Checkmate, I Couldn't Lose - Christian Pulisic

“he is someone that a prince is based off of and maybe in another world, he would actually be my prince, but we don’t all get our happy endings”😩🥺🤍

jo & laurie & amy al12 & cl16

word count: 6k!

i am in love with my best friend. and i think he’s in love with me.

i’m not trying to be vain but i can’t deny that the way he looks at me is a look of love, lust and passion, matching the one i give him.  

i’ve never been in love with anyone but him. when we first met all those years ago it was like cupids arrow had pierced through my heart and since then i have been infatuated with charles leclerc.

the truth is though, who wouldn’t be? what’s not to like? he has the dimples that appear even after the worlds worst jokes and eyes that would have you hooked as his gorgeous plump lips ramble about a number of different things, he has everything a girl could want.

and yet he never made a move on anyone else. it’s just been me and him, y/n and charles, the dynamic duo. 

until that day on the hill.

i’m not oblivious to the fact that time is going on and that our lives are getting shorter and shorter each day, i know that if you want something so bad then just go for it or else you’ll miss your chance. i’m also not oblivious to the attention charles gets, i know he’s so gorgeous and attractive but how am i meant compete with those front cover models?

“it’s a nice day today, isn’t it?” charles asks me, his eyes squinted due to the beaming sun.

‘any day with you is a nice day’ my thoughts say as i quickly come up with a response.

“it really is” 

“did you hear that theodora got married and carlas off to paris for uni. it’s like time has finally caught up with us. and i’ll be off at the races again soon, which leaves you all alone, because unlike my mother and enzo you will never have anything to do that doesn’t end up leaving you even more getting bored.” 

everything he says is true and extremely saddening. when he’s gone i will have nothing to do but wallow in sadness, thinking about all the beautiful women he will meet day in and day out.

“you don’t have to go, you could stay here”

this is the moment he will say he loves me back and we can run off into the distance together and live our lives peacefully.

he laughs at me, probably at how ridiculous of an idea that was. 

“why do you want to run away and maybe sail away on a pirate ship far into the distance.”

i just look at him. taking in all the beauty i can see right now and i appreciate it for the hundredth time because i know that this is the last time he will look at me as if i am just a friend.

i inhale deeply and charles notices and i can tell he knows. he knows i am in love with him but instead of a look of happiness, i receive a look of what i can only perceive as anger. 

“no y/n.”

those two words break me. 

“don’t y/n”

i now understand what heartbreak actually is. it feels as if you’re heart has been pulled out of your chest and stomped on over again as they point and laugh at you as if you are a child.

i can’t help but try and fight the truth of situation, i mean what else am i meant to do in the heat of the moment, just back away without a fight? i am incredibly in love with this man and i can’t seem to let him go, it would hurt to much.

“charles, i’ve loved you since the moment i met you and i tried to ignore it at first but it just got to much and you were just so perfect that i couldn’t help it and i tried to let you know earlier but you would always shrug the topic away but now you have to listen to me and give me an answer once and for all because i can’t deal with this any longer, i really can’t.” 

 tears are streaming down my cheeks when i am finished. i am in pain but no one could ever understand me. i am in love with a man that will never EVER love me back and yet i was so naive that i dug my hole deeper by begging for him to give me just one chance. 

he speaks but i can barely hear it as my ears and my head have gone numb. 

“charles you don’t understand how hard i’ve worked to please you and keep you happy, and i gave up hanging out with my other friends to spend time with you and i’ve never complained because i thought that you would finally notice me and that you would say how much you loved me even though i’m not half as good as those-”

“you are good enough y/n. in fact you’re too good for me and i am so happy that you’ve been there for me all this time because i’m so grateful and proud of you y/n and i’m sorry that i can’t love you the way you love me i really am.” 

“you can’t love me?”

“i can’t magically change the way i feel about you and i wouldn’t want to lie and i do love you like that when i really don’t, it wouldn’t be fair, i’m sorry y/n, i’m so desperately sorry that i can’t love you the way you want me to but i can’t change the way i feel.”

i take two steps back, stumbling slightly as if the words that charles has just uttered are boxing gloves that hit me over and over again in the stomach.

