Little, Is Home

Little, is home

You were done, with everything. You'd had enough. As you stomp through the front door, you're greeted by a sight that brings tears to your eyes. Spencer, in the 10 minutes he had before you got home, set op your playmat in front of the TV, there's your mobile mat, colouring sheets and crayons. Spencer's smiling at you from the couch.

"There's my princess, come on now. Come to Daddy"

You practically jump onto his lap, making him chuckle. "Now now, what you say, we get you into a diaper and a onesie huh?"

"Yeaaaa, please Daddy?" Your voice grows soft, quite, small. Spencer looks lovingly at your state before picking you op around his hip the way you would a toddler. Your Daddy chances your clothes and sets you down on your playmat. You can't help the grin growing on your face, you really needed this, and Daddy knew it.

You color a million different pictures, watch a million cartoons, but as the night comes to an end, Spencer puts you down in your new crib with a stuffie to snuggle with.

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1 year ago

Night night.

It's sooooo late, and you're waiting op for Spencer, you know you shouldn't, but you can't go to bed with cuddles from your daddy. That's just impossible, so impossible!

You're rubbing your eyes, starting to grow fussy from staying op way past your bedtime, you know Spencer isn't going to happy with that, but you're hoping for a little leniency tonight. You're in your coziest little clothes, pacifier still in your mouth.

You hear a door open and you get op, shuffling op to meet your Daddy halfway. Spencer's taking his shoes off when he looks over to the sound of shuffling. He smiles as you open your arms wide to be picked op.

"Hello there sweet one" Spencer hoists you op on his hips. You settle into it quickly, wrapping your arms around his neck. He gently pats your bottom, rubbing you back in his other hand. Now happy in your Daddy's arm, your grumpiness is replaced with pure tiredness. "Oh you've been op late huh?" Spencer chuckles, patting your bottom firmly. You babble incoherently as Spencer puts you down on your bed while he changes.

You babble sleepily, the light in your bedroom is orange and is making you even more tired as you lay on you back. Spencer leans down, kissing your forehead. "it's night night time now little one" That makes you whines. You wanted cuddles, not night night. Spencer hushes your protests by peppering kisses over your face. Of course it works, it always does.

As Spencer settles in, you tuck yourself tight against his chest. He chuckles, and takes you in his embrace, you're too sleepy to care. So you snuggle close. Finally having gotten your cuddles, you can sleep. And, you sleep like the baby you are, snuggled op close to Daddy, deep asleep.


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2 years ago

I'm okay

I run through the forest, my feet burning under me. My heart's pounding in my ears. My chest's tight, too tight, I can't breath. I stumble and fall over a fallen tree. I rush to my feet, stumbling on until through the dark forest I see the light of camp half-blood. The taste of blood is on my tongue, shit did I knock out a tooth or something. I swing on a tree and book it for the big house. Help, I need help. I yell for something, someone, I don't remember what exactly, but I yell out, it's loud, I'm being loud. People come rush out from all over. An Apollo camper, Will maybe, makes me sit on the front steps. He stuffs some paper under my nose. It was bleeding, that was the blood. "Jason, you're okay" He props my leg up, through all the adrenaline I haven't noticed that I had ripped my knee up pretty badly. I must look pretty shaken, because Will counts me through my breathing. There's chaos all around, campers running into the forest, the campers that had been with me, running out, injured and scared shitless. Some are tended to as soon as they run out, some are led into the Infirmary. Will wraps a bandage around my knee, securing it in place by wrapping it a bit down, and a bit up. Clipping down together with something I don't know. I take the paper away from my nose. "Nico, where's Nico?" I shallow down the lump in my throat, Nico, Nico was there, where is he. "I'm sure he's fine, just stay here" Will takes my other leg in his hand. Somehow I scuffed up my ankle. "No, He, He was with us" I heave. "Where is he?" "Shit" Will says, starring up at me wide eye. "He was with you?" "Yes, yes was I not-"

"There you are!" Nico crashes down next to me, he throws his shaking arms around me. "Oh thank fuck you're okay" He pulls back, leaning on shaky arms. He grabs my chin. "Did you fall? Are you okay? what happened? What's-" "Easy" I grab his hand. Will's called away, he runs off to help. "I'm okay" I breath. I'm shaking, it's hard to breath. "Can you breath? How are you? What wrong? What-" I shush him, gribbing his hand tight. "I'm okay" I whispers, breathless. I unlace our hands with shaking fingers, I press his hand to my heart. "See, I'm okay" His eyes are wide with fear. The light of the lamp by the door to the big house, is the only light. People are rushing by us, but we don't move. No, we can't move. The world is in chaos around us, but it's doesn't matter, nothing else matters, as long as Nico's okay, then I'm okay. The blood drips through the bandage, it's dripping down my leg, why did I wear shorts. "You're hurt" He cries out, completely out of breath. "I'll be okay" I whisper, heaving through my open mouth. Will runs back to us. He undoes the bandage and gives me something to hold over the cuts until it stops bleeding. He tries to take a look at Nico but he flat out refuses. "No, No I'm fine. Go" "Just let him have a look" I insist. Nico gives in at my persistence. He's a little scuffed up, but nothing's bleeding, he's okay, so Will runs along to help others. Nico's okay. He's safe, right here with me. My heart rate slowly down as the chaos slowly becomes, well, more organized chaos. It's still wild, but the Apollo campers have a hand on it. They know what they're doing. I hope. After a lot of reassurance I get Nico to let his hand drop from my chest. Instead he takes the hand I'm not using to stop the blood from getting everywhere. He squeezes my hand tightly. I squeeze back. He's not leaving my side again. How did that even happened, we were carefully. We did everything we were supposed to do. He leans into my side. Resting his tired head against my shoulder.

"You almost scared me to death back there, what were you thinking?" His voice is low in the moon light, almost like he doesn't want the people around us to hear him, which wouldn't surprise me. What I did was stupid, I could have gotten myself killed. "I wasn't" I admit, I wasn't thinking, I just needed keep the others safe, keep him safe. So I called after the monster, taunting it, then I ran, leading it away from the others. Away from Nico. I wasn't gonna lose another person, I wasn't gonna let my first, and maybe only boyfriend die before me. "You're an idiot" He says, shoving his shoulder against mine, making us swing for a second before I balance us out. "I know, I'm sorry" I mumble, my legs are heavy, my feet burning. "You could have died" "You could have died too" I shoot back. Nico huffs, and leans up. For a second I think he's going for my ear, to whisper some kind of theat. But he stops before that, planting a light kiss on my cheek. Blood rushes to my face, he's never, oh, fuck. "At least you're my idiot" He murmurs. I blush at his words, thanking Diana he can't see me all that well because of the moonlight. "Yeah" I mutter. Gods, that was a way to end this disastrous trip to the forest. Nico chuckles lightly, careful to not break the mood between us. "Your idiot" I repeat. I move the cloth off my knee, it's drenched in blood. Nico calls over another Apollo kid who cleans it for me and set on a bandage just as Will did. Expect that, now is the time where you suppose to put it on, when the bleeding has stopped, but I know Will was busy, so he jus needed it to hold for a while, while he helped others. I'm told to keep it clean, and to stop by the Infirmary until it's healed. I nod along, not caring one bit, Nico's okay, so I'll be okay too. Suddenly, the horn is blown, it is dinner time? We all gather up at the mess hall we're told to sit where we want, We sit at the closest table, the Zeus table, Nico sits on my left. Mr. D gives some sort announcement, but I can't follow, my heart still hasn't completely returned to normal.

