If Mary Was Given A Gun, The Whole Voldemort Thing Would've Been Solved In 30 Minutes. Argue With The

Quotes I associate with the Batkids because I think Bruce and the violence of the vigilante life irreparably messed them up but I also think they are all love perservering in their own ways

Dick

Barbara

Jason

Steph

Cass

Tim

Damian

james is SO cropped top and tiny shorts coded

i can’t believe i didn’t reupload this it’s hilarious

Laser Tag

PETER PARKER x HARLEY KEENER

Summary: What do you get when you put Peter and Harley together? A fucking gay disaster.

A/N: This is honestly super cute so I hope you guys like it. This is my first time writing for Parkner so please go easy on me and just letting everyone know that I absolutely butchered Harley’s southern accent so I’m extremely sorry.

Warning: Kissing. Two boys kissing / Gay couple. (🏳️‍🌈). Swearing.

Word Count: 880

Harley stared at the plastic gun in his hand, the blue light in it making a slight whirring sound. He let out a small groan as he looked back up at the dimly lit room, the LED lights glowing along the top of the ceilings in bright colors. He had no clue why he’d agreed to this. Maybe it was because of the puppy eyes that his boyfriend had pulled or the the way Peter’s bottom lip had jutted out slightly but now here he was, suffering for the joy of his lover. But I mean- wasn’t that what every relationship was? 

Sighing, he gently padded out of his hiding spot, quietly walking toward one of the towers, head whirling around every few seconds to makes sure there was no one around to shoot him. There were two teams. Pete, Ned, and MJ on Team Red. Him, Nebula, and Shuri on Team Blue. Smaller than your average laser tag teams but it still worked. Climbing up the ramp, he ducked down behind one of the windows, peeking his head up through the rectangular hole every few seconds to see if he could spot any blurs of red. When he spotted the familiar brown locks of Ned, he steadied himself, aiming at the red sensor on Ned’s chest and shooting. When Ned burst out in a few curses and walked away with slouched shoulders, he laughed a little to himself. Maybe this wasn’t too bad. 

Peter’s head was pressed against the black foam wall, curls a mess. His breath was slightly labored, eyes focused on the ceiling as he pressed the button on the side of his gun to reload it. He was the last one on his team, MJ hit by Shuri and Ned hit by Harley. He’d been able to hit Nebula but the other two were out there looking for him. Walking carefully over to a dark corner, he tried using his Spidey powers to his advantage, eyes already seeing much better in the dark than an average human.

When he saw Harley’s figure approaching him, Peter immediately brought up his gun, preparing to shoot but when he saw Harley’s arms go up, showing that he was surrendering, Peter dropped his gun down just a bit. What?

“Hi darlin’”, Harley drawled, his southern accent seeping through.

“Uhh…hi?”, Peter’s voice was quieter, softer. His head turning around to see if there was a tower near by where Shuri was waiting to get him. Harley’s own gun was hanging loosely by the trigger guard on his finger, carelessly swinging.

Harley took note of Peter’s frantic behavior, “Shuri’s on the other side of the arena sweetheart.” 

Pete didn’t look convinced, “Mmhhmm.”

When Harley took a step closer to him, Peter brought the gun back up slightly, eyes hardening and giving his boyfriend a quizzical look.

“Your not gonna shoot me, are you luv?”

Peter hated that his insides were melting. Harley was doing the thing. Honestly, fuck his boyfriend. Harley knew that his accent was Peter’s weakness. And his eyes. Hair too. We can probably through lips, body, and personality into the mix while we’re at it. 

Snapping out of the little lovestruck thing that was going through him, Peter glared at his boyfriend. “No. We’re not doing this right now.”

“Doing what, plum?”, Harley asked innocently. He was still walking towards Peter, albeit a little slower…but still.

“The nicknames and the accent and all…that.”, Pete gestured vaguely in Harley’s general direction. “You have to stop.”

