Im Bored.  Let's Go On Tumblr.

hey

guess what

you’re so close to surviving 2018

you can make it

i’m so proud that you’re still here

keep going buddy

i love you

The thing about Cottagecore is that is a fetishized aesthetic of country life, divorced from labor and idealized by a primarily urban audience with a backward looking ethos of tradition. They are not prepared for the stresses of a rural life: farming; harvesting; tapping pumpkins to ensure none of them have been replaced with flesh; losing out on income by having to use one of your pigs in a blood sacrifice to paint protective sigils over your doors and windows; checking cracks and chimneys for the flesh-vines of the Pumpkin Lord; having to decide, before the Growth is complete, whether that's really your tradwife or an amassment of vines, leaves, and blood in the shape of your tradwife; ignoring their desperate pleas that "I'm me! No! No!" as you burn them alive, realizing too late you picked wrong; and the exploitative corporate nature of commercial farming in 2024. All seen through a deeply colonial lens, of course

Vintage women being badass. You’re welcome.

I feel like death if death was on her period and just got hit by a bus.

Headcanon Accepted

hello, it’s ur friendly half latina here to remind u that in the lightning thief percy takes a taxi to east 104th and first for his apartment which is a corner in east harlem aka “spanish harlem/el barrio”, one of the largest latino communities in nyc (only 7.3% white) meaning it’s actually very likely that percy is latino :)))

This game is fun and i cqnt stop playing

Dan and Phil, Thank you for making my life so much more amazing and not on fire😉

The second she was born I had to be a good mother, because otherwise she would turn into a serial killer, and no mother wants that for her child. After all, killing is my job.

Jenny Slate in Stage Fright (2019) // Ugly, Bitter, and True by Suzanne Rivecca // Hayao Miyazaki in 10 Years with Hayao Miyazaki (2019) // Mirrorball by Taylor Swift // John Mulaney on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert (2020)

You know that John Mulaney quote, “the things crazy people say mean nothing to them, but everything to me”?

Now, every time I get on the school elevator, I think of that.  So for backstory, I sprained my ankle when I fell down the stairs about a month ago, this granted me access to the elevator in my school.  A couple of days ago I was waiting to get on the elevator to my fourth block class when a girl wearing sweatpants, a sweatshirt, a messy bun, and socks and sandals approaches me.  In one hand, she held a McDonald's milkshake or frappe of some sort, and in the other, a paper plate with some folded over paper towels stacked on it.  “Hey, can I ride with you? I’m lazy.”  I smile and say “yeah, of course!” because we’ve all been there (and I don’t like confrontation.)

While we are waiting for the elevator she asks me, “Hey, do you like bacon?”

“Yes?”

“Do you want some?  I made it in foods.” She said, unfolding the paper towel.

Now, I have been told many times by my parents not to take candy from creepy old men in sketchy vans, but I have never been warned about not taking bacon from a teenage girl.  That thought and the fact that she was offering me free food made me say “yeah” and take the bacon.

The elevator door opens up and we get in.  The door closes and after a brief conversation about what floor we’re going to she says, “Hey, can I tell you something gross, but kind of cool?”

“Sure,” I said, now questioning my judgment and critical thinking skills.

The elevator had a little gap between the sidewall and the wall with the door and buttons, in this gap, is a bunch of nasty splatters of god knows what.  She points to one of the splatters and asks,” You know what that is?”

I shook my head.

“That's a loogie.  Do you know who made that?  I made that.  Freshmen year.  I’m a senior now.  Just shows you how much they clean this place.”

The elevator door opens.  “See ya.”  She gets out of the elevator, and I’m still standing there, frozen in shock and in utter disbelief at what had just happened, half a piece of bacon in my hand, which I was now hesitant to eat.  When she was bacon girl it was fine, but now shes loogie girl.  Anyway, I walk to my class, bacon in hand, as like, I dunno, proof that it happened, that I wasn’t dreaming.