Ok Not To Clown But I Looked At Cw_supernatural Instagram And The Activity Really Does Look Suspicious

my bf and I have the same fucking brain

“Modern Fairytale” by Syd and Olivia

Once upon a time in the Enchanted Wood, right next to the Sugar Plum Zoo, a pair of little twins did share a bed; a bed the size of a shoe. And every day and every night they’d do what little twins do. They’d play in the forest, and plant a big seed, they’d bake a big bread, and they’d frolic in glee. 

Thenst one day, a giant did step on their father’s big, burly, busty silhouette. And so, the twins were left with just step-mother, and she had plans for them. Plans of other.

For evil step-witch did not want any twins. She sent them away to the University of Michigan. 

“Now, this is how you will have a 401k. You will go to college, and find a job one day. It will be very simple, for it was when I was young, and then you’ll own a home with your very own sons.” 

“We’re daughters,” said the twins. 

“Oh shit, I didn’t notice. What were your names also? I don’t think the authors mentioned them at the top of this tale,” asked the step-mother. Evil, but always offering very constructive criticism. 

“My name is Piper,” said the daughter on the right, filled with chutzpah and up for a good fight. She had hair of bright red and a face full of freckles. She sang to the birds. Her sister was named Sheckles. 

“Well, Piper and Sheckles, go thee away and pick a major that will help you someday,” the step-witch threw the children out from the roof, and then she did push them off of the roof. The children did fall and landed in Michigan. 

So Piper and Sheckles skipped through the grass. They found a lily pad; the home of their first class. 

A toad was their teacher. His name was Miss Toad. Long live Miss Toad. 

Miss Toad sang a song to all of the class and it went like this, tweedle-dee, tweedle-dass. 

Miss Toad’s Song (To The Tune of Despacito). 

“Hello children, hello kids. 

My name’s Miss Toad, and here’s all my biz. 

You made a good choice by coming to college, 

It is the ONLY choice from my knowledge. 

For with a degree, you’re like a big tree. 

The degree is a seed, but the tree could be thee.” 

“What the fuck does that mean?” asked the twins. 

“Oh, shut up, you twins. You stupid, stupid, twins, and listen to my beautiful song. 

For if you don’t listen and don’t graduate, 

Your future will be all wrong. 

And if you have a degree and some learning from me, 

You can own a home in twenty-seven days flat. 

And if you study your math, and go to each clath, 

You will get all your dreams just like that-” 

The song ended abruptly as a hawk came in and ate Miss Toad. 

Piper and Sheckles swore to finish their education at the University of Michigan to honour the late Miss Toad. All hail Miss Toad who simply did not live as long as we wanted. 

So they took their school seeds and put them in dirt. And for four years the seeds did grow. And they watered the seeds, and rushed a sorority, and the seeds continued to grow. 

And then one day after four years of talk, the seeds became six-foot-five beanstalks, and Piper and Sheckles wiggled with glee. 

“I wonder, oh, what’s in my beanstalk for me?” 

Piper climbed it first, she liked to fight. She climbed up her beanstalk, and climbed it just right. Once at the top, she peeled back the leaves to see what had grown from her college degree. 

But nothing at all. It was just dust. 

Just dirt, and dust, and betrayal of trust. And a ghost, yest a ghost. The ghost of Miss Toad climbed out of the beanstalk that had just growed.

“Miss Toad, or your ghost, I don’t understand?” said Piper, with a whole lot of nothing in hand.  

“Well Piper, this is called a BFA. It’s worth nothing, and you owe me one-hundred-thousand dollars today,” said Miss Toad, as he hit Piper in the shins with one of those riding crop things. 

Sheckles called from across the way, “Sister, there’s nothing in my beanstalk for may!” 

“Miss Toad made promises of owning a home, but now I just owe one-hundred-thousand dollars, and his ghost is hitting me in the shins with one of those riding crop things.” 

So the twins did jump from their beanstalks so high and said, “We’ll figure out how to survive.” 

But they were not the first and they’ll not be the last to pay off student debt until they die. 

They went to jobs mouse and asked for a job, and the mouse said, “A job, now what is a job? You must have three-to-four years working at this before you can get your first job at this.” 

“What?” said the twins. 

“Exactly!” he said. 

So the twins walked down the road. The found the realestate badger, the badger of realestate, to find our young couple a house. Now they date. 

