“you’re Right,” She Sighs — Side-eyeing The Trainer, Utilizing Her Most Famous Confused Expression:

“i bid you no harm!” raised above her head, lili rises from where she had been laying in secret; where the hope of the other passing by her undetected had been all but lost, lili knew it was better to admit quick defeat than harbor another’s ire unto herself — she already had enough of that with the authorities. 

( she could only hope her picture plastered all over the kingdom’s posts did not do her justice )

she emerges from the shadows, slowly. assessing the situation with every dire step she took towards the unknown voice, if necessary, lili would run — there was no knowing how far she would get, but if all else failed, it would be her first prerogative to get the hell out of there.

 in the light, her eyes adjust, blinking for effect as she settles her gaze upon the other girl — and to her surprise, relief floods her, immensely. hands sought unto the girl’s wrist as first chance, nearly pummeling over the other in her rush. “miyu!” she couldn’t believe her eyes, what were the chances? had her luck changed? could miyu her lucky charm, per say? “w-what are you doing here?” the poisoned gardens hadn’t been the first place she would have pegged the other to venture, but then again, neither would lili be caught dead there, as well, if it hadn’t been exactly the place no one would come looking for her. 

━━ gyeseung | blossom ( @lgclili ) 

what drew miyu to the poisoned garden was mainly curiosity. though she had never truly been interested in the art of healing, her parents had tried desperately to teach her the tricks of their trade. seeing the dimension in the pocket realm, something pulled her towards it. she's forgotten most, if not all, of the craft, but is determined.

her journey begins and miyu starts to seek out a certain ingredient that will help restore the shine to her instrument, something to help polish it. it's an act of defiance in a way; using what she'd found in a way that her parents would turn their nose up to. she doesn't intend to stay in the garden for twenty days, not concerned with gaining poison immunity.

in fact, she'd rather get in and out as quickly as possible.

there's no map, no directions, but there's a picture burned in miyu's mind of what she needs to harvest. after searching for what feels like days, she's tired and ready to turn back. until she hears a rustling behind her.

"who's there?" she shouts, eyes darting around the area. miyu listens carefully, waiting for a response, sensing that someone else was in the area. "are you a friend, or are you a foe?"

satisfied with his answer, lili only beams in response. maybe she should call it luck that the cameras were rolling — getting an complimentary answer from minkyu as so has never been easier. 

“alright, alright, picasso. i can’t wait to see what you come up with.” she teases, eyes shining bright as she looks from the set of colors she had already swiped to her side to him. 

every now and then, her eyes briefly glance his way — a mirror of the image she was trying to transfer to the kite itself. unfortunately, lili was no artist — not in this way at least — but she makes the most of her materials and does her best to her strengths.

in the end, her kite looks more reminiscent of those old school shoujo mangas she and taeha used to pour over back in high school in between competitions; how she had remembered such a small detail is beyond her — but here it is, drawn in it’s full length: accented with big yellow stars and overly-drawn pink and blue flowers to surround the image of minkyu in the style of a shoujo protagonist from the 90’s. 

her ears perking when she hears his completion and she immediately snaps up the kite before his eyes could take in what she had made — smile already just that bit triumphant and overall pleased with what she had come up with.

“okay — i’m ready.” she takes a breath before initiating the countdown —

“one …. two …. three!” 

once sung, she spins her kite in time with his only to feel her lips crinkle in amusement; laughter already on the cusp of her tongue as she tries to choke out a — “is that supposed to be keroppi?? or is it kermit?” 

Off-camera, if this were truly Lili and Minkyu in their natural states, her comment about Hollywood actresses would be met with a snarky reply;

Minkyu would likely respond with something along the lines of how she’s pretty cute, but there’s no way she could compare to someone like Anne Hathaway.

This, of course, would all be in playful jest, never serious, always lighthearted. But the cameras are rolling, and while Minkyu always strives to present his most genuine self to the viewers and fans ( slash girlfriends ), he knows this moment calls for sweetness;

it's a moment meant to quicken Lili's heartbeat and those of the audience.

So he gives her a sweet smile, one that seems reserved solely for her, and gently lifts his free hand to fix a stray lock of her bangs. "You should already know you're much cuter than any Hollywood actress." he says, his voice soft and sincere.

Even as they sit down, his perpetual half-smile remains, his eyes scanning the array of tools before quickly picking up the right markers and pens to decorate the kite.

"You'll be surprised. I'm the modern Picasso!" he declares with a playful brow wiggle in her direction, almost charming, before his focus returns to the kite.

He's chosen the same colors as her favorite plushie, even attempting to draw a chibi version of it. Though it hasn’t turned out perfectly, it's recognizable enough.

