To My Three Followers,

what joke are you really tryin to tell when you make fun of appalachia and the greater south?

even when you "just" mock our accents (you and i both know what you're really implying when you take on the drawl), the punchline of your joke there is poverty.

those who prefer a more overt route over backhanded implication: when you laugh at our education, or lack thereof, the punchline of your joke is still poverty. systemically underfunded schools packed with underprivileged children who aren't getting the same standards of education as the rest of the country is a real knee slapper boy i tell you what

when you mock our dental health and start quipping about toothless hillbillies, you're still laughin at poverty. appalachia is disproportionately uninsured compared to the rest of the nation. fellas most of us can't afford the privilege of regular, preventative dental visits and checkups, let alone the cost of huge procedures when things finally get dire. beyond that, our poverty is generational. from the get go we inherit bad teeth from family who couldn't afford that shit neither.

in the same vein, when you make fatphobic comments about said disproportionately-uninsured region--one with few jobs available to begin with, let alone work that pays enough to afford wholesome, unprocessed foods that don't rot yer teeth for supper--the butt of your joke is,, u guessed it,, ✨ poverty ✨

but to me the real kicker is the cousin fucker jokes. how can you not see that when you snark about inbreeding, when you piss yourself over that infamous billboard and oh, how could anyone possibly need to be told that?!, your punchline is not only poverty and a lack of education enough to develop critical thinking skills and the ability to build safe support networks, but you're also usually guffawing at incestuous rape and vulnerable children on top of it. peak comedy.

really though, how is any of that funny?

what happens to everyone's class consciousness the moment we start talkin about the hollers n the deep south?

why does health insurance, quality education, and food security for all suddenly go from issues worth fighting for to punishments, and ones we deserve to be humiliated for on top of it?

i know im just a dumb ol hillbilly n all, but i reckon i just don't get what we're supposed to be laughin at here

Life is short. Drink another coffee. Read another book. Listen to your favourite song again. Hug your mom. Laugh. Cry. Dance in the rain. Push your friend off a cliff because of a milkshake.

ITS MINE. ITS MINE. ITS CERTAINLY MINE. IT BELONGS TO MY BOOOOOOYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

For one like I'll share my smash or pass list of famous poets.

(I really want to share it.)

Way of the Water

Should I start talking to y'all about my book? I'm telling y'all about the characters and the world anyways.

Mostly because I want to build a fandom now so someone can eventually draw the twins as sharpay and ryan.

fully sober in the club googling frankenstein 1818 full text

yeah they go way back 🐶🦾

YES THANK YOU TO THE PERSON WHO LIKED THAT POST

i would have shared it anyhow but here:

John Keats is a smash, lord Byron is a smash. Sappho’s a pass only because she’s a chick. If I liked chicks she’d be a smash. But titties are gross. So pass. Edgar Allen poe is a smash but only if you give me enough liquor to forget how much his hairline’s receding. Walt Whitman is a pass, Langston Hughes is a pass. Percy Shelley’s a smash but William Wordsworth is a pass. William Shakespeare is a pass. William Butler Yeats is a smash. T.S. Elliot is a pass. if you give me a shot or two of courage Oscar Wilde is a smash. more because of personality than looks. but i was also talking to my roommate that if given the chance i'd make a WONDERFUL lover to Oscar. i'd treat that man so good. Dante and Milton are both passes. Federico García Lorca is a S M A S H. Thoreau is a pass.  E.E. Cummings is a smash but only until his like early 30’s. young robert frost is a smash. 

My top three hottest from this list are Keats, Wilde, and Lorca, but Keats is only the top because, in my opinion, John is a more moanable name than Oscar. This is what I did instead of paying attention in my intro to lit and film class and working on my American censorship speech for Tuesday.

this is so bad, I need to (remembers suicide jokes worsen my mental health) be distributed by rusty quill under a creative commons attribution non commercial share-alike 4.0 international license

"I think you're worth keeping around/ I think that you're worth holding on to..."

The Captain of Liano's Pearl, Crew Member 1/7

Name: Andy Pergot Morgan

Age: 22

Married to his first mate, Garrett

Parents: Unknown, raised by a pair of pirates from the north from age 16.

Fiercely Loyal to his crew, doesn't go anywhere without a pocket knife, his wedding ring on a chain, and a lighter, would do anything to get his captain back.