If I Was An Anne Rice Vampire I Absolutely Would Not Be Joining A Coven. I Am Going To Portland Or San

If I was an Anne Rice vampire I absolutely would not be joining a coven. I am going to Portland or San Francisco or one of those cities full of hot freaks who are into weird shit and I am biting all of my lovers until one of them stays with me forever. Then we're buying a winter home in Tromsø so we can go outside during business hours half the year. Then we're buying a house boat in the Greek islands and another one off the coast of Mexico so we can sleep on the water during the day and spend the night at Mykonos or Cancun. Then we're buying an absurd amount of hard drugs because we can't be killed, and fucking for seven months straight with no breaks. Like screw the brooding and the drama, the second I'm rich and invincible I'm going balls to the wall until Jordan Belfort looks at me with jealousy in his eyes.