Never Knew I Needed Rosie And Katy Killjoy To Be Gossip Buddies So Bad Lmao

So, something I learnt the other day. So, you know how dinosaurs supposedly can't see you if you stand still? Well that myth is based on real-life lizards/etc and how eyes in general work. So, once my dad starts infodumping, here comes some other cool information. We, humans, can in fact, also not see something unless it's moving. We fixed this by having our eyes constantly shake. And then our brain compensates for us, so we don't have to have shaky vision.

What if aliens don't have this? Like. What if they find out when one of us was looking at something in the distance, and they walk around this thing that's in front of them, and the alien is confused so they bob their head and oh, there's a thing there, but how did the human know that, and then we explain and they're like, horrified.

Humans are apex predators. They can hunt in packs. They can hunt in pairs. They can hunt on their own. They're persistance predators, which is unheard of. They get stronger when they're mad or scared. They have this thing called 'body language' which acts like a type of hivemind, even if they'll claim it isn't. And. They can see you. When you're not moving. They can still see you. If you ever find yourself in a fight against a human, for whatever reason? Run. Run as fast as you can. And hope, pray if you have a religion, that they won't follow.

“It’s okay to not be okay” is dumb

I propose “it is within standard deviations to be dysfunctional” instead

but did you go to taco bell?

Of course I did I’m not a monster

He tried his best but there’s so many—

Bonus:

imagine the cursed cat alastor sitting on sir pentious’ egg bois like a brood hen.

Cheetah mask! I had to try glueing the nose on three times and it’s just not hitting the spot 😔

Really proud of the eyes, though!

Deaf dog training log: part 1

I’m petsitting/housesitting for my aunt and her dog has gone entirely deaf in her old age so I’m gonna try teach her sign commands

First I am establishing a reward signal, and I have picked “shine on shine on” from watching Ms Frazzled videos on Facebook (I wiggle my fingers). She is not a dog trainer btw she does satire videos about gentle-parenting entitled adults. Anyway every time I give Sandor scritches I smile and do Shine at her to establish the hand signal as a reward because she can’t hear clicker noises. Once she catches on I will teach her commands.

Also here’s your dog tax

Kicking my legs like Alastor in ep 6 with glee

Beauty and the Demon

Once upon a time, in a faraway land, a young prince lived in a shining castle. Although he had everything his heart desired, the prince was spoiled, selfish, and unkind.

He was also a serial killer.

One winter’s night, an old beggar woman came to the castle and requested for shelter from the bitter cold. The prince thought she’d be an easy target, and invited her inside. But she saw through his fair facade, and the old woman’s ugliness melted away to reveal a beautiful enchantress. She knew that there was no love in his heart, and as punishment, she transformed him into a terrifying demon, and placed a powerful spell on the castle, and all who lived there. The prince didn’t particularly care about his servants, and replied:

But if the prince could learn to love another, and earn that person’s love in return, then the spell would be broken. The prince was aromatic and also a prick, so he didn’t need to worry about either of those things, and continued to slaughter his subjects indiscriminately. As the years passed, his servants fell into despair, and lost all hope.

Until one day…

And so, the girl was sent away, and the prince never learned to love.

The End

Fucking why

he’s just a boyyyyy

He’s so silly I love him

Another part of a comic that is not a comic anymore it will be a silent movie bc I cannot voice act for shit

Again this is an apple keynote ppt that I turned into a gif. help

I lied I’m too into this

Have some unhelpful and super vague instructions that are not friendly to crochet newbies while I work on the real pattern. UK stitch names btw

Crochet an oval that fits to the second joint of your finger, then add a few rows of double crochet until it fits over your curled finger. You will need eight of these and they will probably all be different sizes.

Slip stitch the middle and ring finger together about a third of the way (e.g. if they’re both 18 stitches crochet 6 stitches together), then add a row of double crochet around the outside of both.

Slip stitch the index finger to the other side of the middle finger. Make sure it’s exactly opposite to the ring finger (e.g. 3 stitches of middle finger on front and back, 6 stitches connecting each other finger). Double crochet around and slip stitch the pinky to the opposite side of the ring finger while you’re there.

Double crochet around the whole lot, decreasing 2 stitches in the palm every row or two until you can put the fingers on and reach the base of your thumb. The thumb is just a magic circle with a couple increase rows and then double crocheting around. Slip stitch the thumb to the rest.

Keep double crocheting around and decreasing if needed for a snug fit. Test how easily you can slip them on every few rows to make sure the fattest part of your hand can fit through.

The palm pad is a circle and the outside two rows have this pattern: [dc, htr, tr, htr, dc, sl st] three times to make the clover shape. The theta delta is optional or can be swapped out for smth else but it’s just stitched on.

The finger pads are tiny ovals. Like two rows. Test where to put all the pads on while you’re wearing the glove to see the best placement for you and stitch them on.

Not pictured is claws. Do a tiny cone starting with a magic circle of 4 stitches and increase only on one side to curve the cone into a claw shape. Try different sizes and placements and stitch them on the paw tips.

hi chat!! I’m planning on making a youtube video about DIY gear options besides the typical masks and tails. I need some examples to show, and I love sharing other’s art, so if you’d like your work to be featured reply/reblog with pictures and descriptions!! This includes crochet, jewelry, knitting, sewing, anything else that you made that you associate with your kintype!! This is open to any alterhumans, especially fictionkin with obscure ‘types- but any alterhumans are welcome!! Your work will be credited of course, links to your blogs will be added to the description.

Reblogs are encouraged for reach even if you don’t have anything to share!!