Please Help- TWOC In Need

Two-bit: Flirting is my heritage.

Johnny: What does that mean?

Steve: His father was a slut too.

Problem: Jason Statham has 2 decades on Vanessa Kirby and yet in a flashback in Hobbs & Shaw their characters are shown as being close in age.

Easy solution: Hattie is aging incredibly well & is much older than she appears

Funny solution: Deckard is actually in his mid thirties and is aging like pure shit because his life is hell and the stress is causing him to shrivel up like an apple doll

alternatives to "ladies and gentlemen"

cads and wastrels

fellow scoundrels

ladies, gentlemen, and interesting miscellanea

beloved friends & tolerated acquaintances

entities of interest

paying audience members & assorted freeloaders

the fbi's most and least wanted

discerning guests & those of you with fuck all else to do on a tuesday evening

esteemed gutter filth

Deckard, running into Sam’s room: Do you want to make $5?

Sam: How?

Deckard: I need you to take the blame for something.

Luke, from the hallway: Oh my god!

Sam: What did you do?

Deckard: I can’t tell you. Yes or no, no questions asked.

Luke: OH MY GOD!

Sam: Make it $10.

Fast and Furious Memes (1/x): Hobbs & Shaw edition

Bonus:

Chapters: 15/20 Fandom: Fast and the Furious Series, 2 Fast 2 Furious (2003), Fast & Furious 6 (2013) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Brian O'Conner/Carter Verone, end game Brian O'Conner/Owen Shaw Characters: Brian O'Conner, Dominic Toretto, Owen Shaw, Letty Ortiz, Carter Verone, Agent Stasiak, Agent Penning Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, FBI profiler! Dom, FBI Agent Jesse, FBI team Toretto, Villian!Shaw, Oblivious Brian, Violence, Explicit Language, Grey Carter, Fusion - The Blacklist, Rising rating Series: Part 1 of FF Collection Summary:

Owen Shaw has surprisingly surrendered himself to the FBI. The FBI are ecstatic until they realise that they will not be able to keep Shaw in their hands. He offers them a consolation he wants their help in hunting down a list of personal enemies. Sounds good, right? There is one catch … He will talk only to Brian O’Connor - and Penning is like, “Who?”

Hey Omni! After seeing your content and you mentioning Owen in physiotherapy.

I thought about maybe the crew and his siblings helping him through it!

Aww! That'd be really wholesome! And gosh, Owen would be so embarrassed having to be helped by that many people

~~~

Dom leaned against the doorway leading into the living room and watched as Owen sat with Jack, who excited talked to him. Owen was lifting small weights, working on his arm strength

Every day, Owen was getting stronger. But it also seemed like he was getting just as restless

Owen had been with them for a few months now, ever since they had smuggled him out of the hospital. It had been difficult to sneak out someone who could barely walk out of the country undetected, but they had

And Dom didn't really regret it

The whole time Owen had been in that coma, it had broken Dom's heart to see how much Letty struggled. She would constantly fly back and forth between London and LA to see him

He was family to her, and she wasn't going to let him go

When she had come back, a mixture of tears and a smile, Dom knew it was time to make a decision

They would take Owen in as part of the crew. Whether he liked it or not

Luck seemed to be on their side, because Owen didn't remember anything about them. The Nightshade heist was wiped from his memory and how he had ended up in a coma

Owen had readily accepted their help, especially when he saw how much Letty trusted them

Months later, it felt as if Owen had been part of their crew since forever. Brian and Mia had accepted him and enjoyed how much he and Jack got along. Especially when Owen helped Jack with his ADHD

Dom was just worried what would happen when Owen was completely recovered

Would he want to stay with them?

Dom got his answer a week later

---

"Dom, I keep telling you, you have to wash the pans before putting them in the dishwasher!" Letty complained as she scrubbed at a pan

Dom simply grunted as he worked side by side her to scrub another pan. There was a reason he hated doing chores

They were so focused on each other, it took them a minute to notice they had an audience

"Let? Nic?"

Shutting off the water, they both turned to see Owen standing in the doorway. He still couldn't run, but he was able to stand by himself and walk unassisted

"What's up, Oh?" Letty asked, drying her hands

"Do you remember my brother's number? Or my Mum's?"

Dom blinked in surprise. He didn't even know Owen had a brother

"I have your brother's, but I wasn't sure if he was in a safe place to be contacted." Letty quietly admitted

"Even if he's not, he'll take the risk." Owen nodded. "I need to talk to him."

"Sure, Oh."

Letty handed her phone over and they watched him leave the room, phone to his ear

"Deck?"

Frowning, Dom looked down at Letty

"Why didn't you tell me he had family?"

Letty was still staring at where Owen was, biting her lip

"Because his brother is on the run from the law. He's done a lot worse than Owen and doesn't want to lead that trouble to Owen. I didn't want either of them risking their lives for each other."

"And now?"

"Looks like they're going to do it anyway." Letty sighed

---

It was another two weeks when Deckard and Hattie Shaw showed up

They were having their weekly barbecue. Jack had dragged Owen around the yard, leaving him breathless. Dom had raised an eyebrow when he saw Roman being the one to rush to Owen's side and help him sit

He shared a smirk with Brian, both nodding in agreement about the hopefully, future couple

They were all sitting down to eat when there was a shout from the driveway

"Owen!"

Owen had shot to his feet, but wobbled for a second. The rest of the crew followed suit, Roman standing next to Owen to take his weight if need be

"Deck!" Owen called back instead, not even noticing the protective stance the crew was taking around him

Around the corner came a man and woman, both looking pissed off

"Hatts?" Owen blurted out. He shoved away from the crew and slowly made his way over to the strangers

Dom's eyebrows rose when the two wrapped Owen in a strong embrace. The man cupped the back of Owen's head and brought their foreheads together

It was honestly touching watching the tearful exchange

After a minute, Owen pulled back enough to whisper to the man and woman. He pulled completely away, one of their hands in each of his

"Guys," he called out to the crew in a wide smile. "I'd like you to meet my brother and sister. Deckard and Hattie."

Everyone was silent as they took in two more Shaws

"Fuck. There's three?" Han mumbled, speaking everyone's thoughts

~~~

I hope you enjoyed friend!

Hello Omni! Ik Friday was yesterday, so you can answer whenever. What do you think Owen did to get dishonourbly discharged? And did he do it on purpose?

I was actually thinking about this lately, and I am in firm belief that Owen absolutely, 100% did it on purpose

I like to think that Owen only left the military when Deckard was framed and on the run

Owen was seeing red

MI6 came around and interrogated Owen, trying to find Deckard, but he didn't know anything. Seeing these people hunting his brother down like a dog had Owen wanted to burn the world down

And that's what he did

He only did enough planning to get enough bombs and know where to place them

Owen stormed into MI6 and set the place ablaze

You do not mess with a Shaw, not unless you want to get burned

Owen went full John Wick on MI6. They lost a lot of good agents

Of course, this meant that the military had to discharge Owen cause he's now an international criminal

And from there, Owen didn't look back. He continued to terrorize MI6 for years while pulling heists

Thanks for the question friend!

Because @omnivorousshipper requested Naga Rowen!

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