After a few minutes, he looks back up, a grin on his lips as he hides the result of his craft with his arms. "Okay, let's show what we've created on the count of three!"

a hand shoots up — “wait, wait — i said i sucked, i didn’t — do you think i’m a loser?” should she get her ears checked? did she, lili xu, actually sound that bad for ichika to immediately dismiss her as the affronted and absolutely — totally uncalled for — damning title of ‘loser’?

she feels herself default — not from discouragement — but the shock. never had lili ever felt herself feel so crestfallen — so rug pulled out from under her bewildered. again, it begs the question of: why was lili even here?

lili groans, feeling a crease iron itself permanently between her brows in concern. “was it really that bad?” lili was no japanese maestro but even she didn’t think she had failed as miserably to deem it — oh, god, lili didn’t even want to repeat it again.

she sniffs, bringing the stylus back to the document she had pulled up on her ipad where the rest of her diligent — but messy in the way a chaotic mind like lili could only understand — notes lay. “fine, if that’s what you think is best.” she taps the end of the pen against her cheek as she thinks.

“it’s supposed to be a mock of some hosting event, right?” she asks for clarification — “how would i even begin?”

In all honesty, Ichika did feel for some of her trainees. She had assumed that they would come with more experience but seeing that someone like Lili was being asked to perform without much exposure well, the more she thought about it, the more on-brand it seemed. When she was a trainee, there had been girls who had been chosen to take part in LGC Girls Japan with very limited Japanese, and some of them had been given more lines than she had. As long as you were able to make it work, what was the problem? Or so, she assumed the mindset was. 

“You are not a loser,” she replies even, shaking her head slightly. “You’re only a loser if you do not try.”

And to her credit, Lili does try. Ichika had dipped her toe into learning Mandarin over the last year, but for someone to ask her to host with a trace of fluency would have been hard. “You /are/ improving.” She assures the younger woman, “So long as you show effort, that’s what’s important. I want you to keep practicing your pronunciation and I’ll see about preparing you a phonetic script to practice with. If you can show confidence in speaking and continue to practice, a lot of errors can be forgiven. I’m sure you experienced that when you first came to Korea, as well.” 

Unlike the other two, Ichika knew that Lili went through a similar situation when she came to Korea years ago, and with that alone, she knew Lili was not a loss cause. “Actually, how about this: I want you to write down what you want to say and we can work on translating it. We can work from there.”

CHALLENGER APPROACHES ❗️❗️ XU LILI AS ❪ BAYONETTA ❫

call it an act of rebellion or a battle of wills — or maybe lili was just tired of playing the role of the ‘woe is thou’ and wounded — but the second she found out her grandmother had once again cancelled on her once again, lili was done playing a facade that was barely holding on by a thread. tape and plaster could do little to hold up what once was, such tools were futile to what true care and attention could do. unfortunately, lili knew such a thing — so, maybe in hindsight, it was better to shed these masks rather than cling to their rugged shards.

abandoning her role to play, sitting there to listen to a meeting that had nothing to do with her except play appearances was not how she wanted to waste her free time. the downfall of her crude decree of renouncing these responsibilities were that they had to fall on someone …. and sadly, that someone had to be yutai.

when she arrives, she comes with a consolation — or was it a perceived condolence? — in tow, a box of chocolates she had picked up in cheongdam on her way over. ducking into the fluorescence of the convenience store, she taps him on the shoulder with a passing hand; nearly missing his cup of ramen as she drops the dressed up chocolatier tote onto the counter. “as a thank you for your service today.”

it was lili’s best way of apologizing, even if an apology would never leave her glossed lips. ( it’s like they say, better than nothing, right? )

✧⁺ DIMMED LIGHT: @lgclili

yutai hated still being present in his family's lifestyle, but there was no helping it. this was an alternative to the promise he couldn't hold up with his mom. since he couldn't become a model within a year, he negotiated new terms that allowed him to still train but make appearances when summoned.

though today's dinner wasn't one he was summoned for, instead he volunteered to participate in it for a dear friend of his.

sometimes, he did things he didn't want to do to save the burden of those he cared for. he knew that when lili's grandmother canceled, she would have preferred to not show face when she was hurting. so being the friend he is, he decided to go instead of her and sit through the long, boring conversations about a business he didn't care for.

when he messaged her to meet up with him at a convenience store so he could fill himself with good ramen, he expected no backtalk from her. not today.

standing by the window, he mixed his preferred dinner (even if it wasn't the healthiest) and waited for her to show up so they could talk about all the things she missed out on.

truth be told, lili had been using the fact that she was a foreigner as her golden ticket. not being able to understand this or that had done wonders for getting over-zealous coaches to get off her dick back, even if she 100% did understood this and that, they didn’t need to know that, right? right. 

and it seems that the girl before her had the same exact idea in mind.

