Ahsoka: If Anakin And I Were Both Drowning, Who Would You Save?

an episode of the clone wars

yoda, hitting a bong: stole a fuckton of holocrons, the cowboy did

ahsoka: well ok! let’s just stab him until he gives them back

anakin: haha y-

obiwan:

anakin:

obiwan:

ahsoka:

anakin: no ahsoka……. it’s not the jedi way

I’m curious...

reblog if what jkr says is no longer canon to you 

bruce uses his Dad Nicknames when he’s exhausted. Some examples to explain what I mean:

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“Damian, baby, kiddo, please drop that sword.”

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“Cassandra, my only daughter, my sweetheart, if you could just stop for one short moment.”

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“Dick, my first born, my rock, get off the chandelier.”

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“Jay, lad, you’re driving your old man insane, chum.”

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“Brilliant, brilliant Tim, please go to sleep.”

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“Stephanie, honey, you don’t even fucking live here.”

reblog for anons to tell you who you are out of the members of the batfam, birds of prey and the justice league

comedians: it's so difficult to be funny nowadays without sjws getting offended

robert pattinson, without an inch of effort:

Chiron: A lot of famous people were actually demigods. Amelia Earhart, George Washington, Harry Houdini…

New Camper: Is there anyone current that I would know?

Chiron: Have you ever seen a True Crime Documentary on the kidnapping of Percy Jackson?

New Camper: Wait… are you talking about the kid who blew up the Gateway Arch????

Chiron, wiping away a single tear: We’re so proud.

Damian, who grew up with advanced tutors in every subject at the loa, would NOT be chill with having to denigrate himself towards putting up with fucking. Gotham level teachers. so like what if after finding out one of his previous tutors that 1) Damian actually considered acceptable, 2) is skilled in multiple subjects, and 3) is Talia approved to the point of adoption, is actually in Gotham working as the Red Hood, Damian just stops attending the school Bruce signed him up for.

he’s smart about it; gets dropped off and picked up outside the entrance every day, lets Alfred/Dick/Tim/Bruce see him enter and exit the building, acts like he’s adjusting really well to the civilian school system, and yet on gods green earth that boy has not attended a single fucking class in five months. three minutes into first period he’s out the window and getting a ride to Jason’s safe house to continue learning at a pace that he actually benefits from.

i feel like having helped raise/teach the kid for a couple years in the league and having worked with/been on sort of amicable terms with a few other of Damian’s tutors (the ones that didn’t get killed anyway), Jason would be familiar enough with Damian and his little ways and habits that he would know that the kid would 100% benefit more from home schooling that whatever bullshit public school Bruce put him in. Damian’s very self motivated so he knows there won’t be an issue in slacking off if he allows Damian to ditch school and sort of rule his own schooling from Jason’s apartment. he’ll do his own advanced mathematics, history, science, whatever the fuck he feels the need to brush up on during that day. English and most physical training Jason does take control of, but that was what they did in the league anyway so that’s normal to them; they’re just settling back into what for them is a normal routine.

the only thing Damian doesn’t like about ditching Gotham Prep and going to Jason’s for school is that Jason forces him to join social groups at least twice a week, whether it be a reading group at the library, a painting club, volunteering at a hospital or animal shelter, just so that he can still learn to interact with civilians. still, he likes that the activities are always tailored to what Jason knows he enjoys and it is preferable to being in a school for five days a week, so he lets it slide. he even gets a bit more vigilante training bcs occasionally he gets to tag along with Red Hood during the rare day mission, so long as his identity is hidden. Jason always drops him back off at the school fifteen minutes before 3 so that Damian can sneak in and walk out the front doors when the bells go, just a normal school student like everyone else.

he keeps stealing letters addressed to bruce and intercepting phone messages regarding his absence, and eventually he fakes emails from Bruce that withdraw Damian from the school as a whole. Jason’s honestly really impressed that nobody’s noticed but the longer it goes the funnier it gets so he keeps helping out. it gets to the point where it’s been like a year and he’s convinced Damian to actually test out of high school early and start attending college courses part time, so he’s literally spending his days going to Gotham Prep five minutes after classes start, picking up his little brother, secretly driving him to the college that he’s attending under the radar, and then driving him BACK to Gotham Prep before school ends so that nobody knows where he’s been.