“well i can’t love anyone else but you charles.  trust me i’ve tried.” 

“y/n it would never work even if we tried our hardest. i would be away all the time and you love your job enough that you would never quit it! and the way i fold my clothes and cook my food winds you up we just wouldn’t work!”

“if you loved me charles then i wouldn’t care, but only if you loved me”

“i’ve tried again and again and i’ve failed.”

“everyone expects it, the media, carlos, your family everyone so charles say you’ll be mine and we can run away together and be happy!”

“i can never say ‘yes’ with all my heart say i won’t say it and eventually you will look back at this and see that i was right and you’ll thank me for it, trust me when i say that.” 

“i would rather die then love someone that wasn’t you!”

“no y/n you’ll find the perfect man one day and you’ll love him ten times more than you loved me and you’ll see that there is love after heartbreak. you’ll see how we never would’ve worked and that this love you feel for me right now was nothing but the love of a friend. you’ll see how i would’ve made the worlds worst husband and that the way i do things is so unbearable.”

“anything else?”

“no… except from the fact that i don’t think i will ever love and marry someone as much as you did for me and i don’t mind because i’m happy how i am now.”

i shake my head, how can a statement be so untrue.

“you will love someone. you will live and die for them, waiting on their beck and call and i know that because it’s just true, and i will watch in the corner of sorrow and under the watchful pity eyes.”

“y/n…”

i walk away. the two normal beating hearts that entered the conversation are now like shards of glass and we both cry, even charles, the one that broke and stole my heart.

it’s been many years since that day yet, he still manages to haunt me, in my dreams, in the faces of the people i walk past day to day and yet i have gotten nothing but silence from you. i’ve been forced to move on with my life even if my heart is still stuck in my past and i can’t help but reminisce on what could’ve been. 

i’ve tried doing different things to get my mind off, which is why i am currently walking down the roads of monaco. the sun is beaming down on my face and for a moment i feel as if i am free, unaware that at the start of the street is arthur leclerc. 

little arthur leclerc, the one that would always try and barge into charles’ room whenever i was around and the one that had fallen in love with me, though i never took notice. i never noticed the way he lit up with joy whenever i was around, or how his cheeks were always a deep shade of red whenever i would speak to him. i didn’t notice because i was too in love with charles, or i was just blind. it’s probably both. 

arthur leclerc sits in the passenger seat of his friends car, who is chatting away, though arthur is not taking in a single word, too busy looking out at the world that surrounds him. he looks at all the people that are lost in their own world admiring how they look so peaceful, until he sees her,

the girl that made him realise love at first sight was real. she was the girl that made little him realise that just because he loves someone doesn’t mean they have to love you back. the girl that made him smile just because of her presence.

“y/n! stop the car! y/n!”  

he jumps out immediately, leaving his poor friend all alone in his car, though arthur doesn’t care as he runs towards the girl from his past.

“oh arthur! oh how you’ve grown! the last time i saw you, you were up to my shoulder, now look at you, i’m up to your shoulder!”

it’s true, arthur was a new man, he was handsome and so mature, he… well he looked like charles.. but better? i’m not sure. 

“yeah, it sure has been a long, long time! i was waiting to see you at the hotel party!”

“you were very hard to find and i couldn’t see you and trust me i looked far and wide!” 

“well you didn’t look hard enough”

“maybe we passed at one point but you’ve become so beautiful, i just coulnd’t recognise you!” 

he pulls a face at my compliment and laughs. 

“oh please”

“why? what did i say? i was just being hones-” i can’t keep a straight face and i burst out laughing, i never was a good actress or charmer.

“no, not at all. where’s your mother and father anyway?”

“they’ve gone to london, leaving me all on my own but it’s okay, at least i’m having fun”

“by having fun, do you mean drinking and clubbing and flirting?” his voice is teasing me and i don’t seem to mind, it’s been a while since i’ve seen him of course,

“oh please don’t tell your mother!” i tease him back, i’ve always loved his mother,

“well what are you doing here hmm? are you chasing some strapping young gentlemen.”

ouch. i know he’s joking but it still hurts to be reminded of what has happened in the past so i put on a half hearted smile on my face and say “no”

he instantly drops his cheerful tone and instead puts a more thoughtful and sombre look. 

