Louis On Stage In Paris, France - 6/4

A post about jealous Harry

Alternatively: In which Louis’ husband morphs into an actual murderer upon feeling jealous

But why have I taken so long to decide on making a jealous harry post i mean like the distinct brow furrow annihilates my soul 

followed by that reassured *squeeze* and *pat* *pat* though

like we get it Harry, he’s yours

AU: Where Aiden playfully pecks Louis’ neck whilst embracing

and Harry get’s jeal- oh

never mind.

That thigh tap is only necessary if you’re one of those jealous boyfriends……and Harry is DEFINITELY one of those people.

How to Make: Harry Styles mentally plot a successful murder against Liam Payne

Step 1: Hold Louis Tomlinson’s hand. Step 2: Wait for Harry to plot and carry out the murder.

Now this is debatable, but Harry says “stop it” to Zayn ????????

I mean a human being and Louis cannot even so much as socialise without Harry stepping forth to break it up.

Self-explanatory: Harry will have no wieners (other than his own) invading within Louis’ personal space 

If one was to stumble across Harry’s assassination list, the first five dot points would look a lil’ somethin’ like:

Zayn Malik

zayn

ZAYN

ZaYN MALIK

Malik, Zayn

Then the next five points would be Liam

Harry

needs

to

chill

When u anticipate inevitable cock-blockage;

My god, that eyebrow crease could kill the poor man

But Corden should have known; I mean he’s playing on Harry’s turf, he should have seen it coming

Niall didn’t see it coming

Damn Harry’s face drops from 100 to 0 real quick

Louis coped it that night let me tell you

Harry’s internal thoughts: I think there’s a serrated butter knife in the dressing room backstage..

Most of you don’t know this -it’s kept under heavy wraps-, but Harry actually brutally murdered Liam that night, it’s true. The Liam Payne we see today is a mere holographic image now.

Oh, and Zayn didn’t leave by choice, but by threatened force from Louis’ husband.

I think we can all accept this is some low-key jealously but it’s not the reason I’m adding this at all tbh.

I’m adding this because I find it interesting how its almost Harry’s life duty to personally witness and note every single mere contraction of a limb and/or muscle, along with each tendon that moves in Louis’ body; Like even a fucking eyelash twitch you look over and yep Harry saw the lash convulsion

Now this is just getting too comical because I bet you after this interview, Harry gathered the band in a room and explained the guidelines and conditions one must always follow during their wake. The first rule was probably, ‘one must never sit on Louis’ lap if they wish to keep their kneecaps in order to sit again’, Or you know, something along those lines.

Remember the lovebite interview where the interviewer asks if they give each other them “from within the band?” and Liam immediately steps in to avert potential Larry-ness from happening by stuttering out, “Louis gives me these” but then Harry kind of 

It’s a wonder how after all these years, Harry still hasn’t popped a nerve from all that facial straining like w o w

Can we top it off with this because thumb signs are important and Harry’s kitten fond kills me and Louis’ serious and in-loveness kills me too

I hate married couples.

What is he doing???

Can I just say this fandom is so weird around aging... Harry and Louis are getting older. Its natural. Whats wrong with them looking older? I think people used to be more cruel about it with Harry.

yeah idk if they're super young or what but uhhh everyone ages, they're gonna age, you're gonna age, im gonna age, and showing signs of ageing is...... life. literally. it shows that you've survived life for a certain amount of time

How to make a stunt more believable

Alright, some of yall need to hear this:

After they break the news in mainstream media and get people talking, like they have with Holivia, they watch the public’s response. This response has been met with a lot of people calling the stunt for what is it: a stunt. So, the best way to make a stunt more believable is to plant small and otherwise unassuming seeds of doubt that lead people to believe the stunt to be true. 

What does that mean? It means making people aware of things that can be perceived as organic, or that happened by chance or accident.

For example:

A fan sighting 

A leaked picture

A private moment someone witnessed by “accident”

A recounting from someone trustworthy (includes friends, associates and family)

A sneaky pic

Them at each other’s houses (w/ recognizable accessories/background or being told straight up it’s “H’s house”)

Some quality time with shared friends

An “oopsie didn’t see you in the background” video/IG story 

A hack 

Shared clothes/accessories

Driving together 

A recounting of them doing something unassuming together, along with a grainy picture (for example getting food, shopping, coffee, dinner, park etc)

A ‘the paparazzi caught them!’ headline 

Following each other’s finstas

Following friends/family

More IG/social media shenanigans

etc

For it to be the most effective, it’s best for the things above to come from different people and mediums. As in, several different sm accounts, tabloids etc.

what even is personal space???