Choas Of Thoughts

Jude Duarte be like:

I don't believe in heaven or hell but if there's a hell, I'll meet you there.

The Void

The rustle in the leaves, the pitter and patter

Not a single noise, not a single clatter

The void is watching but the world is blind

The creaks have quieted yet the mess is in the mind.

Winds picking up, the window rattle with violence

Where are my thoughts, guess I lost them in silence.

Rain is falling but the man in front of me stays dry

Is he the sins I committed or simply the void?

My hands are covered in blood in the dark

She turns on the light and it's just the ink

I ask her to tell me the difference and she's silent

For the pen and the gun are both weapon and waste depending on the hands.

To: Heaven

For: My Darling

Skyscraper of glass, bluish hues of dawn

Fever dreams mid-november

Memories lost in the winter strom

Whispers of mist on my window

Ghost of your touch haunting my dreams

Your reflection on my bedroom mirror

Yet when I blink you're gone.

Ocean of grief drowning me to its heart

Stay for a little while, my sweet darling

My eyes have gone dry, no tears left

Show me mercy, even if it's fickle

I'll fall to my knees, gazing at heavens above

Strings of our heart intertwined

Yet we're two world's apart

Come back my darling

Or expect my arrival.

Oh Love, my blood staining your clothes. I bleed of not my essence but all the memories and promises you gave me. Feel it soak in your clothes, a part of us you failed to keep.

Being Alive

So ruthlessly cold and empty,

These bedsheets mocking my sorrow.

Hearing every tick of the clock,

Reluctantly gazing at the mirror,

Seeing nothing but a wasted potential.

Strong is the urge to feel the life drain out of me,

Yet the dreams keep me awake.

All the thrill left to be experienced,

And all the cities left to be loved,

Leaves me wanting to see the life play out.

Setting the regrets on fire,

A toast to the feeling of being alive.

Let's get out and wander to a new country,

Dancing to the melodies we can't revive,

Singing the songs one never hears again in life.

Falling in love with strangers you see on the train

Knowing you'll never see them again.

Loving the cafes you know you'll never forget,

Turning the pages of a mysterious book,

In hurry, whose title you'll forget.

And when I told you I loved the city, you set it on fire. Now I'm afraid to hand you my heart.

Your heart is getting colder, let me be its holder. I am just a rover so let me be your shoulder.

A Careless Mistake

Strolling too deep, wilted leaves under my feet

I wish to run, scream and hide,

Yet I wander like a lost soul

My footsteps so quiet yet I can hear it behind me

No use to turn, it'll be gone until I find it.

My eyes so dry, I'm holding back tears

Yet I cannot show it my weakness,

It loves the sweet taste of my fear

It is addicted to the scent I leave behind

I wish to skin myself alive.

Calling out to me, it mocks my bravery

I hate myself for running into it's territory

It won't let me go until I'm on my knees

Begging for mercy it will never lay out for me.

I'm falling too deep as it creeps towards me

I know it has caught me and I'll never be free

The prison awaits me, I'm nothing in it's domain

I'll never be grieved cause I'll never be found again.

I have many regrets but oh my love, I'm afraid you will be that one I'll never be able to forget.