“oh.. i… i couldn’t believe that charles turned you down, i thought it was all some joke at first, i’m sorry.”

“don’t be. you’re not charles so it’s okay and i expected it.”

“OI ARTHUR! COME BACK” arthur’s friend shouts, still sat in his car.

we laugh, a real one.

and as arthur runs back to the car he’s shouting “come to the new years party! everyones going so you wouldn’t want to miss out. oh and you can finally meet laura! meet me at the hotel at lets say seven and wear your nicest dress!”

“i will!” i say and then i am gone, my mind returning to the sad mood it was in earlier.

arthur watches from his seat, turning his head to meet the annoyed face of his pal.

“it’s y/n!”

“i know”

he looks at her again with so much love, the same amount he’s loved her since he met her.

it was gorgeous. the atmosphere, the decor, the banquet, everything, it was so beautiful, well at least what i could remember. arthur leclerc stands in the middle of the room chatting away, of course due to him being the favourite shining star in the room. he switches between dancing with his partner laura and then drinking with his friends, overall charming everyone that he passes by. but his mood goes sour after spotting me, in my drunken haze chatting obnoxiously with two men i had found on my way to the venue, sat on the sofa placed on the edge of the room.

he frowns and sighs as he pulls himself together to approach us without making a scene.

“y/n” he scolds, his hands placed on his hips.

“arthur” i reply back, mocking his tone of voice

“i waited and waited”

“i’ve been caught I waited an hour for you.”

“i’ve been caught gents” i say putting my hands up. 

arthur scoffs and turns around, walking away, which causes me to follow.

“arthur please, i’m sorry!”

“do you want to know what i really think of you y/n?”

“what do you really think about me?”

“i hate you. i hate you so much”

i can’t help but chuckle slightly at how blunt he sounds.

“why do you hate me arthur?”

“because instead of moving on and being happy you are too focused on the past, it’s unbelievable!”

“oh that’s interesting arthur.”

“well i mean selfish people do like to talk about themselves.”

“am i selfish then?”

“yes, very. what with your money, talent, beauty and health-”

“beauty you say?”

“of course you mention that you vain vanity. when you have all these gorgeous things around you, you can only focus on yourself.”

i go to grab his hand, wearing the ring that’s been there for many years.

my voice comes out mockingly as i say “i will be good for you mother arthur i swear!”

he sighs again.

“are you not disappointed with yourself?”

“no”

“you’ve never done a day of hard work in your life and the ring you’re wearing right now looks absolutely ridiculous.”

“charles gave me that ring”

 silence.

“i feel sorry for you and i wish you would just get over it.”

“you don’t have to feel sorry for me arthur, you’ll feel like this one day”

“no i won’t, i would rather be respected if i couldn’t be loved then act like a child.”

the next words i let out are nothing but my drunken words.

“what have you done recently anyway arthur? have you done any? or have you been too busy ogling over women that aren’t yours. poor laura clark. LAURA CLARK everybody.”

i leave the silent room quickly leaving arthur to pick up the pieces of the night. 

“i’m so sorry laura.”

it’s been a couple of days since everything went down at the new years party and yet arthur hadn’t been able to get the girl off his mind, even when he was driving on the bloody simulator! he wondered what was going on with him. was he sick in the head to imagine a different girl lying his bed instead of his very loving girlfriend?

“hello arthur!”

speak of the devil and she shall appear. 

“i don’t want to talk to or see you” 

“oh arthur my darling i’m so sorry for how i behaved, it was the alcohol that made me say it, please forgive me!”

i pout my lips at arthur, putting on my best puppy dog eyes,

“the alcohol you say… did you have some before coming to see me?”

