May I Remind You That He Is The Prince Consort And A Member Of The Imperial Family?

“How could you do this?” The hero couldn’t hide their pain from showing in the broken words.

“I don’t know what you mean.” The villain’s own face was still, emotionless, their voice cold and lifeless.

“I trusted you. I trusted you and I believed in you and I believed that you could be better, but this—this is…” The hero broke off, brushing the angry tears from their eyes. “You are killing thousands—millions—of people, just to save one.”

“It’s not just one person,” the villain whispered, taking one slow, heavy step closer to the hero. Their trembling fingers, the flash of pain in their eyes, was the only sign that they were feeling anything at all. “It’s you—it’s always been you.”

They stepped closer, took the hero’s hand in theirs, sending shivers down the hero’s spine that froze them in place, unable to move or think or breathe.

“It’s you, and I would burn this world to the ground to keep you safe.”

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“Please.”

The hero barely heard the whispered word. Their head was throbbing, the world around them swimming in and out of focus and there was so much blood so much blood so much blood everywhere and agony ripping through their chest—

“You have to live. You have to, you have to, you have to, please.”

The hero was hallucinating, they had to be, because those were the villain’s eyes looking down at them, that was the villain’s voice, filled with pain and panic and something else the hero couldn’t name. The hero blinked and they were lost again, gone in a haze of blood and darkness, spinning away into nothingness…

“No!” the villain cried out, desperation creeping into their voice as they pressed their hands tighter to the hero’s side, a hopeless attempt to stop the bleeding. “You can’t die,” the villain whispered, voice hoarse and cracking, chest heaving with silent, broken sobs. “I’ll do anything you want, be anything you want, I promise. Just live.”

The hero fought to hold on to the words, to open their eyes to see something, to open their mouth to say something but they were slipping away, falling

falling

falling

“Please.”

Did you know that many gastropods can create a pearl, including terrestrial snails? The difference is nacre which is only found in some species of mollusks and which which gives pearls their beautiful shine. Terrestrial snails occasionally produce very small translucent white pearls which are usually lost. One non-nacre secreting sea snail, the melo melo, produces gorgeous pearls that are extremely prized and rare.

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Figuring out your OC's 'voice' and physicality/characterization

I often struggle with creating distinct characters, so I came up with some questions about your OCs that I haven't seen in any other lists.

I recommend answering these for each character once you've already spent some time with them on the page.

What irks other people about the way they converse?

What kind of conversations do they usually have?

Are they a good listener?

How do they react to confrontation?

How do they react to being corrected?

How do they correct others?

Do they tend to speak in long sentences, short & clipped sentences, or somewhere in between?

How likely are they to heed social cues when talking to others?

How likely are they to use body language rather than words to express discomfort and other emotions?

Do they care more about getting their way, or more about how others feel?

What's their favourite skill?

What niche thing are they competent at?

What trait immediately draws them to other people?

What trait immediately repels them?

Even if they haven't met (or even if they're not even in the same universe!), what would your other OCs' first impression of them be?

What makes them angry?

What makes them sad?

What makes them happy?

What's their posture like?

How do they want others to see them?

How do they move through a room?

Do they prefer being barefoot, and if not, what kind of footwear do they usually like best?

What kind of climate do they prefer?

What would make them distrust somebody?

What would they consider the greatest betrayal?

An aye-write guide to Showing vs. Telling

I’ll bet that if you’ve ever taken an English class or a creative writing class, you’ll have come across the phrase “Show, don’t tell.”  It’s pretty much a creative writing staple! Anton Chekov once said “ Don’t tell me the moon is shining. Show me the glint of light on broken glass.” In other words, showing should help you to create mental pictures in a reader’s head.

Showing helps readers bond with the characters, helps them experience the emotions and action more vividly, and helps immerse them in the world you have created. So “show, not tell” is definitely not bad advice - in certain circumstances. But it has its place. More on that later. 

.-.-.

So How do I Show? 

Dialogue

Thoughts/Feelings

Actions

Visual Details

So instead, of telling me “He was angry”, show me how his face face flushes red, how his throat tightens, how he slams his fist, how he raises his voice, how his jaw clenches, how he feels hot and prickly, how his breathing gets rapid, how his thoughts turn to static, etc.

Instead of telling me “The cafeteria was in chaos”, you could show me  someone covered in food and slowly turning crimson, children rampaging under the feet of helpless adults, frenzied shouting, etc. 

Handy Hint! Try to avoid phrases like “I heard”, “I felt”, “I smelled”, etc. These are still “telling words” (also known as filters) and may weaken your prose, as your readers could be taken out of the experience and you may lose their attention.

.-.-.

Is Showing Always The Right Thing to Do? 

No! Showing is not always right and telling is not always wrong! It’s important to develop the skill and instinct to know when to use showing and when to use telling, as both can be appropriate in certain occasions. 

So, “Show, don’t tell” becomes “Show versus tell”. 

.-.-.

What is Showing and Telling? 

Showing is “The grass caressed his feet and a smile softened his eyes. A hot puff of air brushed past his wrinkled cheek as the sky paled yellow, then crimson, and within a breath, electric indigo”

Telling is “The old man stood in the grass and relaxed as the sun went down.”

Both of these excerpts are perfectly acceptable to use in your writing! But both do different things, although their meanings are pretty much the same. The first example is immersive, sweeping, visual, engaging. The second example is much more pared back and functional. But both have their places in prose! 

Telling is functional. Think about when you tell people things. You tell your children dinner is ready. The news reporter tells you there’s a drop in crime rates. Your best friend tells you she’ll be late because her car broke down on the way to yours. These are brief and mundane moments in everyday life. 

So, do these deserve multiple paragraphs with sensory detail and action/feeling/thought for every little thing? Do you need to spend an entire paragraph agonising over a minor detail when there’s a sword dangling (physically or metaphorically) over your MC’s head? No. And I’ll explain why.

.-.-.  

When To Use Telling

As before, telling is functional. It’s brief. It’s efficient. It gives a gist of a situation without getting bogged down in detail.

Showing is slow, rich, expansive, and most certainly not efficient! 

Here’s an example of some telling: 

“Years passed, and I thought of Emily less and less. I confined her to some dark dusty corner of my brain. I had to elbow my memories of her to the side. I was too busy with other things. Finishing school, then university a year later. Life was full and enjoyable. But then, one dark cold September night…”

You can’t show this example, unless you wanted to waste page after page of your MC waking up, going through everyday life, to get to the point your actual story started. If you do that, you will likely kill off any interest a reader would have in your novel and likely, your book itself.

.-.-.

Summing Up 

Showing: 

Should be used for anything dramatic

Uses thoughts, feelings, dialogue, action, and visual detail 

Will likely be used more than telling

Telling: 

Delivering factual information

Glossing over unnecessary details 

Connecting scenes

Showing the passage of time 

Adding backstory (not all at once!) 

“Don’t… wink at me!” The hero snapped at the villain. 

How to Read

some references for the writing tip: "read a lot" / "read widely"

Active Reading ⚜ Tips for Active Reading

Critical Reading ⚜ Identifying Character Descriptions

Evaluating Sources ⚜ Primary Sources ⚜ Source Integration

Narrative Elements ⚜ Note Taking ⚜ Read like a Writer

Scientific Article ⚜ Your Reading Journal

More: Writing Tips & Advice ⚜ Editing ⚜ Writing Resources PDFs