“yes, C’mon — A, Press A!” Lili Urges. Yet, At His Reluctance, She Can Only Playfully Roll Her

she waits at the bottom with bated breath — it was barely a hump but still! lili was allowed to have her reservations, especially when minkyu says it’s his first time skiing! lili was not a worrisome person but she would not have filming be halted over something that could have easily been prevented.

“slow down, ski bunny, we don’t want you melting the mountain.” her giggles are muffled by her gloves.

“but a higher one?” she’s amused by his eagerness but she nods, nonetheless. “alright, i think we can do another after this, let’s see if that little hill wasn’t some fluke, alright?”

she’s thankful to be back in the lodge after an afternoon of skiing — it had been fun but the cold had started to get to her. her skii clothes while fashionable were not exactly the most functional to wear on the slopes and after an hour of being out on the mountains, the chills had started to seep into her bones.

walking beside minkyu, she pokes at his side, once more eager for a hint to the surprises he had teased earlier. “so, what’s next? a hot air balloon to whisk us to some snow getaway?”

They say the bunny hill is the easiest, but Minkyu’s legs clearly didn’t get the memo. The moment his skis tilt forward and gravity takes over, his knees wobble like jelly, his balance teetering on a razor’s edge. Clutching the ski poles with the desperation of a man holding onto life itself, he hurtles downhill - not so much skiing as he is surviving.

What takes mere seconds feels like a slow-motion lifetime, but somehow, miraculously, he makes it to the bottom. No falls, no dramatic wipeouts, just a slightly chaotic descent ending in a wobbly slide to her side. He’s anything but graceful, especially compared to her serene glide, but he’s in one piece, and that’s what matters.

“Phew! Not too bad, huh?” he grins, striking an exaggerated victory pose, chin tilted high in mock pride. It only takes a second before he dissolves into laughter, the tension melting from his shoulders.

Then he looks at her, really looks, and the admiration in his eyes softens his smile. “You looked like a gliding princess up there,” he says earnestly, voice warm. “Seriously. So pretty.” And he means every word. “Let’s go to a higher one next,” he says, his grin widening. “I’m all warmed up now!”

thank god it’s not the ugly burger outfits she had seen during the briefing. it was the least they could do — hitting rock bottom in terms of stage outfits shouldn’t be a given, not when they were already putting their vocal chords on the line with the atrocitious catallena screech.

( honestly the sound alone had begun to haunt her in her sleep )

she steps towards the selections, cycling through the arrangements with a pursed lip — fingers flipping through the outfits with an discerning eye, noticing that the names had, in fact, been hung alongside the attires. oh, it was as bad as she had feared. 

“i hate to be the bearer of bad news.” she didn’t, it was probably one of her favorite things to do — but this was maylin, and lili couldn’t help but have a soft spot for the girl. so, she chooses to ease her into the burn — if one could call it that. “but — alright,” turning away from where she had spotted their name tags alongside the outfits, she takes maylin by the hand and corners her attentions.

“would you rather be a tuna nigiri or a salmon maki?”

 not that it would matter, but wasn’t it more fun to build the suspense?

the silence came rolling in, along with the carts of hats that stared back at the girls. maylin could have sworn she saw sparkles for a split second. while the others were giddy and filled with excitement to wear such clothes and perform on a stage that would be broadcast to the public, maylin could feel her blood temperature drop for a second.

talk about the digital footprint.

the brunette's arms dropped to her side in sudden disbelief. she figured this round of costumes would be a bit more unique and different, though, this was as unique as it got and with how significant it was for the actual song - there was no avoiding her fate. "i truly can't believe i will have to talk about this exact moment when we all debut. we'll never live this down." dramatically, yes, but every word that came out was true.

"do you think we get to pick out which outfit we want? that would at least allow me to not feel so burned."

@LGCENT just posted a photo!

soaking up the springtime sunshine

#lgctrainees #lgcent #xulili

“should i?” 

a hand models the ring, flashing it here and there, watching the light catch it in the most harmonic of ways. the glint is appeasing, and lili hardly said no to things that were offered — especially pretty things.

it was awfully on brand of her.

a cold brilliance wishing to be eclipsed by a warmth she couldn’t quite give herself. maybe it was why no matter her internal qualms that she so frustratingly and rather involuntarily projected, she still wished to be around jisoo — like a moon caught in it’s planet’s orbit. 

she wants to scoff, but she reserves the bite for a smile, albeit an amused laugh that she hides behind a hand, sparkling ring and all. “bite — as if you could ever bite.” she looks over him at the computer screen that held stills of their latest shot, pointing out one of the slides where the lighting hit her the best but still held a small cover of a shadow, much like a waning moon. “i like this one, the lighting was a nice call.”   

gorgeous, but deadly - she had an aura about her that fit the moon. difficult to reach, a bit cold, a nice contrast to the warmth that haru could convey. or was he describing how they were acting to one another right now? they didn't quite resolve everything from their last instance, and now they danced in limbo. ( again. again ! ) maybe they'd orbit each other that way eternally. and besides, its not as if he's acting against her role. it just happens to be his brand. and happens to be his commercial that he's looking over. she could just pretend he's not here... actually, no she can't. it'd look so badly upon them both since they were around others, and a tarnished name or reputation was difficult to wipe. "you can keep it if you like it," jisoo comments in response to her, albeit a bit nonchalantly. he's leaving the answer in her court for her to say yes or no, that she possibly couldn't.

this isn't quite an olive branch though, but what would it take? at least they were being cordial right? ".. feel free to chime in too, lili. we don't bite here." the swap of the set gave him an opportunity to actually discuss things with his model, if she wanted to, that is.

