A Mozzarella Stick!

bruh…

Beyonce literally took in oxygen and exhaled carbon dioxide. She literally turned. A. Gas. Into. A. Different. Gas. I don’t think yall understand that Literally no one has ever done that before.

I want to go to this exact point and run around it saying “I’m in Sweden!” I’m in Finland!” “I’m in Norway!” until I get tired

i aspire to great things in life

Making conversation can be tougher than it seems

When you have the first good sleep youve had in like a week I’m on mobile someone add a pic

me on a date: so what do you think about breadsticks?

them: dude I LOVE breadsticks!

me, shoving breadsticks into my purse: Well then fuckin help me like idk how many more I can fit in without the Olive Garden staff catching us

This is surreal

why is this sentence written with such perfect comedic timing