Blakemadden​:

The Great Gatsby (2013) Jay Gatsby

blakemadden​:

Blake couldn’t help but swallow hard again, little did the man in front of her know just how frightening the circumstances were for him but instead she’d chosen to lull him into a false sense of security just for the chance to fend off his anger a little longer. She knew Leo had a temper, he was fiery which was ironic since that was one of the things that made him so hot sometimes, but it was also genuinely scary in others. Like the one just moments ago she seemed to have conveniently forgotten with every passing second because the way he was looking at her made the girl feel like she was the most important person in the world. The power he had over her, was significant. “Well, i wasn’t stupid enough to think you’d want to carry on sleeping with me if i told you i was pregnant.” That was…a white lie because she had thought that, but it had been overpowered by the knowledge he was the father and the need to hide that from him. He had a wife for gods sake, the whole thing was madness.

Her eyes locked with his as he spoke about how she was the one who had ended things somehow managed to tug on her heartstrings, her thumb brushing gently across his shoulder. She’d pulled away from him this was true, but for a very valid reason. Not that Leo was about to find out. Still his mention of not trying anything made her knees feel weak because the implication was that he’d otherwise be willing to do so. Actively wanting to do so. And god she had missed the way he used to touch her. “You can try something…if you want…” The words came out in a small whisper, only loud enough for him to hear, eyes still trained on his lips.

“But don’t you want sex more when you’re pregnant?” He questioned, the first question his mind went to. Sex, another addiction that he clutched onto just like he did the bottle. But her decision was more than reasonable. He became stoic for a moment, giving it actual thought. Would he continue to sleep with Blake while she was growing another man’s baby? His eyes skimmed over her now, taking in the effects that pregnancy had on her body besides her showing belly. What he found was that Blake was still Blake, still mesmerizing, but most importantly her assets were fuller and rounder. He could only imagine just how her body looked like now. And something primal in him caused his nostrils to flare with his next breath.

“If I want?” he questioned, confirming the transfer of power she had handed to him so easily. His eyes had continually watched hers so it wasn’t at all hard to notice that her gaze was so prominently on his mouth. He parted his lips to not say a word but to let his tongue swipe his bottom lip as if to regain moisture to the flesh. But he knew what he was doing. It was always so simple to be a charming Casanova when he became sexually awakened like this. He moved carefully and closely to her to make sure only she heard his next words. “I’ll always want to… but I won’t until you beg me.”

miavxga​:

When Mia has asked someone random, she wasn’t expecting him to be so good looking. For a split second, she had forgotten why she approached him in the first place. Mia was grateful that he didn’t reject her request. If she had to go to someone else, it would’ve been obvious that she was trying to stay away and it could’ve gone worse.”Maybe.”  her eyes never left his when his arm wrapped around her. Her own free hand grazing up his arm and resting on the back of his neck. Her fingers, gently brushing the ends of his hair. 

At his question, her eyes shifted to the male that continued to watch. It was clear he was getting upset that she was now in the arms of someone else but he wasn’t budging. “Still watching.” Her eyes flickered back to Leo for a moment. “I think this might make it believable. Sorry about this.” she murmured, as her eyes then fell to his lips and leans in to press hers against his.

-

Picking up chemistry with his unexpected co-star was such an simple feat. The longer she was in his arms, the more comfortable he was in the role. It also scratched his ego in the same way her fingers did at the nape of his neck. This was completely fine. He was doing such a good deed and a free drink to act? It was much more than any audition would give him nowadays.

They were putting on a good show for the audience of one, a scorn drunk man who couldn’t take the hint. Or at least, Leo thought they were doing enough, but apparently intimate gazes and touches weren’t doing it. Her apology had barely registered in his ears when he felt the soft caress of her lips upon his. He didn’t flinch or hesistate, completely commiting to the scene. His eyes closed, and his face relaxed. Though in his head he was reeling over how his flesh was so easily manipulated to kiss another woman who neither had his name or his heart. His lips moved upon hers, being firm yet gentle, but closed. An on-screen kiss. His arms, however, completely wrapped around her warm waist. He held her closer to his body as the kiss lingered on. 

Leo pulled away with the softest of sighs, his nose touching hers before completely pulling away. His eyes opened, and it was clear that he was in a bit of a shock. The whites in eyes widening around blown pupils as he looked back at his quote unquote love interest. He cleared his throat though his voice still came out raspy, still in shock, “Okay, now that better have worked.” He cleared his throat again. “Or else, I’m gonna need more than one drink for second base.” He joked, hiding behind humor to get over the unique experience. He was completely sober in this intance and he began to really feel the guilt of his actions. His left hand dropping from her waist as his wedding band felt heavy around his finger. 

renfarber​:

She’d asked. She shouldn’t be so shocked, because she’d asked if he’d gotten rid of it. But she didn’t actually think he would have done so. It made sense; of course it did. Ren had shattered their relationship, right at the moment it was at its most perfect. They’d been deliriously happy, they were making plans for the future, they were obsessed with each other, and unwaveringly in love. So of course he’d been blindsided, and heartbroken, and furious. Of course he’d thrown away the key.