The twins, yes the twins, and a couple as well, said, “How do we purchase a house? What the hell?” 

“Well, you must pay in breadcrumbs, of which there are none, as we are in the middle of a recession. When I was a cub in the 1960s, I brought this cottage for four breadcrumbs, and now Zillow says it’s worth 3.46 million breadcrumbs and there isn’t even in-unit laundry. By the way, the federal minimum wage is seven breadcrumbs and twenty-five cents an hour before tax.” 

“Oh, whoopsie no, and whoopidey no!” said Piper, the feisty young twin, “Let us go to the only parent we know. See if she can help us win.”

So they went to their wicked step-mother indeed and said, “Dearest step-witch, we are in need. We tried to do things the way you said, and now the ghost of Miss Toad has a price on our head.”

The wicked step-mother looked them up and down. 

She said, “This is your fault,” and began to frown, “You were the ones who listened to me, and that is your fault, zipedeedee. But listen to me now, for this is quite right. The vaccine is filled with microchips, and blue lives matter, global warming isn’t real, but if it is, it’s your fault. Good luck having your own sons in this burning rubble of a failed society, you cucks. I’m on bath salts.” 

Then the wicked step-mother did jump off the roof, and run to the polls to vote for Jeffery Epstein Dead Sex-Offender for President of the United States of the Enchanted Wood right next to the Sugar Plum Zoo. 

And as the world started to burn, Piper asked Sheckles, “What did we learn?” 

“Well, my good Piper,” Sheckles did say, “We learned that the world is not okay. So, our step-mom’s on bath salts, and we owe a ghost money. What do we do, my twin and my honey?” 

So the twins made passionate sweet, sweet, love on a mushroom outside of a shoe. And that’s where our tale ends, sweet child of mine.

Now tell me please, what do I do?  

Wwdits as texts I've sent

I'm rewatching Good Omens, and noticed something in the first episode that has left me spiraling into a theory.

It's in the scene when Hastur and Ligur are handing Adam over to Crowley. Hastur asks Crowley to sign something beforehand, and:

I thought it was a scribble the first time I watched it bc I was trying to figure out what was going on. But it's not a scribble.

It's not a 'C' either, for 'Crowley' It's not a 'A' or 'J' either, for the rest of his name.

It's an 'L'. It gets hard to see as he's finishing it, but it's the letter 'L'

This is how you write a capital 'L' in cursive:

you swoop up and to the right, drop down, swoop left, and finish on the right.

and Crowley does this with his signature:

here's him beginning the letter, swooping up and to the right

Then he moves down,

loops to the left,

And finishes it as he moves back towards the right (and at this point, the complete letter is hard to make out. It's why I thought it was a scribble the first time I watched this episode)

Crowley's signature on the document Hastur makes him sign before delivering the Antichrist to start Armageddon, something that is arguably one of the most important things hell wants to document, is an 'L'.

WHY?

Why not a 'C', for Crowley, the name he currently goes by? Hastur and Ligur confirm the name itself earlier in the same scene ("What's he calling himself up here these days?"/"Crowley.")

Well, if going by what he claims in a later s1 episode that "Crowley" is his last name (Anthony J. Crowley), it would make sense for one of his initials to be put there.

Except it doesn't, because "Crowley" is not his real name. it's not the name he began with, the one he had as an angel.

So then, what would this name be? What would be a name for an angel, who is now a demon? A demon who was there to tempt eve, as a snake, into eating the forbidden fruit. Someone that brought the stars, and light, to the universe. A name that begins with the letter 'L'.

There's one I can think of that matches, and that name is Lucifer.

"But Squish!" I know some of y'all will comment, "What about that line Crowley said in episode 5? He mentions Lucifer, so it can't be him!"

In episode 5, Crowley says the following: "I never asked to be a demon. I was just minding my own business one day and then...oh, lookie here, it's Lucifer and the guys! Oh, hey, the food hadn't been that good lately. I didn't have anything on for the rest of that afternoon. Next thing, I'm doing a million-light-year dive into a pool of boiling sulphur."

Crowley also says in the second episode: "I didn't mean to fall. I just hung out with the wrong people."

A lot of people believe that it's implied that when Crowley said this, it meant he met Lucifer and hung out with him. But when he says it, it sounds like he's mockingly quoting someone else, talking to him.

