Getting Business Done

What are you hiding there James, hmmmm????

Ohhhh myyyyy!!!!!

Rockies Christmas - Day 8

Warnings:  Fluff, the big reveal

I reach over to James’ side of the bed.  It’s empty.  I listen.  He’s not playing.  Then the smell hits me.  He’s in the kitchen.  I tumble out of bed and tidy it up.  Looking around, he’s taken care of the clothes we’d yanked off each other last night.  Grabbing a pair of leggings, a tank top and a long, big knit sweater, I head to the bathroom.  A few minutes later, I’m heading to the kitchen.

James, wearing sweats and a Raiders t-shirt, is working on the roasts.  The coffee pot has already been started.  I lean on the end of the counter, my chin in my hands, watching him.  He smiles at me, kisses me, “Merry Christmas.” 

“Merry Christmas” I answer.

He has both roasts panned and opening one oven door, slides them in side by side.  “I’m going to have to rotate these a couple of times.”

“Why?”

“Well side by side, the middles won’t heat correctly unless they get rotated.”  He closes the oven door.  “I was able to get them into one oven.  That way the other is free.”  He washes his hands then turns to me.

“I like having a big kitchen” as I let him pull me to his chest.

“Me too.”  He strokes my hair.  I sigh in his grasp.  “You good?”

My hands cup his face, “More than good.”  I kiss him, “Excellent.”  I kiss him again.  His hands grab my ass and pulls me closer.  “Later” I whisper at him.  He wiggles his eyebrows.  “If you want cinnamon orange rolls, you need to let go of my ass” I say sweetly.

He almost jumps back, hands on my shoulders, “Yum!!”  I giggle softly.  “What do you need?”

“A couple of the big cookie sheets please” as I pull out several tubes from the fridge and set the second oven to preheat.  I show him how to unroll and re-roll the pastry.  After putting the pans into the oven, he helps me make up the frosting.  I stop a moment when the light catches my ring.  Here I stand in the megarocksuperstargods’ kitchen making breakfast with him.  His eyes bright with joy.  A goofy grin plastered on his face.  We both smile hearing the sounds of his kids waking up.  I grab a couple mugs and make our coffees.  James is back at the stove scrambling eggs.  I think those are the only kind of eggs he knows how to make.  But they are good.  Sitting on a barstool at the counter, I watch him.

“Morning Dad.  Merry Christmas” Marcella yawns.

“Merry Christmas Marcella!” James replies cheerily.

Making her own coffee she looks at me.  “He’s always super happy cooking.”

Raising my eyebrows, “You should have seen him earlier prepping the roasts.”  Looking at me over the rim of her coffee mug, I just nod.

Swallowing, “Really Dad?  Two?”

“They didn’t get the big one in that I’d ordered, so I had to get two.”  He smiles at his youngest.

The others all wander into the kitchen, stretching, yawning, rubbing eyes.

“Are those your eggs Dad?” Castor asks.

“Well, I didn’t lay them.  I just scrambled them.”

Everyone groans.  “Not your best Dad” Cali says with a grin.

“It’ll get better” James smiles at her.  The timer dings, “Now.  These are Kira’s creation.”  He pulls the rolls from the second oven.  I let them cool a minute then top them with cream cheese frosting.

Castor grabs a pile of plates and hands them to Cali.  Then the silverware.  All the kids pitch in to set the table.  The huge skillet of scrambled eggs and a pan of frosted rolls are set in the middle of the table.  I hand James his coffee mug, he pulls out a chair for me, taking the seat next to me.  For a time, there is silence.  I watch Cali.  She smiles at me happily munching on a roll and nods.  I scrunch my nose at her smiling back.  I go to clear my plate when CGF takes it from me.  “Nope.  You cooked.  We’ll clean.”  She makes a shooing motion to both James and me.  Grabbing our coffee mugs, we move into the living room.  The lights on the tree are already on.  James turns on the fireplace on low – the stockings hanging over it do have chocolate in them - then the stereo.  The Boston Philharmonic is playing Sleigh Ride.  Very loudly.  Grimacing slightly, James turns the volume down.  Then he sinks into the sofa next to me, draping his left arm around my shoulders.  With his thumb, he turns my head and kisses me.  My right hand caresses his scruffy chin.  “I didn’t want to wake you with my shaver” he whispers into my ear.  I kiss him, “Later.”  He snorfels into my hair.

The kids all come into the living room and stake out their spot.

“Who’s going to play Santa?” Marcella asks.

Pointing to my head, “I think the newbie should.”  There are happy yeses from all the kids.  He gives me a look, “Besides, she knows the Big Guy.”  I smack his thigh as I stand up. The kids are giving James looks. “Yeah, here.”  James pulls out his phone showing off the photos of us with Santa after the Parade.  I hand out the packages under the tree.  I slip Cali the bag with the photo frame in it.  She smiles at me.  I reclaim my seat next to James.  He holds up his hands, “Wait.  Where’s the ….”

“I got it!”  Castor holds up a large garbage bag.

Giving his son a thumbs up, “Way to go!  Let’s start!”  Pointing to MBF, “Closest to the tree goes first.”

The next three hours are spent opening gifts.  Each person taking a turn to open one gift.  The wrapping paper balled up and tossed toward – and sometimes into – the garbage bag.  A couple end up under the tree. Then the next, and so on.  James would occasionally go check on the roasts. 

After opening the necklace that I’d given him, James puts it on.  His gift to me is a baguette cut garnet tennis bracelet.  I immediately put it on.

After the gifts are opened, Marcella hands out the stockings.  Which were mostly little things.  I see Cali whisper to CBF before picking up the bag.  He picks up his phone. 

“Hey Dad.  I have one more gift for you.”  She hands James the bag.  Total confusion covers his face.  I twist sideways to watch.  Pulling the tissue off the frame, its backwards.  Turning it around he just stares.  “You do have to wait for the delivery on this one.” 

His face pops up to Cali’s.  “Is this…”  He pales a little pointing at the sonogram.  He’s holding the frame like it’s a crown jewel.  “you’re?”  She just nods.  I see all the others gasp.  “You’re going to be a Mom?” 

Again, she nods smiling.  “And that will make you Grandpa.”

James covers his mouth with a shaking hand, a single tear streams down his cheek.  He stands and pulls Cali into a hug.  Turning them both, he looks at me, “I’m going to be a Grandpa!”  The others join in the hug.  There’s laughter all around.  James pulls Cali away a bit, “Does your Mom know?”

“I told her before our flight yesterday.”  CBF rests his hands on her hips.  Concern spreads on Cali’s face.  “Dad, me and CBF don’t really want to get married.”

James cups his daughters face, “You don’t have to.”  He kisses her forehead and pulls her into another hug.  Looking at CBF, “You do have to participate.”

“I will.  That’s a promise that I made to Cali when she told me.”  CBF smiles at her, “I didn’t know my Dad.  He left my Mom before I was born.”  He looks at James.  “I will be a Dad.”

Grabbing CBF’s neck, “That’s what I want to know” James smiles at him.

Cali goes a little pale.

“James.”

He turns to me with Cali still clutched in his arms, “Yeah.”

“Cali needs to use the bathroom.”  I smile at him.  “Like right now.”

James looks at Cali, then releases her.  She trots quickly to the bathroom.  James looks at me.  “You knew.”

Shrugging, “I figured it out.”

He sits back down, “How?”

I smile at him, “I used to work in an office filled with women.”

“Oh.”  He looks at me again.  A goofy grin spreads on his face, “I’m going to be a Grandfather!”

“You will be the Mighty Grandpa Het!” Cali exclaims, returning to the living room.  Laughter fills the room.

For a time, we just sit in the living room amongst the opened gifts talking.  James checks on dinner a couple more times.  He leans over the back of the sofa, his fingers on my shoulders, “You need to get the rest of dinner going.”

I grab our empty coffee mugs, stand and follow him into the kitchen.  James has the roasts resting in their pans on the butcher block counter.  I get the sweet potatoes going in the oven.  The green beans pan gets put on the stove top.  The rolls are put in the cooling oven the roasts came out of.  I pull out the gherkins, the olives, James’ horseradish, and my jellied cranberry sauce.  Marcella, CGF and Cali put the items into the serving dishes and put them on the dining room table.  I pull out the sweet potatoes and add the marshmallows.    CGF grabs the biggest platter and hand it to James, who begins carving one roast.  Grabbing a couple of hot pad holders, I take the sweet potatoes to the dining room.  Cali puts the rolls into a basket covered with a napkin.  She puts the basket on the table.  Going to the kitchen, I plate up another orange cinnamon roll and set it beside Cali’s plate.  She just laughs at me, her eyes sparkling.  Castor and MBF get the drinks for everyone.  James brings in the big platter with his carved roast on it.  He takes the head of the table.  Pointing to the chair on his right he looks at me.  Grabbing my Severed Lime, I sit in it.  The others claim seats at the table.  CGF pushes Castor into the seat at the other end of the table. 

Sitting, James holds out his hands.  With my left hand, I take his right and hold out my right hand to MBF.  And so it goes around the table.

“I don’t usually pray before a meal, but I feel it today.”  I squeeze his hand.  “There is so much around this table to be grateful for.  The joy.  The laughter.  The unions.  The new life.”  He looks at each of us, “I thank God that I am here today with all of you.”  There is a chorus of ‘Amens’ from the table.  James gives my hand a squeeze before letting go.  “I suppose the best way is to pass plates for the roast.”  The next several minutes are spent passing plates and dishes.  That’s followed by the sound of silverware on the dishes.  I wrap both my feet around James’ right ankle, smiling at him.  “How is it?” he smiles at me.

“Dewishous” I say around a mouthful.

“I need a cooking lesson from you James” MBF says.

“A roast is easy.  Comeback in the summer and I’ll teach you how to grill” James smiles at him.

“Dad’s ribs are the best!” Marcella exclaims.

“I kinda enjoy his steaks” I volunteer.  The flash memory of us having dinner at this table during a freak Sept snowstorm floods my brain.  I can tell by his smile, that James is thinking the same thing.