“not really, just felt —” she pauses, thinking over her words. “today wasn’t my day.”

she snorts, eyes passing over to the coach who still hasn’t let up, hovering to the side — trying his hardest to understand a tongue he’d never quite master. “obviously.” for that — lili could not help the smile curl upon her lips, warm and welcoming — something so much unlike her, lili would have felt a chill roll up her spine if she had been the one to have seen it firsthand. 

so she stands to her full height, shoulders rolled back as she picks up her forgotten yogurt cup and takes the other up on her offer. “what did you say your name was?” she tosses the cup to the far-end bin, off to the side. "i'm lili."

Amelia feels some what connected to the other female. It was like she was similar to her and enjoyed chaos as much as she did. Of course, her being of Chinese descent too made their connection even better. Amelia maintained her expression in order to hide her true intentions from the staff around them.

❛ Yeah I've been there before. Is there a specific reason or-? ❜

Amelia noticed the other female's eyes and a slight smirk appeared on her face. So perhaps she was up for some fun and a chance to mess with the coach. Amelia, still speaking Mandarin, explained her thoughts. ❛ Well, clearly the coach can't speak Mandarin so we could have some fun with this. I'm feeling chaotic today. ❜

PITY PARTY: PARTY OF 1 ୨୧ @lgcjisoo / BACKDATED (010125)

the humiliation burns.

and yet, lili would rather wear the flaw like a bright red ‘a’ a la scarlet letter. if hester prynne could be prosecuted for the shame of adultery, could lili’s crime be considered of that multitude?

what had been her crime again?

ah right — existing, was it?

on the eve of her birthday, for what lili had thought was to be her birthday dinner — she had invited jisoo on the pretense of such — they gathered around a long mahogany table : filled with food, left untouched ; conversation, guided by the xu matriach, none other than lili’s grandmother ; and people lili could not place or fathom to know.

was this truly her birthday dinner?

her grandmother had introduced it as so and yet, despite the first sentence starting and ending with lili — everything that followed had nothing to do with the girl who was at the cusp of turning twenty-four that night. and she was floored, utterly embarrassed and speechless at the obvious display of neglect. 

was she supposed to sit here, look pretty and take this disrespect? the way her grandmother stares her down from across the table is a clear answer.

an obvious one that lili finds she doesn’t want to listen to — grabbing her purse, she tugs on jisoo’s sleeve, slamming her heels to the ground as she stands. “let’s go, we still have to pick up your dog from the daycare, right?”

she lies through her teeth — thinking on her feet for some semblance of an excuse only to find the piss-poorest one, and yet her eyes flash a demand for jisoo to get his ass out of that chair. 

his reaction is one that she does not expect. her eyes slow to the sigh that she pulls from him — a raised brow in expectance to an explanation she knows she’ll never get — nor does she really deserve, they weren’t friends. at least not in that way.

mere acquaintances, really, if lili were to categorize hyunsoo as anything other than some boy she liked to annoy. ( with a list that seemed to grow longer and longer by the day as she learned of new things to prick into his side like some voodoo doll ) 

“why — mama’s boy isn’t fighting with his — oh, wait — are you guys really?” she wants to laugh — but the hilarity of the situation has since left her the moment his mother had decided that a text or two would do her no good and had gone as far as calling her grandmother and inviting lili for lunch with the motive of baiting her. 

now that was never funny, lili liked to play games — but not when they were played without her consent. 

“i would but now, i’m interested.” she says, though, instead of turning off her phone, she moves to block his mother’s number — hoping at least this could be the end of this thread — then thinks against it, letting the phone screen fade to black without another click.

Lili's presence brings out a certain side of Hyunsoo — one not quite seen by his casual friends and coworkers. It is a special sort of relationship the two of them have; if one could even call it that. The woman had a way about her that he could only see during the get togethers and fleeting moments within the luxurious circles he wished he could leave behind. Lili serves as a reminder that he would be unable to stray too far from his roots.

"I don't know what you are referring to..." The statement is as plain as his tone, the tail end muffled as he takes another sip. His eyes follow hers as they flicker here and there. He even turns his head back to the coffee truck just in time to see one of the baristas ducking to pretend she's been busy at work. He forgoes waving for an amused chuckle.

By the time he returns his attention to Lili, a phone screen is presented in his direction with a barrage of texts from his recently estranged mother. "Or who you are refe—"

A heavy sigh falls from his lips. "I am not reading that," his fingers grip his straw, tempted to run it through again out of sheer irritation; he folds it instead. "Can you not tell her that I am too busy to contact her now? Or... ignore her. You are not responsible for me, nor her middle man."

໒꒱ . BLACK BANQUET # REFLECTION 、

when asked to reflect — inquiries under the pretense of theory and hypothesis — lili feels this is legacy’s own way of leashing them. a toxic reminder that the wrong attitude could land you on the wrong side of the public masses all wrapped up in a situational ‘what if’ of an interview. 

so, lili sprinkles a little truth in each answer — but not too much, even if her own thoughts on the matter were of little concern. 