We're given dinner, and there's a silence over the mess hall. Even while eating, Nico refuses to let go of my hand. I don't think I want him too. He finishes before me, instead of leaving, he leaning into my side, squeezing my hand. I squeeze back. Glancing over, I spot Nico's tired eyes, It's not late at all. But I get it, after such a big adrenaline rush, you can get really tired. He gives a small smile. I smile back. We'll be okay, we have to be. And that's why we're gonna be okay. Plus, we have each other. I have him, that's all I need. They call for the camp fire, But I hold Nico's gaze, the answer is already there. We sneak off to the green, to the Hades cabin, that's the closest from here. We sink to the floor just beyond the closed door. Lost in each other's arms, in the soft, gentle touches. It could have been over tonight, it could all have ended. I could have lost him, I could have lost my own life. But we have to move on, so we collect ourselves and get off the floor. Through tears and laughter, we stumble onto his bed. I take a good look at his tear stained face. The face I can't live without. The guy I can't live without. The worried has seeped of his eyes, replaced by relief. We're in the clear for now. I hope we can stay in the clear for a while. But that's pure luck. I caress his cheek, hold him close, I never wanna let go. But I do, shifting back against the wall. Nico follows, sitting himself in my lap, resting his head on my shoulder. "You really scared me" He mutters. "I know" I mumble back, wrapping my arms around his middle. "Promise you won't do that again" He pleads. "You know I can't do that" I whisper. Nico leans back to look in my eyes. He slings his arms around my neck.

"Promise me that you'll try, please"

"I promise"


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2 years ago

Headache

I yawn, sitting up in bed. A splitting headache is the first thing I'm met with it. Fuck. This is gonna a rough day. I get out of bed, the ultra white walls not helping my headache. I grab my Camp Jupiter shirt, then remember that I'm at Camp half-blood, and get a Camp half-blood shirt out instead. I get dressed and head out to breakfast. I eat half heartly. Not really hungry but I force it down. I'm half asleep at my table, I almost fall into my food several times. The sun's too bright and it's annoying my eyes even more. Only now do I realize, I forgot my glasses. After breakfast I take the short way back to my cabin and get them. But the short way is still way too fucking long. I take the short cut to the arts and crafts area, the sun getting in my eyes all the way. I take the only open chair and listen to the teacher. No one bothers me about being late. The teacher bring in up a Aphrodite boy, getting him to lazy about in a round chair with a white fluffy blanket. Great, paint. This is gonna be messy. I grab a pencil and try to sketch the scene. I set down the canvas for a second, holding my head. I take a deep breath, and pick up the pencil again. Continuing to sketch for a while. I shift so I'm not getting the sun in my eye as much. I move on to the paint. I'm in a haze for the rest of class, looking up, painting, stopping, getting some water, looking up again, painting again, stopping again, and getting more water. The class ends, and my painting is finished. It looks okay, it's good, considering the state I'm in. There's paint all over my hands, so I head to sink and scrub it off. "Are you okay?" It's an Athena camper, She looks worried. "I've got a bad headache" Only after saying that, do I realize that I'm taking to Annabeth. Fucking shit man, this is really bad. "What you got after this?" She asks. "Um, I've got, um" I rub my eyes. "Wall climbing" I say finally. "Maybe you should stop by the infirmary first" She says. "No, it's only other thing I have today" I mutter.

"Oh right, you're still on half days, cause of the whole temple design thing. Just make sure you stop by the infirmary after" "I will" She gently pats my shoulder and walks away. I head of to the climbing wall, which is also too fucking far away, I just wanna go back to bed and hide from the sun. Does Apollo hate me or something, with glint of it, my headache becomes worse. This can not be normal. I just need to get through this class, and go back to bed. I should get this check out. I mean it's not the first time, but it's definitely the worst one I've had. I drag myself to the climbing wall. I'm put with the Ares kids and the Dionysus kid i can't remember the name of. As we go about class, I'm more clumsy then usual, I lose my footing, I fall, and I can't seem to focus. Chiron pulls me off to the side, halfway through class. "Is something wrong?" He asks. "Sorry, I'm off my game today, I've got a real bad headache, just looking at the sun or light makes it worse" I mutter. "I think it'd be better if you just go to the infirmary before you get seriously injured" I can't even look at him, He's standing in the sun. "Yeah, okay" i murmur and leave for the infirmary. My body's a bit heavy, it's hard to walk, my head is ponding, and I'm sweating in the summer heat. It's feels like I've been shot through my forehead. I was suppose to draw up some more temples today, but in this state, I won't be able to do anything. I think I'll have to lay with my head buried into my pillow. The Zeus cabin doesn't have curtains, so the sun just streams in though the windows. I come up on the step of the big house, stopping at a pillar, holding onto for a second to balance myself. Then push on. I'm seen by Will, who's quite concerned. "You say, the sun makes it worse?" He asks. "Mhm, the sun, any sort of noise, focusing on anything that's written" I wave my hand around a bit as I explain.

"Okay" Will says, making his voice low and soft. "I don't think that's headache, I think you might have migraines" "What?" I ask. "Um, A migraine is, i guess a more intense headache that you can't really do a lot about. You should just find a quite, and dark room to lay in" "That's all I can do?" "Sorry" He whispers. "Where I am suppose to find that, my cabin is the fucking opposite" I grunt. "I'm really sorry" Will repeats. "Would you like me to get Nico?" Will asks. I nod and Wil leaves me alone on the cot. I fell back on it and close my eyes. I haven't seen Nico all morning, seeing him now is the only real thing I want. I want his arms around me, I crave his touch, his touch wouldn't make it go away, but having him around during times like these is the only thing that makes me feel better. I wanna be held and be only with him. I throw my arm over my eyes, incasing myself in darkness. The rustling of the infirmary around me. I shuffle on my side and curl in on myself. Pain blooming out from head. It's almost like my head is made of metal that's being overheated. I'm sweating more then ever, My clothes are sticking to my skin. There are gently fingers on my hand, grazing up my wrist. I peal my eyes open, seeing Nico crouched down in front of me. "Let's get you to my cabin, that's dark and quite" He whispers to me. I mumble out a sound for yes, sitting up and getting out of the cot. Nico links my arm with his, lending me outside. He halts us just outside the door of the big house. Pulling me to the side so we wouldn't be in the way of anyone wanting to leave. He wraps his arms around me, and I relax into his touch. Letting my head drop onto his shoulder. He runs his hand up and down my back. "I'm sorry you have to through this" He whispers twisting his head and presses a light kiss on the place where my shoulder meets my neck.