“only a little, and i mean it is happy hour somewhere so you can’t expect me to not drink away. plus, i’ve only had a little so you can’t be too hard on me” 

my hands part slightly to show visually how much i’ve drunk, which if i must say so myself isn’t the same amount i normally 

“no one else is doing it, so i’m doing it”

i ignore him, focusing on the track he’s currently “driving”

“soooo when are you getting on the track, mr leclerc?”

he finally pauses the track to turn and face me,

“never.”

his face is sad but i can see he’s accepted his future,

“um what are you talking about. what do you mean ‘never’ “

“i mean that i am never going to be ‘arthur leclerc the best driver ever’, i am always going to be know as ‘arthur leclerc - chalres leclercs little brother’ “

“oh arthur that’s a strong statement to make, at what twenty?”

“well i’ve matured quicker. i see the world how it actually is and it’s made me realise that no matter how hard i try, i will always be in the shadows. so i gave up.”

he’s an idiot. a handsome one but still an idiot 

“why though? you have so much talent that shouldn’t be wasted.”

“well you should know that just because i have talent doesn’t mean i can make it. many people have this talent and yet they’ll never ever get as close to where i am right now. and i want to either be the best or nothing, no in-between and right now i am nothing so i will stay that way forever. ” 

i don’t say anything for a while. 

“so now that you’ve given up with racing, what are you going to do instead?”

“well i guess i will get a job and settle down, marry someone and have some kids.” 

i laugh.

“i guess that’s where laura comes in hm?”

he pushes me playfully and scoffs.

“don’t make fun, she makes me happy”

arthur knows that what he’s saying is true, but he just doesn’t mean it the way you would assume he means. laura is a nice girl, someone that makes him happy when he’s having a bad day, but only in a platonic way. he’s tried time and time again to make himself love her the way she does to him, but no matter how much he tries, he just can’t because when he closes his eyes, the girl that was his past is there. her haunting smile plastered on her face, eyes bright. 

“i’m not, trust me! though i have to ask, are you engaged to be wed yet?” 

“no…”

the air is tense between us, yet i can’t help but continue to ask questions.

“but one day you will be won’t you, you’ll get down on your knee for her soon won’t you.”

“probably, yes. she makes me happy”

“well that’s… nice but it sounds weird to hear arthur leclerc is planning to marry someone one”

“well i’ve always know i wanted a family young, so why should i be embarassed of that?” 

“no, i never said that i just mean that… just that as long as you love her that’s all”

“well i think we have the power to choose who we love and that it doesn’t just happen.”

“i think history would disagree with you.”

“well i am not history i am just a human. a human that wants to just make my family and friends proud. i want to have a family and a wife who i can love so very much. i want to support my family and i want to love whoever i want. i want to get over my past and focus on my present and future and yet i just can’t.”

the sound of a car honks, causing both of us to jump in fright. arthur speaks first

“that’s probably laura now,” he turns to me “how do i look? do i look okay.”

i look at him. i really look at him.

“you look.. you look so handsome, you are handsome arthur”

i don’t see it, but arthurs cheeks are now a deep shade of red. he attempts to smile it off and then runs off to meet with laura, leaving me to watch from the window. they embrace and they laugh and smile together and i can’t help but feel nauseous in my stomach but it can’t be jealousy. it’s just me feeling protective of this boy, the one i’ve known since i was a child. yes, yes that’s what i’m feeling.

a few more days have passed and me and arthur have managed to become great friends. i’ve also managed to bury my feelings, or whatever i’m thinking about him as well. we currently lay beneath a big oak tree in the park and we busy ourselves with the occasional conversation. arthur also busies himself, by occasionally sketching out a drawing. we’ve found peace in the world.

the silence is broken when arthur asks “y/n when are you going to see your parents?”

“oh, quite soon.”

“you’ve said that over a dozen times this month, trust me if i earned money every time you said that , i would be the richest person ever!” 

“well, short answers will always save trouble and i don’t know exactly when.”

“they expect you y/n, so why don’t you just go see them.”

“i’m not ready to go back i guess and if i go it means we won’t get to hang out together anymore.” 

i jump up and playfully swat him, bringing my hand up to punch him but he grabs it before i can even lower it. i stare at him long and hard, analysing ever single detail on his face. i really don’t get how i never noticed how good looking he was when we were young. and at least he notices me.