“it doesn’t really matter to me — i was just in the background, but it is kind of annoying that they’ll have to reshoot a bunch of stuff though. i’m sure the production staff must be exhausted, and i feel sorry for them. it’s a pricy mess, too.”  

truthfully, if lili had been a little more committed to the project, she probably would be frustrated. but since she wasn’t —

“what type of scandal?” she teases, before shrugging her shoulders — her face flattening to its default blankness as she thinks about it. “i'd probably do the opposite of what han sohee did.” she fanned the flames of her own  demise, really. 

didn’t she know the general public loved a tragedy — tearing down a blinded-by-love starlet was probably their afternoon snack in between their boring 9-to-5 and 5-to-9. 

“it would have blown over if she had just put the phone down,” and unilaterally kept her head down. ugh, the thought of it makes lili want to scoff. if it had been a man — he would have been praised for his blatant display of genuine love. but since it was a woman — lili tries not to frown. “people forget in time, or when another piece as equally — or better yet — more interesting drops.”  

from a realistic standpoint, lili thinks it’ll only be a matter of time before she’s accused of having an attitude problem — standing at the pinnacle of a misogynistic society does that to a person, especially if said person was a woman. she wouldn’t be surprised if she was prosecuted for even less than what han sohee had embroiled herself into. 

where they differed was that lili would never sacrifice career and face over a man — not when such a man did nothing to shield her from the backlash. god, reading the headlines the weeks before nearly had her gagging. such a waste, she thinks.

it’s easy enough to say it’ll never happen to her — but no one really knows the future, and lili was a time bomb ready to explode at the most minor inconvenience. “there’s really no avoiding a scandal — people try to make the most smallest of things into something newsworthy, it’s just the truth. getting in front of such a situation would probably be the smartest.” hiding things that should be kept hidden could only work so well — and for the filthy rich — but lili liked to think realistically, and while she liked to think she didn’t have anything to hide, there were some things she knew — about herself, her life, through experience — that could quickly turn from her sweetest advantage to the professional-fatal knife in her back. “that or being a nice person but no one is a perfect saint.”

most especially, lili.

lili speaks with an ease of someone who didn’t care of the eyes on her — then again, when had people looking at her ever mattered?

in fact, for lili, it was always the more — the merrier. 

she basked in the idea of eyes on her, whether or not, it was deserved. lili was vain, ambitious and had the cut-shit guts to get what she wanted— this she knew. and it was this same thirst and vanity that she saw in spades in jieun — maybe that was why it bit into the very envious tremble that she kept at bay beneath her smile. 

“oh but of course — we all know how some actress can be so, so high and mighty. primadonnas.” the words dance along a line of dismissiveness but her smile speaks otherwise, directed to jieun in a way only lili knew the other would recognize. like a snake as it slithered up to your throat, coiling tight in between words that could have been passed off as nothing. 

( except coming from lili — it was never really nothing ) 

“you guys have that saying right — the more a diva fusses, the more they try to compensate for their … shortcomings, is it?” she feigns the slightest uncertainty — as if her lack of korean fluency would tangle her words. “but you don’t have that problem, though — you’re always so well taken care of.” 

old vices are hard to relinquish, even when she has become a better person and is on her best behavior on the set. it's that same space that makes her wary of the friendly grins that would easily pull the rug out from under her.

it doesn't help she is there too, in a habitat that jieun judged natural only to her and her fellow actors, staff and production team, mingling around the people she tried so hard to impress and to make see her in a good light. especially now.

so even if the conversation a few steps from her is irrelevant and she's busy reading the script by herself as she waits for the next scene, jieun is somewhat alert. enough for the scoffs and good samaritan masquerade not to go unnoticed, but she doesn't look up to check who they are talking about. she doesn't even need to, because it only takes a couple of seconds for one of the managers to kindly offer her a cup of iced coffee.

"oh? you're a lifesaver! thank you manager-nim," she smiles genuinely as she takes the coffee and the man runs somewhere else, probably after another actor he had to take care of ( he wasn't even her manager ). the actress turns to face lili and flashes a smile at the girl, sipping her drink.

the subtle implications that jieun is making his life hard or abusing her power hit a nerve — not that it was hard to rub her the wrong way. jieun was guilty of many sins, but she never mistreated her staff or co-stars as her work and everyone in it were important to her. but, right now, she can only swallow her annoyance and do what she does best: acting.

"oh yeah, he is always in a hurry but is very attentive... it's not easy to look after so many of us," she points out with a grin, keeping it safe in case anyone eavesdrops. "it's a relief to know there are so many people looking after them too. you know how rude some celebrities can be..."