I snuggle into his skin. That underworldly, pomegranate smell. He's the only one who has that smell. He pulls back from me, linking his arm with mine. I keep my eyes on the ground as he walks us to the Hades cabin. He hums lowlily as he unlocks the door, he grabs my hand and guides me into the dark cabin. It's not completely dark but darker then mine. It's not the first time he's bought me back here when I'm having a day like this. It's actually the norm when I'm having a headache- no a migraine. He sits me down on his bed, and he goes around drawing the curtains. I take off my shoes, Nico always insists on it, He's told me it's just a thing from his childhood, he says it's makes living here easier for him. I get comfortable in his bed, laying down on the right side, which had become my side. The Hades cabin is the prefect place to be on a day like this. It's a good while away from the other cabins and a fucking long while away from mine. So it's pretty quite. I've started spending the night here more often, especially on days like this. My head hurts so bad. I vaguely see Nico bend down to take off his own shoes. I relax into the soft mattress. I close my eyes, hoping to get some sleep. I hear Nico shed his jacket and lay down with me. The bed creaking a bit under his weight. I peak my eyes open a tiny bit, turning on my side. He's laying on his side too. His eyes are gently, gazing at me with love. I tug on his shirt, a small hint we've made. He shuffles over, gentle arms wrap around me. I shift down a little, laying my head in the crook of his neck. I breath in his sent, relaxing into his hold. He slips his hand under my shirt, resting his surprisingly warm hand on my lower back. I snuggle my face into the skin of his neck. The pain doesn't go away, but having Nico around is a good distraction. The soft, gentle touch's of his hands, the light brushes of his fingers.

This is the best distraction I've found so far. And a good reason to spend more time with Nico. I shift a little. A hand runs through my out grown hair. Almost petting my hair as a small consolation. I've been in this pain for about 3 or so hours now. It should be over when I wake up again. My body goes completely limp in his arms. Even through the pain, I slowly fall asleep. I open my eyes a couple of times, but they're too heavy, and they fall closed again. It only feels like a couple of seconds, but when I fully wake up, it's getting dark outside. Nico's by the door, talking in a very hushed tone with who I think might be Annabeth. I yawn and sit up, there's a very small buzz in my head. The migraine's gone, replaced by a very very slight headache. They both fall quite and look back to me. They don't say anything, but the question is still there. "I'm okay" I murmur, rubbing the sleep out of my eyes. "Is the migraine gone?" Nico whispers. "Mhm" I mumble, pulling the covers off and almost rolling out of bed. "What time is it?" I murmur, clinging to Nico's arm. Annabeth chuckles. "6:30, dinner time" she says. I shiver a bit in the summer air. Nico slings his arm around me. "You cold?" "A bit" I say. Nico lends me his coat, which is a bit too big on him, which means it fits me perfectly. And we all head off to dinner. It's open seating, which is unusual, but I'm happy to be able to sit with Nico. Sitting at the Hades table, I'm reminded why I don't like to take naps. Because I'm tired, clumsy, and quite clingy. When Nico's like this, I think it's cute. But when I'm like this I find it weird. Nico on the other hand, finds it quite adorable. We go through the normal routine of dinner, offering food to the gods, and we sit down to eat. I eat half heartly, almost falling into my food at time, Nico catches me every time. Gently grabbing my face to steady me, eventually deciding it was better to keep an arm around my shoulders.

"You okay?" He asks. "Yeah, yeah, just tired" I mumble, setting my plate aside, and leaning into his side. Nico chuckles lightly, smiling a bit. "What?" "You slept for 6 hours Hon" He squeezes me gently. "Huh" I mumble. I does not feel like that. I smile as Nico drags me to the campfire. He's not a big fan of the sing along at the camp fire, but he knows I'm love it, So he pulls me along to find a spot to sit. We take a spot in the dark, so we can snuggle if we want. Which, of course I want. Nico's normally not a cuddler, but he doesn't stop me when I snuggle up to him. I lay my head on his shoulder. Leaning into his side. He leans over, plating a light kiss on my forehead. The pain's gone away all together. I still haven't fully woken up. Nico always says that I take a while to wake up, normally about an hour. I smile, snuggling into his neck. Looking back on tonight, I feel a slightly embarrassed about I was acting. But right now, in the moment of tonight. I'm happily sitting by Nico, cuddling into his side. He wraps an arm around my shoulder. He snuggles his head against mine, whispering. "You are being adorable" He kisses the top of my head and sits up again. I hum in agreement, shifting a bit. Nico's offered a marshmallow, he takes it, sticks it on a stick, and spins it by the fire. I'm later told that I was offered one too, but I don't recall it. I'm half asleep on the bench by beside him. At some point, some how, Nico get me to move onto his lap. It's not really a thing we do, but tonight it's okay, tonight it's just another sigh of affection that no one comments on. I would never normally do that. One, I'd be worried about crushing him, because he's smaller then me. Two, I'd be worried about what everyone around us would say. But in this state, I'm not even sure who's around us, I'm just tired and happy to be in my boyfriends lap. We should do this more.

I let myself lean back on his chest, lacing my finger with his hand, the hand that was laying on my thigh. He squeezes my hand. Nico leans his head up, resting his head on my shoulder. I vaguely see him pull the marshmallow off the stick with some crackers. It' gotten very dark, and more quite. Some people have left. I hear him eat it, almost slowly, carefully. I shift a back a little, Nico shifts a bit. He wraps an arm about my hips. Gently pulling me back, until I'm fully sat against his chest. He plants a kiss on my neck. A small, I love you. A small, you're mine. A small, I love having this with you. I make some sort of embarrassing noise. I'm almost asleep in his lap, I don't really remember the rest of the night. I smile. Nico rustles me a bit, he's asking me something. "Wha?" I yawn. I rub the sleep out of my eyes. "I think we'd better get you to bed" He chuckles. "What, no I'm fine" I mumble. Nico shift me a bit, leaning up to whisper in my ear. "Baby, it's bedtime" He places his teeth onto my ear. Ready to bite if I don't comply. I hear a small whine slip pass my lips. There a chuckle next to my ear, and he pulls back. He gently pats my thigh, and I know he wants me to move. I shuffle to my feet and he get's to his feet too. I cling to his arm as we walk back to the cabins. He's got an arm around me, holding me tightly against his side. Nico yawns and pulls me along to my cabin, which is the closest. He takes the key from around my neck and he unlocks my door. We're not suppose to have keys, but we do. He pulls me into the now dark cabin, flicking on the light. I close the door behind me. Pulling my heavy body to my bed. We both shed our clothes, stripping down to our underwear. The summer sun had baked the inside of the cabin, making it incredibly hot. We get in bed, laying on either side. Refusing to lay with a blanket because of the heat. "I love days like these" I murmur. "What? you were in pain for most of the day" He says. He turns on his side, and I turn too. "Not that, I mean, spending almost the whole day together, like this"

"I wanna have this more"

"I'd like that too"


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4 years ago

Once apon a time

(I know it's not Christmas but I was looking through an old book of mine and found this, so I wrote it here)

Sanders sides a Fairy Tail about a new Christmas tradition

Once apon a time there livet a young lad out in the woods, all alone. The town hated him. every year on Christmas eve the towns people would come and throw sticks and stones at his little cabin. Because of this he would ever again leave the Forest nor his his house for that matter, not even Christmas was anything to look forward to. 'but this year will be better'

But on the stroke of Midnight, Virgil was yet not asleep no he was running around the town placing posters on every door he could find.