The conversation moves from grilling to cars to the weather to past snow trips to sports.  There’s a ton of laughter.  A few sad memories, but on the whole the smiles win out.

As James stands up with his plate, again CGF speaks up, “You two cooked.  We’ll clean up.”

James sets his plate back down, “I will finish carving the roasts.”

Holding her hands up, “That I won’t argue with.”  She smacks Castor’s shoulder, “Maybe you can learn how?”

“Still shredding the meat son?” James gives Castor a look.  Castor rolls his eyes at his Dad.  “C’mon.  Let’s work on this.”

I grab the dish of gherkins and head towards the kitchen.  Cali is finishing the roll.  I place my hand on her bicep, “There are more on the far counter.”

“Thank you.  They are so good!”

“I’m glad you like them.”  I look at her belly, “I’m glad you like them!”  She laughs.

Christmas dinner is cleared, leftovers stored, the dishwasher started, what didn’t fit in is hand washed and put away.  It’s still snowing hard.

“Now what?” MBF asks.

“Stranger Things!” is the unanimous answer.  A few minutes later, the eight of us are curled up under blankets as another episode starts.

Four episodes later, a break is called for.  Deciding to use the bathroom in our bedroom rather than one of the others, I make the trek upstairs.  James is standing by the sink when I leave the toilet room.  He wiggles his eyebrows at me, “Great minds think alike!”  He smacks my ass as we trade places.  I wait for him, rubbing my tenderized butt.  He washes up after and then grabs me planting a deep kiss on me.  Then looking at me, “I’m going to be a Grandfather.”

“Yes, you are.”  I caress his cheek.  “She was terrified that you’d be upset that they aren’t getting married.”

“As long as the kid doesn’t feel abandoned, I don’t care.”  His eyes darken momentarily.

“I get the feeling that’s not going to happen.”  I kiss him.

“Dad!  Kira!”

“Coming!” we both yell and head to the kitchen

Getting into the kitchen, “Hey, can we have some cookies?” MBF asks.

“That’s why I made them” as I grab several and head back to the media room.

James grabs several and some napkins, “Hey.  Here” he hands me a napkin.

“Tank yhow” I say through a mouthful of cookie.

MBF brings one of the platters while Marcella brings a stack of napkins.  Retaking our seats, the next episode starts.

We finish the first season.  “Should we start Season 2 tonight?” James asks the room.

MBF carefully shifts Marcella’s head from his lap, “I think we’re done for the night.”  Marcella snorfels awake.  She waves.

“Night Marcella” James smiles.  He powers down the system.  “I think it’s beddy boo time for all of us.”  He smiles at me.  I smile back.  “Night kids.”

“Night Dad.”   “Night James.”  “Night Kira.” They all respond.

“Night” I say to the room letting James lead me to our bedroom.  He closes the door, I turn the music on. 

He pulls me to him, “Thank you” he sighs out.

I grab his shoulders pulling his head to mine.  I kiss him.  I giggle.

“What?”

“You had to jump start those eyelids” I smile at him.  “C’mon.”  I flip the covers back.  We both drop our clothes on the floor beside the bed.  James holds up the covers and I slip in.  Laying on my back, I cradle his head on my shoulder.

He kisses my clavicle.  “I can’t believe that my oldest is having a baby.”  I kiss his hair, my fingers gently playing with it.  Minutes later he’s sound asleep.  I listen to a few more holiday songs before letting the sandman close my eyes.

Rockies Christmas - Day 11

Warnings:  Hospital stay, Shameless Product Placement, Fluff – I guess

Guide: CBF = Cali’s Boyfriend / CGF = Castor’s Girlfriend / MBF = Marcella’s Boyfriend {I didn’t want to give them names}

It’s still very dark out the window.  Damn but hospital beds suck.  Especially when you’re sharing one.  But I would not have slept anywhere else.  Still cradled in James’ arm.  His bruised body next to mine.  His face, a little less swollen.  Remembering his split helmet still in his truck, I shudder.  This could have been so different.  I try to detangle myself, but James tugs me gently.  “James, I gotta pee.”

He grunts softly.  “I could piss too.”

“Well, let go of me and I’ll help you.”  I kiss his chest.

“mmmmk”

I climb out of the bed, retrieve the bottle and put it in place.  “Ready when you are.”

“Fire!” he smirks.

I put the gown back and flip the covers back up over him when he’s done.  I quickly make it into the bathroom.  When I’m done and washed – leaving the bottle under the sink – I retake my spot next to him.  His arm pulls me closer.  My eyes close.

I blink awake to the room filled with bright sunshine to find the nurse and doctor in the room.  “I suppose I should move, huh?”

“It would make checking the patient a little easier” the doctor laughs gently.

I slide out of the bed and step out of the way.

The doctor gives James a thorough go over, including rolling him to the side to inspect his back.  The nurse whispers into my ear, “Has he had a bowel movement yet?”

“Not yet.”  I look at her, “Should he have?”  She nods.  “Find me a tool catalog.”  I get a look.  “Trust me on this” I grin back.

“Ok.”  She is obviously thinking, “This might take a bit.”

“Check with the maintenance guys.”

She nods, “Yes!  Great idea!”

“What’s a great idea?” James asks as he rolls gently to his back.

The doctor pats his stomach, “You pooping.”  He totally deadpans it.

I snort softly and James laughs.  Not hard, but enough.  He toots.

“That’s a start!” the doctor smiles.   Reaching for the IV lines, “I understand that you know how these work.  Let’s pop the line off for now and see how you do.”  He removes the IV lines, hanging them from the IV bag holder.  “Leave these in” he instructs as he tapes the ports to James’ arms.  “Before I go, let’s make sure you can stand.  Using a bedpan is the worst.”  Looking at me, “Do you think you can help him?”

“I’m gonna try” as I move to the bed.

James flips the covers back and I help him get his feet untangled from the sheet.  He stands holding tightly on to the bed.  Right leg is good.  Left leg, not really happy.  I move to that side, wrapping my arm around his waist and put his arm around my shoulder, “Lean” I say.  It takes us a bit, but we get into the bathroom.

Grabbing the ADA rails, James sinks on to the toilet, “Might as well try to go while I’m in here.”

“Want me to leave?”

“You’re not gonna want to be trapped in here” as he toots again.

“I’ll get some spray” I smile exiting and closing the door.  The nurse is right there with a can, smiling.  “Thanks!”  Looking at the bathroom door, “Can I please get a second gown for him?”  She nods and disappears out the door.   Looking at the bed, it’s already been changed.  The new sheets and blankets flipped back waiting for James.  The nurse returns with the second gown.  “Thank you.”

“You’re very welcome.”  She pats my shoulder, “At least he’s not being super demanding.  There was a movie star in here that was just a pain!”  She grins at me.  “You got him from here?”  I can hear beeping down the hallway.

“Yeah, I’m good.”  She leaves.  I hear the toilet flush.  Then the sink running.  I crack the door open and spritz the can into the room and close the door.  I can hear him laugh.  Opening the door, he’s leaning on the sink, the hospital gown open in the back.  His bum fully exposed.  “That’s a sight!”  He wiggles it grinning at me through the mirror.  I see the bruises on his back.  “Can you stand a minute more?  I want to put arnica on these.”

“Actually, it feels good to stand.”

I quickly find the bottle and tenderly rub some of the oil into his back, hip and the back of his thigh.  Bending over, I get his shin.  He rests his hand on my lower back, “If I felt better…”

I stand up looking into his wicked grin, “Soon” as I gently rub his penis through the thin fabric.  He groans softly.

“Where are you, Dad?”

“Here, let’s get this on you.”  I pull the second gown on him with the closure in the front covering up his bare ass.  “Be right out!”

I open the door and the kids are all there.  James leans on me to get out of the bathroom.  Castor smacks CBF on the arm.  “Here let us” Castor takes his dad’s arm from me, “We’re a little better height wise.”

“Thanks son.”  James is slow but getting more confident with his left knee.  “Would you mind if we walk the hallway a bit?”

“Not at all Mr. Hetfield.”

James stops and looks CBF, “Call me James.  You are officially part of this family now.”

Cali giggles, “Told you!”

James starts walking, “Forward into the hallway!”

“Isn’t that forward into battle, Dad?” Marcella asks.

“Technically yes, but I am not quite ready for battle” James smirks back.

“I’m going to let you kids take this round.  I want to freshen up some.”

Cali grabs my purple bag and hands it to me.  “I thought you’d like to change clothes.”

I grab her upper arms, “Thank you!” I say a little over dramatically.  She chuckles and follows the others.  I step into the bathroom and close the door.  Grandmother would call what I do a whore’s bath: wet soapy washcloth on the major points.  Face, Pits, Crotch.  In that order.  Then rinsing the cloth out, a wipe down.  Granted, not a full shower, but I do feel better.  I pull on the extra cloths from the bag and stuff the dirties in.  I use the brush quickly on my hair and redo my ponytail.  I’m exiting the bathroom when the little parade re-enters the room, the nurse trailing them in.

James sinks into the bed.  The nurse helps him get his legs under the covers.  Seeing his face a little pale, she says “I think you’re going to want this back.”  She pulls the IV line and reattaches it to the port.  She tapes it securely in place.  “I’ll make it a slow drip.  If you need more, well…” she smiles knowingly at James.  Turning to me, “I’ll check in again later.”  I smile my thanks.

“Hey Dad, what do you want for lunch?”

James lets his head fall back, “A Hopdoddy Bacon Classic!”

“Ahh yes!!  I was hoping you’d say that!” Castor’s face lights up.  “Fries?”

“Both.”

Turning to me, “What would you like?” Castor asks me.  I shrug. 

“Get Kira the Doddy Melt, hold the Comeback sauce on a regular bun.  Or sourdough if they have it.”  James smiles at me, “You’ll love it.”

“Shake?” Castor’s grin is wide.

“Two regular Salted Caramels, please” James is almost drooling.

I dig into my bag, find my wallet and pull out some cash.  I hand it to Cali, “Use this.”

