THERE’S A DISCORD???

What?

ladies and gents may i present you with my favorite photo of Ella Fitzgerald ft. that guy

homie was down bad, and can we blame him?

funny phrases to use when something goes wrong instead of jokingly saying "i'm going to kms":

i'm going to kill god

i'm going to delete my blog

i'm going to explode

i'm going to blow up this entire website

i'm going to become the joker

this is going to be my villain origin story

i'm being so brave about it

fuck it we ball

god had to nerf me because i was too powerful

i'm too pretty for this

all according to plan

feel free to add on

“Somebody I used to know” is a Kleinsen song, and I will not take criticism. 

(Gordon Ramsay in Gollum’s cave) fuck me it’s dark in here. jesus christ. What the hell is that? A fucking wedding ring? I’d rather get a divorce. holy mackarel(he stumbles in the dark. In the distance he sees a silhuette sitting on a lone rock island in the middle of a lake) oh for fucks sake. what the hell is that thing? It’s eating raw fish. the fish is fucking raw

my favourite instagram account is "wheredoesthepeecomeout" and it's run by a girl who asks men on tinder where cis women pee from and then documents their answers