He was going to show them that he still had it in him

When the night of Christmas eve came. No one came.... So there the young lad stood 'they didn't even came to throw stones at me' he thought as he sat down on the steps of he's house.

He sat there with his head in his hands, but then he felt a small hand tapping his shoulder. He looked up, and there stod the whole town. "sorry if we were a little late, we got lost" said the town elder

A small boy came up to him, and gave him a teddy bear "I'm sorry for all We have done. My names Patton but you can call me Pat"

The boy looked no older then 8 years old

"the others didn't want to come, but Logan made them. Logan's the towns elder..."

Logan spoke up "and we could use a young man like you, don't worry we know what you are dear"

Virgil stod up in shock "you know I'm a wicth?"Virgil asked ready to run for his life

"we do and we don't mind, not at all" Logan said

Virgil smlies Softly "well come inside, the food should be ready soon"


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1 year ago

Little Spencer

You know something is wrong when Spencer calls you from a damn payphone. Your first thought is obvious, did he shoot op? And if so, where in all of hell is he. "Can you come get me?" his voice is shaky, with a small hint of desperation "Are you high Spence?" you blurt out, sticking a hand on your hip for stability. "What? no, no I'm not high" you expected him to sound offended, not sad and small. He doesn't ask the question again. "Where are you?" you ask, grabbing your keys off the counter. "Main, down on Ashely, by Reliy's cafe" He gulp's. "I'll come get you, but you better tell me what's going on right know" You demand, slipping on your shoes.

"I, I need you" "What?" You struggle to put your coat on with one arm. He needs you, what does that mean "I, need. I'm feel sm-tired. I just need to be home right now" He stammers. Small, he almost said small. Oh god it's really happening. He's regressing. Just like the therapist suggested he should try to. "Small? Are you feeling small honey?" you ask, trying to hide a smile. "Yes, a little. Will you please come get me?" It's the closest he can get to begging in public without getting some damn sassy side eye. You close the door and slide the key in. "I will, one little thing first. Why are you calling from a payphone and not your cellphone?" You ask, enjoying your own word play. You hurry down the stairs. There's a small noise over the line. A whimper. "It's dead" he admits. "Okay, is the team with you?" You ask, unlocking the car and switching the call to your ear piece and tossing your phone in the glove compartment. "Yes" "I need you to stay with them, i don't want you wandering off and getting hurt. Can you find Morgan?"

"Mogan's not here, he's with Rossi" He says. "Who is there? Who can keep an eye on you until i get there?" You ask, turning out from your housing block. It's a short drive, luckly. Only 6 minutes to get to Ashely down on main. You hope Specer is okay "I don't need a babysitter" He grumbles, most likely crossig his arms. "If you need me to get you, then you might need a babysitter. Now tell me who's there" You demand, turning down the street. "Garcia, and JJ" He says, mostly certainly pouting slightly at this point. "Then go ask Garcia for a hug. Tell her you don't feel well and that I've asked her to keep an eye on you until i get there. Tell her I'm worried sick about you and I'm breaking every traffic law to come get you" You instructs, turning down the last street, only 3 minutes now. There's a giggly excitement in your stomach. Spencer's doing what the therapist told him too, he's finally letting the therapy have effect. "Okay, she's in the store I'm gonna go" Spencer mumbles. "Good, I'll be there in 3 , stay with Pen" You say right before the line cuts out. You heave a sigh of happiness, stepping firmly on the gas.

You park right by the payphone, finding Spencer and Penelope sitting on a bench outside. Spencer's dressed the same way he was yesterday, purple button op with a dark grey vest over it and dark blue jeans. Penelope is of course, fussing over him, asking why he didn't say something sooner. You open your arms for him and he melts into your hold. You give Penelope a thank you, nod before taking Spencer to the car. While you knew he wasn't going to be publicly showing off the fact that he's feeling small, you thougt, or hoped he at least looked a little off. No pun intented. Spencer settles into the passager seat, something you've gotten use to. You squeeze his hand, trying to find some clue to his headspace. He doesn't say a word, only gently squeezing back. You smile, either he's too embarrsed to talk, or he can't. You lean over and buckle him in. "I'm gonna take you home now, okay?" You ask, letting your hand run over his knee for a breif second. "Okay..." he mumbles, voice light and bittle as he lays his folded hands in his lap. "Hey.." you coo, laying a hand over his. "It's okay, tell me what's going on" You ask, letting him pull one hand out from under yours. He curls his hand op his chest. "Are you cold Baby?" You ask. He shakes his head lightly, starting to pout. "What's wrong then?" you coax, powering op the car. Spencer whimpers and you chuckle. "I don't speak whimper code Baby boy" you tease. He whimpers again, wiggling his feet. You glance over, what's he really saying? "What? Baby the only thing i think you might want right now, is to suck your thumb, but i know you don't want that because you find it unsanity" You say, trying not to chuckle. He nods, and you let yourself chuckle as he blushes. "There's baby wipes in the glovebox, clean your fingers, carefully under your nails, then go ahead" You instruct, pulling your hand to yourself. You focus on the road as you hear Spencer open the glovebox and grabbing the packet of wipes. He picks out one and begins to clean his hands. Then he takes another one and cleans under his fingers nails. "Aw, look at you. So smart" You praise, rounding the corner. Spencer puts the wipes back, bitting his lower lip. You catch his look of hesitation. You take a moment to decide if you should press or let him comfort himself about it. "It's okay, no one's gonna see you. It's just you and me" You say, laying a hand on his knee. You hear him whine quietly as he slips his thumb into his mouth. You think it might be a good idea to get a pacifier. It's more satiny, easier to keep clean. And you'd have control of it, you can't take his thumb away, but a pacifier you could. You can force a pacifier into his mouth, his thumb? not so much.