“Is it working?”.

“Umm…no?”, Peter didn’t know why he bothered lying when he knew that Harley could see right through him. 

“No?”, Harley was close. Like really really close. Peter’s breath hitched as he took a small step back, his back pressed to the wall. Harley followed.

Pete gulped, “No.”

“Are yah sure?”.

Peter was eye level with Harley’s chest, the blue sensor practically mocking him. Glancing up, flushed pink lips met his gaze before hitting bright blue eyes that seemed to dilate slightly underneath his eyes. Why were his lips suddenly chapped? His throat felt like sandpaper, he needed water. Harley’s breath was warm against Peter, he smelled like sweat and something sweet. He smelled like home. One of Harley’s arms came to rest on the dark wall, the left of Peter’s head.

Pete cleared his throat, eyes on Harley’s lips, “Wha- what did you ask?”

Harley couldn’t help the small grin that enveloped his face, “Hhmm, nothin’ important.”

Leaning down, Harley’s lips gently encased his boyfriend’s, lips softly moving against each other. Peter’s hands instinctively wrapped around Harley’s neck, fingers entangling themselves in soft curls and ever so often tugging at the dark golden locks. When Harley ran his tongue over Peter’s bottom lip, asking for permission that Pete easily granted, Peter let out the smallest whimper.

Harley felt the tiniest bit guilty for what he was about to do next but they were playing Laser Tag with freaking Spider-Man, they needed to play dirty. Quickly and swiftly pressing the gun against Peter’s sensor, he pressed the trigger. 

Peter just sighed and gave Harley a look as Shuri’s cheer echoed through the room. 

“Sorry?”, Harley asked. He did feel bad for taking advantage of his boyfriend but…yeah.

“I fucking hate you, you know that?”

“I love you too darlin’”

That is the closest I’ll ever get to writing smut. :/ But yeah, anyway. Please reblog and like if you enjoyed. I hope all of you have a great day!

Thank you for tagging me @here-for-a-good-time-hopefully !!!

Last Song: Elodie by The Malefactors

Currently Watching: The Owl House (Again)

Currently Reading: Little Woman by Louisa May Alcott (I'm annotating it this time!)

Current Obsession: A Good Girls Guide to Murder by Holly Jackson (I'm SO Excited)

Blogs I thing are Cool :)

@amrut-aa @definitelynotttheo @whoopsiesnodaisies @calamitoustide

I was tagged by the lovely @folklorerose to do this tag game, thank you so much ♡

last song: Porta Retrato (acoustic version) by Vitor Kley

currently watching: Pantanal (Brazillian soap opera) and Gilmore Girls

currently reading: Sentimental Education by Gustave Flaubert

current obsession: Nothing specific at the moment except for clumsily traipsing around tumblr? 😛

no pressure tags: @und0miels, @fairmaidnelly, @softestofangel, @vienrosa, @cygnetprincess

no mourners, no funerals 🖤

me again, bothering you, but i am very interested in adhd james if you would like to share some of your hcs💖💖💖

you're not bother me at all! asks honestly give me so much serotonin. they really make my day :)

James was diagnosed really young. like, it was extremely obvious from the get-go that that child was not neurotypical

When he was a kid, he was very hyperactive. As he grew older, however, he sort of grew out of it. He has his high-energy days, but nothing to the caliber of child james

James was a menace as a kid

He was probably a backpack leash kid. you know exactly what I'm talking about

His parents are the ones who encouraged him to do sports a kid, just so he'd release some of that never-ending energy

James cycles through hyperfixations rapidly, and he hyperfixates on people a lot. Lily? He hyperfixated on her before. Sirius? You bet your ass. Literally anyone he's friends with, he probably hyperfixated on them at one point

My boy probably takes medication

Time just slips away from him. He's not a very punctual person because of that, but he really does try

He's the kind of person to have 1093843892 alarms on his phone that remind him to do the weirdest things. At least 6 of them are for waking up in the morning

delayed responses

"What?" "I said--" "Oh, the answer is [blank]"

James likes reading, but he cannot finish a book for the life of him

not interested? then he won't pay attention

horrible short term memory. frequently washes his hair twice because he couldn't remember if he already did. did he eat dinner already? don't ask James, he has no idea.

