Who Else Up Hurkleing Their Durkleing

Vent (TW for mentions of self harm and binge eating)

Work was bad today. Really really bad. Physically painful bad. I feel so invisible and worthless. Not just by management. Of they don't care about any of us. But by my coworkers too. I know I'm different. I know I'm not like them. I feel like I'm their punching bag because I'm different. Then today my parents showed up at my job demanding to see me. I'm no contact with my parents. It was a hard decision to come to and they act like they don't know what "no contact" means. I was angry and scared. What if they forced their way into where I was? What if they caused a scene? I couldn't stop myself from shaking. Thankfully they left after being told twice. It made me worry that they would just wait for me at my house. At any time they could just show up as if I owe them my time. I hate it! I hate it! I hate it! I don't want to deal with this! I want to hurt myself. Instead I bought a bunch of food to binge. Neither option is good...I feel so out of control. I hate my life and I hate myself. I just want to escape somewhere I can be totally safe and happy. I knew that once I got home I was going to drown myself in Ewan McGregor content. It's the only thing right now that I can count on to be there for me. To fill me with happiness. I'm thankful for my mutuals on here and artists, writers, gif makers, and everything in between too. You're creativity and kindness provide the means for my escape from reality. I don't know how to end this. That's all.

i must not kill myself . killing myself is the myself killer

I like wondering what a Scarecrow music video would look like. Also, it's the last song I listened to on Spotify today 😁

I think my top choice for a music video would be DESTROYA. I feel like Gerard would make it a big spectacle filled production like Welcome to the Black Parade but...neon or something lol

What's a song from Danger Days that you wish got a music video?

Scarecrow or an actual plot video of planetary if that’s a possibility :3

just wanna say your movie reviews are underrated. I love how you review ewans movies flawlessly and precisely 🙏your reviews are flawless.

Oh my god! I have no words! 🥹 Thank you so much, dear moot! I'm absolutely touched and encouraged that you enjoy my Ewan reviews! 🥹🫂🫶 Oh my gosh you've made my day 🥰😚

You cooked then ATE! Fucking love this!

Chat please let me know if I cooked

Trigger Warning: Pet Loss

My dog of ten years had to undergo emergency euthanasia today....because it was an emergency, I didn't have the $300 for a private cremation so I don't even get to keep a piece of my friend. I have so many feelings and so much to say. But now that I'm typing, I have no idea anymore. I think maybe what I want now is for people to magically understand everything I'm thinking so that I don't have to try and put it into words. I might share more about my baby's story later. Idk. For now, enjoy these pictures of my best boy.

Thoughts: Attack of the Clones

I've been watching Star Wars Attack of the Clones and got to the scene where Anakin and Padmé are in the meadow. Anakin asks her about her childhood crush or something and she says "Are you gonna use your Jedi mind trick on me?" For whatever reason, her asking that made me wonder if Force-play is a thing in the Star Wars universe and if Padmé was into it. Like, do you think Anakin ever DID try to mind trick her in the bedroom per her request? Do you think that being such a powerful and commanding figure for practically all her life would make her interested in submission? To be able to just turn her mind off and allow someone else, someone she trusts above all others, to control her body? Make decisions for her? It's a thought I found interesting.

sometimes you need dialogue tags and don't want to use the same four

SFW Alphabet: Catcher Block (Down with Love)

shoutout to my bestie @hellsalad for being a listening ear, helpful guide when I got stuck, and general inspiration for me to keep writing 💞

A - Affection (How affectionate is he? How does he show affection?)

Catcher is very affectionate and not afraid to display it publicly. He likes walking arm in arm or with his arm around your waist. When you hold hands, he periodically kisses your knuckles making you feel like royalty.

B - Best Friend (What is he like as a best friend? Where does the friendship start?)

Being best friends with THE Catcher Block means that you can truly say that you have friends in high places. He has the hookup for all the best restaurants, sports games, and nightlife entertainment. There's always something new to do when you're with him. He's a very fun and energetic person to be around. Your friendship began at the Know Magazine office. You were a junior journalist and had the great fortune of being paired with Catcher (much to his chagrin at the time) as your mentor. The friendship had a bit of a bumpy start but you showed a lot of promise in the field and impressed him. Now, it's hard to imagine never being friends!

