOOoooo he’s gotta be a fucking idiot all the time, anyway Logan’s color is indigo he wears glasses he wears a black button-up and a blue striped tie and he’s the only light side worth talking to tbh

He teared up, reading the section about him. Remus got it. He understood how he felt. It was a bit confusing how he described him in more detail than the others, but he quickly moved past that, realizing Remus had forgotten to sign his name and chuckling a little.

(end of excerpt)

Here ya go

I was thinking about Sapnap's name and how it used to be Pandas and was supposed to be Pandas backwards

Anyway

I was like 'it's not really Pandas though... what would Pandas backwards be?' and I realized that Pandas backwards is Sadnap

Which, like

Yeah I can see why he didn't chose Sadnap as his name