Deckard, Running Into Sam’s Room: Do You Want To Make $5?

Luke, to Deckard: Tell her.

Deckard, to Sam: I apologize for saying “fuck” earlier.

Sam: You just said it again.

Deckard: I am not a role model.

Sam: Obviously.

Reblog if Black Lives Matter to you

Where are those woke white people at!?

The fact that Luke Hobbs and Deckard Shaw didn’t have a big reunion embrace and finally pay off on all of that sexual tension is the biggest crime in the Fate of the Furious movie.

Au where Deckard and Luke are raising young Samantha together: Sammy learns her first bad word, Owen's laughing hysterically and Hattie's barely hiding her snickers, while Luke and Hobbs are trying to 1) find out who taught her that (spoiler: it was accidentally them) and 2) how to get her to stop.

😂 I love it!! And I love the idea of Sam being raised by the Shaws and her dad

~~~

Yawning widely, Owen stumbled towards the kitchen in hopes that Deckard had already made breakfast. He could hear several voices and assumed that Sam was just being fussy with her own food again

She had gotten to the age where throwing food was much more amusing that eating it

Owen remembered that age fondly

But, as he stepped into the kitchen, he was met with an odd scene

Both Luke and Deckard were standing in front of Sam, who was laughing and clapping her hands. She was innocently sitting in her high chair as they talked to her

Or begged, as it seemed

Hattie was leaning against a counter watching the whole thing and covering her mouth. But Owen could still hear her small snickers

"What's going on?" Owen whispered, sliding up next to her and watched the show

"Shit!"

Owen's eyebrows skyrocketed as his niece shouted the curse word

"Sammy, love, please don't say that word. It's a bad word, and we can't say bad words." Deckard explained and looked to tired to keep doing so to the toddler

"Shit!"

"Sam, that's a bad word." Luke weakly protested

Who knew their one weakness would be a two year old

Just the sight of the two strongest people Owen knew trying to convince a toddler not to swear was too much

Owen burst out laughing

"Hey! This isn't funny!" Luke barked. "Did you teach her that word?"

Owen took a gasping breath as he shook his head and continued laughing

"Hatts didn't teach her and Oh didn't, so where did she learn it?" Deckard huffed

"Probably from one of you two." Hattie drawled

"What? I don't swear in front of her!" Luke glared

"She's a sneaky little bugger," Owen pointed out. "You could have said it when you didn't know she was there."

"Bullsh-"

"Luke!" Deckard yelped

"Shit!" Sam happily finished for him

Deckard covered his face with his hands and let out a low moan of despair

"Sammy, if you stop saying that word, I'll give you some special chocolate." Deckard told the toddler with a defeated air

"Deck! You can't just bribe our daughter!" Luke scolded

"Got a better plan?" Deckard hissed

"Choco!" Sam whined and made grabby hands towards Deckard

"A true blackmail artist." Owen chuckled. "A perfect fit into the Shaw family."

Luke glared at him while Deckard left to retrieve a piece of chocolate from his secret stash

~~~

I hope you enjoyed friend!

Darry: What did. You do?

Two-Bit: Alright, but you can't get mad at me.

Darry: What did. You do?

Two-Bit: So I was minding my own business-

Darry: *slams hand down on the table* BULLSHIT.

Two-Bit: I WAS!

brian: please hold me. the stress isn't good for the baby

dom: what baby??

brian: me. i'm the baby

Here’s another silly video ^^

was inspired by this reel on insta

Luke: What’s your blood type?

Deckard: How would I know?

Luke: How would you not?

Deckard: Who am I? Karl Landsteiner, discoverer of blood groups?

Luke: You don’t know your own blood type, but you know who discovered them?

DID YOU SEE THE NEW TEASER TRAILER FOR F9???? I AM SO EXCITED!!!! More mama Shaw! Letty missing her old life and being excited to get back into action! HAN!!!!

NO?! I DID NOT KNOW A NEW TEASER CAME OUT!!

BUT OMG, MORE MAMA SHAW??

THE MOVIE ADDRESS LETTY MISSING HER FAST LIFE??

HAN???

Thanks for telling me friend 😭 I now know what I'll be obsessing over for the next few days weeks months

So to add to the fics I really would love to read/write for this fandom: I need one that just features the Shaw siblings and their various cons.