Things I Expect Every Woman Above 17 To Know.

I want to be bread 😭😭😭😭😭😭

It's not fair

hold on a second man…

Hello there. I find you blog extremely inspiring.

I myself am something of a "former gifted kid". Back in school I was at the top of the grade, best skin, many skills etc etc. And though I'm still *extremely* young (~20) I've descended into a hellish level where I look disgusting, can't study properly or am performing poorly, my hobbies are all well and good but I can't spare time to do some actual intense projects like I used to, I couldn't get into med school this year and yeah. I just feel like shit. I'm trying my best to rebuild my life. Sorry for the rambling.

Everyone has their up and down cycles. This too shall pass.

Whenever you’re struggling/ having a hard time sticking to a routine, there is only one solution. Break your goals down to not more than 3, which can be achieved in a year.

One. your most important goal seems to be med school. What are the two-three habits that you need in order to achieve that?

two. Unless your school counsellor or advisor has recommended you take on intense projects, I think it would be a better use of your time to focus primarily on med school. Eliminate distractions and things that do not directly contribute to your main goal of getting into college.

if med school is not in the books anymore, talk to counsellors, advisors, alumni, teachers, and most importantly - figure out what it is you truly want to do in your career.

three. If med school is still your top choice, and you want to try again…. If you can’t study properly, stop studying the way you have been your whole life. There’s no one single way of studying properly. You can create a schedule that’s a mix of flash cards, videos, Quizlet, tv shows that are directly related to your career choice, podcasts, magazines, books, tv interviews… If any of my followers have any more suggestions for OP, shoot below!

and lastly. It’s okay to not look like a beauty pageant 24/7. Like I said, make your routine simple. A 20 minute run, a weekly face mask, focusing on skincare (face wash, toner, sunscreen and moisturiser is more than enough at your age), showering regularly, eating loads of veggies and fruits, drinking water - what goes inside your body is more important than how you look outside. The second you fix your inside, your outside gets fixed.

Half the game is getting yourself out of environments that no longer serve you & that don’t align with the life you want

One of the hardest parts about trauma is overcoming hyper-independence and understanding that you don’t have to do everything by your own strength. That there’s no virtue in suffering and doing everything entirely on your own. That it’s okay to have expectations for how you want others to show up in your life, and those expectations don’t make you a burden. That having faith means letting go of the belief that everything is in your hands and instead trusting your future to someone greater than you.

Overcoming hyper-independence is a journey in itself.

mid march mantra

Zendaya photographed by Raoul Alejandre.

Any advice for how to deal with people being entitled to know your business? I'm often accused of being guarded and standoffish when really I'm just setting up boundaries. For example, I've been working towards an advanced degree for 3 years now. I have a well thought out, elaborate plan to achieve my goals. This is my business but people still get upset when they look at my life and say "you're not doing anything with your life". To them it looks like I just go to work and travel.

I say that I'm working towards something. But this never shuts them up. Then the questions "Well what is it?! What are you doing?! Do you have a plan?! Have you applied to school yet?! Have you thought about this, this, this and this?!!" They always word the questions like I'm incompetent and lack foresight. I always feel cornered when this happens, like my agency has been taken away. I usually just end up explaining my long, drawn out plan to them and I feel ran over afterwards. I've had people literally get mad and lash out when I keep details to myself. "What's with the attitude? I'm just asking a question, you don't need to give me an attitude." So it's easier to just give in.

"This is my business but people still get upset when they look at my life and say "you're not doing anything with your life". To them it looks like I just go to work and travel."

Why not just let them be upset? 70% of people who knew me in the past still think I'm broke and not doing anything with my life and I just go along with it. Let them create their own thoughts and ideas and tell them that they're absolutely right. At the end of the day what they think about you just isn't your business.

"I say that I'm working towards something. But this never shuts them up."

Unless they are someone important that you might need to use in the future, it's totally unnecessary to let them know anything at all.

"They always word the questions like I'm incompetent and lack foresight. I always feel cornered when this happens, like my agency has been taken away."

Because it is taken away. Corner them instead, let them know you're living on autopilot with no current ambitions. Like I said if they are no one important to you WHO CARES???

"So it's easier to just give in."

It's actually much much easier to let them think what they want... don't let yourself feel pressured and cave in. You can literally make up any lie and say that your focused on becoming a yoga teacher or something.... anythingggggg.

It’s important to reiterate how crucial it is to keep your goals to yourself. Even to family members and friends, just keep it to yourself lol. A goal of yours that may sound crazy and bizarre to them may be aspirational to you, and hearing these unsolicited opinions from others really isn’t beneficial to your journey.