Woah woah woah! you are way too far into undiscussed territory. Dial it back for a second. Pacifiers, undiscussed, no consent given. You're gonna have to ask about that. Forced headspace, undiscussed, no consent given yet. You're gonna have to ask about that too. Any forcing a pacifier or anything into his mouth, not discussed! You finally pull op in front of your appartment block. You glance over to find Spencer half asleep with his thumb firmly in his mouth. You hate to do it, but you reach over and gently take his thumb out from his mouth. He whines a bit but let's you pull it out. "You can continue when we're inside, okay? Because right now, we gotta get you home" You wipe his wet thumb on you shirt and unbuckle his seatbelt. He nods and you get out from the car. He follows you closely op to the appartment, mostly because he can't stray far from you cause you've got an arm around his waist. Which is not something you usualy do, but, you wanted to. You get into the appartment and the second the door is closed, Spencer's sucking his thumb again. You focus, very hard to not chuckle. Because that's wildly insensitive. But maybe that pacifier is a good idea. You brush a hand over his hair. "You doing okay there baby?" You ask sweetly, as you guide him to the couch. He nods and you pet his back gently. He lays down on the couch without much proment, his eyes only half open. It's strange sight, Dr. Spencer Reid laying on your shared couch while sucking his thumb.

For one, you never dreamed you would share a home. Never dreamed you'd get Spencer into therapy. Never dreamed of this. You lay a blanket over him, leaning down to kiss his forehead. "Hey, you okay there baby boy?" You knell down in front of him. He's not really reacting to you, so you stoke hos cheek. He leans into your touch. Maybe you should get him into some more comfortble clothes. He shakes his head a bit. "Should i get you into some comfy clothes? Would that help?" You ask, continuing to stoke his cheek. He nods slightly, slipping his thumb out from his mouth. You want to tell him to keep it in his mouth, but you don't wanna push. He wipes his thumb dry on his shirt. "Yeah? okay. What do you say to.......sweats and a hoodie?" You ask, moving your hand to stoke his hair instead. His eyes are still only half open as he shakes his head. "No, okay. What about sweats and a sweatshirt?" You coo, hoping you've struck right with the clothes. He nods, and looks down to his thumb. You smile. "I'll get that for you baby, you just relax and suck your thumb if you want" You encourage. He slips it back in his mouth and wiggles a bit to settle comfortable on the couch. You smile even wider and hurry off to find the promised clothes. Oh, he's relaxing, and he's actually letting you take care of him. This is good. Really good. You find dark grey sweatpants, a black tanktop, and a light grey sweatshirt.

You find Spencer asleep, so you rouse him a bit before helping him sit op. He's still sucking his thumb as you pull the vest off him. It makes it a bit more difficult, but you don't mind. The soft cotton of the vest is a bit worn out and thin in some places. He's wearing it to death. You pull his shirt op from his pants and get to work unbuttoning it. You hear the pop of Spencer pulling his thumb from his mouth. "Mama?" He mutters. "Yeah baby?" You manage to get out in a reasonably coherent voice, or so you hope. Mama. Oh god, you were not expecting that. In any way. This morning he didn't even wanna talk about anything relating to therapy. Now he's calling you Mama. You slide the shirt off his shoulders and down off his arms. "I'm thirsty" he confesses. "Okay" You almost choke. Thirsty. He's thirsty. "I'll get you drink in a minute, what do you want sweetie?" You ask, picking op the tank top and he raises his arms and helps you along with getting it on. You slip the sweatshirt over his head. He shrugs, he's never been good at remreber what's in the fridge. You almost say coffee, but that doesn't feel right. "Apple juice?" You suggest, unbuttoning his pants. He blushes and pulls your hands away. This throws you for a loop. He's okay with you taking your shirt off, but not his pants. You hold out the pants, raising an eyebrow. "Do you wanna you try do it yourself Baby?" You ask, wondering just why it's okay to see him without a shirt, but not okay to see him his boxers. It's not like it'd be the first time.

He takes them from you, nodding. "Okay, you can absolutely do it yourself. Did you want some apple juice?" You ask again, chancing the topic to drinks. He nods and you head to the kitchen. Both to get him that damn juice, and to let yourself have a mini break down. You draw in a deep breath, bracing yourself on the kitchen counter. Juice. Apple juice. You find an old plastic cup you used when you'd broken your wrist and weren't trusted with actual glass glasses. You listen for any rustling. Has he finished changing yet? You draw in another deep breath. Okay, give Spence some juice, then what? What do you do then? it's midday, it's not even close to dinner time. Is it just cuddle time with some Tv? Would that take him out of the headspace? Or would it help? Okay, breathe. Breathe. Give your baby the juice, and let him deicde what he wants to do. You go back to the living room. Surprised that Spencer's not there. "Spence? Baby boo?" You call, setting the juice down on the coffee table. You hear a giggle from under the couch. Oh my. "Oh no!" You cry. "Where's my baby?" You bend down and pick op his clothes and start to fold them. "Oh no, I've lost my little Spencer where could he be?" You lay his folded vest down on the couch. Spencer's clearly hiddning under there, but maybe it's fun. It's gotta be fun. You lay a folded shirt aside, then his folded op jeans. You huff, hands on your hips. "Oh my, where's Mama's baby?" You falsely cry out. Then, Spencer sticks his head out from under the couch, smiling. "Here Mama!" "Oh my, there you are, you scared me" You lean down and pinch his cheek gently. You want to pick him op. But you're not sure you can, or that you'd be allowed to. He looks os cute, so sweet. You reach down and decide to try. If you fail, it'll be a fun mistake.

Spence giggles and laches onto your neck. You get an arm op under his legs, and he wiggles his feet. You smile to yourself, you can total carry him. Even if it's the last thing you do. You lift him op and dump him on the couch. He laughs as he bounces on the couch and your heart melts. You hand him the juice and he grabs it. You settle next to Spencer, watching closely as he finishes the drink in seconds. "Thank you" He sets the empty glass aside. "Your welcome baby" You say. He doesn't say anything for a few minutes, and you just wait. Hoping he'd eventually talk. When you realize he won't, you really wish there was someone there to help you with this. "Do you wanna watch some Tv?" You ask, in a hopefully tone. Spencer begins to pout and shakes his head. "What do you wanna do Baby?" You ask, trying desperately to make him feel happy again. You just want him to feel safe. Spencer shrugs, and quite frankly, you panic. You want to be a good caregiver for him, a good Mama but you've got no clue what you're doing right now. "D-Do you wanna play?" You ask, shifting closer and laying an arm around his shoulders. He pouts properly, violently shaking his head. "Okay, I'm kinda lost here Baby boy, what do you want?" You ask again, gently tugging on him. He turns to you, pouting and almost in tears. Oh no, no no no. No tears. He climbs ono your lap and wraps his arms around your neck. "Hi, hi Baby" You try to not franticly rub his back and give yourself away but you kinda fail. "You're okay Baby" You coax, letting him wrap his legs around you. Spencer rests his head on in the crook of your neck. Is he tired? is that it? "Are you sleepy?" You ask, shifting him slightly.

