UPDATE: I FUCKING FOUND IT AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

pro tip:

for titles, shamelessly steal song lyrics. works 100% of the time. you just gotta find a lyrics that works. don't be afraid if the rest of the song doesn't match. that one lyrics is all you need.

for summaries, just copy and paste a couple paragraphs from the story. it doesn't even matter if they properly describe what happens. just add a melodramatic "OR.... (simplistic two sentence description of what happens)"

works every time.

writing is hard but coming up with a cunty title and catchy summary will slay even god's strongest soldier

i get so fucking frustrated by those fics where tim is being forcibly raken care of by the batfam. you know the type? when recently orphaned tim drake gets stuck with bruce wayne and then bruce just gets all weird and icky and parental and maybe it says sometHing about me that that type of interaction makes me so uncomfortable but it does. and i’m not talking abt fics where tim WANTS to be there. i’m talking like, Liminal Space (which is great you should check it out), where bruce just won’t let him leave.

like stop it! you are taking awya his agency! he is TRAPPED HERE! he does not WANT TO BE HERE! you are gross and icky and i know its supposed to sweet and fluffy and parental but ITS NOT its just wildly wildly uncomfortable. he is capable of caring for himself! i dont CARE if he “shouldnt have to” if he WANTS TO and if hes a legal adult (by age or emancipation) then LET HIM.

struggling because i actually wrote the fucking fic i said i would write but now i CANT FIND THE POST WHERE I ASKED TO STEAL THE IDEA AND NOW I CANT GIVE THEM THE FINISHED FIC. WHAT. WHY. AGONY.

gotta love those scam bots asking me to commission them, its like... dude. this is a chatfic. wdym "loved the prose"??? was it when i had Character A call Character B a gay idiot? was it the fucking crowbar threat??? huh???

i dare you to writr some soft percabeth fluff

debating whether or not to write some soft percabeth fluff

in my heart red robin does not have a cowl. he has a domino mask. condom head!red robin? i dont know her and i dont want to.

spent way too long deciding on hair color

picrew tag game! 🖤🔪💋 picrew: https://picrew.me/en/image_maker/257476

I did two bc the hair options were so so so cute and I couldn’t resist loll. also if there is a lollipop option you can assume I’m going to use it bc I’m a candy addict 🍭

tagging @vilecemetery @rottingangel9 @eloisesecret @preposterousray @sparklykat-hideoutenthusiast @shubhadeep385 @urlocalbone @mossterious @butterflypython @voidze @goddessdiary @heavensentfawn @noisette-tornade

and anyone else who wants to join

crazy how fanfic authors drop the most beautiful and gorgeous pieces of work ever, leaving you speechless and sobbing at three in the morning as you quietly contemplate the masterpiece you just read

and they don’t get paid for it they just do it because they’re having fun and they want to share their joy with you

like I would literally die for all of you fanfic authors out there reblog to swear your allegiance to fanfic authors

Bruce finds out when Tim gets hurt on patrol and Jason breaks into the fucking Batcave, scoops Tim up, stares into Bruce’s soul and says “You’re a grandpa. Congrats.” Before dipping

Tim and Bruce getting into an argument bcs Tim demands to be independent and NOT get involved in the mess of being a legal part of the Wayne family, and Bruce being final on the fact that Tim is FIFTEEN and needs a legal guardian. out of spite Tim asks the person he thinks Bruce would approve of as a guardian the least to sign some guardian papers.

Tim: you don’t have to do anything parental i just REALLY wanna make Batman mad and i get the sense that our wishes align on that specific aspect so if you could just sign here for shits and giggles-

Red Hood:

Red Hood, rapidly changing his plans on how to deal with getting revenge on Bruce because his replacement is actually kinda hysterical: if we’re doing this we’re fucking doing it right, kid

Bruce shows up to Tim’s next parent teacher conference because hey just because he’s being given the silent treatment over this whole adoption thing doesn’t mean he’s going to slack off on his parental duties, only to freeze in the doorway because Tim Drake-Hood is stood there with his shiny new CRIME LORD LEGAL GUARDIAN giving him the most SHIT EATING GRIN POSSIBLE, and he almost has a panic attack on the spot.

Jason’s really getting into this whole caretaker thing. he’s doing school runs, delivering home cooked meals to Drake manor, helping with homework, this was his fucking CALLING. Tim is having the time of his life because him and Hood actually get along really well, but then he realises two weeks in that it turns out Hood is actually Jason fucking Todd, and he has to deal with the existential crisis of causing the very thing he was trying to stop because he is now technically a legal child of the Wayne family.

out of embarrassment for the fact that he failed and amazement at the fact that he’s bonding so well with Bruce’s dead kid and his own childhood hero (who is now a badass crime lord that lets him call for advice about english assignments while organising drug runs and picks up batburger on his way home from weapon shipments, seriously what more could Tim want in a parent), Tim somehow becomes even more invested in hiding Red Hood’s identity than Jason is.

Bruce has just been in a constant state of panic for the past three months and he doesn’t know what to fucking do. Dick was concerned for Tim up until he demanded to have dinner with him and his new ‘guardian’ to vet the guy and Jason, who stopped caring about his identity when he realised how much being a working dad agrees with his mental health and is only actively keeping his identity from Bruce for Tim’s pride’s sake, takes off his helmet to eat and Dick stares at him frozen for fifteen minutes across the table before finally pointing at the two and saying ‘you know what? he didn’t even tell me Jason was dead until after the funeral. whatever the fuck’s going on here? he has it coming. proceed.’

there's this one tim drake dimension travel fic where he gets yeeted to a dimension with a better batfam by mr. mxypltzk (how tf do you spell that) and bart and kon come with him. i remember specifically there's this one scene where tim is practicing in the batcave and the alternate batfam are just... appalled by the amount of force he's using. because they Don't Do That in their dimension.

AND I CAN'T FUCKING FIND IT. I CAN'T FIND THE FIC. IT BRINGS ME GREAT PAIN.