Billy Steve And Hot Spring 

ahem did anyone think about middle aged tommy kinard with his glasses and greying temples, married to abby clark for two decades and some change, professor of aerospace engineering at this fancy grad school, being tested by this hotspur new kid in his class who gets welcomed by loud cheers of "buck!" anytime he enters a room, who gives everyone but especially tommy the wildest grins, and who simply does not take no for an answer?

if yall didn't, they fuck in tommy's office after hours, after months of buck teasing tommy to hell and back, and tommy trying to rein in all his advances with half-concealed threats. you're welcome.

Sort of bums me out that so many people didn't seem to Get the Cat King so here are my thoughts:

So let's start with Edwin's crime. He uses something the cat desires (a sardine) to lure the cat to him and then uses an enchanted string to trap the cat with magic. He demands the answer to a question in exchange for its release. Edwin knows it is dangerous to use magic on a cat, that it violates Rules but he does it anyway.

Binding a creature and agreeing to set them free under a certain condition is very Classic Fairytale. its also a favourite trope of Neil Gaiman's (he did not write this show but his influence is there). In both the Sandman and his novel Stardust (and the film adaptation) trapping a creature with magic and demanding a task/favour in exchange for their freedom is an extremely important plot point. Edwin binding a cat and demanding an answer in exchange is exactly in line with this Fairytale trope

And so is the Cat Kings response. The Cat King is a trickster. What he does to Edwin is exactly what Edwin did to one of his subjects. He entices Edwin, he binds him with magic and when Edwin demands to be free he turns his own words against him "why all the fuss for one little spell?" Edwin did something wrong. He imposed his will/magic on another creature and the Cat King is punishing him for it in a way that is poetic. Its fairytale. its trickster. its classic.

I've also seen people complain that the task Edwin was given 'count all the cats' is 'impossible'...except its fucking not. Edwin does it. He does it so well he actually BEATS the Cat King ("you didn't count yourself" Are.You.Kidding.Me. Classic!Fairytale!Vibes!)

The Cat Kings choice to bind Edwin to Port Townsend is good on so many levels. From a storytelling perspective it forces characters who can travel anywhere in the world to stay in one place, and increases the stakes for these characters who are supposed to be on the run. From a genre perspective...its an excellent use of fairytale tropes using both Rules of magic, a protagonist who is unkind to a seemingly weak creature who is punished by a more powerful law, a binding, a task to complete, etc

Which just leaves the character perspective which it ALSO does really fucking well and introduces the final aspect to the Cat Kings character. He's seductive. He is responsible for Edwin, 100 years old ghost boy, finally unpacking his internalized homophpbia. he is the catalyst (cat pun not intended)

He pushes Edwin, challenges him, at times literally forces the truth out of Edwin, but he really never does violate his consent. Significantly Edwin is attracted to him, like its an important part of his character that he is. He may not like the Cat King but he is attracted to him!

The Cat King is such a great example of a trickster, a morally grey character who imposes a sense of justice on Edwin after he crosses a line, but also has his own selfish interests and meddles. Hes so important to the plot of the show, to Edwin's character arc, to the genre.

And he's just fun. Unapologetically queer, powerful, complicated. Silly little outfits. Petty cat behavior. Deep heart.

Some of you just didn't get it. And I'm sorry for you. because the Cat King is Excellent actually.

zanethan y la 🧀

This is the greatest thing ever

trick or treat!!

(headcanons? for the coven maybe?)

(continuity- the fabled crack!fic)

Alice- the only morning person among a coven of night people. Really enjoys jogging, was very into death metal for a while as a rebellion against her mother, gets into making artisan beers and funky stained glass pieces after the Road. refused to let anyone help her magically move her mother's piano, which created a fairly amusing scene for the Proctors/John one Saturday afternoon as they attempted to get the thing in the house.

Lilia- the only motherfucker who can cook in this entire damn household (wanda is her most eagar apprentice). has considered hexing the kitchen to keep everyone else out. once did hex everyone involved when she walked in on unnamed individuals playing texas hold 'em with tarot cards from the 17th century. absolutely refuses to help agatha to short the stock market (again).

Jen- if she's going to be stuck with you people, you're at least not going to embarrass her; the coven wide skincare situation has never been more on point. brings billy with her to a couple of beauty/youtube cons, and he becomes a popular feature on her channel. does product testing on rio; the more rio enjoys it, the more toxic something is. senor scratchy oversees the process. sets up her lab upstairs in the former office "because not all of us lurk in basements like stereotypes, agatha."

Billy- living his absolute best life. frequently has the Kaplans over; he can't live with them anymore b/c of the insane amount of risk his physical person and the near constant presence of the scarlet witch and agatha thee harkness causes. he started a scoreboard in the living room, where he tallies up beings that come to the house looking to revenge/challenge- agatha's winning, but wanda's not far behind. everyone else is lumped into one category and losing badly. the kaplans are... adjusting. there is a lowkey conspiracy to teach rebecca witchcraft. he keeps eddie away for as long as possible, and then tries to introduce him to each of his new relatives one at a time. this does not go well.

Rio- is really only hanging out to see if she can drive wanda or agatha over the edge and into another killing spree. everything else is just her fucking around for her own amusement. does weird shit on purpose- eats raw meat and insects just to gross everyone else out. is not allowed unsupervised with the kaplans. built a complex terrarium set up for the tarantula, and frequently shape shifts to join him in there. the tarantula's name is typhon. the garden situation in the backyard has never been more lush and/or deadly. lilia and jen are never short on ingredients, but usually triple check to make sure what they're grabbing.

