Probe It's Memory

"I don't wanna bother you"

Have you considered that this is how your presence feels?

I have the kind of DID where people don't fully notice it beyond 'little' inconsistencies in my personality, religious expression, preferences, pain tolerance etc until I tell them I have DID

And then there's a pause (and sometimes an explanation of what DID is)

Followed by "oh my god, that makes so much sense"

Go follow them!

New

I used to have a blog for EGL fashion but I think I got rid of it because I never used tumblr... Anyway a certain SOMEOME wanted me to make an art tumblr so here I am

genuinely wild to me when I go to someone's house and we watch TV or listen to music or something and there are ads. I haven't seen an ad in my home since 2005. what do you mean you haven't set up multiple layers of digital infrastructure to banish corporate messaging to oblivion before it manifests? listen, this is important. this is the 21st century version of carving sigils on the wall to deny entry to demons or wearing bells to ward off the Unseelie. come on give me your router admin password and I'll show you how to cast a protective spell of Get Thee Tae Fuck, Capital

I've been dealing with having some self-harming ideations lately and that brought to mind an aspect of it that I don't hear talked about much; the phantom pains. Often when I get triggered into a self-harming state, I can "feel" the spots where I would end up doing it. It's as though they are a precursor to it and by completing the act, it just makes visible the pain that was already there. I don't know how common this is, but I figured I'd bring it to light in case others struggle with it too.

[ID]

Panel 1: Kyra is clutching her head and Miss White asks her "What's wrong?" Kyra responds "I'm dealing with self-harm ideations again..."

Panel 2: We see a close up of her arms, her left hand is pointing at the spot on her right wrist, her hand is outstretched, but most importantly there are four dashed lines highlighted on her skin. She says "I can 'feel' where they would be. Like a phantom pain, there's nothing there, but my brain tells me there should be."

Panel 3: Kyra is hunched forward with her arms stretched out behind her, keeping back the looming Creature. She says "And then I have to contend with this A-hole egging me on. It's a rough journey."

Panel 4: Miss White throws her arm over Kyra's shoulder and they start walking. Miss White says "C'mon, let's go get you distracted for a bit." and Kyra says "Thank you. I[t] helps to know I'm not alone."

[END]

characters are so fun!

I hope they won’t haunt every second of my thoughts

imagine you had to do some big presentation at work and when you showed up they'd painted a mural of you doing the presentation in the foyer complete with all your coworkers some of whom are dead or in svalbard and you did your presentation in an ominously lit room and then your manager did a comedy bit with an animatronic and also brought in a whole ass marching band. and the whole time you're worrying about your dead wife in the basement