໒꒱ . WORKSHOP OPPORTUNITY # 002 _ IDOL JAPANESE: THE EVALUATION 、 aka “LILI, CAN YOU TEACH ME JAPANESE?” I SAID 「はい、はい」

the unfortunate thing about all this is that when pushed, lili pushes harder.

and lili wouldn’t call what they did pushing, per say. unless you could call dangling lili over a cliff with nothing but herself and ichika as a safety net below her pushing — then so be it, they pushed her.

because lili did not like to be pushed around.

despite the practices for that nostalgia show the girls were all participating in, she had this on top of it — and lili was no stranger to overachieving and doing too much in order to appear as pristine and as put together as possible. even if it meant, forgoing necessary ailments such as sleep and food, lili was going to prove them why they shouldn’t push lili to do things.

in the grand scheme of things, the evaluation comes in a blur — her prepared speech, ran through and corrected by ichika with alarming quickness is something lili can only warrant from her own neck-breaking determination to get things done right. even if she had gone into this workshop not knowing a lick of the language — she could at least call herself somewhat knowledgable — if not, able to say more than yes. 

she goes through the motions, remembering the sounds of the vowels — trying to not trip over them as she slows her words, carefully, because the more she quickened her pace, the more she stumbled over them. taking a breath, and with another smile, she begins — in a banter with her partner, thank god at least they knew what they were doing, while lili felt like she was still dangling from that tell-tale cliff, searching for a savior. 

the breath helps, it eases the nerves tickling the back of her neck. her smile used like a shield in the midst of a battle against herself and the evils who had put her in such an uncomfortable position. never had lili felt this unprepared — even if she had spent every waking moment of the past three months preparing for just this — she still felt uneasy. 

was this is? 

her fall from grace?

( finally tumbling her from  her overly egotistic, completely arrogant pedestal that no one but she had put herself upon? ugh, the ground would probably hurt from a fall like this, wouldn’t it? )

these are things she keeps in her back pocket for later — for when she’s to complain about her downfalls and her supposed weaknesses to jang insung — a laundry list, really, of her woes and why she still doesn’t quite understand why she was placed for such a workshop. 

sure, she learned japanese — but at the end of the day, lili only did so because she had felt undermined, so really …

who was the winner in all this?

lili wouldn’t think it was she — begrudgingly, least said and never something she’d say out loud, it had put another notch on her otherwise ridiculously overachieving and accomplished belt — at least, she wouldn’t admit to it as so.

BIRTH NAME   —   li yifei (李亦菲) LEGAL NAME   —   xu yifei (徐亦菲) ENGLISH NAME   —   xu lili (徐莉莉) KOREAN NAME   —   seo yeokbi (서역비), seo lili (서리리) BIRTHDAY   —   january 01, 2001 BIRTHPLACE   —   beijing, china BLOOD TYPE   —   AB ZODIAC SIGN   —  capricorn FAVORITE MOTTO   —

it is not enough to be good, if better is possible.

RANDOM FACTS   —

took ballet for twelve years

born in beijing, she moved to los angeles when she was 7

was adopted by her grandmother when she moved to the usa, there she gained dual citizenship

can speak 3 languages: mandarin, english and korean

her favorite color is baby pink

was about to debut in a low-level company but was dropped from the lineup for 'unknown' reasons

is very much into fashion, enjoys thrifting and calls vogue and harper's bazaar her bible

loves sour candies, her favorite is sour tamarind-flavored candies

claims that her last meal would be an iced americano, sour tamarind candies and malatang

loves spicy food, and the more it numbs her tongue, the better

loves wong kar-wai movies, especially in the mood for love and chungking express

is very into nail art and always, always, always has her nails done

her favorite singers are christina aguilera, britney spears, mariah carey, sza and ariana grande

YEAR END GOALS   —

debut

work on her whistle register

challenge herself with more difficult choreographies

PREVIOUS APPEARANCES & PROJECTS   —

n/a

MOST MEMORABLE EVENT   —

n/a

“There was about her a wildness that flashed in her eyes. She was spoiled and beautiful and easily bored. She was either fiercely excited or cool and detached.”

— Kendra Bean, from Vivien Leigh: An Intimate Portrait (via violentwavesofemotion)

໒꒱ . DATE LOTTERY # 2024 _ THE DECISION 、

it’s almost sickening the way the nerves crawl upon her skin — because what did lili have to be nervous for? it wasn’t like this was some end of it all will she or won’t she a la the bachelorette; it was whether or not she’d like to — as they say — ‘continue the adventure with their current partner’. and if she said no, she could always call minkyu the next day and it'll be fine — right?