He nods, and you sigh in relief, petting his back soothingly. "Okay" you say, trying to keep yourself from asking a million questions. Does he want to sleep in your lap? Does he want to lay in bed? Does he need you to cuddle him to sleep? Does he need to lay down on the couch? You're about half way through every posble question when you hear Spencer snorring on your shoulder. Oh, oh. Sleep. He's sleeping. You grab his phone, okay power nap. How long is a normal power nap. What did Spencer say? 10 to 20 minutes, right? Okay, um, 20 minutes. You set a timer. What can do in 20 minutes? Better yet, what can you do with a sleeping Spencer in your lap? You can't do much with a sleeping baby in your lap. Wil the alram wake you too? Yeah, yeah it wil. You close your eyes, you deseve a nap too. You close your eyes.

You wake to a slight tugging, there's no alram blarring. Did you sleep through it? "Mama?" It's Spencer. You blink a few times, trying to open your eyes. "Yeah?" You anwser, shifting and feeling the heavy weigt on you. He leans into your neck, snuggling close the way a cat would. You wrap your arms around him. "Wake op Mama" "I'm awake" You say, pulling his face from your neck and kissing him. "I'm awake Baby" You repeat, squzzing him. He squeals. "Did you have a good nap?" You ask, setting your feet firmly on the floor. He nods, smiling wildly. "Good, good. You hungry?" You get to your feet with Spencer in your arms. "Mama!" He squeals, wrappinng his legs irmly around you. "Mhmm, you hugry Baby?" you ask again, ignoing his squealing. "Ah, mhmm" he half bites into his lower lip. "Yeah, that makes sense it's almost dinner time. And i know exactly what do to make" You say, and you mean it. "I don't get a say?" Spencer half whines, wiggling n your hold. "No, a baby shouldn't have to worry about food. Mama's got it" You coo, setting him down on the kitchen island. Something about his eyes seem different. Maybe it's just the warm kitchen light but you swear his eyes seem more dark. Like you're said something you weren't suppose to. Or that you've said something you should have said hours ago. Which remains unknown as you grab the bag that's been waiting in the fridge since your last therapy appointment. Well, bags. There are 4 in the fridge. Chicken nuggets, fries, and a small mix of veggies. The whole thing can fit in your biggest pan. Oh shoot, what are you gonna eat? Mhmmm.

Oh, make Spencer food, get him to eat while you make yourself something. Yeah, that makes. You pour some oil on the pan, then carefully place the food in different spaces on the pan. Knowing that Spencer's not a fan off food all mixed op. "Mommy?" Comes a small, brittle, voice. You turn in under a second. He's still sitting on the island, pouting slightly. "Yeah?" You answer, nodding. Okay, don't freak out. First Mama, now Mommy. Does that mean something? Don't regressors typically stick to one honorific? Is he just trying it out? Oh god calm down, don't let him see you freak out. He reaches out for you with both arms. You giggle a bit. "Okay" You say, leaving the pan for a moment to hoist him op on your hip. it's not easy to hold him with one arm, but you manage. You need to train your arms, you want to be able to hold him like this without issue. He snuggles into your neck. "Better?" You ask. "Mhmm"

So you have dinner, but you spend every second worrying he's gonna hurt himself with the fork. You decide you need child utensils, and a child plate. Oh god, you need a list. Garcia will help, right? she loves to shop. You will need to explain, and that's if Spencer's okay with you talking to her about it. "Mommy?" he asks from you chest. You've settled on the couch with him atop you. "Yeah?" You answer again, brushing a hand over his hair. "Can i....mhmm" he looks down to his hands. Seeming embarrassed again. You giggle lightly and reach for the pack of wet wipes you brought in from the car earlier. "Give me your hand" He does, like a good boy. This time, you clean his hand for him. Turning the wipe over, you carefully clean under the nail. You bend his thumb and stick it in his mouth. "There you go. I need to get you a pacifier, don't i?" You ask, hoping to coax an answer from him. He immediately starts to suck his thumb, blushing a bit. He doesn't answer, and so you bring a hand down and tap his back lightly. "Baby, how do you feel about a pacifier? I'm serious" He burries his face down in your chest. "Baby, I'm serious. Answer me please" You say. Spencer lays his head sideways, thumb tucked firmly in his mouth. You're first instinct is to threaten to take away the thumb sucking. But, you catch yourself, this is for him, not you. "Is it hard to talk?" You ask, rubbing his back. He nods, glancing op at you for a brief moment. "Okay, Pacifier. No?" You ask, he doesn't react. "Pacifier, Yes?" You ask, letting out a breath as he nods. You run a hand over his hair. "Okay, can you hand Mommy that paper pad and that pen?"

You take it from him and lay it on Spencer's shoulder to be able to write. "I'm gonna write some things down, and i need you to cross them out if you're not okay with it. Can you do that Sweetie?" You coax gently. You see him nod from the corner of your eye and you can't help but smile. After a bit more scribbling you hand the pen and paper to Spencer. You coo over him as he reads it. But when he hunches over the list you back off a bit, petting his back instead. it takes him a few minutes, which is how you know he's really thinking about it. He hands it back to you.

Pacifiers

Teethers

Kid plates and utensils

Bottles

onesies

Toys

Colouring books

Talking with Garcia about your regesstion

Talking to Morgan about your regression

Talking with Emliy about your regression

You smile and lay the papper aside. "Baby, you know if Garcia knows, they others might end op knowing at some point? Are you okay with that?" You ask. Spencer nods. "Okay" You say, brushing a hand over his hair again. Spence shifts to lay on top of you, and snuggles close to your chest. You feel like a puddle under him. This is the best day you've had in a while. It doesn't take long for Spence to fall asleep again. This must be tiring for him. You grab your phone off the coffee table. As you flip open your cover your phones lights op with a million different texts from the team. You're happy know the team cares so much. You stoke his hair and neck as he snores. You go on the round of responses, when you get to Garcia. You decide you need a phone call with your girl. She picks op on the first ring.

"Wonder woman at your servise" Penelope says over the line. "Hey Pen, I just wanted to let you know Reid's alright" You say, continuing to pet Spencer's hair. Spencer does this cute little meow kinda noise. "Aww, is that the mini genius?" She gasps. "Yeah. Um, listen. On the topic of mini genius" You drawl. "Oh god, tell me he's not leaving. I'm begging you" She pleads. "No, no" You say, continue to pet his hair. "He's not leaving, but there's something i want you to know. But you can not tell the others yet" You say quietly but firmly. "Oh my goodness, of course please spill Girl" She happily chimes. "It's not really that kinda tea but, have you ever heard of age regression?"

"Umm, yeah I've more then heard of it"

"Well, Spencer is a little. And i need some help with shopping for little things, it's online but I'd like your help, if you comfortable" You blurt out, hoping that if you got it out fast, then the rejection would be easier to handle. "Oh Mama you are on. Any ideas?" "I'll send you a list of things I'm looking for" You smile. And that's how you two weeks later end op with a 'care packet' from Garcia. A box of two pacifiers, a teether, a blue set of child plates and utensils, a light purple kid's sport water bottle with a bite valve, and the thing Spencer grabbed from the box the second he saw it. A white polar bear stuffie. You sent Penelope a handwritten thank you note.