“That’s way too much!”

“What?  You guys aren’t going to eat?”  She smirks at me.  “So, bring me the change.”  I smile back at her.  “And that should cover transportation too.”

“We’ve been using the car service.”  CGF suddenly looks like she said something wrong.

“That’s fine” James grins from the bed.  “Probably cheaper than taxis anyway.  And you’re all in one vehicle.”  There’s a chorus of yeahs and yeses as the kids head to the door.

“Hey!  Don’t forget lots of napkins!” I call out.

“Got it!” comes a couple of responses.

James pats the bed.  I find the bottle of arnica, “This first.”  I pull up the hospital gowns to get to his torso.  I tenderly rub the oil over all the purple spots.  They look horrid.  I gently pull the gowns down and put some on his arm. 

James has closed his eyes.  “That feels good” he rumbles softly.

Wiping off my hands, “The pain meds have kicked in, huh?”

“Not yet.  Just your fingers on my skin feel really good.”  He lifts his head and looks at me.  “When I was in ICU, I had the worst mental image.  Me paralyzed from the neck down.  Not being able to ever feel you again.  Or hold you.”  He scrubs away the tears before they can even fall.

I sit on the bed facing him.  “I cried in the shower that night.”  My hand resting on his belly.  “I take that back.  I sobbed.  I’d spent the helicopter flight in with my own mental images.  The worst was that you’d end up living the horror of your own song.”  I let my tears fall.

“I’m so sorry about all this…”

“James” I cut him off.  “We could have spun out or hit black ice in the Shelby.”  I rub his belly.  “It wasn’t our time then.  This” I wave my hand over his body “isn’t your time either.  The kids have assured everyone who will listen that you weren’t showboating when this happened.  They said that you’d gone to investigate new snow, that your machine started to sink in that snow, so you powered it up some.  And that’s when you turtled.”  I watch James’ face as he nods.  “Castor says that your snowmobile is completely trashed.”

“I wouldn’t be surprised.  But my machine didn’t sink.  I hit something.”

“I saw your helmet, James.”  More tears leave trails down my cheeks.  “If you’d not been wearing it, we’d be planning your funeral.”

He blanches some, “That bad?”

“James.  I wasn’t joking when I said it’s been split in two.  From here” I point to my hairline “to here” my hand stops just past the crown of my head.

He scrubs away another tear.  “Someone upstairs was looking out for me.”  He grabs my hand, “Again.”

I grin, “Being a Leo, you have now used 4 lives.  Please don’t use anymore!”  My fingers trace the flames tattooed there.  I look into his face.  “It wasn’t your time.  You have a grandchild that you need to meet.” 

His head falls back, “I still can’t believe that I’m going to be a Grandpa!”  He looks at me, “So what will that make you?”

“GG” I shrug.  His eyebrows knit together, “Grandpa’s Girlfriend.  What else?” I smirk at him.  He tugs my arm.  I take the hint and lean up over him, planting a deep kiss on him.  I heave a sigh as we pull apart.

“What?”

“I haven’t kissed you in two days.”

He pulls me in for another kiss.  After, “Then we have some kissing to make up on.”

I kiss the end of his nose, “Not here.”  His eyebrows furrow together.  “Because that kind of kissing leads to … well … other activities” as I raise an eyebrow wantonly.

He nods.  “Yeah, this bed is not big enough for those.”

“This bed is barely big enough for you!”  I giggle, turn around and lay down next to him.  He grabs the TV controller and finds the news.  I am rather surprised that he actually watches the whole program.  I rock my head back to look up at him.  “Making sure that I’m not page six” he grins.

“Ahhh” I say, snuggling in a little closer. 

He scrolls to the movie offerings.  We find one that is fairly long and start it.  His fingers play with my ponytail.  The movie is about a quarter through when the kids come waltzing back into the room.

Our burgers are handed out.  James sits on the bed, and we share the bed table.  The boys sit on the floor.  Mine is delicious.  James giggles watching me take my first bite.  The milkshake is thick and creamy with lots of caramel.

“We made a second stop.”  Cali pulls out a box.

James’ eyes fly wide open, “Dirty Islander!”

Grinning, “Yeah, we had to get a couple of these for you!”  She pulls out two rather large cookies that look like James’ eye.  “Black Eye Concussion cookies!”  The room erupts in laughter.  James laughs the hardest, holding his ribs.  Cali points to a couple of others, “These are mine.”

“What are they?” I ask.

“They’re called Mum I’m Preggo!”  Again, the room erupts in laughter.

I pass on the cookies – for the time being – as I still have half a shake left.  I sit and watch the kids and James interact.  He is most decidedly getting better.

The burger wrappers were gathered up and tossed out.  The boys take James for another hallway run.  Cali approaches me, “Kira?”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you.”  She was almost in tears.  I gently pull her into a hug.  “I’m sure these are just the hormones” as she scrubs her eyes, “but I wanted to say thank you for everything.  You were so calm.”

“I guess I got that from my Grandmother.  I don’t think I ever saw her lose her cool.  She always told me that to panic is to lose time and to lose time could be very bad.”

Nodding, “I hope I can be that cool.”  She rubs her belly.

“I hope you never have to.”  I hug her again.

I can hear the boys coming back down the hallway laughing.  Evidently James has been in bad dad joke heaven with the boyfriends, as Castor keeps groaning loudly.  They enter the room and James is walking without help.  A nurse is following.

“Now, don’t you overdo!” the nurse scolds him.

“Naw, he’s just showing off” Castor grins.

James sinks onto the bed, “Yeah, I was that time.”

“All right kiddoes, the adults need nap time” the nurse says with a wink at me and a smile for the others.  “Oh!  Dirty Islander!  May I?”

James motions towards the box, “Please.  But check with Cali which ones are hers.”  The nurse gives James a questioning look.  “She’s pregnant” he dramatically whispers.

The nurse looks around.  Marcella and Castor point to their sister.  “You look great!”  Cali blushes and rubs her belly.  “Now, which ones are yours sweetie?”  The nurse picks out a cookie, “Now out.  All of you kids, out.”

There is a chorus of Byes as they are hustled out the door.  Munching on her cookie, the nurse nods her thanks.  James finishes getting back into the bed.  He pats the bed on his right side.  I grab the extra blanket and climb in next to him, his arm pulls me close.  He heaves a sigh.

“You good?” I look into his face.

“Yeah.  Actually I am.”  He sniffs a laugh, “I still can’t believe that Cali is pregnant.  That I’m going to be a Grandpa.”

I stroke his stubbly cheek, “Well.  Ya are.  Mighty Grandpa Het.”

He snorts a laugh, “That doesn’t work!  I’ll have to come up with something new!”  He tightens his arm around me.  I grab the tv controller and we pick a movie.  He’s gently snoring about halfway through.  I heave a sigh and snuggle up closer.

I feel James shifting.  “You ok?”

“Gotta go.”

I unwrap my arms from him, push him vertical, “You got this?”

Nodding, “Yeah, I think I’m good.”  He grabs the IV bag and closes the bathroom door behind him.  I am scrolling through the movie selection when I hear the toilet flush.  Then water running.  James closes the door behind him, “You’ll want to give that a bit.”  He re-hangs the bag and sits on the bed.

I move up the bed and gently tug his shoulders, “Here.”  He rolls into me on his right side, his right arm sliding under my shoulders, his left arm with the IV port drapes over my ribs, his head on my shoulder, his nose against my neck.  My left arm wraps around his head, cradling it, my fingers softly playing with his silvered locks.  I start another movie.  I feel him sag into sleep.  Part way through, I get a text from Castor asking if we need dinner.  I send him the snoring emoji and say thanks anyway.

I watch all of this movie.  James’ breathing is steady.  His fingers on my ribs twitch.  He’s probably writing a song in his sleep.  At least I hope that’s what he’s doing.  I smile and kiss his hairline.  The nurse comes in to check on James.  Seeing that he’s asleep, she takes what vitals she can without waking him.  She pulls the IV line from the port, taping the port in place.  Giving me the thumbs up, she departs the room, closing the door behind her.  My left fingers gently rub his scalp.  After starting another movie to kill the sounds of the hospital, I lay my right hand over his left arm draped over my ribs.  I don’t remember my eyes closing.

(pls share this survey)

Rockies Christmas - Day 6

Warnings:  Shameless product placement plugs, NSFW, Sex

James is shaking me awake.  “C’mon.  I hate to wake you, but it’s snowing hard.  We gotta go.”

I sit up in bed.  James has opened the drapes.  It’s very dark.  And it’s snowing.  Hard.  Tossing the blanket aside, I grab some clothes and get dressed on the toilet.  James stops and looks at me.  “You said hurry and I have to go.”

Nodding at me, “While that is killing two birds with one stone.”

Within a few minutes, we’re dressed, packed, shopping bags in hand and headed down to the lobby.  James checks us out while I go get the Shelby from the valet.  The valet parks it close to the door under the portico.  James gets the soft top up while I put everything into the trunk.  I get into the passenger seat, James climbs into the driver’s seat and heads towards the freeway.  At a stoplight, there’s a McDonald’s on the other side of the intersection.  He looks at me.  “We can eat at home” I say gently.

As the light changes, James looks ahead but runs his right hand up my thigh to my crotch, “Deal.”  I squeeze my thighs around his hand for a moment, then release it so he can drive as the roads are sloppy.

There are pockets of clear weather on the drive back.  James keeps to the posted speed limit under the messy conditions.  Even in the worst parts of low visibility, I am not nervous with his driving.  I’d been more nervous on the back of the ATV.  But then I’d never been on one before.  The weather clears more as we approach Vail.  I can sense James relaxing some.  But he still keeps to the posted speed limits.  Once we get onto our road, he sighs.  I just rest my hand on his bicep.  Pulling into the garage, James turns off the engine and hands me the keys.  “Thank you.”

Smiling at him, “Did you have fun?”

Leaning over the gearshift, he kisses me.  “Yes!”

“I’m glad.” 

He pats my thigh.  “You said we’d eat at home.”  He gives me a look.  “We’re home.”  His hand travels up my leg.