The Leg BounceTM

Impulsive. Sometimes dangerously so. No sense of self preservation

His spaces are organized chaos. It's messy, but he knows where everything is. At least, he knows most of the time

He may act like a very confident person, but James actually has a pretty low self image (yes, that's an adhd trait). One small mistake makes him question everything about himself

Horrible driver, but insists he's amazing. He drives like he's in a fast and furious movie

boredom is his worst enemy.

Is totally the kid that would forget a pencil all the time

Probably does his homework at the very last minute (on the drive to school, before the bell rings, etc etc), but somehow gets good grades on it???

makes Big Gestures when talking. He has, like, no control over his limbs and often hits people on accident. Profusely apologizes afterwards.

Watches television with the captions on. He can't understand what anyone is saying without them

When he's hyperfocused, he makes the strangest faces. Sirius always tells him that he'll get premature wrinkles if he keeps scrunching his face up like that

His notes app is a mess

His train of thought is constantly moving. It never stops. Never.

His biggest pet peeve is when people tell him he's "not trying" HE IS SHUT UP

James's adhd gets worse when he's playing sports. All the noise, all the moving, all the excitement-- it really sets off his hyperactivity, which is kind of a blessing when he's playing. It's like a life hack

James Potter is the definition of the word disheveled.

~~~♤~~~

He's always got that look in his eyes, you know the one.

He's kind a unfocused and his glasses are falling to the tip of his nose.

His hair is perpetually messy, he makes it look good but it's messy nonetheless.

He's always running around somewhere, probably knocking things over on his way.

Apologizes to inanimate objects... 100% apologizes to inanimate objects.

Says "wut?" Like a million times a day.

He replies to "Potter! >:(" better than he replies to his actual name.

Is so genuinely terrible at flirting its a little scary.

Tie always slung over his neck because he just... can't be bothered?

Buttons on his shirt done up wrong half the time.

Always late, Merlin help him.

Deer in headlights literally and figuratively.

He's got that total girly scream that follows with him clearing his throat and the deepest voice you've ever heard.

Dissociates from conversations then snaps back suddenly and nods along even though he has no idea what's happening.

"Mr. Potter!" "WASN'T ME!"

Will stare for a solid five seconds before processing what someone said.

Laughs louder than everyone else then quietly mutters "I don't get it"

He's a little wild, always up to something either dangerous or so stupid it should probably be considered dangerous.

Has ADHD.

That's it, he's just a little ADHD baby.

Can't go twenty seconds without pissing someone off.

Explodes with happiness.

Usually translates to smacking his friends repeatedly before pointing and shouting excitedly about something.

Pining after the same person for years even though they are SO MEAN TO HIM.

He actually loves it when they're mean to him.

He's just a chaotic mess and his friends love him so much

~~~♤~~~

it has been tuesday for 9 hours, 15 minutes and 27 seconds and im SO EXCITED for the crimson rivers update!!!!!

on the other hand

"James, your fever is 102 get in bed or your gonna DIE"

"reggieeeee, i sneezed like ONCE"

james and regulus are both the worst kind of sick people, and yeah i will explain it.

when james is sick, he will not rest. he will insist that he’s fine, all the while he can’t see straight and is on the verge of passing out. he will suffer through quidditch and school with a fever of 100+ without complaint. that boy refuses to be sick, even when he obviously is.

regulus, on the other hand, would complain left and right. complain about everything and nothing. he would shamelessly guilt trip people into doing everything for him. regulus being sick would be hilarious and wildly entertaining because somehow his lack of filter lacks even more of its filter and he just says anything.