Tags
1 year ago

hii! i really loved your magic bag story!! i was wondering if you could write more caregiver!Spencer with little! reader? if not no worries!! 💗

I most certainly can my friend. I've actually been looking to write some more of that. And you sparked a little idea in me.

"Baby I'm home!"

You had been home all all day, in short. You're regressed, you're needy, and you are getting close to a meltdown. You tug on the sweater you borrowed from Spencer, wishing he was home already. You throw yourself down on your play mat, the nice, comfy play mat Spencer had put op for you in the living room.

Your ear perk op as the sound of a door being unlocked filles the space. You look at the hoping, pleading for it to be Spencer and not Auntie Penny sendt to look after you because he's not going to be home for a while.

"Baby I'm home!" Spencer calls, you smile and jump op, rushing at him. "Ouf..." He takes you takes you into his arms, hoisting you op around his hip. "Do i have a clingly little princess tonight?" He asks, kissing your forehead. You nod, wrapping your arms around his neck, and legs around his waist. "Oh i do?" Spencer asks, bringing you to the living room, setting you down on the couch. You nod wildly, unhappy to be set down as you grab for Spencer. "I know, i know princess" He sqeuzzes your hands before going to the kitchen.

You whine, stomping your feet on the floor. "Daddy!" You yell for him, he's home and he's just leaving you alone? That's not fair! You deserve his attention, don't you? Spencer gives you a small smile. "I'll be there in a second Baby, promise, just a second" He reasures you as he grabs something from his jacket. You look at him, now curious of just what your Daddy is getting you.

"Close your eyes, Daddy has a surprise for you"

And so you do, waiting (And bouncing) as Spencer makes his way back to the couch where you are. Something falls into your hands and Spencer caress your cheek. "Open your eyes baby"

As smile and jump to hug your Daddy. "Thank you Daddy! Thank you!" You giggle, letting go to open the op the new pacifier. Spencer chuckles, watching you with a smile. "You're welcome baby, I know I've been busy the last few days, i hope you like it" Spencer says, siting down on the couch, waiting for you to join him. You do, fumbling with the box.

You smile down at the pretty purple pacifier. You smile and kiss Spencer's cheek. "Thank you Daddy, i love it" You say, pulling it from the packaging. You look to Spencer, hoping for his approval. Spencer chuckles, pulling you into his lap. "Go on, try it for Daddy"

You pop it into your mouth, smiling brightly as start to suck on it. Spencer smiles, stoking your hair. "Such a good little girl" Spencer praises you, gently tucking some hair behind your ear. You blush, still not use to Spencer praising you.

"Ready for some cartoons Baby?"

You nod, happily sucking away at your paci. Spencer sets your play mat in front of the TV and sets you down on it with some colouring pages and crayons. Spencer sets behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and resting his head on your shoulder as you colour him a picture.

That picture later ends op on the fridge.


Tags
1 year ago

Relax

It's a hot night, you've been sweating all day long. You decide it best to shower, Spencer isn't going to be home for a while and there for you can hog the bathroom for as long as you want.

You step into the tub / shower comb in your shared apartment. You quick rise the sweat off your body before settling for a nice long bath. You step out, still wet. As the tub fills op behind you, grab the basket of 'everything bath' that Spencer had gotten for you for your birthday. The basket is still pilled high with special hair care for your hair type, body washes, bath salts, bath bombs, and body scrubs.

You almost laughed at him when you saw it. But he coaxed you into it, at first just the physical care products then slowly to the more pretty and relaxing stuff.

You set the basket of stuff by the tub, just where you can reach. You slip into the warm water, your phone on the counter is playing some of your favorite music. You're on your second round of conditioner when the bathroom door opens, you haven't bothered to lock it as you were alone.

"There you are" Spencer sighs in relief as you rise the conditioner from your hair. "Hey, thought you weren't gonna be home until late?" You ask, brushing a hand through your hair. Spencer dips a hand into the blue and purple water besides you. "It's 2:28 am" Spencer presses a kiss to your damp forehead.

"It is?" You ask, watching as Spencer strips off. "Yes, do you mean if i join you?"

"I'd love that"

Spencer slips in behind you. The water in the tub raising further op. "Mhmm" Spencer snuggles into your neck, pressing a few sweet kisses to your skin. "Bad case?" You ask he continues to kiss you. That seems to halt him.

"Two kids, siblings, kidnapped by the same man a hour apart. They were found barely alive in the unsub's basement....I'd rather not discuss it further"

You turn your head, planting a soft kiss on his lips. "Of course" His eyes soften, and his shoulders relax. "Thank you" You share a few kisses before helping Spencer wash the day's stress away.

It's 2:58 by the time you and Spencer settle in bed together. It's dark, so you feel your way to Spencer's embrace. Spencer holds you close, gently tracing circles on your back.

You snuggle your head into the crook of his neck, your whole body feels soft and relaxed. Spencer shifts and gently pushes a leg between your thigh, you smile at this. A bath then cuddles, not a bad night.


Tags
9 months ago

Hello my friends,

🇵🇸🇵🇸🇵🇸❤🤍💚🖤

I am Mohammed Ayyad from Gaza Al-Shuja'iyya

,

I have sought refuge with you because of the devastating war that caused me to lose my home and my mother and we were displaced from one place to another and lost my children's future and there is a severe shortage of basic materials,

I have sought refuge with you so that I can provide a decent and safe life for me and my family consisting of my wife and my children Yasser, Omar, Maryam, Jana and Sarah, each of them has dreams but unfortunately they have lost hope and despair is controlling them,

I hope that you will stand by us either by donating if possible or sharing widely,

Thank you very much

🇵🇸🇵🇸🇵🇸❤🤍💚🖤

noting that my son Omar has a Tumblr account under the name @m430235341 and it was checked and I had an account under the name @mohammadayyad and it was also checked but I was surprised today that it was banned so today I created a new account under the name @mohammadyaser1980, please check it and thank you 5, @mohammadayyad’s fundraiser. As of posting they’ve been able to raise €12,143 of their €35,000 goal.This fundraiser has been vetted by @/inthefaceofada

https://gofund.me/e7c7528a

I'm sorry to say I'm not in a position to donate. Spread this around to people who can


Tags
1 year ago

Hotel room

Luke Alvez x autistic spencer reid Luke and Spencer share a hotel room and Spencer kinda has a meltdown Warning: I'm not autistic myself but have autistic friends and based Spencer's actions on their behaviour

Luke and Spencer are forced to share a room in a higher end hotel. Well, forced is the wrong word. Luke was away when the rooms were booked and therefore only 7 rooms were booked and Spencer offered to share. Or, Luke coaxed Spencer into sharing a room, seeing as they've been together for a little over 2 months. As Luke follows in behind him, he sees all of Spencer's belongings around the room, papers and books everywhere. "Excuse me please" Spencer slips into the bathroom. "Mhm" Luke clears his throat. He knows this is gonna be tough, it's not like they've been fighting or anything but Spencer has a need for his own space. Luke sets his own bag down by the bed. Would it be rude to tidy his book and such? Or would it be a nice thing to do?

