FUCK IM A FUCKING IDIOT FUCKING END ME FOR THE LOVE OF GOD UHALSKGJN GODDAMNIT THIS HURTS

People Get Tired Of You Being Sick

When you first become ill, they will show you sympathy. They’ll send you cards and hope you get well soon. They’ll call or text to check in and see how you’re doing. They’ll cut you slack. They’ll be understanding when you have trouble keeping up. 

But once your illness becomes a chronic condition, they wonder why you can’t get better. They show impatience and frustration. They stop trying to include you in plans. They ask why you aren’t trying harder. They don’t get it. They just want you to be abled again so that you’re not inconveniencing them.

People get tired of you being sick, but they don’t stop to think that you’re probably fucking tired of being sick, too. They don’t take the time to think about how you’d love to just get over it. They don’t care enough to realize you didn’t choose this. 

- yes, sometimes

Chronic Illness flare clinics need to be a thing.

They need to have holistic chronic illness clinics. You can go to them while you’re in a flare. They have low sensory rooms with soft beds and low light tv’s. Have doctors to administer flare reducing meds/pain meds, but also have holistic professionals like massage therapists, acupuncturist, mindfulness workers, physical therapists, chiropractors etc etc.

Basically so that you’re entire body and mind can heal because the reality of this is mind and body health need to be aligned.

This is especially necessary because going to an ER for a flare can be so terrible and increase the intensity of the flare. It’s so bright and you have to wait for hours to be seen by doctors who let’s be honest don’t specialize in chronic illness, and are trying to jam in as many patients as they can because of being over capacity.

This is what healthcare would look like if it was designed by the sick.

Looking in the mirror while dissociated like

Music always moves me in such a way, nothing can compare. It makes me feel so alive, sending me to other worlds.