Latest Posts by madampizzadog - Page 3

"Wylan’s first thought was that this boy had the most perfectly shaped lips he’d ever seen. His second was that his father had sent someone new to kill him."

~ Wesper's first meeting in Crooked Kingdom

Or as I like to say. Wylan van Eck having his priorities in order.

First: be gay

Second: worry about potentially dying

The Onion pulling zero fucking punches.

The Onion’s journalism is the only journalism that matters. Holy fuck.

So I heard you wanted to learn some gay slang from the 18th century

Saints! Prepare your ships: Shadow and Bone season two is launching soon, and the cast will be answering some of your burning questions during their Answer Time on March 16th at 12pm PT / 3pm ET. 

Submit questions here.

KAZZLE DAZZLE: The fandom nickname for Kaz Brekker, due to his sparkling personality.

This is a picture of my friend Becky. She used to be a happy, popular girl until one night she snorted marijuana at a party. She died instantly. Please, don’t do marijuana. It’s the most dangerous drug out there. Please don’t wind up like Becky.

"Surprise!" Baz singsongs. "It's your ex-boyfriend and his boyfriend and that girl you never liked very much!"

"Agatha likes me fine!" Penny sounds offended. [...] "I'm worried about her, if you must know. She hasn't been returning my texts."

"Because she doesn't like you, Bunce."

-Rainbow Rowell, Wayward Son

GLAM KITCHEN💄🔥👄Puré de papa🥔 ✨here I am once again giving you my talents for free even though you don’t deserve any of it

Arxdctfvygbuhnijedrftgyhu tysm for tagging meeee

3 ships: FIRST PRINCE (YOU WILL ALWAYS HAVE MY HEART), Wesper and Kanej

1st ever ship: percabethhh

Last song: Shinunoga E-Wa by Fujii Kaze(I'm obsesseddd)

Last movie: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

Currently reading: The Atlas Six, Restore Me, City of Bones, Pride and Prejudice, The Book Thief, The Picture of Dorian Gray, She Who Became the Sun and The Illiad (I have a problem ik)

Currently watching: Sherlock (The Benedict Cumberbatch one)

Currently consuming: Words

Currently craving: Blueberry Cheesecake Ice Cream and Loki Season Two

Tagging: @that-sad-potato @thelarryfanatic @cardanisapest @stuffkimlikes @rowaelinscourt and @highqueenofelfhame

tag 9 people you’d like to get to know better

thank you @defonotacat for tagging me! <3

3 ships: eruri (the most tragic and sexy ship ever), beabato (perfect male wife and girlboss energy) and satorika/labmdabern (killsbians my beloved)

first ever ship: like first ever ever? clara and prince eric, i loved it when i was 3 years old and i still love it now

last song: sleeping beauty op.66 th13 act 1:6 valse

last movie: christmas carol i think

currently reading: before the coffee gets cold by toshikazu kawaguchi

currently watching: nothing, all my shows ended so it's yt time and watching long analysis about stuff i don't really care about

currently consuming: leftover christmas candy

currently craving: to be hugged maybe hah

tagging: @darling-valentine, @satorikas, @minty-muse, @roseofcards90, @svetlushka, @alaiyoooon, @arocinema, @shiomatsuzaka, @not-quitenormal, i hope you don't mind? uwu

✧˚ 𝐔𝐬𝐞𝐟𝐮𝐥 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐬 ༉‧₊˚.

✄ Weaponry

✄ Hypnosis cues

✄ Causes of death

✄ Poisons

✄ Paraphilias

✄ Diseases

✄ Chest injuries

✄ Broken bones

✄ Torture methods

✄ Genetic conditions (common)

✄ Illnesses and disorders (common)

✄ General worldbuilding (...systematic abuse? 👀)

✄ Types of therapy

✄ Manipulation tactics [potential ableism tw]

✄ Types of abuse

✄ Trauma disorders

⎯⎯ ୨♡୧ ⎯⎯

Wanted: Dog Walker

6k words /// Rated G /// Louis/Harry

Louis needs a dog walker. 

Harry answers the ad. 

Written for @1dreversebang with art by @kingsofeverything

"I'm sorry, the old Advika can't come to the phone right now. Why? Oh! Cause she's dead!"

-Me whenever Reputation TV comes out

Today in History: December 14. The Bush shoeing incident

I’m fucking dying. I got roasted in the best way possible.

Morning Doodle: Boring Modern AU, where Zoya and Nikolai are roommates that usually work too much but sometimes make time to play Tekken on Nikolai’s old PS2.

*In the spirit of the original morning doodles, I like to post something super dumb every once in a while.

*some of the legendborn talking about Sel*

Sel: *enters the room*

Someone: Ah speak of the devil

Sel: ExcUse mE I'm not a dEviL I'm a haLf dEmOn learn the difference you uncuLtured swiNe

Me: *has twenty unread books at home*

Me: *buys eight more books*

Me: *re reads red white and royal blue*

I am that person who takes three books to read to school "just in case"

Malina is like Chaolena, in the sense that Mal was also afraid of Alina's powers and could never fully accept them and what they meant. He may have loved the orphan he grew up with, but he could never be with her when she had her powers because he was too afraid of them. And yeah, it turned out fine for him in the end since she lost her powers and all (which I still think is like why would you end the book like that, but that's not what I'm ranting about now), but the powers were a part of her, and as Dorian Havilliard once said, "You cannot pick and choose what parts of her to love."

cardan: let’s talk about the emotions you’re feeling right now

jude: stabby

cardan: stabbing ... isn’t really an emotion, it’s more of an ... activity. which I hope you don’t do to me. see, an emotion is more of a feeling

jude: well maybe i feel stabby

lawyer walks into the court room with their briefcase but it's this

If y'all liked the unidentifiable yellow glitter goo you'll love the time I made wine out of marshmallow Peeps

Kaz brekker is that you?!

Reblog if you're queer, have ADHD, or hate the government.

Nobody needs to know which one.

do you guys think it's possible for a fungus and an algae to on purposed kiss