I Get So Fucking Frustrated By Those Fics Where Tim Is Being Forcibly Raken Care Of By The Batfam. You

i get so fucking frustrated by those fics where tim is being forcibly raken care of by the batfam. you know the type? when recently orphaned tim drake gets stuck with bruce wayne and then bruce just gets all weird and icky and parental and maybe it says sometHing about me that that type of interaction makes me so uncomfortable but it does. and i’m not talking abt fics where tim WANTS to be there. i’m talking like, Liminal Space (which is great you should check it out), where bruce just won’t let him leave.

like stop it! you are taking awya his agency! he is TRAPPED HERE! he does not WANT TO BE HERE! you are gross and icky and i know its supposed to sweet and fluffy and parental but ITS NOT its just wildly wildly uncomfortable. he is capable of caring for himself! i dont CARE if he “shouldnt have to” if he WANTS TO and if hes a legal adult (by age or emancipation) then LET HIM.

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gotta love those scam bots asking me to commission them, its like... dude. this is a chatfic. wdym "loved the prose"??? was it when i had Character A call Character B a gay idiot? was it the fucking crowbar threat??? huh???


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i see no cons.

i volunteer as tribute.

This post is for ladies only. If you are a guy, GET out of here.

I bestow upon you this dagger. It is an ancient dagger. Use it wisely.

BEHOLD THE SCRIPTURE

Is there a word that’s a mix between angry and sad

struggling because i actually wrote the fucking fic i said i would write but now i CANT FIND THE POST WHERE I ASKED TO STEAL THE IDEA AND NOW I CANT GIVE THEM THE FINISHED FIC. WHAT. WHY. AGONY.


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I just had an Idea. What if Damian met Tim during the time he was training with Lady Shiva? I’m like 90% sure Damian trained with her at some point, and I know for sure that Tim did. So what if they met through her?

then when Damian ends up in Gotham he recognizes Tim not as Robin but as lady shiva’s apprentice. I imagine it would go smth like this:

Tim, opening the door: Hi

Damian: Timothy?

Tim: Damian???

Damian: Why are you here?

Tim: I live here. Damian: *shocked murder baby noises*


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obvs

Please reblog if you think that “they/them/theirs” is a valid set of pronouns.

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We’re fanfic writers, we stare at a wall imagining beautiful prose for hours before writing precisely one sentence, getting writer’s block, and flopping to the floor in defeat.

We're fanfic writers, we spend hours researching an incredibly niche topic we know nothing about so that we can have one sentence be factually correct


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there's this one tim drake dimension travel fic where he gets yeeted to a dimension with a better batfam by mr. mxypltzk (how tf do you spell that) and bart and kon come with him. i remember specifically there's this one scene where tim is practicing in the batcave and the alternate batfam are just... appalled by the amount of force he's using. because they Don't Do That in their dimension.

AND I CAN'T FUCKING FIND IT. I CAN'T FIND THE FIC. IT BRINGS ME GREAT PAIN.


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uh huh. I'm delusional. and we definitely did NOT read the same comics. because that was indeed abuse. that was verbal abuse.

damian took every oppurtunity he had to insult and demean tim. he did this specifically to tim, with the intention of causing him harm. that is abuse.

(please note that I am talking about Early Damian. like, when he first arrived at the manor. he character developed After This. this is even pre-damian-becoming-Robin.)

Damian Abused Tim and None of Yall are Talking About It

First of all, let’s define an abusive relationship. Okay? “Abuse” is not characterized by- say it with me now- age, gender, strength/size or otherwise more “common” depictions of an abusive relationship. “Abuse” is characterized by a- say it with me now- POWER IMBALANCE. Got it? Good.

Now, let’s examine Damian and Tim’s relationship to see if there’s a power imbalance with one simple question. Do they both have the power to redefine this relationship? In the case of Tim and Damian, the answer is no. An immediate follow-up to this question should be: who has the power to redefine the relationship? The answer is the more powerful side of the power imbalance, or, more often than not, the abuser. In the case of Tim and Damian, Damian is the one with the power to redefine the relationship. 

Why? Because a), both Tim and Damian’s adults (Bruce, Alfred, maybe Dick) are unwilling to balance the relationship (giving them both consequences for cruelty, no favoritism, etc.), b), Damian does not accept anything Tim says- if Tim is polite, he’s being patronizing/condescending and it’s his fault, if Tim’s rude he’s being cruel/unfair and it’s his fault, if Tim’s indifferent he’s being cold/unfair and it’s his fault- as a genuine effort on Tim’s part, meaning only Damian has the power to change their dynamic.

Just because Damian is younger than Tim does not mean that Damian is incapable of being abusive towards Tim. It reminds me of a dynamic in which the “softer” one, e.g. a wife or in this case, a younger sibling, is abusing the “tougher” one, e.g. a husband or an older sibling, and the victim of the abusive is not believed because the “softer” one obviously can’t be an abuser. By excusing Damian’s actions you are practicing abuse apologism. This is Very Fucked Up and it is Not Okay. Just because DC seems to think it is okay and the majority of the fandom brushes past it, it does NOT MEAN that it is not abuse apologism.

I am not blaming Damian for any of this. No one has ever bothered to explain to him that his actions are wrong or explain why they are wrong. However, that does not absolve him of responsibility. Responsibility is not the same thing as blame. In this case, responsibility means an actual, genuine apology on Damian’s part. Responsibility means acknowledging it was wrong of him to abuse Tim, it means an actual change in behavior going forward, and, specifically for Damian, it probably includes therapy. 

Abuse apologism is not okay. I need people to understand that Damian was abusing Tim. There is no excusing or sugarcoating it. Damian. Abused. Tim. I need people to understand that. Yes, Damian can accept responsibility (and the ADULTS- Bruce, Alfred, maybe Dick- need to accept the blame) but that does not change the fact that in the beginning, He Abused Tim. Yes, Damian can (and should) make a change, and that change should be reflected in his characterization, but if one were to write him in the BEGINNING he would still be abusing Tim. I am not demonizing him by writing this. This is not me bashing on the character. This is me defining his canonical behavior. This is me telling you all that Damian was entitled and spoiled and rude and cruel and ABUSIVE.

I need you to understand this.


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iamthespleenlesswonder - tim drake my beloved
tim drake my beloved

I answer to EITHER Ruby or Azalea, she/her. Send me asks about anything.

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