But making sense didn’t make it hurt less. She didn’t want to reason with herself about it, about how it shouldn’t feel like a knife to her heart to see the empty space where the key to her lock had been. Or how the pain and anger in his eyes now shouldn’t break her heart just as much as it had nine years ago. It just did. 

In one swallow, she downed the rest of her drink, setting the empty glass on the table between them with an unceremonious thud. 

“Fine,” she said, staring quietly for a moment, watching him tug his sleeve back down, covering the empty patch of skin where his love for her used to be. She had a question on the tip of her tongue, and for a while it stayed there, stubbornly refusing to be spoken. But the alcohol was loosening it, and she said it anyway, as she poured herself another drink. “…Why did you kiss me?”

-

He watched the way she absorbed the information. But really what was she to expect? Leo couldn’t stand to look down at his own arm because the tattoo was reminded of her absence in his life and his arms. He even missed the stupid way their matching tattoos would meet when holding hands. He had to get rid of it. Those kind memories had morphed into ones where she had made the choice to entangle herself with someone else. It made him sick either way. It had to go. 

Leo swallowed before taking in a deep meaningful breath. Her question had knocked the air out of him, and cleared his head from the pain he had became friends with. The only thing filling his senses now was her. Her scent. Her face. And the way she tasted when he kissed her last. He brought his drink to his mouth to suppress it, but it was too late, the alcohol tasted painfully sweet like she did. He downed it, easily, and like her - he placed the glass down with a thud. 

His dark gaze moved along her features like a caress, but his face stayed neutral. “Because.” He said as if that were a complete answer or sentence. He didn’t want to tell her the truth. It would just be pathetic. He was done with feeling like some love sick fool, especially over her. He had been pining for so long - nearly a decade. This hurt was the part of him that helped him grow into someone so heartless, arrogant, and careless with love... all because he couldn’t experience it with her. 

“To survive, I had to stay unfamiliar to myself, neutralized, at arm’s length. Sometimes, I think, all these years later, I’m still hunting the part of myself I exiled.”

Places I’ve Taken My Body; ‘The Broken Country: On Disability and Desire’ by Molly McCully Brown

blakemadden​:

“Okay…” Blake murmured under her breath because she knew what his questions were referring to, not to mention his tone which was full of shock, to put it nicely. Her hand remained on her stomach as he looked down at it, glancing around the train carriage but no one was listening to them. The members of New York were all entirely in the own world, thank god because this was embarrassing enough just between herself and Leo, the baker didn’t really want anyone else to be viewing it. The issue was the train was hurtling through a tunnel meaning she had no way of getting off, and even if she could it was unlikely Blake could move fast enough to stop Leo from being able to easily catch up with her in a second. “Oh I’m just going uptown to see a friend.” Pretending his why was a question about why she was on the metro…which they both knew it wasn’t. “So…yeah…just…heading there.” She shifted from one foot to the other, trying to work out how to play this one.

-

Leo had no care for their surroundings his mind wrapped around all the possibilities and she wasn’t speaking or giving him answers. Why is she the one surprised? When her reply was straight bullshit and nonsense, he was done playing this game. “Don’t-don’t that, don’t play dumb right now, Blake-- don’t do this to me.” Leo spat out through gritted teeth. His adam’s apple visibly tightening in his throat. His mood immediately lunged into anger. How could she play at a time like this? His life as he knew it was on the line. He spared a thought for his wife which caused his hand to grip around her bicep, holding her close and firmly with his fingers overlapping. “What is that? And is it mine?!” His voice not only rising in volume but in vemon. It was like a fuse had been lit and he was ready to set off even more.

renfarber​:

“I don’t know,” she said honestly. There was no why. There was no reason. She’d had nine years to think of it (and many nights therein during which she thought of nothing else), and a couple of therapists thrown in, and all she’d learned was that she’d been scared. Of love, of being loved, of failure, of success… she’d just been terrified and overwhelmed by of all of it. 

“We were so young, Leo. And everyone was telling us that we couldn’t possibly be as sure about each other as we said we were. But I was sure. Even looking back now, I don’t see myself as some stupid kid who didn’t know what love was. I knew what it was, because we had it. It was real, and that was scary. I’ve never seen love work out well for anyone, so I guess I just… fucked it up. I wish I hadn’t.”

She winced slightly at his last words, as though physically struck by them, and was quiet for a moment. “I didn’t… decide to hurt you, that was never what I wanted. I know that I did, though, and I haven’t forgiven myself, so I can’t expect you to forgive me either. But… even if you hate me, we need to try to get along, right?”

-

He was completely enthralled by hearing the story of them from her perspective. Again an insight he never expected to have. She spoke of their love like some tangible and strong element. He had felt the same way. He was so sure of their love because he had been raised without it. Nothing had ever felt so potent or as sweet as his first taste of love with Serenity. He tried. Leo actively tried to fall in love like that again. He looked for the little things that made up Ren in other people. Vihana was actually someone he hadn’t expected. She was beautiful, kind, and took care of him. It was easy and simple because he never really was himself. Even now, she had no idea who he was. 