I shove it between my legs, “ok.”

Like civilized adults, we get out of the car, collect the items from the trunk, James closes the garage door.  Once inside, dumping all the bags just inside the door, we are like a pair of teenagers running into our bedroom.  Clothes flying in every direction.  Arms snaking around each other.  Lips kissing whatever they connect with.  Ending up on the bed – almost – he’s pushing my legs apart to get at my cunt.  His tongue works its devilish magic on me.  Before I can completely recover, he’s flipping me over and pulling my hips up his thighs.  He’s not rough, but not exactly tender either, in seeking his release.  We collapse into a heap just as the sunrise peeps into the windows.  The clouds quickly cover it up.  Sleep quickly covers us both.

I stretch in his arms.  It’s 10 am.  Wrapping my arms around his head – which is buried between my tits – I kiss his forehead.  He stretches, squeezing me in the process.  “Morning.”  I kiss his hair.

Stretching again, “Mawhrning” he mumbles into my boobs.

Kissing his hair again, “What do you want for breakfast?”  He humps his hips into my leg.  I just giggle.  His stomach rumbles.  “I heard that.”  I can feel him smile into my breasts.  He looks up from my chest giving me his big blue puppy eyes.  “Breakfast sandwich.”  His eyes get sad, and I can feel his lips pout.  “Burritos?”  His eyes brighten and he wiggles his butt.  I laugh as he kisses my tits.  “Well, if you want burritos, I need to get out of bed.”

“Fawine” he mumbles from my boobs.  Then his lips are covering mine with tender kisses.

Climbing out of the very messy bed, I collect the clothes on my side.  He actually tidies up the covers.  Gathering the rest of the clothes tossed all over our room, I dump them into the dirties hamper.  Pulling out a pair of jeans and a sweater, I head into the bathroom.  Again, I get dressed sitting on the toilet.

“How did I not know you do that?”

“Do what?” I ask while wiping.

“Get dressed on the toilet.

“Saves time.  I realized in college that I could sleep in another five minutes by getting dressed on the toilet.”  I wash my hands.

His face scrunches up a minute.  “Ok.”  Then he looks at me, “As long as you clean up after.”

“Always.”  I kiss his chin.

Making my way into the kitchen, James follows me.  He turns on the tree lights and opens all the drapes.  Then he turns on the Christmas music.  As I’m scrambling the eggs, he checks the water in the tree.  What happens next is like a ballet in the kitchen.  I hand him the syrup as he puts the tree pitcher in the sink.  I pull out the shredded cheese as he grabs a towel.  I reach for the saltshaker, and he smacks my ass before grabbing the pitcher and heading to the tree.  He turns on the fireplace after watering the tree.  I finish the burritos as he’s putting the pitcher away.  Handing him his plate, he grabs my neck and plants a kiss on me.  I follow him with my plate into the living room.  It’s snowing lightly out the windows.

“I hope this holds off until the kids get here tomorrow” James says quietly looking out at the snow lightly falling.

“Which airport are they coming into?”

“Eagle county.”

“At least that’s a shorter drive.”

“Yeah.  I rented them a van.”

“You’re worried.”

He looks at me with a soft smile.  “I trust them.”  He looks out the window, “I don’t trust the world with them.”  I lean over and kiss his cheek.  Collecting his plate, I take them to the kitchen.  It takes a little bit to unload the dishwasher and reload it.  In returning to the living room, James is working on the outside light strings.  Between the two of us, we get them out the patio door and hung on the balcony railing.  After brushing off the snow coming in the patio door, I take more of the empty bins back to the storage area.  I had to start stacking some that probably came in from the garage.  Pulling from another bin, I find a wreath.  James finds the door hanger and puts it up on the front door.  I find some holiday soap dispensers.  Filling them from the bottle under the kitchen sink, I distribute them to the bathrooms around the house.  James is standing in the middle of the living room staring at the fireplace.

“You ok?”

“Yeah.  I just can’t remember where the wreath is that hangs there” he points to the chimney. 

I pause a moment.  “There’s a large flat red bin over your workbench.”

He spins to me, “That’s it!”  He plants a kiss on me and almost skips to the door.

Digging through the last few bins, I find some candle holders.  There’s actually quite a few.  I put a pair on the kitchen table.  I’m holding the others when James returns with a huge wreath made of poinsettias that look real.  “Will you please help with this?”

“Sure.”  I set the candle holders on the table.  “What do you need?”

“Will you please move the step ladder in front of the fireplace?”

As I position the ladder, “Should I turn it off?”

Shaking his head, “I won’t be up here that long.”  He reaches up and finds the hanger in the stone.  The wreath is gorgeous.  Climbing back down, he folds up the step ladder, he puts it by the door leading to the storage room.  His eyebrows knit together again, “Tree skirt and stockings.”

Shifting the bins left in the living room, “Some of these haven’t been opened yet.”

We both dive in.  I find the stocking holders.  James finds the tree skirt and stockings.  He’s looking a little concerned.

“What’s wrong?”

“You don’t have one” as he fondles the stockings in his hands.

“Hang on a sec.”  I go to the shopping bags left by the garage door.  I find the one I want and return to the living room, “Here.”  I hand him a stocking.  It’s covered in books, pens, pine boughs, and gold stars.

His eyes soften, “That’s perfect for you!”  He puts the hangers on the mantle and hangs the stockings.  “There.”  Turning, he collects the candle holders, “These go here.”  Following him to the dining table, he spreads them around the table.  “There.”  He wraps an arm around my shoulders, “What’s next?”

“Need to get the last of the bins downstairs and wrap up what we bought yesterday.”

“I’ll get the bins if you’ll wrap.”  He looks at me, “Please.”

I squeeze him, “Of course.”

I go to the shopping bags.  James’ hand pops around me, “I’ll do this one” he kisses my shoulder grinning.  I pat his ass as he leaves.  Taking all the shopping bags to the room that I’d made into my office, I set them on the floor.  Returning to the storage room, I dig out the long bin that holds the wrapping paper.  I also manhandle the smaller bin filled with bows at the same time.  It takes me a couple of hours to get things wrapped up.  I put tags on my gifts.  On the bottom of the gifts from James, I stick post its of its contents along with a gift tag.  It takes me a couple of trips between my office and the tree to get everything under the tree.  I set James’ gifts on the table.  The bins have all been removed from the living room, but James is nowhere to be seen.  His guitar comes screaming from his studio.  I just smile and head into the kitchen.  I spend the next couple of hours baking up some of my favorite sugar cookies.  Digging into the pantry I find storage tubs for what I’ve made.  I also dig out some serving platters, give them a wash and set them on the dining room table.  Grabbing my phone from my purse, I look up a frosting recipe.  The only thing I need is food coloring.  Pulling out the step stool from the pantry, I start digging through all the kitchen cabinets and shelves in the pantry.

“What are you doing?”  I jump slightly.  He puts his hands on my hips as I climb down the step stool, “Sorry.”

“I was looking for food coloring.”

“If there’s any here, it’s going to be really old.”  He folds up the stool and leans it up against shelves in the pantry.  “What do you want it for?”

“Decorating those” I point to all the sugar cookies sitting on the kitchen table.

“My little steam engine!  You have been busy!”

“It’s fun!”

“But I don’t have cookie cutters.”

“I bought some yesterday.  Nothing fancy.”

He wraps me into his arms, kissing me.  “My talented little steam engine!”  Another deep kiss.  “We still have to pick up the roast tomorrow.  We can grab food coloring then.”

I squeeze him, “That will work.”

“What do you want for luner?”

My eyebrows meet my hairline, “What?”

“Lunch.  Dinner.  Luner.”  A smile replaces the question, “What do you want?”

His hands rest on my hips, “Well, I’m thinking about doing pulled pork for tomorrow.  There’s the roast on Christmas.  How about brats?”

“Only if you grill onions with them.”

“That’s a federal offense to NOT grill onions with brats” he deadpans.  Then a huge smile spreads across his face.

“Is there anything I can do to help with luner?”

Easing his grip on me, “Don’t think so.”

“Then I’ll get the last of the bins downstairs.”

He pulls me back, kissing me.  “Thank you.”

I caress his cheek, “You’re welcome.”  He again releases his hold on my hips.  As I pass the table, “Oh.  These are your gifts to the kids.  There’s name tags on them and post its on the bottom of each with the contents.”

“Perfect.  I’ll finish those up.”  He pulls out a couple of onions and starts slicing.

There were only a couple of bins left that I shift to the big storage room.  By the time I get back to the kitchen, James has the brats going in a cast iron skillet.  I stand and watch him.  His eyes bright as he’s cooking.  He looks at me smiling, his eyes deepen in color.  In a short time, he’s got our luner plated and handing me one.  The cheddar brats are smothered in grilled onions and kidney beans on the side.  Again, we sat in the living room to eat.  I couldn’t finish and set my plate on the coffee table.  I lean into his shoulder.

“Hey.  C’mon sleepy head” he’s laughing gently at me.

“I’m sorry.  I didn’t mean to fall asleep.”

“Well, it’s been a long day.  We did leave Denver at 5:30 this morning.”

Yawning, “Wah timawh is it now?”

“Bedtime.”  He pulls me off the sofa then collects his plate.  I gather up mine.  James closes all the drapes while I finish loading the dishwasher.  He sets his on the counter before turning off the Christmas tree lights.  I put his dishes into the dishwasher, toss in the soap pod and start it.  Holding out a hand to me, James gently guides me to our bedroom.

The covers are barely draped over both of us before we are asleep.

Rockies Christmas - Day 10

Warnings: Some angst, Hospital stay, Shameless product placement

Guide: CBF = Cali’s Boyfriend / CGF = Castor’s Girlfriend / MBF = Marcella’s Boyfriend {I didn’t want to give them names}

A hand on my shoulder is gently shaking me, “Kira.”  It’s a hand much smaller than James’.  “Kira.”

I roll over scrubbing my eyes, “mmmyeah.”  I look up and there stands Cali.