Wanda- has never been more understood in her entire life and is absolutely mystified. the first time she and jen get in an argument, and wanda accidentally breaks something- she freezes, expecting a wave of fear. jen just laughs and points, breaking a plate too with a swirl of rose gold sparkles. they spent the next ten minutes cheerfully breaking agatha's third best china until she busts them, and joins in too. no one particularly cares if wanda's too damaged, about how many people she's killed, if she can't control her powers, if she can't quite remember how to move like a human being. one way or another there's someone here who gets it- and that's the strangest part of all.

Agatha (all along)- unfortunately in charge here. couldn't give less of a shit about it. having to adjust to being around witches she's not actively trying to kill, while being her own weird ass self, not one of her personas. unclear what this strange feeling is in her chest (it's happiness- she's just never met it, so the sensation is alien). is the first to read whoever fucked up today into the ground. is also the first to kill anyone who looks at her coven sideways. experiencing the mortifying ordeal of being known and being very, very undignified about it. the rabbit continues to live like a tiny king. exploring other hobbies that aren't murder/plotting murder/scheming on how to plot a murder.

My biggest regret is not watching Supernatural or reading Destiel fanfiction sooner because for some reason I didn't find Misha Collins

I still don't know what was wrong with me and I deeply regret my sinful actions and now understand the beauty of Misha Collins

WHAT THE FUCK IS TH9ISK

Heres the link shawtys

Wylan: Morning all, I had trouble sleeping last night

Wylan: I’ll be sassy throughout the day and simmering into the evening. Prepare for a possible tantrum around 3pm… and it will be your fault

Wylan: So lockdown the hatches, be ready and stay alert

Reblog to make him lose another 200 billion, like to make him lose 1 billion

Hand, Hearth, and Home

- Master Post -

Summary

Pairing(s): Astarion x Male Tav (Main); Past OC x Male Tav Rating: Explicit Length: 319K+ words; Chapters 62/?? [ONGOING]

In their respective, wary calculations, Astarion and Church know that they very well could be the death of each other. Years after losing his childhood friend and first love, Church reminds himself not to get too attached. Sabotaging those plans is Astarion, who just won’t leave him alone — all in the name of using the warlock as a means to an end, of course.

But when Church’s friend unexpectedly returns as a certain guardian in their dreams, it makes his already conflicted, burgeoning feelings far more complicated. And yet, as the trust between him and Astarion grows, Church learns to let go of the past that holds him back from embracing a brighter future — no matter how uncertain it may be here at the vampire spawn’s side.

Start from the beginning!

Individual Chapter Posts 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 | 26 | 27 | 28 | 29 | 30 | 31 | 32 | 33 | 34 | 35 | 36 | 37 | 38 | 39 | 40 | 41 | 42 | 43 | 44 | 45 | 46 | 47 | 48 | 49 | 50 | 51 | 52 | 53 | 54 | 55 | 56 | 57 | 58 | 59 | 60 | 61 | 62 | [...]

The way this makes so much sense

okay agatha all along episode 6 spoilers and also possibly absurdly outlandish theory incoming

i have a theory about lilia putting the sigil on billy. i assume she put it on him because she saw something that would endanger him if everyone immediately knew who he was and i initially foolishly assumed she was referring to agatha because you know. agatha is mildly unhinged after all

but I'm starting to think it's rio....because there's the theory going around that rio is death personified and honestly it makes so much sense. she can't kill agatha because death can't Kill others, it can only come when it's called. her power would kill agatha because it's a death domain power and either it's innate to her and only she can handle it, or you can only earn death related abilities a certain way. (also she's THE green witch. ashes to ashes and dust to dust etc every body returns to the earth)

in episode 5 she mentions that she hates ghosts which makes sense because she'd see them as perverting the natural cycle and clinging onto a semblance of life after death. so what on earth do we think rio would do if she knew that Billy's soul was possessing someone who's supposed to be dead? somehow i don't think it'll be pretty.

the sigil breaks at a weirdly specific point, too. it's after agatha kills alice, which means that rio is going to be preoccupied for a little while at least, giving billy and Agatha some time to discuss things. and if rio is death then agatha is likely the only person who knows that, and if we're getting technical the sigil only breaks once AGATHA concretely puts together that teen is billy.

lilia's divination works VERY weirdly, she's all out of time and often doesn't seem to remember her premonitions, but I would bet that the sigil was created with the knowledge that it would be broken once agatha specifically was the one to put the pieces together. because agatha knows rio and therefore she knows death. and we've seen already that agatha is VERY emotionally intuitive, it's what makes her so good at being a dickhead to others because she reads tells and emotional wounds so easily and knows exactly when she's hit a nerve. so i wouldn't put it past her to know Rio thoroughly enough to be the one to keep billy safe from her.

i just think the timing of the reveal is all very coincidental. not like, bad writing or anything, but the fact that agatha figures out it's billy AND has a whole emotional reunion with him with every other member of the coven missing feels a lot like Fate (which would probably come under lilia's domain). because now agatha and billy have an understanding of each other that will make it easier for them to walk the road together, but ALSO, nobody else knows. and agatha, who knows that rio is death and knows how rio feels about breaking the life-death cycle, can keep it a secret for him. she can protect him, even if he doesn't trust her.

anyway theory over but i swear to god billy and agatha better have the most lovely found family story arc. billy claims he doesn't need agatha but agatha has already adopted him in wanda's stead because she remembers being angry at the world like he is. oh and also she knows he does need her because death could be after him now lol