Luke quietly gathers his books and papers on the small desk. It's already too late when he remembers Spencer doesn't like having his things moved. Shit! Oh damn it he's the worst boyfriend ever. Spencer's now standing beside him, looking tense. "I'm so sorry Spence. I completely forgot" Luke's first instinct is to reach out and offer comfort, but stops himself, not wanting to make Spencer more tense. He's still in his work clothes, not unusual, a button op, a sweater vest and slacks. Spencer's clicking his nails again. A stim he picked op a few wees ago. When Luke first said he was 'clicking his nails' Spencer looked so confused. But he is! Spencer's taking his thumb and clicking it on his other nails. Spencer's doing it with both hands op by his chest. "Um, it's fine, it's fine" He repeats in a mumble and blinks a few more times then normal. Luke gulps, okay, redirect. Redirect the nervous energy away from a meltdown. Luke shakes his head lightly. "It's not"

"Yeah no, it's not" Spencer speaks more loudly, not yelling but loud enough to hear him clearly. "I'm very sorry" Luke repeats, stepping away from the desk, facing Spencer but not looking directly at him. "Can i make it better?" Luke asks, folding his hands in front of himself. Spencer seems nervous, he runs both hands over his face before continuing to click his nails. "Mhmm" Spencer hums in frustration, leg now bouncing. Okay, Luke thinks, a meltdown is coming. "Uh, umm.. Do you have anything cold?" Spencer ask, waving his hands in front of his chest. Luke thinks. Okay cold, waving hands. Spencer wants something cold to hold. Cold, something cold to hold. He'd brought a soda! Down at the store before coming back to the hotel, it's still cold. "I do, I'm gonna get it okay?" Luke says, informing Spencer of his movements. Spencer nods a few times. Luke grabs the unopen and cold can of soda from his bag. He sets it on the desk instead of handing it to him. "This should be cold"

Spencer snatches it from the desk and Luke looks at the floor, letting Spencer know he's not going to force any eye contact or touch. "Can i do anything else?" He asks gently, watching Spencer's feet move across the room to the bed. "Um, can you, uh, I'm sorry Luke" Spencer's voice breaks and he begins to cry quietly. Luke walks to him, siting beside him but not touching him. "There nothing to be sorry for" Luke says, forcing his eyes on his feet. As much as he wants to look at Spencer, he doesn't want to make him more tense. "I, mhmm. I, Hold me? tightly?" Spencer asks, breath hitching. Luke wraps his arms around Spencer's waist, leaving his arms free to stim. "Tighter?" Spencer asks, shallowing hard. Luke does. "Thank you..." Spencer breaths, pressing the soda can to his neck, then face, then rolling it on his arms, down his legs before pressing it to his forehead for a bit.

Luke and Spencer sit there for a while, Luke waiting for Spencer to ask to be let go and Spencer waiting to feel better. "Luke?" Spencer asks, setting the can aside. "Yes?" Luke answers, careful not to alter his hold in any way. "I'm sorry, i just..." Spencer shakes his head. "I'm listening" Luke reasures.

"I know you've stayed at my place before and sharing a space isn't new, it's still new because at my place, it's mine, and i have the final say in where things ago, and here, it's a shared space and I'd already gotten settled and then you move my things and, it's not a big deal but I've had a really overstimulating day and it was just the last thing to tip the tower over" Spencer explains in a rushed voice.

"Okay, i hear you Spence, i hear you. Why don't you leave your things were they were before i came, and I'll find a place for my things if i need it. Sounds good?" Luke asks, still holding him tightly. Spencer nods. "Yeah, I'd like that" He says, nodding again. Luke smiles, okay, that wasn't hard to handle, there was no pacing or hitting anything, just stimming, a cold pressure, and touch. "Hey, deep breath in" Luke coaxes gently. Spencer draws in a deep breath. "Good, hold for 3 seconds" He continues, feeling Spencer's chest rise. "1, 2, 3, and let go" Luke guides gently, watching as Spencer breaths out and he's chest falls. "Good, again?" He asks. Spencer nods. "In" Spencer draws in another breath. "1, 2, 3, and out" Spencer shakes slightly as he breaths out.

"Thank you" Spencer mutters, leaning back into Luke's hold. "Wait, off, get off" Spencer yelps. Luke lets go and sits back. "My clothes, my clothes are, uncomfortable, icky" Spencer shakes his hands slightly before rushing to get his vest off, but his hands are shaking too much to get it off. "Do you want help Honey?" Luke offers. Spencer throws his hands out to his side, panting. "Yes please" He says. "Okay, I'm gonn-" "Please just get it off!" And that's how Spencer ends op in his boxers next to a fully dressed Luke. "Hey, feel my shirt, is it okay? Can it touch you?" Luke asks, offering his arm to Spencer. He brushes his fingers over the fabric before flattening his hand on it. "It's, oh it's nice" Spencer's feeling op his arm and Luke lets him.

Before Luke is fully aware of it. He's on his back on the bed with Spencer laying atop him, feeling his shirt. Luke's got his arms wrapped around him firmly but not tightly as Spencer traces his hands over the soft fabric. "it's cotton right?" Spencer asks, briefly snuggling into Luke's shoulder. Luke thinks for a second. "Yes, it's 90 or 100 procent cotton" Spencer mumbles off a few facts about cotton and some safe fabrics for him. Luke knows them before he even starts, cotton, satin, and slik. Almost every shirt Luke owns is one of those three so that Spencer can snuggle into him. Spencer looks op at him, and Luke almost melts. He's smiling, eyelashes still wet, lips pressed together in a cute smile. "Mhmm?" Luke questions, gently petting his hair. "I love you" Spencer says quietly, Luke smiles. "I love you too Spence" Luke reasures, gently toying with Spencer's hair.

Spencer rests his head on Luke's chest, and Luke grazes a hand down his back. "You okay?" Luke asks, tracing small circles on Spencer's skin. Spencer nods and yawns, snuggling op to his boyfriend. "Tired huh?" Luke asks, still tracing circles on his skin. Spencer nods. Luke debates telling Spencer to move so that he can change over just letting him fall asleep on him and for Luke to sleep in his work clothes. Luke decides he's slept in worse, and let's Spencer settle down for sleep. Luke reaches over and turns off the reading light. Luckily that was the only lightly on in the room.

Spencer snuggles close to Luke's neck, sending a shiver down his spine. "Spence?" Luke murmurs gently, brushing a hand down his hair. Spencer hums lightly. "Is this okay?" Luke asks, continuing to trace small circles on his back. Spencer nods and hums in agreement.

Luke doesn't stay awake for long, neither does Spencer.


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