“It’s six fifteen.  Thought you’d like some breakfast before going to see Dad.”

Yesterday slams into my brain.  “Thanks.  I’ll be out in a minute.”  She nods, smiling softly, and closes the door on her way out.  I swim to the side of the massive bed.  Scrubbing my eyes again, I get up and go to the bathroom.  After flushing, I wash my hands and splash water on my face.  I change clothes quickly back into what I’d worn yesterday.  Returning to the bedroom, I pull out my brush, do a quick raking on my hair and bun it up again as I open the door.

Timothy is there with a couple large bags from McDonald’s.  I just huff a smile.  Cali comes up to me, “We may have ordered too much.”  There’s concern in her eyes.

“We’ll leave a note for the cleaning staff.  They’ll appreciate it” I console her.  Finding an Egg McMuffin, I pull out a chair and sit.

“What do you want to drink?” Cali asks.

“Oh wait!” Timothy speaks up.  “Jordan told me.  Here.”  He hands me a SB cup.

I chug part of it.  “Bless you both!”  I hear a phone ringing in my room.  I quickly find that it’s mine.  “Hi Lars.”  I walk back out to the table.

“Hey.  How you holding up?”

Sighing, “I’ve been better.  Sorry for the crappy Birthday present yesterday.”

“Hey, that wasn’t on you!” Lars laughs.  “I just talked to him.  He sounds tired but good.”

“Who can sleep good in a hospital?”  I hear the Dane laugh.  “We’re just getting ready to go see him.”  Cali is bouncing, “Hey Lars, Cali wants to talk to you.”

“Put her on.”

“Hi Onkel Lars!” as she hits speaker.  “Is Auntie Jess there too?”

“Yeah, so are the boys.”  A chorus of Hi’s from the background.

“Uhm.  You’re going to be Store Onkel Lars.”

“Say what?” Lars’ voice says.

“Onkel Lars, I’m pregnant.”

“You’re making James … a Grandfather?!” there is happy cheering in the background.

The room on this side of the pond erupts in laughter.  “Yes.”

“Well, it’s about time one of you did!” he laughs.  “I’m … we’re very happy for you!!”

Cali hands the phone back to me.  I take it off speaker.  “Hey Lars.”

“Hey.  Tell that lunkhead to stop showboating.”

“The kids say that he wasn’t showboating.”

“Please tell me he was wearing a helmet.”

“Yes.”

“Thank god.”  I hear him chew on his toothpick.  “Ok, Jess is excited, she wants to go baby shopping for Cali.”

“Hey, I really hope that you did have a good day yesterday.”

I can almost see him nodding, “I did.  Until that lunkhead of yours took a spill!  But I’m grateful he’s going to be ok.”

“Oh!  So now he’s my lunkhead!”

“This time yes!” Lars laughs.

“I don’t know if the others know.”

“I’ll call them.  Kira, it’s all good.”

“Thanks Lars.  I’ll keep you posted.”

“Please do.  Farvel!”  He ends the call.

I chug more of my coffee and finish the sandwich.

Castor stands up and starts clearing away the garbage.  “Let’s get this show on the road.”

Cali finds a pen and paper and leaves a note for the cleaning staff.

I look up the number for the car service.  “The van will be downstairs in ten.”  That put a hustle in everyone.  Shirts are changed, coats grabbed, last bites of breakfast taken, shoes found and put on feet.  Grabbing both phones, my wallet and my jacket along with a key card, we all pile into the elevator.  Shortly after we get to the lobby the van arrives.  Same driver as the night before.  Piling in, I watch the Christmas decorations go by on the drive to the hospital.  The same ones that I’d been happy to see just a few days ago with James at my side.  Getting to the hospital, I lead the way to the nurses’ station.  After getting his room number, we make our way to the floor.  The elevator doors open and there stands the doctor.

“Wow, you are punctual” he smiles.  “He’s actually awake.  But please, don’t over tax him.”  Motioning with his hand, “This way.”  As we get to the door, he puts a hand on my arm as the kids all enter the room, “This might be a little much for him.”

“I’ll kick them out soon, but I’m not going to deny him his kids.”

The doctor nods as he walks away.

I enter the room.  There’s one IV bag hung and a heart monitor beeping.  The kids have all taken up space around the bed.  I can’t see him.  I can hear him.  Lars was right.  James sounds exhausted.  I wait patiently.  They are chattering about the hotel suite.  The helicopter ride.  That the other machines got back home ok.

“Is Kira here?” comes James’ voice.  Castor looks over his shoulder at me.  He steps aside.  James is pale but alive.  He looks like he’s been in the boxing ring with George Foreman.  The whole left side of his face is bruised.  That eye a little swollen.  He’s holding a cold pack in his right hand which looks a little puffy.  But those eyes.  Those big glacier blue eyes.  They are perfect.

“I’m here.”  He smiles and reaches out for my hand.  I take his left hand with my right.

Cali speaks up, “Hey, let’s go do some after Christmas sales shopping.”

“Then maybe hit up a movie” Marcella pitches in.

They all bid us goodbye and tumble out the door.  Then it’s quiet and just us.

“Hey” he says, his eyelids dropping.

“Hey.”

He tugs me, “Come here.”

I climb into bed beside him, making sure that all the tubes and wires are not being pinched, and stretch out beside him, my head cradled on his left shoulder.  His hand rests on my hip.

He looks at me, “I’m sorry.”

I press my fingers to his lips, “You didn’t do anything wrong.  The kids have assured everyone that you were not showboating.”  He barely shakes his head.  “I’m just grateful that you were wearing your helmet.”

“That bad?”

I lift my head up, “James.  It’s split in two.”

He sniffs out a smile, “Explains why my head hurts.”

I caress his chin, “Sleep.”

He snugs me in closer to him, “Ok.”

My eyes close shortly after his.

I hear the nurses coming in and checking monitors.  I hear other machines beeping down the hallway.  I hear his heartbeat in my ear.  I feel his hand resting on my hip.  I say a prayer and thank those in the great upstairs for watching over him.  I feel the tear leak from my closed eye warm my cheek before warming the hospital gown covering James.  I have no idea what time it is when my eyes finally crack open.  James’ hand is playing with my fingers resting on his chest.  I rock my head back.  His eyes slit open.  “Hey.”  I smile up at him.

“This bed sucks.”

I pat his chest, “Most hospital beds do.”  I wiggle a little.  He winces.  “I’m not hurting you, am I?”

“Right now, everything hurts.”  He tightens his arm around my back.  “But, I do gotta piss.”

Snorfelling at him, I detangle myself from him, the wires, tubing and slide from the bed. 

A nurse walks in, “Ah.  You’re awake.”

“And I gotta piss.”

“Here, let me pop these off.  That will make it easier.”  She pops off all the heart monitor leads. 

He swings his legs off the bed, the sheet still wrapped around his legs and slowly stands.  Then sits quickly grabbing his left knee with a wince.  I lift his gown.  His left leg from mid shin to almost waist is black and blue.

“I think I know where the snowmobile landed on me” he grimaces.

The nurse hands over a plastic urinal bottle, “Use this right now.  I need to get your doctor in here.”

I help James get lined up in the bottle.  His head leans onto my shoulder.  I hear his pee hitting the plastic container.  He heaves a sigh.

“Better?”

“mmmmhmmm.”  He’s still leaning into me.  I lift his gown and remove the urinal.  Closing its lid, I set it on the floor.  Then I help him shift back into the bed.  I move the urinal into the bathroom by the toilet and wash my hands.

The doctor comes in the room as I exit the bathroom.  The doctor flips back the covers and hoists the hospital gown.  James’ left leg, hip and part of his torso look like a Jackson Pollock painting done in blues, purples and flesh tones.  The doctor runs his hands over the area watching James’ face.  “I know that you were seriously burned, but don’t let that pain tolerance hide if these hurt” the doctors’ words are kind.

“It hurts” is all James says.

“I don’t really want to give you a narcotic pain med.”  He pulls the covers back over James’ body.  The nurse reattaches the leads.

“Please don’t.”

“Okay.  I’m going to give you a high dose of naproxen.  But to do that, you’ll need to stay another night.”

James just nods.

“I would highly recommend that you” he looks at me, “sleep on his other side.”

“Alright.”

He writes up the order and hands it to the nurse.  As he walks out, “You both should have a sleep study done.”

We both just look at each other.  He looks at me.  “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“For being a pain.”

“Turn around is fair game.”  He looks at me.  “Halloween?” I grin.

“Yeah, but you didn’t end up in the hospital.”

“True.  But I didn’t have a five hundred pound snowmobile land on me.”

“Seven hundred, but I concede the point.”  I look at him.

“What?  Dad concedes a point?” Castor says coming in the door grinning.  The other kids follow in.

They start talking about the bargains they’d found.  The movie that they went to see.

“Hey Dad” Marcella pipes up.  “We brought you two a late lunch.”

“Oh yeah” CGF pulls out a bag from her backpack.  The smell fills the room.  MBF closes the door.

“I know that Dad wants the meatball sub,” Cali says.  “I hope you’ll like the turkey one.”

“Thank you.”  I take the offered sandwich.  “This is huge!”

“Castor will finish whatever you don’t” says CGF.  “And something to wash them down.”  She pulls out a pair of Severed Lime cans.

James almost inhales his sub.  “Gee Dad, you weren’t hungry at all!” Castor teases him.

“Nope.”  James lets out a huge burp.  “Not at all.”  I smile at him as he looks at me.

The nurse comes in with a new IV bag loaded with the pain meds.  “Oh good, you’ve eaten.  This med might have upset your stomach without food.”  She quickly changes out the bags.  “Uhm, where is the…?” she looks at me.  I point to the bathroom.  “Thanks.  I’ll collect it later.”  She walks to the door, “Those really smell good!” as she leaves.

“You kids aren’t eating” James says.

“We ate there” MBF says.  “We thought that you two might be hungry and hospital food is horrid.”

“Yes, it is.  Almost as bad as the beds.”  James tries to shift some and winces.