He groaned with a roll of his eyes. It wasn’t directed towards her. It was energy that he needed to push out. The whole situation they were in now compared to where they were years or even months ago was nothing like he had ever fantasized. He didn’t have the right to be tired of the ride that dipped and derailed from his choices. But he was. There was never a break unless he had numbed himself with his vices. He brought his elbows up on the table, he held his hands together and proceeded to tap his forehead on them. “Serenity,” he said, his eyes closed as he rested on his hands. “I don’t hate you. I can’t ever hate you. I just hate what you did. But I can’t exactly talk now, can I?” He questioned, lifting his head up to look at her once again. “I didn’t exactly get into the situation I am in now by being a good guy.” He said with the glint of calmed chaos in his dark eyes. He didn’t where his mood was going. The alcohol made his veins sting and his attention jump around. Though the weight of his problems just kept trying to follow behind him. He grabbed his glass again to get rid of it. “I’ll play nice if you will.” He said swirling the remaining contents in his glass.

PULP FICTION (1994)

i have feelings for u. not telling u which ones.

annalisechambersx​:

Annie’s face lit up when the man agreed to eat some wings with her. She was honestly expecting him to tell her to fuck off, so that was a very pleasant surprise. And when he introduced himself as well, she smiled warmly and nodded her head, “Leo. Lovely name. I had a friend growing up whose name was Leo.” She paused, “Well, is Leo. He’s not dead.” She paused, “I don’t think so, at least… I’m sure he’s fine. We used to go roller skating around London together.” She giggled fondly at the memory as she sat down in the seat beside him.

Bar stools were always kind of fun. They rotated so she was able to spin a bit as she sat there beside Leo. Hearing his comment, she laughed and nodded again before she shrugged, “I…yes, I do.” Annie told him, “You’re not the first to tell me either.” It was those people who also told her she was overtly annoying, which hurt her feelings but she never told them that. They didn’t deserve that satisfaction, “I know I’m a lot…but I just like to smile and spread that around, you know?”

As the beer was set down in front of Leo, she thanked the bartender and turned her gaze towards him. Her brow furrowed as he spoke and immediately, she felt a wave of anxiety wash over her, “Oh…oh, no. I’m s-sorry. R-Really.” Immediately, she reached over and pulled the beer away from the man and turned around in her chair, hoping she could find someone else to give it to. Annie didn’t really drink beer either but she figured most people did and it was safe choice. Pulling herself from the stool, she approached another man and offered him the beer, saying it was ordered by a mistake. He accepted it and turned back to his friend with a shrug.

As she approached Leo once again, her hands rubbed together nervously and she gingerly sat down beside him. She wasn’t happily spinning this time. She was just still, looking at her hands, “I should have asked what you wanted. That is my fault. I’m sorry.” Annie’s gaze didn’t move from her hands. It just remained there as she waited to be screamed at by Leo like her ex-husband would do whenever she made a mistake like that. She was used to it by now.

-

Leo had stifilled his laughter as she rambled on about another Leo. He mentally tilted his hat to the other man who was still alive, sharing his name. “I believe you.” He said, again holding his laughter in his chest when he heard that he wasn’t the only one who could tell how cheerful she was. She was like the golden sun herself in human form. He was sure if he squinted enough, she had sun rays. 

Leo’s interest was peaked again by how immediately remorseful she was. She kept doing that to him. Dragging him back before he could get out. And he couldn’t help, but like that. Although, the longer he watched her, he could see that his bratty nature wasn’t taken lightly as he quietly intended. Once again, he was too abrasive. His humor too dry. He couldn’t think of anything else that would cause that reaction. He was rude, that’s all he at least knew about himself. he worried about previously about snuffing out her light, and it had materialized right in front of him, because of him. 

His lips had parted to protest her getting up to give the beer to some lucky bastard. She didn’t have to jump to such lengths. Leo was close with the bartender, and he could have done something. He continously watched Annie, closely now as she came back to their barstools. He took in her careful approach back in her seat next to him. His brown eyes not missing a thing as he leaned onto his arms on the countertop. It wasn’t lost on him that the sunny doe-eyed woman beside him had closed up. He didn’t know what it was or how he shifted from wanting the conversation to end-- to wanting to keep it going. It was now a game to make her laugh. “You didn’t have to do all that. Or apologize. I mean, please, buy me as many drinks as you want.” He playfully pleaded, his eyes widening at the notion. “But not beer, I’ve never been a fan, and I’m certainly at the age where I could grow a beer belly.” He explained, turning in his barstool even more towards her.  His body language completely open toward her as he made his self effacing joke. “If anything it’s my fault for not being a stereotypical male.” Again, he was joking but this time making him sound better than most men cause he believed it so. how poignant. “I don’t even like sports much either.”