I Hope This E-mail Finds You Living In A Shotgun Shack

lol this Is me

jeremy: and now for a gay update with michael mell.

michael: getting gayer.

jeremy: thank you for the update.

a capitalist, a communist, and a monkey walk into a bar. the capitalist orders a whiskey and pays with his own cash. the communist orders a vodka and demands that the people around him pitch in.  the monkey doesn’t have any cash nor does it have the linguistic capabilities to ask for everyone around him to pitch in, and thus it goes home thirsty and a bit sad

Is nobody going to acknowledge the fact that Draco Fucking Malfoy was the first student in The Philosopher’s / Sorcerers Stone to properly curse

“If the lump had given this (the Remembral) a squeeze, he would have remembered to fall on his fat ARSE” 

The kid’s a legend

hahahaha… amateurs

this guy is from an alternate timeline

my magnum opus

the world has bigger problems than boys who kiss boys and girls who kiss girls. 🌈

i think it’s really important to know everyone’s favourite colour idk why some people left that in primary school