“You need to move up the bed?” I ask.  He just nods.  “Castor, MBF will you two please help?  Grab under the arms.  Now.”  They pull James a good six inches up on the mattress while I hold the bottom sheet from sliding with him.  His eyes close for a minute.  I rest my hand on his chest.  He rests his hand over mine and opens his eyes.  I can tell he’s ready to drift back to sleep.

CGF speaks up, “I think we need to let him rest.”  She wraps an arm around Castor’s waist, “C’mon.”

Cali whispers to me, “You staying?”  I just nod.  Cali smiles at me, then leans over and kisses her Dad on the cheek.  “See ya later – Grandpa!”

He smiles and his eyes brighten some, “See you later little Mama.”

As the kids file out, I hand Castor the rest of my sub.  He smiles at me, his eyes lighting up.  Damn.  He has his Daddy’s eyes.

Once the door is closed, James pats the bed on his right side.  I climb in, again making sure that I’m not on any wires or tubes.  His hand curls around my head, playing with my bun.  I reach up and pull off the hair tie.  His fingers snarl into my hair, caressing my scalp.  Those fingers in my hair slow.  Then stop.  I grab the TV controller and start a long movie.  The nurse comes in a couple of times to check the IV flow.  She also collects the full – and leaves an empty – plastic urinal bottle.  She smiles at me each time.  The movie ends and I start another.  James shifts some in his sleep, groaning softly.  The next time the nurse comes in, I ask her quietly about using arnica oil on James.  She lifts her eyebrows and just as quietly says that she’ll ask his doctor.  About an hour later she comes back with a bottle and a towel.  She hands me the bottle and lays the towel over my hip.  “I guess you know how to use this.”  I just nod.  Memories of various aftermaths of being in bed with James flow through my brain.  I gently work the oil into the bruises on his body.  I can’t quite reach his leg, but the worst part on his hip and torso I am able to rub the oil in.  Again, I start another movie.  It’s getting dark out.  The nurse comes in again, this time changing the IV bags.  James shifts in his sleep while she’s there.  He again moans softly.  She pulls up his chart on the computer and makes notes.  She smiles at me as she leaves the room.  I hear my phone buzz.  It’s Cali.  She’s asking for an update on James.  I send her the snoring emoji.  She replies with a thumbs up.  About eleven, James wakes.  Sorta.

“I gotta piss.”

“Hang on.”  I climb out of bed, grab the urinal and put in place.  “Let ‘er rip” I say. 

He smiles at me, “I could get used to this.”

As he finishes, I cap the bottle, “Yeah, I don’t think so.”  I put the bottle in the bathroom, wash my hands and climb back in bed.  He’s already half asleep.

“Thanks for staying with me” he mumbles.

“I wouldn’t have it any other way” I kiss his chin.

His grin slowly slips as he surrenders to sleep again.  I curl up against him.  The nurse comes in again to check the IV.  She leaves and returns with a blanket for me.  “See you tomorrow” she says kindly before leaving the room.  I pull the blanket up over me, my head on his chest, my eyes close.

James and his spirit animal??

Faithfully

Warnings: Tissues might be needed. I needed a reason to have a good cry. Also discovered it's hard to type when you can't see the keyboard.....

I remember the first time I saw her.  Well, I heard her first.  Me and Lars had gone out to dinner.  As we walked back to our cars, we passed a small dive bar.  The voice that came floating out the door intoxicated me.  I stopped dead in my tracks.  Lars, still yabbering away, plowed into me.  Almost in a trance, I walked into the bar.  She was standing on the small basement stage with four other musicians.  I found a table in the back and sat, barely aware that Lars had followed me.  No one noticed we’d entered the place.  She finished singing Dreams by Fleetwood Mac.  The crowd applauded.

“Y’all liked that one?” she giggled.  The crowd yelled their appreciation.  “What do you want to hear next?”

“The Boxer!”   “Nothing Else!”  “Sound of Silence!”  “Faithfully!”

“Hey! Hey! Hey!  You know I don’t do Metallica!” she laughed, pointing to the guy who’d called out my own song, before turning to get a drink “Well, not in San Fran anyway!"  There was laughter in the crowd.  “Let’s end the night on a high note” she laughed with the band.  They launched into Faithfully by Journey.  Again, I was entranced.  That last note I thought she’d never let it end.  It floated in the air effortlessly.  The crowd happily cheered them.  Her.  I turned to Lars “Damn!  She’s good!”

“Are you thinking with your head or your brains?” the little Dane snarked with a laugh at me.

Laughing slightly, “Probably both!”

Me and Lars left the place as the house lights came on.  Over the next couple of weeks, I saw her perform as many times as I could.  I would always sneak in after they had started performing.  Not once was I recognized.  Well, the barkeep recognized me, but kept his mouth shut and even helped get me in and out without too much hoopla.  A couple of times, I sat on the backbar to watch.  Her.  The barkeep was the one who told me that she was single.  And her name.  Y/N.  That name struck a chord in my heart.  Y/N was a natural on the stage.  Every night, she would turn down the request to sing any Metallica song. 

One night as I tried to sneak out the back, I plowed into Y/N.  Literally.  I parked her on her ass.

“oohff” escaped her as she landed on the floor.

“Oh man!  I’m super sorry!”  I pulled her to her feet “You ok?”

Rubbing her butt, “Yeah.”  Then she grinned “It’s all good.  You ok?  I kinda mowed into you a little hard there.”

“Yeah, I’m good.”  I could see that she was blushing.  I think I was too.  “You sounded good tonight.”

Y/N looked down at her hands for a second, then back up at me “Just tonight?” she said softly.

“You noticed?”

A huge smirk plastered on her face “You are kinda recognizable.”  She crinkled her nose a little “And kinda tall.”

“Yeah, that has been a problem over the years.”  She giggled.  “Can I take you out to dinner?” I asked feeling like a teenager.

Shrugging her shoulders slightly, “Sure.  Not sure what’s open at 2am, but sure!”

We ended up at a Taco Bell.

The first time I kissed Y/N it was like we were both zapped by static electricity.  What was supposed to be just a kiss quickly became something much more.  Ok.  We ended up in bed.

We started dating.  Seriously dating.  I had her at my side as much as possible.  The age difference – she’s 8 years younger than me – doesn’t bother me.  Y/N claims that it doesn’t bother her either.  The height difference – I’m 6 foot 1, she’s 5 foot 2 – quickly became a constant joke between us.  Well, everyone.  She’s even shorter than Lars!

A month later, I asked Y/N to move in with me.  “You know what’s going to be said about that, don’t you?” she grimaced slightly.

“What?” as I wrapped my arms around her.

“That I’m mooching off you” she put her hands on my chest.

“You’re a better singer than I am” I caressed her hair.

“That’s debatable” she sighed out.

Turns out, we both suffer from serious performance anxiety.  We both manage to cover it up pretty good once we get on stage.  Getting us there can be another story.

One night, while cuddling in bed – after we’d fucked each other silly – I finally asked, “Why won’t you sing Metallica songs?”

“I don’t have the voice for it” Y/N stated simply.  “I don’t have the power.  I’d love to be able to sing the heavy songs, but my voice just lacks … something.”

“I think you’d do a great version of Nothing” I smiled at her.

“Maybe” she grinned.

I took her camping that weekend.  We ended up spending most of the weekend in the tent as it poured down rain.  If memory serves me right, neither of us could walk straight as we packed up the truck, giggling the whole time.

Y/N walked slowly out of the bathroom one morning about two months after the hiking trip.  Her face pale.  Her hands shaking.  The pregnancy test stick wobbling in her hands.  “James” her voice shook.  I just pulled her into my lap.  “We were so careful” she whispered.

Seeing the pink plus sign on the tester, “I know” I kissed her forehead.  “One must have broken.”  I rocked Y/N in my arms a moment.

“James?”

“Yeah?”

“Stop rocking me.”

“What?”

“I’m nauseous enough.  Please stop rocking me.”

“Oh god” I stopped rocking.  But snugged her tighter to me “Sorry.”

“I’m so old” she whimpered.

I kissed her forehead.  “I know this won’t be easy.”  I kissed her forehead again.  “We need to get you the best baby doctor.”

Wrapping her arms around my neck, “They are called OBGYN.”

I held her tighter, “I got you.”

Within days, I’d found her the best one in the city.  Ok.  Avi found the OBGYN.  The doctor called it a Late In Life pregnancy.  And it would not be easy.  And that we should consider all the options.  ALL the options.  Y/N quickly batted down the hardest idea immediately.  “No.  If we aren’t supposed to become parents, then the Fates would not have let this happen.  I’m not going to throw it away.”

“Ok.  I got you.”

“I know that you already have kids.”  The worry plain on Y/N’s face.

“I do.  But, I’m willing to move forward with this.”  I put my hand on her belly, “If you are.”  Y/N just nodded and snuggled up closer to me.  I held her tightly.

During one of the baby doctor visits, a sonogram was performed.  We were both excited to see our baby.  Then Y/N’s face paled “Doc?”

“Yes Y/N?” she smiled.

“What’s that?” Y/N pointed to a small bulge on the side of the image.

Moving the wand, “Well look at that!” the doctor smiled.  “Twins!”

I just looked at Y/N.  With a look of total panic etched on her face “Twins?” she whispered.

“We’ll manage” I whispered into her hair.

She nuzzled into my neck “mmk.”  Then sighing “I will need to stop performing.”

I looked into her eyes “Why?”

Smiling “That’s one less stress in my life.”

I huffed out a laugh “That’s true!”

Then we heard the heart beats.  Two little washing machines swishing away.  The doctor gave us prints of the sonogram.  I stuck one on my mic stand in my vocal booth at HQ.  Y/N put one on the fridge at home.

The following weekend, Y/N put on her final performance.  Rubbing her growing belly the whole time!  Me, Lars, Kirk and Rob showed up.  Y/N even pointed us out.  When she announced that this would be her last performance, the crowd was shocked into silence.  Until she announced why.  The applause grew in the crowd.

“Ok.  So.  What should be my last song for y’all?” she smiled at the crowd, hand on her belly.