“what are you doing?”

“i’m looking at you.”

“no y/n, i mean what do you want to do with yourself?”

“i’ve been trying to write a play, figured that would be something that could get me somewher-”

“it’s a waste of your time.”

“well what better idea do you have for me?”

“go back to your parents and go back to uni and get your degree, just make something of yourself, doing something you enjoy.”

he returns to his sketching once again and i can’t help but become curious of what he’s drawing. arthur obviously notices my curiosity and hands me one of his old sketches, one he did years ago. it’s of me and charles, me staring at him and him looking off into the distance. pffft how much of an idiot was i? he didn’t see me as more than a friend and it was clear even if you took one glance at our behaviour towards each other, what with me always wanting to hold him close and look him in the eye and he only wanted to hang out with me. i guess i was just blinded by “love” to notice that the love wasn’t even love, it was friendship.

“when did you do this one?” 

“um that one was … the day of the beach i think, the day i met laura” 

just the mention of her name, makes me want to run home and scream and cry into my pillow. god and she’s his fiancé as well. i feel bad because i haven’t even met the girl but i just can’t seem to stop my blood from boiling and then i get this realisation in my mind. 

i’m in love with arthur leclerc. god, people must think i have an obsession with the leclerc brothers, but i can reassure you i don’t. i don’t see him as charles leclercs little brother anymore, i see him as arthur leclerc the boy who has made you the happiest women in the world by just being next to me, and never have i felt more grateful for that day on the hill, because that day i was set free and without that day i never would’ve seen arthur as anything less than a friends younger brother. yet i’m too late now, his heart has been stolen by another and i will never ever, get the chance to hold him close and feel his fingers running through my hair. i will never get the chance to speak to him about how much i love him without being rejected so horribly. i will never get to tell him that his laugh is like a drug to me and that his smile is a cure to all of my pain or that he is.. he is just everything to me. he is someone that a prince is based off of and maybe in another world, he would actually be my prince, but we don’t all get our happy endings.

“when is she coming back?”

“a week maybe two but when she gets back, we’ll start getting the planning together.”

i don’t know where i get the confidence to utter the next words but i do.

“don’t marry her.”

i prepare myself for the harsh rejection but all arthur can let out is a quiet

“what?”

“i said don’t marry her.”

my voice is louder this time and i’m sure he can hear what i’ve said.

“why?”

“you know why arthur…”

i take two steps towards him and go to grab his hand but he pulls away.

“no. stop it y/n… you’re being mean and you know it. you can’t just mess with my feelings like that, i’m not a toy.”

by now tears are slipping down our cheeks.

“why?”

“i have always been second to charles, in everything and you know it, but what you don’t know is the amount of times i’ve cried over you and the fact that charles had gotten the girl was heart braking and yet now you care when you feel like you like me back. y/n that’s not fair. you can’t just pick and choose when you want me. especially not now when i am happy-”

“but your not happy and you know that! i see the way you are with her, leading her on. you’re acting like charles did to me so don’t call me mean.”

“but you are y/n and i won’t stop this wedding just for you to love me for a month or two, no i won’t do it, not when i’ve spent my entire life loving you.”

it’s been a day since arthur last saw you and he already missed you like crazy. he really don’t know how charles managed to give up such an amazing girl like you, it was a topic he would often think about. either way, arthur couldn’t stop thinking about you and your sad eyes as he left you alone in a hurry. he rushes into his friends house, excited to actually finally have peace for the first time in weeks

“hello mate!”

“y/n was just here.”

“was she?” 

“yeah, she said she would be off to see her family for a bit” his friend nods and arthur can’t help but smile. 

“when will he be coming back here?”

“why do you care so much, what do you need to chat about so urgently?”

“… i just told laura that i couldn’t marry her.” 

“does you breaking up with laura have anything to do with y/n?”

“yes.”

he doesn’t even bother lying because he’s in love and no one is in his way. he can love the girl of his dreams freely, without shame and with the knowledge that she loves him back. wow, that feels nice to say.

i watch as arthur stands at the train station, waiting with his luggage, occasionally checking his watch, when i pull my car up, getting out and walking towards him slowly, still aware of the tension between us.