( it would all be fine? )

and as nauseating as it did sound — because whoever came up with seriously needed to be re-enrolled in romance 101 — lili couldn’t find it in her heart to deny it.

even if it went against all her principles — and maybe lili liked to think she was a better person than someone who’d reject one of her closest friends and then be fine with spending the day with them as if nothing had happened — she knew deep down that: she wasn’t a better person.

and she was just the type of person to do such a thing.

but when the cameras rolled and she’s asked the dreaded question, lili is answering before she can even tell herself that her mask was slipping.

“i’m glad it was minkyu — if anything, relieved?” she tastes the word on her tongue — as if testing it, the korean phrase a hard sell for a foreign linguist. lili nods, once she’s reassured that that is what she means. “that my date was with him. i don’t normally share much of my personal life — my childhood with many people — but since i’ve met minkyu before, being able to show him something that’s so dear to me was really nice. i think it made us closer.”

and she really did — think — that it had made them closer, rather in the superficial sense that lili usually built her relationships — in particular with minkyu, bolstering him around town with her black card through meals and little gifts — the fact that this had neither to do with any of the above made it different, made it feel different and lili still couldn’t quite describe that feeling other than … nice. it was — it is nice.

“and i think that’s why,” she pauses, licking her lips as a finger catches a stray hair before pushing it behind her ear — building the suspense through a charming grin and a small, gentle hum before she nods. “i’d like to go on another adventure with him, wherever that may take us.” 

because even if lili pretended that she was fine with burning bridges and acting fine, another part of her — the needier part that had spoken in harsh tongues and pleaded her not to — had already shown too much of her real self in the form of a happy childhood memory for all the world to now see. and she couldn’t deny that because of this, lili — whether professionally or personally — didn’t want the world to see her burn a bridge that she had now, despite her initial refrains, cemented in stone. 

“who’s that again? show me a picture.” lili was nothing but a visual learner — it also kept her mind off of trying to figure out how to shove herself into those unseemly nintendo characters. 

maybe she should have taken a page out of minseo’s book and browsed the extensive animal crossing critter catalogue — there was amany of those, the possibilities endless; but she had already dressed as a sexy fox last year; this year she wanted to do something different.

“more of a nerd than the one who came up with this quasi-alice in wonderland treasure hunt? what’s with these cards?” though fun to find, she was wondering what the point of these were. and yet again, another ‘eat me’ falls into her hands.

Halloween never gets old for maylin. every year brought something new and exciting for the dancer to try out. planning her costumes a month in advance was the way to go, but with this new theme, she could never use it unless she was lucky next year. to say she wasn't pissed off is an understatement.

there was no way in hell she could come up with something cool on such short notice and her disappointment showed in her expression, bottom lip jutted out into a pout as she ventured out into the decorated halls of lgc. whoever created this theme would get some words from her (anonymously, of course).

"whoever picked this year's theme is a nerd... who wants to dress up as Nintendo characters? what are we, five?" maylin grumbled, eyes scanning the halls for any sign of some kind of card they had to retrieve. she had already found the 'drink me' card stuck inside the beverage machines. why she participated in these things, she doesn't know. but it was a good excuse to be at lili's side while they chatted. "after doing a lot of research on who even belonged to the franchise, I did find those bayonetta characters. they are the sexiest characters I could find."

and possibly the only fun characters that ranged between any mario or animal crossing game that seemed to be their most popular creations to date.

his absence doesn’t escape her notice — 

it wasn’t that she was used to him being early, rather she was used to him, well, being there. and the fact that he wasn’t, lili could not help the unease it brought her. teeth gnaw at her bottom lip, pencil scribbling away at nonsensical nothings did little to appease her, and now the anxiousness she felt had begun to swell from within. who else was she to launder her unending, and inconsequent, annoyances to but him — and especially now where the topic of the day was of a history that she had absolutely no interest in whatsoever. who had time for games when the game of life was already taking deep pleasure in fucking with her?

when he makes his timely entrance, she takes note of the on the dot punctuation with a purse of the lips and an amused lift of a brow. “as a matter of fact. you just made the top of the list,” teeth primly hidden behind a smirk as she taps the end of her pencil against his hand when noeul shifts her way. “did you oversleep?” her gaze roams from the reddening of his eyes to the curl of bedhead that had obviously been missed in his haste. 

chatterbox

It was rare when he showed up late on Saturdays, but today was one of those days where everything went wrong for him. From sleeping past three alarm clocks to not closing his water bottle and spilling the liquids in front of apartment door to not being able to catch the the bus.... That should have been the final straw for him. He should have went back to his bed, but instead, he bursts through the door a minute before the educational session starts. It all fell too familiar to him attending his college courses. Was he in limbo? Was he being tortured?

He settles next to Lili, slumping over the table and directly on top of his backpack, which he could use as a pillow. No. He forces himself to sit upright, lifting his hands to rub aggressively at his eyes with the back of his fingers. "What are we learning today? Did you start taking notes, hm?" He playfully leans closer, pulling at her notebook to peek at the page. "Is this your hit list, Lils?" He audibly whispers in English, lisp evident when he utters his nickname for her.

@lgclili