I had already schemed with the other three.  We yelled out “Nothing Else Matters!” louder than everybody else.

Y/N, leaning on the mic stand and holding her belly, laughed loudly.  “Well, only if you four dorks” pointing at us “get up here and join these four jerks!” she hiked her thumb over her shoulder at her bandmates.  Her band was behind her almost begging us to take the stage.  As we walked to the tiny little stage, the audience went nuts.  As part of my scheming, Avi had made certain that me, Kirk and Rob had guitars at the bar.  Lars was stuck with the drum set already there.  I stood behind Y/N as she sang my song.  Perfectly.  When done, Y/N took her bow.  We encouraged the crowd to keep applauding her.  Turning around, she saw what that eight of us behind her were doing and she smacked my bicep.  Hard.  But laughing.  Flipping my guitar to my back, I grabbed Y/N and planted a deep kiss on her.  Right there.  On that tiny little basement stage.  I heard the crowd go quiet.  Then they burst out cheering.  From behind the drumset, Lars yelled “Get a room!”

Kirk chimed in “They already did!”

The place busts out in laughter.  I eased us out of the kiss, smiling at her.  She wrinkled her nose at me, then rested her head on my chest. 

The four of us pushed Y/N and her band to front of the stage to take their well deserved bows.  When the house lights came on, I handed off my guitar to Chad and took Y/N’s hand leading her off the stage.  I again kissed her, my hand resting on her belly.  Her hand covered mine as her other arm wrapped around my waist.  I almost carried her out to my truck.

Y/N made me call my grown kids to tell them the news.  “They don’t need to find out from the gossip rags.”

Over the following months, Y/N began having some serious medical issues.  The doctor put her in the hospital.  With two months to go.  It almost drove her nuts with the restrictions they had on her.  They actually counted the number of steps she could take in 24 hours.  I stayed with her, trying to keep her spirits up.  I’d sit in her room and play guitar.  I wrote several songs there.

As baby delivery time got closer, Y/N was – at times – exceedingly uncomfortable.  I would sit on her bed rubbing her belly.  Or her back.  Or her cramping feet.

One night Y/N woke me up, smacking me hard.  “James!”  I bolted upright.  “James!” she was panting hard.  The stupid call button had fallen off the bed.  I hit the button as I held Y/N.  She clutched my wrist, eyes wide in both pain and fear.  “It’s too soon” she almost begged me.

The door crashed open with all the night nurses entering the room.  Within minutes, Y/N was being pushed to delivery with me running behind the bed.  I held her hand as the contractions quickly became strong.  The doctor was soon there too.  Concerned over all three heartbeats, natural delivery quickly became a Cesarean.  A barrier was lifted over Y/N’s midsection.  The nurses let me get up by Y/N’s head.  I wrapped my hands around her head and the back of her neck, my lips right beside her ear.  She rested her forehead on my cheek.  Her fingers clutched at my wrists.

Our first child – a son – was laid on her chest.  Screaming.  Y/N started giggling hard “He’s a Hetfield!”  Our second child – a daughter – was also laid on Y/N’s chest.  We both rested our hands on the naked little beings.  Our kids.  Y/N started crying softly.  I joined her, kissing her temple.  Once the stitches on Y/N’s belly had been done, the doctor checked out the kids.  Both were a little underweight, but acceptable for twins.  Then we are told that our son was born on the 6th.  Our daughter on the 7th.  Even though they were born only 4 minutes apart.  Y/N giggled softly leaning her head into my arm, “At least they get their own birthdays!”  I joined in the giggling.

The kids were taken to the nursery for a full check out as they wheeled Y/N back to her room.  The lead night nurse leaves a couple of clipboards on the bedtable, “You’ll need to get these filled out soon.  Please.”

“Can those wait till morning?  Y/N really needs some sleep” as I watch Y/N fight to keep her eyes open.

“Sure” the nurse smiled before leaving the room.

I stretch out on my side next to Y/N.  She leans into me.  I gently rub her eyebrows “Sleep.”  I feel her body sag into sleep a few moments later.  I lay there gently rubbing her eyebrows, letting my fingers glide over her forehead, down her cheeks, over her lips softly.  She snorfels softly in her sleep, nuzzling deeper into my chest.  My hand naturally went to rest on her belly.  I almost smacked her as the large baby bump was gone.  I leaned my head on hers.

The blinding sun shining in the window woke me.  I stretch slightly as I am still cradling Y/N.  The mother of my twins.  Heaving a sigh, I kiss her forehead.  I detangle myself to go use the bathroom.  When I exit, I pick up the clipboards.  One for our son.  One for our daughter.  Their names blank.  Our names had been printed out as the parents.  I look at the woman sleeping in the hospital bed in front of me.  My heart is not sure if it wants to break or is so full it’s breaking.  I have three grown kids.  It hits me that I am going to be in my early 80’s when these two graduate high school.  Heaving a sigh, I reclaim my spot next to Y/N.  She snorfels awake.

“hey” she whispers.

“Hey” I kiss her forehead “Mom.”

She starts to snicker, then reaches for her stomach.  “Stitches.”  Looking up at me, she kisses my chin “Morning Dad.”  She snickers again, “But then you are used to being called that.”

I nod, “I am.  But it’s always special to hear it.”

There’s a soft knock on the room door.  “Come” I call out.

It takes two nurses to wheel in the basinets with our kids.  They are being a little fussy.  I push the button to raise the head of Y/N’s bed.  One of the nurses hands Y/N our son.  “They might be a little hungry.”

Y/N blushes some “I think the diner is open” as she looks at the wet spots forming on the front of her hospital gown. 

Smiling “Can I show you?” I ask her.  Y/N gently smiles at me blushing even more.  I gently pull open the front of the hospital gown.  Cupping our sons’ head, I guide his little mouth to her wet nipple.  He latches on almost immediately.  I take Y/N’s hand and guide it to the back of our son’s head, holding it so he can happily feed.

“You’ve had kids?” the first nurse looks at me.

“Three” I smile back at her.

“Then, I will leave you to it” the first nurse grins as the two leave the room. 

I collect our fussing daughter and pace with her until our son is done.  “Here” I smile as we trade kids.  I pace the room more, gently patting our son on the back.  The small bundle lets out a massive belch.

“Like father like son!” Y/N snarks softly at me.  I chuckle softly.

Again, we trade off kids.  I pace the room burping our daughter.  She lets out a smaller belch.  We both snicker.  I put our daughter into the bassinette.  As I go to lay our son into the other, they start fussing again.  I look at Y/N and she just nods smiling.  Shifting our daughter a little, I put our son down next to his sister.  It seems that both kids sigh before drifting off to sleep.  I push the empty bassinette into a corner of the room and push the loaded one close to the bed.  I collect the clipboards and retake my spot next to Y/N.

“So.  What are we going to name our kids?”

Heaving a sigh “I was thinking ….” her voice trails off.

“Yes?” I kiss her forehead.

“For our son, Forest.  For our daughter Ivy.”

Nodding, “I like those.”  I kiss her forehead again.  “How about middle names?”

“I don’t know.”  She looks at me “Tents?”  We both bust out laughing as Y/N holds her stitches.

Our son is named Forest Cliffton.  His middle name a combination of Y/N’s dad’s name – Milton.  And Cliff.

Our daughter is named Ivy Elizabeth.

Y/N and the kids have to spend at least a week in the hospital.  But the whole crew – including wives, girlfriends and partners – from HQ drop by to meet the newest editions to the immediate family.  Both Lars and Kirk show up to help shift Y/N and the kids home.  Rob, Chloe and Jess have evidently already been to the house as it’s been cleaned up.  Groceries are in the fridge.  Sheets have been changed.  Garbage taken out.  There are several premade dishes in the fridge for us. 

Just getting Y/N into the house and tucked into the sofa has exhausted her.  The kids are happily asleep in their car seats.  I let them sleep there.  We all sit around the living room talking about our kids.  Kirk’s youngest is just a couple of years old.  All four of us have kids in their teens or older.  I get calls from my older kids wanting to know how their younger siblings are.  I send them photos of Forest and Ivy in their car seats.

It seems like it’s just been days since the twins came home.  But they are beginning to teeth.  I hear Y/N whimper and watch her wince while feeding Forest.

“Stop biting Mama, you little milk vampire!” she chuckles gently at our son.

“That bad?” I grin at her as I hand off Ivy and collect Forest.

“You have been gentler to my boobs than your son!” she grins as she positions Ivy.  “Ouch!”  Y/N shifts Ivy a little “A second little milk vampire!”  I reach down, wipe off Y/N’s other boob and lick off the seepage from my hand.  “Cleaning up after your son, hmm?” she snarks softly at me.  I just nod at her smiling face just before she winces again.  “That’s it.  You two are getting weaned!”  Wiggling my eyebrows at her, I chuckle.  “And if you use what I’ve pumped in the fridge for your coffee again, you’re going to be in trouble!” 

I just chuckle as I walk with Forest into the living room, burping him.  He finally rips a loud one.  Into my ear.  “Yeah, I probably deserved that one!”  Hoisting my son a little higher in my arms, I set about making my coffee.  As I open the fridge, I consider the small bottles on the second shelf. 

“Don’t you dare!” Y/N snarks behind me.  “Literally taking the food from your children for your coffee!”  She’s carrying Ivy and adjusting her bra.  Ivy coos at her mother.  “I know you prefer it warm directly from the tap.  But you are cut off.”  She nuzzles the small face.  I grab them and smooch them both, making them both giggle along with Forest. 

“Well, if they are cut off ….” I reach for one of the small bottles.

Y/N smacks my hand “They are cut off from the tap.  Not the milk!” she laughs.

Several months later, we have returned to the studio.  It’s time to consider the AWMH Concert again.  I pull Y/N into my arms “C’mere.”  We snuggle for a minute.  “I had a thought on the way home.”

She strokes my hair “And what thought is that?” she smiles serenely at me.

“Would you consider singing a couple of songs at the AWHM show?”

She leans into my chest “Let me think on that.”

