Damian Once Suggested That There Was Something Sinister Afoot Due To The Large Number Of Young Blond

Nah fam it wouldn’t’ve died, she mighta won but she ain’t gonna die.

That bitch has the gayest fucking energy fueling her and not even the fucking lord could take that away. The only way Bella “dumbass” Swan is going to die is of her own stupid volition.

twilight au where Bella’s already an adrenaline junkie when she gets to Forks. she secured her infamy by parkouring off the main school building

Edward: so now that I’m marrying Bella I’m finally going to be able to enjoy a night with her but I’m a little confused on what to do :/

Emmett who’s had a presentation prepared since the 1940s:

People allergic to peanuts: keep peanuts as far away from me as possible or I'll die

People allergic to shellfish: no shrimp pls I don't wanna die today

Lactose intolerant people:*while eating ice cream* the weight of my sins drags me closer to hell but I sit in a throne higher than God's

You were once the greatest necromancer to ever exist. But millenia after being slain, you awaken to find yourself resurrected by someone clearly a novice.

Star Wars Battlefront II - Heroes vs Villains

#SKYWALKER FAMILY IS HERE TO KICK YOUR ASS, SHIT LORDS

Costume. Chitons.

bruce uses his Dad Nicknames when he’s exhausted. Some examples to explain what I mean:

—

“Damian, baby, kiddo, please drop that sword.”

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“Cassandra, my only daughter, my sweetheart, if you could just stop for one short moment.”

—

“Dick, my first born, my rock, get off the chandelier.”

—

“Jay, lad, you’re driving your old man insane, chum.”

—

“Brilliant, brilliant Tim, please go to sleep.”

—

“Stephanie, honey, you don’t even fucking live here.”

the thing all sherlock holmes adaptations get wrong is making the guy an irredeemable asshole who treats everyone like shit . not only is it not reflective of the original stories they miss that “nice, smart, well mannered dude who snorts coke when he needs to think” is possibly the funniest character ever devised 

re: Anakin and Obi Wan teaching Rey all the 'good moves' - one day she's gonna bust out one of those as a hail mary and it'll work and Luke's gonna be all 'YOU'VE BEEN TALKING TO MY FATHER, HAVEN'T YOU!!!'

[The Resistance, trapped in some skirmish, facing Impossible Odds] Poe: REY! We’re surrounded! Do something! Be a Jedi, damn it! Do some…Jedi stuff!Rey: [frantic] But I’ve only had two weeks of part-time Jedi training! And my instructor was severely depressed during the entire duration! And the only other Jedi I’ve ever met have been dead for several decades, and they’re really weird!Rose: [hurling a grenade] What?!Finn: [fighting back a hail of blaster fire] WELL TRY SOMETHING, REY, OR WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE!Rey: Uh…um…OK…well…[calls upon the Force and tentatively strikes a Serious Pose][everyone freezes; the encroaching First Order halts] Finn: [almost passes out]Kylo: [stepping forward, intrigued but mostly pissed off] Oh, sure! You think you’re the heir apparent, don’t you?! Well, check THIS out! [pauses, tousles his hair and pouts] Hux: [shaken] …good gods. Rey: [intensely] Ha! Take this! [dramatically drops her cloak as a choir kicks in] Kylo: …amateur. [drops his cloak, does an unnecessary backflip, swooshes his lightsaber around]Rey: Hmmph! [pulls her hair out of a ponytail, winks at a random First Order officer] Hello there. Poe: [flushed] …oh, kriff.Finn: [sitting down] …I’m gonna die. Rose: [decidedly impressed] Wow.   Kylo: [rips his shirt off] Rey: [jumps on top of a nearby cliff as the clouds part and a sunbeam shines on her, a giant gust of wind coming out of nowhere][12 hours later]Luke’s Force Ghost: [shaking his head] …you guys got to her, didn’t you? Anakin’s Force Ghost: [camped out, watching this while eating popcorn] …and I am not sorry. Look at them go! She’s amazing. And, I hate to say it, but my grandson is hanging in there. I’ve never seen anything like this!Obi-Wan’s Force Ghost: Incredible! A quadruple dramatic disrobe! Where did she even get all those extra cloaks?!Yoda’s Force Ghost: [pouring champagne while tearing up] So proud, I am. 

Helena Howard; as Ahsoka Tano