“i couldn’t let you go home alone and i figured i needed to go home as well, even if you hate me.”

“oh y/n i don’t hate you.”

“i love you” he wants to say, but he can’t.

we hug and when he pulls back he holds eye contact with me and says “i’m not marrying laura”

“i heard.”

“i didn’t do it for you, i did it for me so don’t you think for even one minute, that i did this for you, it’s because i realised, that i didn’t love her.”

i look at his face carefully, with nothing but love and affection, when i slowly take his face into my hands and kiss him. i kiss him slowly at first and then a bit quicker, arthur matching my movements, we kiss for the time that we could’ve been in love with each other and we kiss to grieve the time we lost, and i know that this is how it’s meant to be. this is what home feels like and this is what forever feels like. arthur is the one for me, 

meanwhile, charles sits with his mother, taking a break from the stress of the races, looking out at the world, thinking about his past and future, when suddenly, his mother speaks up.

“did you know that y/n is coming home soon?”

that makes charles interested, straight away lifting his head encouraging his mother to speak more.

“is she?”

she nods “arthur messaged, he’s coming home, he said he misses us dearly and he said that y/n will come home with him.” 

“hmm that’s nice of her to join him.” charles stands up quickly and begins to pace the room anxiously.

“what’s wrong?”

“i think maybe… maybe i was a bit quick in turning down y/n.”

“well, do you love him?”

“i think that if she asked me again i would say yes…. but do you reckon she’ll ask me again?”

“i didn’t ask that charles… do you love her?”

“ i want to be loved.”

“you know that isn’t the same thing”

“i’m just so lonely ma”

“i know charles, but it’s okay.” 

charles suddenly feels the need to express his words for me, writing pages and pages. it reads:

‘dear y/n, i miss you more than i have ever missed anything. i haven’t been able to get my mind off of you for a couple days and i’ve realised that maybe letting you go was one of the worst i could’ve done. i think it was because i was young and i didn’t want to make such a big commitment that could possibly ruin our friendship, which was ruined anyway as soon as i said no. but time has moved on and i’ve matured and i’ve come to the realisation that i cannot live another moment without waking up beside you and that i was a fool to turn you down. i just hope that even after all this time i’ve still managed to stay in your heart because i can say without a doubt, you will always be in mine.”

once finishing the letter he places it on the pillow of the guest room, the one that the girl he loves will put her head on. he feels free after putting it down, finally being able to say the words that have been on this conscious for a while.

“charles” i say, nudging my friend out of his slumber. “charles.”

his eyes flutter open, widening once he sees me.

“y/n! oh y/n your really here!”

he jumps up and bundles me into a hug, one that makes me stumble backwards whilst wearing the biggest smile i had ever seen in my life.

“oh charles, did you miss me?”

i feel charles nod against me and i smile.

“i really did, you don’t understand and no words can express exactly how happy i am to see you either.”

“oh thank god, i thought that you would’ve forgotten about me. anyway, i wanted to speak to you, alone.”

“yes, yes what is it. come sit down.”

the air is different. it’s not like we’re twenty one again, always laughing and joking around with each other. no it isn’t like that at all, because we’ve grown up.  

he attempts to make a joke. “how was arthur, did he bother you on the flight with his constant chatter?”

i laugh and smile, just at the thought of arthur. 

“yes but i loved it.” 

“speaking of arthur, where is he? did he stop off somewhere before coming here?”

“he’s speaking to your mother, and you just know that no matter how hard i tried, there was no way i was getting my boyfriend out of her clutches.” 

i don’t see it, but charles’ face drops instantly as soon as the word ‘boyfriend’ leaves my mouth. boyfriend? arthur leclerc dating y/n y/l/n?

“your… your what?”

once i realise my mistake i sigh in dissapointment.

“oh god. now i’ve done it! we were supposed to keep it a surprise for dinner but look at me! i ruined it!”

“what surprise?”

 “well, that arthur finally plucked up the courage and finally asked me to be his girlfriend of course!”

“you and… arthur.” 