Three months later, Y/N and I finish the AWMH Concert with Nothing.  She did an amazing job.

Seven years later….

I’m in the studio with the others.  We are putting the final touches on a song for the new release.  Y/N had taken the kids shoe shopping.  It’s been an off day for me.  I can’t seem to get anything right.  I’m frustrated.  Even Lars is seeing that I’m having a hard time and leaves me alone. 

Avi walks into the studio, his face pale.  There’s a CHiP officer walking behind him.  “Avi?” my voice shakes.

“James.  There’s” he gulps, “been … an accident…”

“Where is Y/N and the twins?” I almost bark at him.  I’m barely aware that Chad is there pulling my guitar and in-ear monitors off me.  “Where?”

“Your children are bumped and bruised.  They are in San Fran General” the officer speaks up, taking a couple of steps closer to me.

“Y/N?”

The officer’s eyes are kind.  “She didn’t … make it.” 

I’m aware that there’s someone screaming as I sink to my knees.  Lars has almost knocked over his whole drum kit to get to me. That someone screaming is me.  Kirk and Rob are pulling me to my feet.  Lars slides me into the back seat of the officer’s car and sits next to me.  The officer takes us with lights flashing to the hospital.  Lars leads me through the hallways to a room.  The twins are there, sitting on the bed side-by-side.  When they see me, they collide with me.  I pull them in, squeezing them to me.  We sit there sobbing.

It takes me some time to calm.  The twins have cried themselves to sleep.  The officer has hung around.  “Please tell me what happened” I plead.

“It was a wrong way entry to the freeway in a stolen delivery van.  That van hit a sedan and both vehicles hit your truck head on.”  He’s wringing his hands.  “She didn’t suffer” he almost whispers.

I again break down sobbing.

Lars and Jess help me to plan Y/N’s funeral.  Ok.  Lars and Jess planned it.  I couldn’t.  The twins clung to me over those days.  I let them.

Over the next decade, the twins and I managed to muddle through.  We talk about Y/N all the time.  Her massive silver tabby cat – Mithril - would occasionally sit at the top of the stairs, staring at the ledge in the bend of the stairs.  There’s nothing there.  Y/N had always wanted to put a fake plant there.  But we never got one picked out.  I shiver every time I see her cat staring at the empty shelf.

“Ok you two!  School bus is leaving!” I yell up the stairs to the twins.

“Coming!”   “On it Dad!”

They come storming down the stairs, tugging on jackets, carrying backpacks, dodging the cat.

Seeing my backpack on the table, “Where are you going, Dad?” Ivy asks, her fingers grazing the straps of the pack.

“I thought I’d go glassing for bucks up on the ridge after dropping you two off” I grin at my youngest child.

Ivy’s dark eyes – her mother’s eyes – look at me “Please take your avalanche beacon” she whispers.

I frown slightly at my youngest daughter “Ok.  I’ll take it.”

She kisses my chin, “Thanks Dad.”

“Hey Dad, I’m going with Rudy after school to shoot some hoops.  Is that ok?”

“Sure Forest.  What time do you think you’ll be home?”

“Probably 4:30 or 5.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

“I’m supposed to go help Stacy with her English paper after school” Ivy speaks up.

“mmk.  Same question, Ivy.”

“4:30 or 5ish.”

“Deal.  Let’s roll out kiddos!” as I grab my wallet, backpack, phone and key fob.  As we walk through the garage, I grab my avalanche beacon and attach it to my backpack.  Ivy smiles at me.

After dropping them off, I head up into the hills to a trailhead that I’ve heard has been busy with elk this year.  I wander through the wilderness, spotting several big bucks.  I note where they are roaming.  Checking the time, I turn and start my way back.  As I’m navigating a trail by a ravine, I trip……

I snorfel awake.  Y/N is laying in the bed next to me, smiling gently at me.

“There they are!  Those stunning blue eyes” she purrs at me.

“Y/N?  How are you here with me?”  I rub my forehead, the remnant of a headache fading.

Her fingers are gently playing with my hair “James.  I am not … there ..with you.”  She heaves a sigh.  “You are ….here ..with me.”  I look into her eyes completely confused.  “What’s the last thing you remember?” she smiles softly at me, her hand planted on my chest.

“I’d been out on the ridge glassing…” the images dancing in my head.  “I was walking …. back to the truck.  I tripped….”  She just nods gently with a wonky smile.  “I’m …?”

She nods.  “You didn’t trip.  The lip of the ravine collapsed.  Your head hit a boulder about 15 feet down.”

“That explains the headache” I snark.

“It was instant and I’m glad for that” she winces some.

“Tell me please” I ask her softly.

“When your body hit the bottom of the ravine, the impact snapped your neck and broke your spine in three places.”  She caresses my hair “If you had survived the fall … James, you would never have walked again.  Nor been able to play guitar again.”  She sighed heavily “Ever.” Her fingers gently caress my mustache. "Without the avalanche beacon, they would never have found your body."

It hits me what she’s just said.  “You were there.”

Nodding, “James, I haven’t left your side since you collected the twins after I died” she looks down for a second, then back to my eyes.  “I was lying next to you every time you cried yourself to sleep.  I would sing to you every night.  I was there in front of you begging you to put the beer or vodka back on the shelf at the store.”

The tears are streaming down my cheeks.  My fingers cup her head.  “There were times when I could have sworn you there.  Holding me.”  Smiling, she kisses the corner of my mouth.  “Because you were…”  She just nods slowly.  I pull her into me, hugging her tightly, kissing the top of her head.  Finally easing my hold on her, “Did it … hurt?”

“For a moment” she whispers

“You knew.”

Nodding into my chest, “I did.  There was a concrete wall to my right and three lanes of freeway traffic to my left.  Trying to turn the truck, we would have been broadsided by cars on both sides.  And all three of us would have died.”  She’s wrapped her arms around me.

“So you sacrificed yourself …”

“To save our children.  Yes.”

I again pull her tight to me.  “How are the twins now?”

Putting a hand in the middle of my chest, Y/N pushes up, kissing me, then smiling, “Come with me.”  She holds out her hand.  Looking at me, Y/N crinkles her nose some “This might make you dizzy.”

Pulling me from the bed we’ve been lying in, the moment my feet hit the floor, the room blurs-spins-shakes before coming back into focus.  We are sitting on the stairway ledge.  Mithril is sitting at the top of the stairs.  Staring.  “Hi Mithril” Y/N greets the massive cat.  It meows back at her. 

“He can see you?”  Y/N just nods.  The cat meows again softly.  Taking in the view, the twins are sitting at the dining room table doing homework.  Y/N’s other large cat - Caladan - is sitting in Ivy’s lap.  Staring at us.

Just then, Castor comes almost running to the stairs “Mom!” he steps over Mithril.

“What Castor?” Fran’s voice floats from the kitchen.

“First, the cat is staring again.  Second, have you seen my sweatshirt?”

“Leave the poor cat alone and your sweatshirt is on the back of a chair in here” Fran walks out into the dining room carrying a couple of mugs.  “Here you two go” setting the mugs down in front of the twins.

Forest takes his and sips some, whipped cream sticking to his upper lip.

Ivy’s fingers wrap around her mug.  “Fran?”

“Yes, Ivy?”

“Why are you staying with us?  Onkel Lars is our godfather” Ivy’s voice soft, verging on tears.

Fran sits at the table, “Yes, Lars is your godfather.  But he doesn’t want to live in Colorado.  You two have made it clear that you don’t want to live in Denmark.”  Castor sits at the table.  “You are James’ children.  I know how he’d want you two to be raised.”  She shrugs some.  “I wasn’t going to let just anyone raise you two.”

“You still love Dad” Ivy looks at my ex-wife.  Fran just nods slowly.

“But why are the others here too?” Forest asks bluntly.

Smiling at him, “Your older siblings want to be part of your lives too” as Marcella and Cali join the table with their own mugs.  Fran smiles at the two young women.

Marcella leans on the table, “Tell us about your Mom.”

I pull Y/N into my lap on the ledge as the six people gathered around the table start talking.  Telling stories.  About Y/N.  About me. 

As the day fades, I see silver beams glowing out the window running across the landscape.  Y/N sees my confusion.  “Those are lifelines.  They will all live long lives.”

“But whose that short one that fades?”

“Mithril’s or Caladan's. Not sure.” Y/N smiles at me.  “The kids all have long lines.  Even Fran’s is a long one” Y/N snuggles up close to me.

The people that have had to become family finally turn in for the night.  Y/N helps me navigate off the ledge.  Hand in hand, we check in on our twins.  In our daughter’s room, Y/N gently brushes a stray hair from Ivy’s forehead.  She sighs and snuggles into her pillow.  In Forest’s room, Y/N tugs the blanket a little closer to his chin.  He snorfels in his sleep.  In my older children’s rooms, I check on them.  As we walk down the hallway, I stop in what had been my bedroom.  Fran is again sleeping in my bed.  With both cats.  “Thank you Fran” I whisper.  Fran sighs and rolls to my side of the bed grabbing my pillow.  Y/N and I walk into the hallway.  Turning to Y/N, I hold out my hand to her.

Smiling gently at me, “Are you ready?” she whispers.

Nodding, I pull her to me.  Kissing her.  Her arms wrap around me.  Leaning my forehead against hers, “Yes.”

She pulls my head to her, kissing me.

“I love you James” she whispers to me.

“I love you Y/N” I whisper back as we kiss again.

The hallway fades away.  Our feet leave solid surface.  Stars begin to fill in around us.  Our arms wrap tighter around each other.  I look into her eyes seeing the stars reflected there.  Her smile glorious.  It starts with a rumble.  One that I recognize.  Grass slowly fills in below our feet.  A stadium materializes.  Candlestick Park.  A song echoes in my ears.  From behind me I hear him …

“James!  About time!”  Cliff is running towards me.  Red hair flying, his bass slung over his shoulder.  “C’mon!  I have some new riffs to show you!”

Hey Santa! I've been a very good girl! Please see above for my wish list!!

I went snorfelling and found this!