I Feel Like The General Public Forget That Trauma Does Indeed Affect The Daily Lives Of Ppl

how dare they cut this cut this out??!?!!

!!!

i ... searched up how to throw it back ... what have i become???!

is it a sign of mental illness that i have an emotional connection to my calendar?

i either go for the carefree younger sibling or the stressed out older sibling

theres no in between

that fact that theres barely any video essay about mikasa should be evident enough that she didnt get the development she deserved

best album of the year you say? advice by taemin

i know this is too much to ask ... but i want the csm fandom, the jjk fandom and the tkr fandom to be bestfriends

yall are rlly gonna make me cry with these dad!gojo and little megumi fanarts

*implied mental illness*

Atsumu has been monitoring your behaviour for the last three days; large, hooded eyes followed your every movement and scanned even the little twitches of your brows. He made sure that you never left his field of vision. This wasn't because of his lack of knowledge about you - really, ask him anything about you and he wouldn't even take five seconds to think.

Your favorite food?

The classic chicken burger from Wendy's, and if you were hungry enough, with fries and a wrap. And for drinks, it was always coke - or sometimes when you're craving something sweet, a mango milkshake.

Favorite way to style your hair?

Trick question; you liked your hair down. You once said that it hurt your scalp too much whenever you put your hair in a ponytail.

Favorite movie?

Another trick question; you prefer to read.

He also knew the most obscure details about you too. For example, you tend to wash cups and glasses first before the bowls and plates, then forks and spoons for the ending. Or the fact that you only sneeze in the morning, and that too at least five times. Or, the most scariest of all to Atsumu, that you never seem to blink at all.

No, Atsumu prided himself on being the encyclopedia of you. Which was why he noticed there was something off about you. Sure, every time he came home he was greeted with the same smile he fell in love with five years ago; and sure, you were up and about every day, doing housework as well as maintaining the status of being a responsible college student. And yes, you were eating and drinking every day even without Atsumu's presence.

But Atsumu also knew that it took you an hour to get out of bed. He'd watch you go into the bathroom, do your business, and come out to make breakfast. Yet, your toothbrush remained dry. You never neglected your showers but took an extra thirty minutes every time, which prompted Atsumu to sit outside, leaning against the bathroom door, for anything that might remotely sound like cries. You ate and drank but he swore you always took one spoonful and one gulp the whole time, opting instead to ask about Atsumu's day. You barely went outside these days when your favorite dates used to be the ones where the both of you took advantage of the warm sun as you strolled along the parks.

Little by little, Atsumu had collected as much evidence as he could, determining at last that something was bothering you. And so, he waited. He waited for you to come to him because he didn't want to invade your privacy lest he assumed something wrong and upset you even more.

But you never did.

You continued on; you smiled but never enough to show your teeth, you woke up every morning after a night of muffling your cries, you went about your day without a break even though you barely had any energy.

And it was hurting him.

"Hey."

You looked up at him from the project you were working on, tired smile on your face. "Hey."

Atsumu frowned at how hoarse your voice had gotten. "I want to talk about something."

"Oh? Did something happen at practice today?"

Atsumu's heart warmed when you started to check his hands, the crevices of his fingers, then to his face. How can you be this selfless, he wondered. You hadn't been doing well, yet here you were, worrying about Atsumu when he should be the least of your concern.

He took your hands into his, pressed kissed upon your knuckles. "No, nothing happened to me. Don't worry."

You deflated immediately. "Don't scare me like that." You pouted and it was all Atsumu could do before he had to avert his eyes. "What is it, Atsumu?"

"Don't think I haven't noticed it, love."

You halted. "Wh-what?"

Atsumu frowned, then stared into your eyes. He knew how much you hated confrontations, second only to direct eye-contact, but he had to do this. He couldn't let you suffer like this. "Are you okay?"

Your eyes widened. Before you could deny anything, however, Atsumu continued in a soft voice: "I've noticed you ... you aren't - well, you don't look okay. You haven't been the best for a while, and - and I'm getting worried. I was gonna let you have your space, I thought that that's what your needed from me, so I didn't say anything for a while, but ... but you haven't said anything. And I'm afraid you'll only get worse if I didn't say anything so I -"

"I thought no one noticed."