“yes, it happened very fast, one day we were just friends and then the next were in love.”

“are you really…. in love with him?” 

“yes. oh and charles i wanted to say just one more thing and then we can just sweep it under the mat forever. i have always loved you charles and i probably always will but the love i have for arthur is different…. you were right, by the way, we would’ve killed each other.”

“ye- yes.” 

“i think we were lucky to not go any further than a friendship so thank you charles.”

“oh,… y/n/n.”

 “did you know that no one calls me that apart from you.”

“what does arthur call you?”

“princess.” i’m joking of course but i don’t charles realises, once again proving that we are now different people. 

“that sounds like him. you deserve each other.”

“charles… can we still be friends?”

he swallows painfully and forces out his words.

“of course y/n, forever.”

we move to go downstairs, myself going to greet their mother again, whereas arthur meets charles at the bottom of the stairs, pulling him to another room.

“did y/n tell you?”

“yes.” 

arthur looks at him expectantly and charles feels the anger overtake him and he feels as if he could fight with arthur, just as they used to when they were children but manages to calm himself, reminding himself that getting angry with arthur would ruin the relationship he had with you, again. 

“arthur, i’m happy for you, i really am. it was written in the stars.”

“oh, thank goodness, i wish i could’ve told you myself but it just happened so fast and i was just really scared of how you would feel because, well you know why.”

“no, no. never.”

"so you aren’t angry?”

yes. yes he is but never would he say it out loud, it would be a secret he would take to the grave.

“life’s too short to hold a grudge against your brother.” 

“thank you charles.”

and arthur really means it, because without charles no, arthur never would’ve gotten the girl of his dreams. without charles saying no, he would still be standing on the sidelines and he would forever be in debt with charles for that.

but charles didn’t mean it, because due to charles saying no, arthur got the girl of his dreams and due to charles saying no, arthur got to leave the sideline and now no amount of repaid debt would ever make charles’s heart feel half as full as it did when y/n was his best friend.

but y/n was never his, she was arthurs and he would just have to accept that.

EMILIANO MARTÍNEZ & KEPA ARRIZABALAGA - Chelsea FC vs Aston Villa - April 01, 2023. (Photo by Chris Lee)

men don’t understand shit about football

losing to arsenal is painful but jorginho being part of the arsenal team that we’re losing to is soul destroying

champions of europe you’ll never sing that  🎵

this has to be my favourite post ever on instagram

Eid Mubarak to all my Muslim followers. May you spend it in good health and happiness. 💚

THANK U BABES🥰❤️❤️

everyone say happy birthday to @melodramainterlude HAPPY BIRTHDAY

thiago and kepa saving us from pure humiliation..

heyy!! could u write a fic based on the video and kai and sophia where the documentary follows christian and his girlfriend (maybe two or three years) around?

(if she is a lawyer or something, that would be very lovely!)

a day in the life (c. pulisic)

TW: none

WC: 1.1K

“Hey everyone. It’s Christian Pulisic here, and today I will be showing you guys what a normal day in my life looks like” Christian says as he holds the front door open for the cameraman to enter. You were still upstairs in your shared bedroom, finishing getting ready for class. You were currently in law school to become a lawyer.

“Usually I wake up, say goodmorning to my girlfriend and then prepare breakfast for the both of us. We usually alternate with our cooking schedule depending on whether or not she has class that day. On our days off, she usually cooks a larger & more thought out meal for us, while I usually whip something up quickly for the both of us to eat whenever we have early morning plans” He shrugged as he made his way to the kitchen.

You could hear movement in the kitchen, so you assumed Christian and your guests were there. Once you had finished zipping up your boots, you made your way downstairs. You entered the kitchen to see Christian rummaging through your refrigerator while the cameraman sat at the island, holding the camera still on the countertop.

“Hi” You whispered to Chris as you walked behind him, causing him to turn around and acknowledge your presence.

“Morning, sleeping beauty” He smiled as he leaned down and pulled you in for a quick kiss. Moments after, you turned around and acknowledged the camera.

“Hi everyone!” You smiled towards everyone in the room before turning around and grabbing two glasses to pour some juice into.