C - Cuddles (Does he like to cuddle? How does he cuddle?)

Absolutely! He likes when you lay your head on his chest with one leg over his. He holds one of your hands with his and his other is wrapped around you rubbing your back. He's not really into spooning as he likes to see your face.

D - Domestic (Does he want to settle down? How is he at cooking, cleaning, etc?)

He's not eager to settle down preferring instead to enjoy the relationship one day at a time. It being the 60s, he most definitely doesn't ask you to move in with him before he puts a ring on your finger. He's not a good cook and mainly eats out or has the occasional TV dinner. He hired a maid to clean his bachelor pad but still keeps things tidy on his own.

E - Ending (If he had to break up with his partner, how would he do it?)

He would take them out to dinner and rip the bandaid off. He would try to spare their feelings by saying the cliche "it's not you it's me." or get them to to think that breaking up is their idea. He doesn't want the breakup to be nasty so that the door's still open for "sex a la carte" in the future. He's not heartless though, and if the relationship was a deep one then he'd mourn the end in private just like anyone else. (Ice cream and sad movies included).

F - Fiance (How does he feel about commitment? Does he want to get married?)

Catcher avoids commitment like the plague. He likes having many lovers to choose from like a buffet and being tied down would ruin that. He's one of the most desirable and eligible men in New York so he wants to have fun while he still can. Marriage isn't something that ever interested him until he met you. He can't help but feel like the two of you could make a beautiful life together. He's not yet ready to admit these feelings to you but giving up his lifestyle of rotational lovers in favor of exclusivity with you is a start.

G - Gentle (How gentle is he both physically and emotionally)

He's a gentleman so is very gentle physically. Of course he doesn't want to hurt you and loves pampering you at every opportunity. As far as emotional gentleness, he still has some learning to do. It's not that he enjoys hurting your feelings; far from it! But he's brash, arrogant, and used to getting his way which causes him to be insensitive at times especially to things he doesn't understand.

H - Hugs (Does he like hugs? How often does he do it and what are they like?)

He's not really much of a hugger unless you consider his embraces while making out "hugs." Catch doesn't hug often but when he does he usually opts for a side hug or a brief front hug if it's a friend.

I - I Love You (how fast does he say the "L" word?)

"I love you" falls off his lips easily....a little too easily. During his philandering days it wasn't an issue for him to say it to get what he wanted. Now, getting him to say it and mean it is a whole different ball game. Vulnerability is not one of his strengths. While the love he feels for you is genuine, it's still a new feeling for him. Be prepared to wait awhile to hear him confess his love.

J - Jealousy (How jealous does he get? What is he like when jealous?)

Catcher is a jealous man through and through. A bit ironic considering his background. He keeps his cool though and doesn't make a scene. He doesn't need to. Everyone knows who he is. A steely gaze and a snide comment is enough to send a suitor packing. When the two of you go out, you're practically joined at the hip and he makes sure everyone knows you're an item with his public displays of affection.

K - Kisses (What are his kisses like? Where does he like to kiss you? Where does he like to be kissed?)

Kisses with Catch are very heated and he loves making out anytime, anywhere. He likes to kiss a trail from your mouth, down your jaw, to your neck where he lavishes you with tender kisses and gentle bites. He likes to be kissed around his ears. It's a major weakness for him. His whole suave persona crumbles when you kiss the shell of his ear. Give him a nip and nuzzle and he's putty in your hands.

L - Little Ones (How is he around kids?)

Catcher says he wants a big family one day but how he acts tells a different story. Simply put, children and Catcher don't mix. Occasionally, a young boy who looks up to him will ask for an autograph and he'll oblige. Otherwise, he's content to not interact with them. It's in the best interest of his suits after all.

M - Morning (What are mornings like with him?)