Atsumu wondered if you knew you had just completely wrecked his heart. "Babe, you are not invisible. I care so much about you and it hurts me that you've been suffering alone. I - god, I should've done something. I'm sorry I've failed you."

"Hey, no." You grabbed his face, shaking your head. "Don't apologize, you did what you could, Atsumu, I don't blame you for not knowing what to do. I - I should apologise. I'm sorry I haven't been the best, I know it must've been so confusing for you. It's been confusing for me too and I don't know why-"

Atsumu enveloped you as soon as he saw those teardrops roll down your cheeks. It hurt to know how much you were hurting all this time, and he wasn't able to do anything about it. Hell, he hated himself for waiting so long. You wept onto the crook of his neck, muffling your apologies.

"Hey, it's okay. You don't need to apologize. It happens. You're only human, babe, and human emotions are difficult to deal with."

The both of you stayed like that for a while, clutching onto whatever you could as if the other would disappear any second. When you'd calmed down enough, you broke apart, and instantly Atsumu was smoothing out your hair, wiping away your tears, asking you if you're okay.

You smiled. "Thank you."

"You deserve it, love." Atsumu pressed a kiss to your forehead. "You wanna tell me what's going on? And no pressure, I won't judge you. If you want, I can wait still. Whatever is comfortable for you."

And he promised, he'd never fail you again.

can i just say how much it hurts to read this?? this is a kid, barely 18 years, and caught up in an unfinished vendetta of the adults around him. you can literally feel how confused he gets as the chapters go on and when it gets to the climax and you read this... goodness, it gets real. like you understand how fucked up this all actually is.

i cannot stress this enough that he is a kid. a kid and he watched as the uncle he loved and respected and admired and held upto a standard, the only adult who seemed to truly understood jin ling, who saw how lonely he was and got him a puppy because he couldn't make friends, confess that he was the one behind so much of the disasters and deaths that occurred around him. not only that, but jin ling realizing that the smile his uncle puts on his face is fake. that he can lie so boldly and without a second thought. that maybe he lied about everything; maybe this person isn't who he says he is. all of this in just a matter of seconds.

and then we get to the foundation of his character. in the beginning, jin lings character was all about revenge. for himself, for the death of his parents. all he carried inside of him was hate. it also probably didn't help that jiang cheng was grieving for his sister and his parents at the same time while punishing any could-be wei wuxian. seeing these things, how could jin ling not hate the people who caused him to lose so much?

and now, there is all these conflicting feelings about who the true murderer is. he knows wei wuxian is the yiling patriarch and involved in the death of his parents but he's spent far too much time with him to hate him now and knows that it wasn't really his intentions in the first place. the guy is actually very likeable and has helped jin ling in all the times that they have met. wen ning who was the cause was merely a corpse out of control at the time. he also feels a lot of guilt towards it. as much as those things didn't excuse the murder of his parents, it wasnt reason enough for revenge either.

and jin guang yao, who he thought was kind and genuine. turning out to be a fake. all the likeness he has for his uncle in the past, should he turn it into hatred now? but he really can't. or rather, the past 16 years of positive memories are winning over the hatred of a minute.

so who should he hate now?

because he didn't deserve anything that happened to him. his parents didnt deserve it too. so who should he hate now? who should he exact his revenge upon? who should he blame?

he cries. because these are all heavy emotions and complex feelings for a kid. all the anger inside of him, the pain of being deceived, pouring out of him the only way it can. it is weak and jin ling probably shouldn't cry in front of so many people but he can't help it anymore. he doesn't want to let go of the hate he's nurtured for so long yet he doesn't have the energy anymore, nor does he have anyone to put the blame on.

and then there are those three words that just really tugs at my heart - "he felt wronged".

p.s: the scene where he is unable to look and listen as his uncle takes his last breath. chills.

jin ling is my fav character from mdzs and i just wanted to make a post to appreciate him. he is honestly so underappreciated. the way his character develops from just a really angry child to a child wounded by the actions of others is just *chefs kiss* he is so traumatized i wanna wrap him up in a blanket and hug him for eternity 🥺🥺😭😭😭😭