The "Lucifer and the guys!" might've been directed to Crowley, using his name. This would match that line from a previous episode, "hung out with the wrong people."

"But Squish!" I know some of y'all will comment after reading that, "What about Satan? Lucifer is Satan, and Crowley isn't Satan!"

And neither is Beelzebub. Fun fact, by the way: One of the many names for The Devil, Satan himself, is Beelzebub. But Beelzebub is a whole different character. So why can't Lucifer be a whole different character too? After all, many people still argue to this day that Lucifer and Satan aren't one and the same...

Also, here's something interesting:

Crowley is the only character in the tv series that has mentioned Lucifer, and it was in that line I mentioned earlier. Lucifer is also mentioned once, in the book, but by Shadwell, mishearing Newt's last name as "Lucifer" instead of "Pulsifer". And Satan? In both the book and the tv show, he is never called another name other than "Satan", usually followed by his fancy and long title. His description in the book's "DRAMATIS PERSONAE" is literally "fallen angel; the adversary". No Lucifer.

And how about this:

Crowley was the one who started the universe, we see that at the beginning of season 2. He was the first one, to our knowledge, to say "let there be light." "Lucifer" means "light-bringer" Crowley was the snake that tempted eve into eating the apple in the garden of eve. We see this in the beginning of episode one. Many claim Lucifer was the one who did that. Crowley fell because he asked questions about how the universe should be run, after seeing its creation and being so proud of it. Many claim Lucifer's big sin that sent him falling was his pride stemming from his beauty causing him to revolt; eerily similar to Crowley asking questions after watching the beautiful universe he helped plan be born and growing protective after learning it was going to get shut down so early in its lifetime, isn't it? Crowley was a powerful angel. This is heavily implied in season 2, with the tiny joint-miracle he and Aziraphale made being as powerful as an archangel's. He has the ability to mask his presence powerful enough to fool Uriel, Michael, and Gabriel (the only other character we've seen have that kind of masking power was the Metatron, who Crowley was also the first to recognize). When going through records with Muriel, they claim only very high-ranking angels have clearance to look through the records of Gabriel, an archangel so powerful he single-handedly had the power to stop "Armageddon 2" from being put into plan; Crowley is able to access them. And Lucifer? Often described as having been a very powerful angel.

Lucifer is such an important name, such an important character, in the theologies surrounding Good Omens. So, where is he? Why has he only been mentioned seriously once, by Crowley?

The answer could be this, simple and short: Because he is Crowley.

EDIT:

I dug up the book. It's been a while since I read it (I honestly don't remember much from the book) and here's what it has to say about Crowley's signature...

"Your real name."

.........

HELLO?

alright, fuck it

WE DESERVE WAYWARD SISTERS

WE DESERVE TO SEE JODY, DONNA, ALEX, PATIENCE, CLAIRE, AND KAIA BEING HAPPY

REBLOG THIS UNTIL SOMEONE OF HIGH STANDING IN THE TV WORLD SEES IT

Bippity boppity bace

You are now ace

Bippity boppity bay

You are now gay

I dip my Delaware in a nice, toasted glass of milk

hold on a fucking second. delaware is a state?? i thought it was a river? or is the river more important than the state? why don't i know this? (i should mention i don't like in america, i'm just confused)

there is delaware (state) and delaware (river) 

both are equally strange

the state is a tiny little cryptid thing

the rive is a monster that spans new york, pennsylvania, new jersey and delaware. also washington crossed it once and that was like kinda a big deal i guess. like crossing the rubicon in rome.

the state tries to me more important with its “im the first state!!!” bs (seriously its even on the fucking license plates) but we all know. its the river.

My takeaway from Good Omens 2;

If you like someone, give them a pet fly.

rating: E words: 6623 relationships: The Trickster/Dean Winchester, Gabriel/Dean Winchester, Gabriel/Michael (Implied) other tags: One Night Stands, Canon Compliant, Tall Tales, Secret Identity, Power Bottom Gabriel (Supernatural), Oral Sex, Misnaming, Wrong-Naming status: complete

summary:

As if in response to his thoughts, his own name, “Dean,” is being whispered syrup-slow under his ear. The guy has an interesting way of saying it, like it’s a puzzle piece he’s turning over. Inspecting it. Easing it into place with his tongue against the roof of his mouth.

Everybody has their own backstory. Dean gets a glimpse of the janitor’s mid-way through Tall Tales.