Since Catcher started his "New Man" era, he knows that he can't spend the night with you as the temptation to *ahem* get to know you "all the way better" would be too strong. Therefore, on weekdays, your mornings together start at work. If he's not traveling, you share a pot of coffee in his office before starting your hectic workday. You guys chat about how your evening was, how you slept, etc. On weekends, he picks you up to go out for breakfast or you attempt cooking together which is always a fun experience.

N - Night (How are nights spent with him?)

Catcher takes you on a date somewhere new every night! He loves the nightlife and sharing new experiences with you. Sometimes, you like to have a more calm evening by enjoying an intimate dinner before slow dancing to his extensive music collection. He always walks you back to your apartment and you end the night with a lingering kiss.

O - Open (When does he open up about himself?)

When it comes to physical intimacy, Catcher Block is bar none. But emotional intimacy? Well, he's a tough nut to crack. His debonair persona, while flashy and alluring, doesn't have much substance. He is very keen on making sure that people only know about him what he wants them to know. It takes him several weeks to get there so it's very special when he does let his guard down and shares his heart with you fully. This vulnerability usually happens in the quiet moments of life together. Sitting on the veranda watching the sunset, reading together on a rainy day, or enjoying a quiet Sunday breakfast. Moments when he doesn't have to be The Man About Town™️, just your man.

P - Patience (How easily angered is he?)

99% of the time Catcher is cool as a cucumber. The 1% of the time he gets riled up is because someone insulted his sex appeal, journaling skills, or you. At that point you might as well step out of the way and let him do what he does best: destroy the offender with an exposé.

Q - Quizzes (How much does he remember about you?)

He's capable of remembering a lot about you, however, because he's had so many partners during his playboy days, he sometimes confuses an ex's info with yours 😬.

R - Remember (Favorite memory with you?)

Catcher's favorite memory with you is of the first time your bond began to form. You got to accompany Catcher to Japan while he worked on an article. It was there that you both were introduced to karaoke by the man you were interviewing. It would be offensive to turn him down so you nervously went through with it. Turns out, Catcher is actually a good singer! The two of you grew more comfortable as the night went on and even sang several duets! Catcher was impressed with your willingness to put yourself out there for the job. Belting his heart out with you by his side felt like magic.

S - Security (How protective is he?)

He's not super protective. He knows that you can take care of yourself. If you couldn't, then you wouldn't be in the cutthroat world of journalism. Of course, that doesn't mean he won't always have your back.

T - Try (How much effort does he put in?)

Catcher is a man who believes in going above and beyond. It's how he become the best journalist in New York after all. He applies this mentality to anything he sets his mind on. Or in this case, anyone. He pulls out all the stops when wooing you and even after you start going steady. Of course, he doesn't want to seem like he's trying since that would ruin his laid back persona. But in his heart, he's genuinely eager to please.

U - Ugly (What are his bad habits?)

Let's just say that putting others first is not second nature to him. It's not that he goes out of his way to be selfish, he's just never had to share before. He's used to going where he wants and doing what he wants whenever he wants. He hasn't had a relationship deeper than a fling so thinking about how his decisions affect you doesn't really cross his mind. This also leads to another bad habit which is assuming that what he wants is also what you want.

V - Vanity (How concerned is he with his looks?)

VERY! Never a hair out of place or a wrinkle in his wardrobe. He's sexy and he knows it and you best believe he flaunts it.

W - Whole (Would he feel incomplete without you?)

He would be heartbroken if your relationship didn't work out and he does miss you when you're apart. However, he would be able to bounce back eventually though you'd always have a place in his heart.

X - Xtra (Random headcanon)

He's not quick to cry but the song "Moon River" never fails to make him misty-eyed.

Y - Yuck (Things he doesn't like in general or in a partner)

Catcher is very open to new experiences. His motto is: "I'll try anything once, twice if I like it" (wink wink). Therefore, someone who prefers living in a set routine or refuses to step outside their comfort zone isn't going to last in a relationship with him.

Z - Zzz (What is a sleep habit of his?)

He's a wild sleeper. Limbs all over the place, tossing and turning, all that jazz. He's also a blanket hog.