“Are you good with a bagel or did you want something else?” Christian asked you as he made his way around the kitchen.

“A bagel sounds perfect. Thank you Chris” You replied before sliding past him to grab the jug of juice from the fridge.

“So Chris, would you say it’s hard to manage your time evenly between football and your personal life?” The interviewer asked him as you sat down at the small dining table for two. You watched Chris put away the spread before bringing both places to you and seating himself across from you, all while the camera slowly panned to your seats.

“I would say it’s been difficult at times. I mean, Y/n is a law student so she’s constantly busy and I’m usually at a match or at training. We’ve been together for a little over 3 years now, so we’ve gotten the hang of things but there are times when we find ourselves a bit too busy and unable to spend time together” Chris spoke honestly before looking over at you, signaling if you wanted to add anything.

“That’s why we cherish and enjoy our days off so much. You’d think that living together would allow us to see each other more often, but 80% of the time that’s not the case. We’ve both got really busy schedules and we try to designate at least one day a week to just relax and enjoy each other's company” You added.

“Y/n, when and how did you & Christian meet?” The interviewer turned the conversation over to you.

“It was actually when he played for Dortmund. I was visiting some family and they invited me to attend a BVB match with them. I went and we had great seats, like right behind the bench. Mind you, I didn’t know any of the players or anything. After the match had ended, I was getting up from my seat when he came over to me and just started a conversation before asking for my number” You looked over at Christian to see him blushing like a madman.

“Did you guys start dating after that?”

“We talked for a bit, but we didn’t start dating until a year after we met” Chris added

“If you could go back and do it all again, would you?”

“Without a doubt” You smiled at Chris to see him smiling at you as well.

You both finished eating, kindly asking if the cameraman could stop recording for a few minutes while you ate, to which he respected and shut the camera off before walking into the other room. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ After you both finished eating, you went back upstairs to brush your teeth before grabbing your bag to leave for class. You jogged down the stairs, seeing Christian in the middle of answering a question the interviewer had asked him. You didn’t want to interrupt, so you waved at him and blew him an air kiss. Christian’s eyes focused on you when you got to the bottom of the stairs, noticing your movements before you turned to leave.

“Wait Y/n” He called for you as he made his way out of the kitchen and to the foyer, where you were standing, to say goodbye.

“Give me my goodbye kiss” He teased as you got on your tiptoes and pressed your lips to his. You felt his arms wrap themselves around your waist as he pulled you in for a hug. You copied his actions, instead wrapping your arms around his neck. You both stayed like this for a moment before pulling away. You reached for your bags but Christian beat you to them.

“No no no, this is my daily routine” He joked with you as he held the front door open for you. You both got lost in the moment, clearly forgetting that he was in the middle of an interview. He carried your bags to your car and shut the passenger seat while you situated your bags properly beside you.

You rolled the driver’s side window down to speak to him briefly before you left. He bent to the height of the car and rested his elbows on the spot where the windows would be. “Text me when you get there, alright?” He asked as you nodded.

“I will. Do you have training today?”

“Nah, I was booked for press today & tomorrow, but tomorrow’s plans got cancelled so I’ve got a free day”

“Maybe we can plan a picnic or something for tomorrow since you’re free now”

“Whatever you want, princess”

“Alright well I’ve gotta get going or else I’ll be late”

“Bye, Y/n. Have a good day, I love you”

“I love you too, Chris. See you later” You smiled as you put your car in reverse and drove off, waving at Christian before you drove out of the community.

Moments later, you received the notification through your Apple Carplay that Christian had sent you a text. You clicked for Siri to read it out loud since you were driving and could not look at your phone.

Siri: Christian said “As soon as you left, I turned around and realized the camera people were still here… LMFAO”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

taglist

@ithinkimokeei @myheartgoesvroom @mounthings @tall-tanned-tattoo @itsnotgray @alwaysclassyeagle @charlewiss @mortirolo @chelseagirl98 @lovelynikol16 @username-envy @pulisicsgirl @lizzypotter14 @bracedes @thoseboysinblue @swimmingismywholelife @neverinadream @pulisichavertz