even funnier is that Damian ends up convincing Jason to start doing a lit course two days a week at the same college. so at this point Damian is not only lying his ass off about his own education, but he’s doing it by going to college with his brother who everybody else in the family still thinks is fucking dead.

eventually Dick reminds Bruce that Damian’s class should be doing an award ceremony for moving up a year, and they all decide to go to surprise Damian with their support. they go in and Damian isn’t a part of the group of kids graduating and they’re just like ‘wait what’

one of the kids sees them and is like ‘hey aren’t you the Waynes?’ and when they’re like yeah the kid goes ‘haha cool, you know my older sister goes to college with Damian and his step-brother, it’s nice that they still get to see each other often after Damian had to move from their mom to you guys.’ and the entire family bluescreens for about four different reasons.

they eventually show up at the college and see Damian and Jason on the grass outside getting into a rapidly spiralling argument about whether or not two of the professors there are secretly having an affair and the whole thing unravels.

rlly late post but its superlords au but jon’s still a dork

I’m not just pretty, no, I’m pretty damn good

Cover Story

Obi-Wan: [obliviously marching through Padme’s doorway while she’s in the middle of a dinner party with a bunch of Senators and Jedi] Padme, darling, it appears your husband and I used up the last of the shampoo in the shower this morn– [stops as he takes note of the giant crowd in the dining room staring at him] Padme: [almost chokes on her wine, makes eye contact while shaking her head]  Anakin: [sitting further down the dining table, mouthing the word “no”] Obi-Wan: [panicking] Uh…yes, Padme. Your…husband? Um…Dennis. Anakin: [mouthing “Dennis?!” and slapping his forehead]  Padme: [wincing, immediately smiling pleasantly as Bail turns to her in surprise] Uh…yes! Gosh, I… Mon Mothma: Well, this is certainly surprising, Padme! I had no idea you were married! Mace: [skeptical] Belated congratulations, Senator. The Order will have to send you a gift. [side eyeing Obi-Wan] What’s this about Senator Amidala’s husband and you in the shower now? Obi-Wan: Ha! No. Um. I wasn’t…not at the same time, of course!  Yoda: [suspiciously watching Obi-Wan] Padme: No, of course not…Obi-Wan…sometimes stops over here to shower.   Obi-Wan: What can I say? No one has better water pressure than Padme!  Shaak Ti: I’ve always found the Temple to have adequate water pressure, but perhaps we should have Master Kenobi’s refresher examined.   Palpatine: [loving this because he fully realizes what bullshit it is] I’d very much like to meet this Dennis, Senator Amidala. Why isn’t he here this evening? Padme: Oh, he’s terribly shy. And busy. All the time. His career is very, um, demanding. Anakin: He’s a model! [Obi-Wan and Padme throw him a look] Anakin: [chewing] Super good looking. You should see him shirtless. [holds up his fork] You’ve got great taste, Padme.  Obi-Wan: [mouths “really?!” at Anakin] [everyone looks at Obi-Wan again] Uh… yes. Although one has to wonder if all that attention hasn’t gone to his head. Anakin: Hey! [everyone looks at Anakin] I think…his ego is appropriately-sized. One might also argue that his, um, modeling mentor taught him everything he knows about having an inflated ego.  Obi-Wan: [pursing his lips] Really. Because I’ve heard his mentor is actually a very level-headed individual who often wonders how he ended up in ridiculous situations where he is being made to deal with a self-absorbed young protege.  Anakin: [scowling, through gritted teeth] I didn’t hear his mentor complaining last night. Obi-Wan: [turning red] Anakin, perhaps we should discuss Dennis’ issues with his mentor another time.  Palpatine: [smirking while pouring himself more wine] Nonsense! Tell us more, gentlemen.  Padme: [laughing nervously and standing up] Oh would you look at the time!